


Silent Whispers

by violetsdicaprio



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Based on a Lana Del Rey Song, Carmen - Freeform, F/M, Family Issues, Fluff and Angst, Good Slytherins, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter), Mental Health Issues, Minor James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Minor Marlene McKinnon/Dorcas Meadowes, Multi, Mythology References, Not Canon Compliant, Peter Pettigrew is a Marauder, Pre-Canon, Realistic, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:54:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 31
Words: 151,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26863987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetsdicaprio/pseuds/violetsdicaprio
Summary: Have you ever heard of Eleanor Westbrook?A traditional pureblood family. Nothing more, nothing less. Except they were admired by all, in the muggle world and the wizarding world. The Westbrook's were on a pedestal that was threatening to crumble. After a secret is spilled, the family is threatened by an unknown source. To protect his reputation, her father evacuated the family. Only leading his two daughters into more harm. Fleeing her home in France, with her little sister, Father and Step-Mother; she subsided in a quaint town. Transferring from Beauxbatons to Hogwarts in her 6th year, under the protection of Dumbledore. What could go wrong? Eleanor housed many secrets, she was sweet and sensitive but a lion was caged behind the delicate pale complexion...
Relationships: Sirius Black/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

  
  
****

**"** **FATHER** **?"** **HER** **SWEET** voiceinterrupted the patters of rain that glossed the rural scenery. Henry was quick to drop his troubled expression when he saw Eleanor.  
"What is it, Ellie?" He replied with a huff, packing the last few objects into a trunk.  
"Of course I have no objections to moving, especially because we'll be close to Nana Holmes, but you never told me why we must move all of a sudden." She spoke, her hands resting behind her back as she stood with perfect posture.  
"Did I not." His eyes quickly flickered around the room before clearing his throat. "Well it's because we invested in a bakery down there. Plus we'll be closer to your mother." Conan smiled, grabbing the bag and exiting the room.  
However, Ellie knew when someone was lying, she knew when someone was withholding information. This always caused a spike in her interest and she would do anything to retrieve the rest of the information. What would a pureblooded wizard with both a muggle and wizard job want with a bakery?  
You see Eleanor Westbrook was a wise girl, smart, sophisticated and potentially more bright than those of age. Yet she was so underestimated because of her sweet looks and soft spoken tone, what a time to be alive...  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


As the gigantic black shape skimmed over the treetops of the Forbidden Forest and the lights shining from the castle windows hit it, all that was saw was a gigantic, powder blue, horse-drawn carriage, the size of a large house, soaring toward them, pulled through the air by a dozen winged horses, all palominos, and each the size of an elephant.

So unusual, it wasn't even supposed to be a grand entrance but due to them setting off later than expected, the carriage came hurling across the grounds at about 7 am. So some students roamed the corridors, some watched out their dorm windows and the others kept sleeping. For the small minority that were awake, maybe 10 witnessed the elegant carriage, the group waited patiently for whoever was inside. They stared intensely, just eagerly waiting. Who could it be? Why were they here? What was going to happen this year?  
  


Soon a blonde haired girl and a mini carbon copy, with dark brown hair, hopped out the house sized carriage, escorted by the groundskeeper. The blonde girl yawned softly and stretched her arms up after the long journey. Trekking up multiple flights of stairs was quite common for the two girls so they had no problem getting up to the castle. A small group of 5 or 6 students had gathered to see the girls, jaws instantly dropped as they marvelled at their beauty. Even at Beauxbatons -the school known for its very gorgeous students- the girls stood out. Probably due to their mother.

"C'est comme s'ils n'avaient jamais vu de femme auparavant ...[It's like they've never seen a woman before...]" The blonde spoke out loud, this only spiked the curiosity in the surrounding students, Adelaide just giggled softly before linking arms with her older sister. Walking away their hips swayed in sync, Ada pulled down her skirt slightly that matched in style with her sister's but not in colour. Unfortunately with the fame came strict rules, they had to act a certain way, look a certain way, talk a certain way, in both communities. At the minute they both wore an overcoat, El's was fastened but Ada's wasn't. 

Hogwarts was grand, however, it had nothing on the school they had practically grown up in -especially El- but this she could get used to!

Long, Espresso shaded hair swung in its usual straight state. Her eyes reflected the sapphire oceans, they shined brightly in the dull dawn. She was as irresistible as diamonds, with her delicate rosy lips and luscious long lashes. Her only flaw was her broad nose but she seemed to suit it. Unlike her mother, her skin was a light olive shade in the summer and had a light dusting of freckles across her nose and cheeks. Apart from that, she was still her double. She only differed from her sister in eye colour and hair. Eleanor had received the traditional green eyes and blonde curls of the Westbrook family.

Passing a group of rowdy boys, she knew they stopped and starred but she wasn't fussed as she ventured forward, soon reaching a grand gold statue of a bird, the man mumbled something and El was pretty sure he said "Sherbet lemons." but that seemed a rather odd thing to say.

After being escorted up the stairs, they were soon to be sorted, with Ada going first. A woman in thick emerald robes and a black pointed hat appeared with a scruffy looking piece of leather. Once she pulled out the stool and formally introduced herself, McGonagall placed the material on Ada's head. The hat barely touched her head when it screamed "SLYTHERIN!" A flash of fear coated the 5th year's eyes and she began internally begging her sister would join her. That was their Father's house when he was there. Ada had only just realised that the two may be separated. She hoped they'd be together.

"GRYFFINDOR!" However, that was not the case... Ada felt like she should burst into tears, Slytherin had a certain reputation currently and both girls didn't exactly like the rumours, El more so than Ada. So it was a slight relief for the blonde haired girl. 

Rushing to her side, El crouched down in front of the girl. They had never been separated before but they wouldn't let some house system divide them. Eleanor, however, was worried about her father's input.

"Tout ira bien, je vous le promets. [Everything will be fine, I promise.]" She whispered softly, ignoring the other presence in the room. "Just while you sleep, okay?" El spoke calmly and Ada nodded, collecting her thoughts and wiping her eyes. Inhaling a deep breath.  
  
  


After 10 minutes, Ada had been taken by the Slytherin prefect and hers had just arrived. A swarm of sandy blond hair clouded her vision as a pale boy entered the room with a smile plastered on his face, he obviously loved his prefect duties as his badge was worn with pride.

"Salut! Je m'appelle Remus." The boy spoke, causing the girl to giggle. A light blush swept across the boy's cheeks, thinking he'd said something wrong.

"Sorry." El mumbled, the prefect taken back by the British accent that enchanted his ears. "I appreciate the effort, but I am actually English." He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, eyes darting to the floor, he still hadn't looked at the girl. Sensing his uneasiness, she jumped to her feet and he was only just taller than her. She was quite tall herself, maybe five foot eight or nine but Remus must've been at least five foot ten. "I'm Eleanor." The girl greeted, sticking her hand out for him to shake. The boy had thick, floppy and very light brown hair and his eyes were most peculiar. Most could confuse them with amber eyes but if you stare long enough you could see the underlying moss green tones infused with unique golden hues. His face was a soft square shape which paired nicely with his sharp jawline! Like a line, his lips weren't big at all but they contrasted perfectly with his nose. His hair was dishevelled and fell in front of his scarred face.   
Her eyes glistened slightly, she knew the signs very well. Eleanor couldn't be sure but if he disappeared in a week, her thought would be assured. He shook her hand, slightly confused by her formality. Scanning her face, he was drowned in a sense of familiarity. Eyes like the inside of a diopside crystal and layers of platinum silk cascaded past her shoulders, it frustrated him that he couldn't remember.

"Remus Lupin." He said before drawing away his hand and grabbing the door, his head was spiralling with thoughts. The blonde walked out first and descended down the staircase and through the halls as if she knew where to go, she didn't, so she slowed down. This allowed Remus to catch up with her, in a few strides.   
"What did you say your last name was?" Remus asked, interrupting the comfortable silence.

"I didn't." She replied as they started ascending the stairs to the Gryffindor common room. The two had received many curious looks, especially the girl. Some stunned, some confused, others jealous. When he raised a brow at her, a smile broke out on her face. "My name's Eleanor Westbrook." Ellie sighed as if it meant nothing to her. However, this information caused Remus to pause on the stairs.

"As in-" He began but the blonde interrupted with the nod of her head. Strange, she obviously didn't want to talk about her family. Wasn't they the advertisement of the perfect family in both muggle and wizarding world? He pondered from all the magazines he'd seen, his mothers ranting and his friends discussions. Even the Walburga Black held that family in such high respect. Little did they know that everything was an act. That's something that never ends well.

"If you stay standing like that, you'll catch flies." She teased from the top of the staircase. The boy shook his head and smiled lightly before jogging up the stairs. Eleanor was leaning on the railings as Remus stood in front of the fat lady.

"Leo corde." He spoke clearly and the portrait swung open causing El to hum in amusement before strolling in. Remus wasn't quite sure about her, she seemed off. After a moment he followed her in. _Maybe she's not good around new people,_ he thought. That was far from the truth. Eleanor knew she couldn't do anything to upset her Father, he had never spoken about the house of Gryffindor. Just like everything else he didn't like, he didn't speak of. "Remember the password or you'll be locked out." Remus said as they approached the staircases, Ellie was instantly greeted by the fire's warmth, making her feel queasy in her thick black trench coat. "Your room is at the very top, it's the only room on that floor." He told her making the blond frown.

"You're not going to show me?" She asked, causing him to let out a breathy chuckle. The boy approached the girl's staircase and she witnessed the steps shift into a steep ramp. The girl quirked a brow, as she processed what just happened. "Is it the same for me on that staircase?" Eleanor continued, pointing towards the boys staircase, finding this whole ordeal weird. This was nothing like this at Beauxbatons.

"No, just the girls dorms." He answered after shaking his head, the girl smirked lightly. She was about to respond when two people came stumbling down the stairs. Emerging were two boys, very different in appearance and height. At the sight of her, they both froze in their spots. As soon as she looked at them, one of them sharpened up, wearing a mischievous smirk and matching twinkle in his eyes. He had a thin face, dark brown hair, similar to Adelaide's, and milk chocolate eyes. Circular black frames drew attention to his perfectly structured face, sharp and chiselled, the early morning sun seemed to make him look radiant. Another thing to boost his enormous ego. Shabby locks of hair covered his forehead in a messily neat heap that he'd ruffled up for the tenth time that morning. Potter was a lean boy, about six foot, gaining his muscles from the amount of quidditch he did, whenever the boys weren't up to mischief, he'd be on his broom practising. He was the captain now. "Oh, Eleanor, this is James Potter."

"Hi." She smiled with a small wave as the two walked closer. Peter wasn't like the other marauders, making him the odd one out. He was five foot five and slightly tubby. Both his eyes and his hair were a light brown. His eyes were small and mouse like and so was his ears. Never one to be flamboyant, he completed the group perfectly. Always ready with the snacks, the boy was a good laugh and kept the other three on their feet. Not one to participate in the bullying, he was frequently seen cheering them on or setting up the next prank.

"And this is Peter Pettigrew." Remus added, making the boy wave with his lips pressed into a line. He was definitely not good around new people.

"So you're the new girl, eh?" James asked, crossing his arms over his chest whilst looking her over.

"No, definitely been here for years." She tilted her head, her lips pulled into a sarcastic smirk as she responded. Remus had an amused smile on his face and so did Peter.

"Isn't there supposed to be two of you?" He then asked, ignoring her last comment but his smug smirk had gotten wider.

"Yes but she's obviously not here is she." She retorted causing him to roll his eyes lightly. "She's in Slytherin." Eleanor told them and all their faces dropped. James was about to make a snide comment when the girl raised her brow, he paused. "I'm very much aware of their reputation but my sister is not like that small group of Slytherins. She just is very driven and ambitious." She defended as the others kept quiet. Faint footsteps could be heard from the other staircase and when she saw the figure emerge, she knew it was her time to go. "Well, I'll see you boy later." She told them, before departing to the staircase.

"Oi, Eleanor." The girl heard James call out. She stopped and turned to face him. "Meet us here before dinner, yeah?" He asked. El paused, watching as the figure from the other staircase joined the boys.

"Sure." She answered with a smile and disappeared upstairs. He turned back to his friends and joined the three boys. They had plans for the Sunday and were not going to change them.

"Who was that?" Sirius questioned as James returned to them.

"Eleanor Westbrook, new student." Remus answered for James as they headed towards the portrait hole. The black haired boy smirked at the name and then turned to his best friend.

"Don't you have her poster on your wall, mate?" He teased the bespectacled boy causing a fiery blush to spread across James' cheeks. He moved to punch Sirius for letting that information slip but the boy was too slick, running out the portrait hole with James close behind. The other two boys were laughing at their antics as they left, leaving the common room peaceful again.

The girl climbed the stairs, all the way to the top, her mind flickering between her sister and her father, she dreaded what was to come. She stopped in front of her room, preparing to meet whoever was on the other side. Sucking in a deep breath, she opened the door and walked in - only for there to be one girl on a central bed. Someone she instantly recognised. Fiery red hair framed her face and contrasted heavily against her vibrant emerald orbs. Her pale skin was infused with a light rosy blush and sprinkled with light freckles. Unlike other girls, Lily seemed to glow, radiant with natural beauty. The girl was equally pretty on the inside as she was on the outside, forever kind and caring to those who deserved it. When she wasn't in the library, she was either with Severus or the girls, she didn't have time for anyone else, especially not Potter and his antics. Apart from that, Lily was five foot five and had a top hourglass figure that was impeccable. The girl immediately placed her book on her bedside table and sat up to assess who it was. A large smile plagued her face as she jumped up and pulled Eleanor into a tight hug.

"I've missed you!" She whisper-shouted into the girl's ear as her arms wrapped around El's neck, tightly.  
"I've missed you too." Eleanor replied with a wide smile as she was dragged over to the beds.  
"Well this is yours." Lily told her which Eleanor could have guessed from her fancy light blue and gold trunks. "You'll be sharing a room with me, a girl called Mary and another called Alice!" She exclaimed, the girl found a way to be bubbly. The two sat on her bed as El looked around.  
"It feels strange being here." Eleanor told the girl, her smile subtly falling as she examined the room. Lily watched her for a moment, holding back her own distraught from that statement.  
"I know you didn't want to be here but at least you're not alone." Lily offered, causing Ellie to look at her oddly.  
"No, it's not that. I love being back home, I just haven't been home since..." Eleanor told her, running a hand through her hair. After a short moment, Lily grabbed her hand and smiled at her.  
"Let's get you unpacked, you have a lot of catching up to do!" She told her and Eleanor agreed, the two of them jumped up and grabbed a suitcase each. Lily had grabbed the one with her clothes and Eleanor grabbed the one with her decor. She placed a record down and let the music play. They both spent their time flicking through all of her stuff, Lily held up the girl's dresses to herself, seeing which ones would suit her or not. The two laughed, teased and danced, just like old times. "Are you ready to go?" Lily asked, placing the last pairs of shoes away. The girl nodded, hanging up her coat. "Wow." She gasped causing El to freeze in her place, a shy blush making its way to her face.  
"What?" Eleanor questioned, doing a little twirl to show off her outfit. Wearing a light brown tartan skirt with a thin black turtle neck, her black socks went up to her mid thigh and her shiny black oxfords were platforms.  
"Beautiful." Lily gushed, linking arms with the girl as they ventured out of Gryffindor tower to meet some more people.  
  


♱  
  


After receiving a tour around Hogwarts and countless stares, the two decided it was best to go to the great hall. Eleanor wasn't exactly sure where she was going but she'd figure it out, just like everything else. Since the two had arrived late, due to a difference in term times, it was now halfway through October so she had a lot of catching up to do since school was in full swing. Thankfully, they had arrived on a Sunday so she could get familiar with the school and the people before submerging into exam stress.

The Great hall was as grand as she had expected, from scale to detail - it was mesmerising, especially the ceiling that reflected the outdoors. It was currently cloudy outside, a chilly Autumn breeze sweeping the leaves away as everyone resided inside to keep warm.

As they walked down the aisle to sit at their table, someone jumped in their way. Marlene Mckinnon was quite eccentric, in her looks and her personality. Always energetic and never missed a moment to laugh. Her hair was slightly wavy so she ended up straightening it most of the time. Like wheat, her hair was golden and silky, never a strand out of place and not a split end in sight. A light pink birth mark descended down cheek bone in the shape of the knife gash. Her eyes were hazel, almost amber. Marls was petite, a slim frame and short in height maybe five foot one at a push. She was always getting the girls into parties and held the highest record for the amount of people she had kissed. The girl was amazing at guitar, piano, violin and was often caught playing or singing.

"ELEANOR!" She squealed, catching the whole room's attention. The height difference was huge causing El to reach down to hug her back. "It's been so long. Well, ten weeks but that's still far too long in my opinion." Marls told the girl causing her to smile. "I love your outfit, honestly, didn't you wear that in Milan?" She questioned, referring to the holiday Eleanor took them all on at the end of July.  
"I definitely did. It's one of my best outfits, of course I had to wear it. First impressions and all." Ellie told her, finally able to get a word in.  
"Not like you need to, ninety five percent of them have already heard of you." Lily teased with a small grin.  
"Well." She responded, throwing her arms over the two. "There's nothing like a little jealousy to keep them motivated." El added jokingly causing the two to laugh. "That reminds me, where the hell is Delilah?" She asked, wondering where the last member of their group was. Almost everyone in the hall watched as the girl with tight sandy blonde curly hair skipped down the rows of seating. She had greeny grey eyes that twinkled when she smiled. That smile was so hypnotising too. Her figure was pear shaped, long beautiful legs and wide hips. The girl was about 5'11 and was always in platforms, making her much taller. Her skin glowed in the early morning sunlight, since her mother was Hispanic and her father was Black, she was a light umber shade. Delilah lived in her own bubble of just her and her four friends, she thought other people disliked her, especially since no one talked to her or noticed her when she was around. However, she paused mid skip. Those four friends had become five. She gasped before sprinting over and engulfing Eleanor in a hug. 

"Darling, you're finally here!" Delilah said in her usual soft tone. "I can't believe you're here, this year is going to be even better." She told them and the other two hummed in agreement.

"I don't know about that one but you'll all look good this year, I can promise you that." She told them, sitting down at the Hufflepuffs table. Marlene and Delilah had ducked under the table to sit at the other side of them.

"Oh that reminds me! We have to introduce you to Isadora and Thomas. You'll love them." Marlene told the girl and she smiled.

"I'd love to meet them." She replied scanning the hall for someone but unfortunately couldn't find who she was looking for. 

"So, where's Adelaide?" Delilah asked the question that Lily had been thinking about for the past four hours.

"She was sorted into Slytherin." She told them and each of their faces held a different emotion. Lily looked excited, Delilah surprised and she couldn't place what Marlene was expressing.

"I see her more of a Ravenclaw." Delilah pondered out loud making El smile.

"She's always been cunning, remember when she tricked Marlene into drinking vomiting violets right before our show." The sister reminisced, making two out of three laugh.

"Hey! We could have won that night." Marlene declared.

"Yeah if you could make it out the bathroom." Delilah added causing Marls to pout. "There's always next year." See Marlene, Delilah and Eleanor had formed a band in first year when she first met them. It wasn't serious until Lily suggested they take part in the 'battle of the bands' in Milan. They had their own song, written by Lily herself and was only lacking a band name.

"Yeah and we still didn't come up with a name. What were we going to call ourselves? 'Ada screwed us over last time' the band?" Marls quizzed with a skewed face that made Ellie laugh, she couldn't help it, it just came out.

"How about 'We Have More Pressing Issues.' Is that acceptable?" Lily asked rhetorically.

"I like it, very catchy." El added, her fingertip tapping the wood as she spoke with an amused smile.

"Darling, the only pressing issue you have is Potter." Marls retaliated.

"Potter is not an issue, he has nothing to do with me or my life." Lily said in a sharp tone. It was an obvious lie, just by the defensiveness of her tone.

"I for one, didn't think he was too bad. I think you like to exaggerate, Lils." Eleanor told the group, lily gasped far too dramatically before speaking.

"He is an arrogant little toe rag!" She told her, wagging a finger in her face, Eleanor laughed once more.

"One thing I'm sure of is he is not little, but the arrogance I can see. Definitely need a strong build to hold a head THAT big." She emphasised, getting a giggle out the girls. "But seriously, have you ever tried to get to know him? Aren't you the one that says 'don't judge a book by its cover'?"

"You're right but Potter is different. He's an open book. I've seen him and the marauders do some awful things, especially to Severus!" She explained causing Delilah to cut in.

"Not all of them." She said as they all stared at her, the four were silent. Eleanor had some serious catching up to do, boy trouble seemed to be a major issue...  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


The day was drawing to a close, with dinner fast approaching, the two Gryffindor's had retreated back to their dorms after picking up Eleanor's time table. Both Lily and Eleanor had picked similar Newts, so their timetable almost matched. That was good enough for Eleanor, seen as Delilah and Marlene only shared one class with her. She had remembered to meet the boys at the bottom of the staircases, much to Lily's protests. The thought of seeing him again made her heart thump twice as fast and twice as loud, her leg shook uncontrollably whilst she sat on the edge of her bed - waiting for lily to freshen up.

Once the girl was finished in the bathroom, El grabbed her wand and began to descend the stairs; it was oddly quiet, especially for the marauders. She had a fill of their antics over the years from Lily and the other two, making her very aware of their pranks. Stopping momentarily, she caught up to Lily and walked through the arch way, hearing a few giggles and whispers. Just as she expected, a bucket full of unknown gunk rained down on them, barely missing Lily. However, the substance slipped down like there was an invisible umbrella over them. El gracefully stepped over the ring of gunk and towards the portrait hole. Meanwhile, Lily was getting riled up, ranting to herself about the mess. That's when a very confused Potter came out of his hiding spot to assess the situation and was utterly confused when he only saw Lily. When the redhead saw him, her fuse exploded.

"Was this your doing?" She demanded to know, stomping closer to the boy whose eyes instantly widened in fear causing El to giggle under her breath.

"If I say no, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?" James shot back with a smirk on his lips, her face instantly dropped and Eleanor took that as her queue to step in.

"Are you ready to go?" She said, one leg was slightly out, her arms were crossed and a brow was raised. Lily brushed past him and James stood there in shock, at some point his friends had come to join him when they realised his plan didn't work. The two girls walked arm in arm until El paused. "You're going to have to try harder than that." She told James, a mischievous glint in her eye caught him off guard. They continued to walk, watching the girls laugh like they had been friends for years, as the boys trailed behind them like lost puppies. Utterly confused as to how they were so close already.

Arriving in the hall, her eyes immediately fell on Adelaide who had stuffed herself between two other girls. Her head was hung low and her hands were clinging to the fabric of her skirt, not invested in what was happening around her. A swoop of guilt washed over the sister, knowing exactly how she felt: overwhelmed. When she didn't look up, she left to sit down by Lily, not really knowing what to expect. At Beauxbatons, there was a set menu but that didn't seem to be the case here. Not long after she sat down, she was joined by the boys. Remus sat next to her, greeting her with a wide smile. James sat opposite Lily, which she was acting upset about, and Peter was opposite Remus. She didn't want to look ahead, knowing exactly who was there. Sucking in a breath, she looked up to meet those pools of molten silver, the long black hair, the sharp bone structure and of course a smirk. For some reason, she couldn't help but smile when she saw his face and suddenly it was hard to breath. Thankfully, she had sucked in such a deep breath so she didn't go rosy. Every time she thought of the boy, the same thing happened and she never understood it. Like she was drawn to him but at the same time she couldn't face being in close vicinity to him. Her heart would beat so fast that it would explode but at the same time she could be her true self around him. Sure, she got to see him a minimal amount of times a year but he was at the back of her mind, no matter how hard she tried to forget him. The boy seemed to be a curse that was disguised as a blessing. She had last seen him at the yearly ball of pureblood 'royalty' where she convinced him to leave his family, he had been in such a state that it was his only option. When he didn't show up on New Years Eve or at the many gatherings through the summer, she had assumed he had followed her advice since his family was there but he wasn't. Until two weeks ago, she thought she'd never see him again and she learned to repress whatever feeling or thought she had of him. But now he was here, sat right in front of her and she had no idea what to say. So she said nothing, her eyes slipped to her dinner plate but he didn't look away until the food appeared and a conversation emerged.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  


After eating a sufficient amount of food and people were beginning to disperse, Eleanor made her move. She wiped her face with a napkin and whispered into Lily's ear, the redhead nodded and smiled out of understanding and the blonde left. Peter and James didn't even notice her exit as one stuffed their face and the other talked quidditch tactics with Sirius. His eyes followed her for a while as she departed, knowing exactly where she was going. A blonde and a brunette walked out the hall, arm in arm like she had done with Lily earlier, as James kept talking in his ear, not noticing his distraction. In a way, it was weird seeing her. She was the reason that he didn't dread going home at Christmas or over the Summer. For him, it was as easy as talking to her as it was to James. The only reason he left was because of her influence. He would be forever grateful because that was one of the best decisions he had ever made.  
  
  


_The clock neared twelve and they both knew it was almost time to go. They had been talking for the last three hours and an hour before that they were dancing. Currently, the two occupied the large balcony at Schivon Manor, where the yearly Christmas party was held. After many occasions of exploring the building, this had become their favourite spot. Being in the middle of nowhere really helped the luscious scenery. From cherry blossom trees to red catchfly and daisies, the gardens surrounded the outskirts of the lake below. The moon was days from being full, leaving both teenagers on edge for the same reason, and had cast an elegant glow upon the two and the timid water. Both of them sat on the floor with their backs to the railing, watching the dim lights in the ballroom, not caring if their clothes got dirty or not. Eleanor wore a champagne silk dress that had spaghetti straps and a slit up the left side and Sirius wore a black suit as always, changing the variation each time. They had been passing back and forth a bottle of firewhiskey, hiding from the rest of the party but the two didn't mind - they preferred it this way. After a gulp of the amber liquid, Eleanor finally got the courage to speak her mind._

_"I think you should leave." She told him, they had just been talking about his home life and how much worse it had become. If she hadn't seen the healed cut above his jaw, they may have never spoken about this. The boy looked at her briefly, a hint of conflict swirled through his stormy eyes. "I know you want to protect your brother but by staying with them, you're stuck in a loop that you can't escape. If you can't get out, neither can Regulus." Ellie began to explain and he listened intently. "If you don't save yourself first, only one of you makes it out and sometimes nobody does. You can't keep living like this..." She expressed, whispering the last sentence as she looked away from him and to the balcony's doors. He examined her face before taking a sip of the drink, letting her words settle in. It was a comfortable silence as the midnight breeze danced across El's and the stars twinkled above. All of it interrupted by the village's clock tower, signalling it was the girl's time to go. "I guess that's me." She sighed, wanting to stay there for a minute longer, he wanted the girl to stay too but he never admitted it. They both looked at each other before standing up. Eleanor could not be late to her carriage, she had learned that the hard way. He leaned against the railing as she headed towards the door._

_"Ella." That nickname made her freeze, a pit forming at the bottom of her stomach as she sucked in a breath. She turned and smiled at him, only he called her that. God, that boy was beautiful even without trying, she thought as she observed him. "Goodbye." Immediately caught off guard, her smile faltered. She knew exactly what he meant, they never said bye. For some reason, she could feel tears trying to spill like a waterfall. He watched her expression shift, even though he was confused, he felt the same. After a short moment, the signature Westbrook smile returned to melt another heart. She walked over to him and pulled him into a tight hug which he returned. To say she hardly saw the boy, she knew nearly everything about him, and for that reason she felt so stupid for being emotional. He was so ingrained into her life it was strange that she only saw him a few times a year. The small connection seemed to be colossal now that they were being teared apart, which was ironic because it was happening by choice. As long as he was happy and safe, she could easily never see him again. Even if she desperately wanted to._

_"Stay safe." She whispered to him as she began to pull away from their hug. His eyes stared into her own, untold whispers whirling through both pairs. That was it. She backed away and left through the balcony door. Sirius could still see her silhouette through the frosted glass making a small smile appear on his lips. The girl didn't know whether to run back and tell him everything or leave things how it was, if there was a possibility that he felt the same then she didn't want to mess up his escape. So she chose the latter, walking away and not looking back. He couldn't deny the obvious disappointment he felt when she walked away but he knew it was for the best. That was the last time they saw each other. Until now._


	2. lost souls

**_APPEARING A MOMENT_** before curfew, all the girls were tucked up in bed; ready for the upcoming week, Eleanor went straight to bed without a word. She closed the drapes and went to sleep, deciding to greet the others in the morning. Her first night there and she was already lacking sleep. The thought of her Fathers reaction kept her up, when the subject left her mind and she closed her eyes the worry flooded her once again due to the nerves. Altogether she had four hours of interrupted sleep, waking up at five thirty and laying awake. Her mind racing and chest thumping, sleep currently seemed to be a difficult task in her state. Usually, she wasn't phased by her father -well she tried- but since her holiday in Milan was plastered throughout the muggle and wizarding magazines, she was in her fathers bad books. Getting into Gryffindor was the cherry on top. Not only that, Adelaide was struggling to fit in. She had met a girl named Clementine, who she shared a dorm with, and that was it. Back at the Beauxbatons, she was used to people flocking to her, people here were envious of the girls, especially Adelaide because she was an actress and their father got her into huge Hollywood films that made even the purebloods gawk in their spot. Eleanor had advised that she reached out to others, the blonde had gotten lucky knowing Lily because they grew up together, as neighbours, but she welcomed her younger sister to join them too. That reminded her to say hello to Severus, the redhead was talking about him yesterday but the two never saw him.

Tossing and turning for about an hour, the sun had finally decided to rise and so Ellie got up for the day. Her first class was early, potions at nine, so looking presentable for the first day wouldn't be hard to accomplish. She started off with her hair, brushing it out before casting a spell to recover the curls and then moved onto makeup. Her go to items were concealer, mascara and lip gloss as she only did a full face of makeup for parties. Mainly because she was too lazy to do anything else. Finally, she placed the silver locket around her neck. It was very vintage and had such an intricate design engraved into the oval, a poppy. Originally, it was her mothers and she had inherited it. She only took it off to shower and to sleep in fear of losing it like she lost her mother. Her reflection was satisfactory for her so she vacated the bathroom to grab her robes. By this time, two of her roommates were up. Lily and another girl. One who hung posters of various quidditch players and her favourite team, the Holyhead Harpies. Eleanor presumed the girl to be Welsh or a feminist, maybe both.

Mary MacDonald was super athletic and sport was her number one priority. She was a beater on the Gryffindor team, just like Sirius, and always dreamed about going professional. The girl had the darkest skin and it was incredibly stunning, especially the way she absorbed the sun in the bright summer months. Her hair was similar in shade to obsidian and her braids were often in a ponytail because she was doing some kind of exercise. Also, she had chocolatey eyes like the others, hers appearing much darker without the sun. Built with fairly broad shoulders, it was helpful when it came to batting and never really bothered if it was "feminine" or not, she was probably five foot eight and was still growing. She was not one to gossip but never missed an opportunity to dress up at a party.

"Hello!" She greeted upon Eleanor's entrance causing her to smile, she had a light Scottish accent which seemed to shake her momentarily but Mary didn't notice. "I'm Mary MacDonald but I'm guessing Lily already told you." Mary said as her head shot to the redhead that scurried away to the bathroom. The blonde laughed lightly at her friends actions and shook her head.

"No, she must have forgotten but it's lovely to meet you! I'm Eleanor Westbrook." She also introduced as someone continued to snore in the background. The girl walked over to her trunk to pull out her uniform as Mary did the same.

"I know." She responded making El flash her a nervous look. "Sorry," Mary said guiltily. "But everyone knows who your family is, word spreads fast around this castle." She explained, El smiled softly knowing the girl had no ill intentions. Eleanor had never adjusted to being well known, the family only got their name out there after her mother passed which was not a good way to handle grief...

"No need to apologise, what lessons do you have?" She asked as she fished in her trunk for her shirt.

"Potions, then a free and then Defence Against the Dark Arts." Mary told her as Lily exited the bathroom.

"Me too!" Eleanor replied, picking up her clothes to change. She entered the bathroom and dropped the clothes on the floor.

"Oh really, what subjects did you take?" The girl asked through the door. El had slipped out her pyjamas and had begun zipping up the grey skirt, rolling it up slightly to make it shorter. She applied deodorant before buttoning up her shirt and she did her red and gold tie.

"Potions, Transfiguration, Charms, Defence the Dark Arts, Herbology and Alchemy." She answered, pulling up her signature thigh high socks. These ones were grey to match the rest of the uniform, she wasn't a massive fan of tights. Deciding to skip the jumper, she pulled on the blazer that was far too big for her but she simply rolled up her sleeve and they looked cuffed. She exited the bathroom for Mary to use. "What do you do?"

"The same, except Alchemy. That's when I practise Quidditch. I play beater on the Gryffindor team." She explained through the door, just like El had done. The blonde had drawn her curtains and plopped herself down on the bed so she could grab her text books.

"So Quidditch is a big thing here." Eleanor said mindlessly causing Lily to snort as she tied her school shoes.

"A big thing? Ellie I'm pretty sure it's more competitive then the English league." She told the blonde, earning an 'agreed' from Mary. "Didn't they play at Beauxbatons?"

"Well, not really. They were more focused on things like muggle art instead of sport. They'd be friendly matches every so often but we don't have the house system back there. We just get split into different dorms based on year group." Ellie explained making both girls curious. Mary returned in her uniform and went to wake up Alice.

"Please don't tell James Potter, he'd throw a hissy fit about how important Quidditch is." Mary said allowed before waking Alice, who sat up with manic bed head causing all three of them to giggle.

"Wh-a- Wh-e- Morning." She slurred her words, utterly confused to where she was even though she fell asleep in that bed. The girl rubbed her eyes and took in the girls smiling faces. Sharply turning towards her dresser, she picked up the little compact to assess the damage that sleep had brought. "Holy shit!" She gasped, looking around at them. "What am I supposed to do? I can't walk out with my hair looking like this!" Alice exclaimed, getting a small laugh out of the others.

"Come on, I'll help." Eleanor told her, jumping up to her feet. Her usual self was starting to return making Lily worry less. "Hurry up." She called from the bathroom and Alice was up and out of bed, speeding straight into the bathroom to get her craziness taken care of. "I'm Eleanor by the way."

Once having long light brown hair, Alice had cut it all off over the summer into a long bob with a fringe. She had proceeded to dye her hair black and it complemented her features beautifully. Dark blue eyes, a round face, button nose and a petite frame. She was around five foot four and had always had a passion for defence against the dark arts. When she left Hogwarts, she wanted to be an Auror. After a perfect set of grades in her O.W.Ls, all outstanding, she had taken nine NEWTs and never left the library.

"Alice Fortescue." She said, dazzling a wide smile that Eleanor returned. "Your such a life saver, by the way." Alice told her.

"That's what friends do." Eleanor told her, making the girl in front of her light up. When she heard the Westbrook's were coming to Hogwarts, she had never thought of Eleanor to be like this. Just like everyone else: kind and genuine. People never know what to expect with celebrities but Alice was pleasantly surprised. She'd never thought that her and Eleanor would become friends when word got around yesterday. Crazy. "Okay, stay still." El reminded her and she complied. With a tap of her wand, her hair formed into its natural state and looked ever so elegant. The blonde smiled due to her accomplishment.

"You have to teach me that spell!" She boasted out of awe as she checked her hair in the mirror, the other laughed and left Alice to finish getting ready.  
  


♱  
  
  
  


Once everyone was ready, it was about quarter past seven and they had just made it to the great hall before it got busy. Most people arrived at seven forty five, giving the girls half an hour to get what they wanted and not have to be rushed or have to wait for more to appear. Eleanor split from the group to find her sister as the rest of them found a place to sit. Half of the Marauders were already in the hall, watching the new girl strut towards the Slytherin table. El didn't care if people were staring, she found her sister and skipped over, taking a seat by her side. The girl opposite seemed rather confused until she saw the resemblance in their faces. Meanwhile, the other two Marauders had joined the group and watched the blonde at the table.

Unlike some of her peers, Clem spent her time actively avoiding the group of supremacists. They didn't exactly like her. She wanted to be open, to show her real self but she was caged. Not wanting to put a target on her back, she kept a low profile. Until now. Her hair was a light cinnamon infused with the colour of flames. Blue infused with a hint of green created the worldly look in her eyes. She went under the radar, only noticed in order to be bullied. A Polynesian princess.

"You must be Clementine." Eleanor said with a smile. "I'm El, Ada's sister." She told the girl who simply nodded, coming off as shy. Skipping over that, she turned to her Adelaide with a question. "Has Dad sent you a letter yet?" She asked informally, not worrying about speaking English.

"Not yet, he normally mails me after three days of getting news." Ada explained, watching her older sister carefully. She knew about her struggle with their Father and often felt to blame as El covered for her no matter what. Out of the two, it was clear who was his favourite, Ada always had been. That had stemmed from a hatred of El's and her mothers bond. At the end of the day, she knew exactly why she was asking, their Father may be so mad that he doesn't even write, she wished she could swap places with El sometimes, just so the blonde's life wasn't so harsh. Eleanor could be herself for once.

"Okay, meet me in the library at the end of the day." El told her sister before getting up, the younger one nodded and Eleanor left. She walked back up the row of Slytherin students until she was approached by two figures.

"El?" The voice asked almost startled by her presence. Thankfully, he had found the shampoo. His face was rectangular and his large nose was delved deep into a potion book. His skin was pale and dotted in moles that matched his dark eyes and his dark hair. The boy lacked muscle which was a good thing because he wouldn't suit it, he was thin and an average height. He mostly kept to himself, except at times he was forced to interact or if he was hanging out with Lily. James and Sirius couldn't help but tease him, over nothing. Potter was probably jealous at the amount of time he spent with Lily. They seemed to be a mutual hatred and that didn't surprise Eleanor. She wished they stopped bullying him, he hadn't done anything except defend himself. There was only a matter of time until he snapped. He dropped the book to his side as the girl pulled him into a tight hug, which was easy because they were about the same height. After a brief pause, he hugged her back still slightly shocked.

"How have you been, Sev?" She asked him, he had stopped writing letters to her a year ago leaving her completely confused. The boy scratched the back of his head, feeling a certain group glaring at him causing him to take a large step back.

"I've been busy." Snape answered bluntly causing her to frown and cross her arms in front of her.

"I haven't seen you in six years and you stopped writing to me. You don't get to use that tone with me." She declared. "You could at least act happier to see me."

"Well, no-" Her frown cut off his retaliation as he let out a defeated sigh. "Fine. I am happy to see you but if you don't leave, you'll get me battered." He tried to explain causing her to grimace, she knew he was having issues at school but then he stopped writing so she supposed that did too, apparently not.

"Okay but you're talking to me another time." She told him and he nodded in agreement but, before she could leave, she was stopped by someone else.

"Ah little Eleanor Westbrook, Daddy finally able to reign you back in." The voice spoke with a high dosage of arrogance. When there was one, there were often the other two. The girl was certain he hadn't received a single dash of pigment in the womb -except for his brows and eyelashes- his skin was the closest shade to white, his hair was platinum and was close to that of Jack Frost's and his eyes were blue crystals of the rarest form: diamonds. His hair fell in front of his eyes lazily and a tiny smirk was tugging at his lips as he watched her. His Slytherin robes were neatly pressed and his cloak and blazer was nowhere to be seen, his Hogwarts jumper replacing their existence. Apart from his tall lean physique, the next noticeable thing was the sleek black wand that dangled dangerously out of his trouser pockets, as if he was tempting fate or had a plan. Her head whipped around to be greeted by Emerson Avery, alone. He was with Snape. That made no sense to her.

"Emerson Avery, the bane of my existence." She spoke dramatically before rolling her eyes. "You're not exactly one to talk, I heard Mummy was breastfeeding you up until last year." Ellie retaliated, that boy had series attachment issues.

"Good to see you again." He said, his smirk had only widened from her comeback. A competitor that could keep up with him, that's how he saw it.

"Good to see I occupy your thoughts." Eleanor said, earning a hum of amusement from him. She winked and walked off, leaving him staring before he joined his friends at the table. The two had a weird relationship. Knowing each other since they were little, they were friends until the two were old enough to build their own views. They both had very different opinions. She didn't hate him, he had potential to be good but his father had pumped his head with elitist propaganda, he hung around with the wrong group and took every wrong turn because he wanted power fast and not sustainably. That was the only difference between good and evil though, isn't it? One is too weak to create their own power so they must steal it from others, short term it's smart but it never lasts.

Eleanor joined the three, who sat by the door, and immediately poured herself a cup of hot water, confusing the others. She added a splash of lemon juice and twice the amount of honey, stirring it until everything was dissolved. It was her guilty pleasure in the morning to wake her up, she loved the taste too, unlike tea or coffee. The two ingredients balanced each other out perfectly and it was good for her metabolism, meaning she could have another pastry if she desired. They were her loves: apple turnovers, croissants, cherry bakewell, cinnamon rolls, pain au chocolat, profiteroles, pumpkin pasties, etc. She loved them all and was all she ate, breakfast, lunch and dinner. Today she chose a simple pain au chocolat with a side of strawberries, blueberries, raspberries and grapes because she loved fruit just as much. As well as cheese but in England, it wasn't considered a breakfast food unlike at Beauxbatons. Everyone else opted for a full English or cereal with juice. Eleanor made sure to fill up her bottle with water before Potions, she usually drank four or five bottles a day. It was the routine set in place by her step mother to keep the girls in good shape.  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Once they arrived in the Dungeons, most of the seats were taken. She had the option to sit at the empty desk at the front or in the seat next to the lonely Slytherin. Eleanor obviously chose the latter. A girl who feared disappointment. She never stepped out of line out of fear of her family, they were very powerful within the community and had a reputation to uphold, one the girl didn't belong in. Unfortunately for her, she had no choice. Dorcas Meadowes was known for her expert skills in attacking and defensive charms. The Slytherin didn't have a bad bone in her body and was fascinated by magical creatures. She was five foot two and everything about her was petite, people often underestimated the power she had. Thick aviator style glasses sat wonky due to the broken arm. Tan skin, hazel eyes, peach lips, she was beautiful even if no one noticed her. She knew she was and that's all that mattered. Her posture was perfect and she held her head high. From the look of her jewellery, Eleanor could tell she was well off.

"Is this seat taken?" Eleanor asked, not wanting to take it, just in case. The girl looked up and paused, never had a Gryffindor approached her before.

"No. No, it isn't." She told the blonde, her accent was very posh and she addressed El very formally. Eleanor was used to this type of behaviour, it was very common among the students at her old school. With that, she took a seat and pulled out her potions note book along with her ink pot and quill.

"I'm Eleanor by the way but you can just call me El or Ellie." She told the girl and Dorcas' stone-like exterior slipped for a moment as she smiled. In the few seconds of knowing her, Eleanor felt a connection with the girl, one based on not knowing her true self. The blonde had been in Dorcas' position this time last year, she was still trying to escape that cage. Only in Milan did she start to find her feet, her father was not impressed and although she wished she didn't care for his opinion, she really did.

"Dorcas Meadowes." She returned, acting as if she wasn't really interested but El saw through it. Eleanor hummed before concentrating on taking notes, today they were learning about the elixir to induce euphoria. Something Eleanor needed these days.

She was glad the Marauders weren't in this class, they were next door. Whilst they walked this way, they had been sending her side eyed glances and she wasn't going to stand there and possibly get ridiculed. Although the boys had a certain reputation around this school -according to Lily- she wasn't scared to stand up to them if they dared try anything like they had done the night before.

Finally, the lesson had drawn to the end but she had been called back by Slughorn. Lily waited outside for her as she talked to him.

"I have heard great things from your previous teacher, Ms Westbrook. I heard you brewed a perfect Felix Felicis in your fifth year! That's very impressive." He spoke once the class was empty. She simply smiled, not sure why she was here, she nodded at his statement making the joyful man ecstatic. "Well I'm sure there is room for one more in the Slug club." Slughorn told her, she just frowned at him having no clue what he was on about. "The reason I wanted to talk to you was to inform you on what you have missed, I'm sure you'll have no issues catching up." He told her, rummaging through piles of paper until he found what he was looking for and passed them to her. She thanked him and left knowing she had alchemy to get to.

Unfortunately, Lily had ancient runes so the two had to depart but she was quickly greeted by Delilah, the only class the two shared. She took a seat by her friend and pulled out her notebook that was already stuffed with information. Delilah stared at the book, knowing full well her notes only took up ten pages.

"How do you know so much already!" Delilah asked in a faint whisper as Professor (or Ms) Emmell started her lesson. The two hadn't even noticed the others that had joined them. She flicked through the notes and paused on a blank page.

"Because I started in fifth year." She answered honestly, writing down the date. "I'm guessing this is your first year." Eleanor added, scribbling down the notes. A clearing of a throat interrupted the two, coming across Ms Emmell's harsh glare.

"Is my teaching disturbing your conversation, girls." She said sternly and Eleanor had to do everything in her power not to burst into a fit of laughter. Eleanor licked her lips and carried on writing. Delilah tucked a strand of her curls behind her ears before looking at her blank page.

"No but her choice in clothes definitely is." Eleanor whispered to Delilah once she had turned away causing the girl to snort. Ms Emmell wore a tattered green skirt with a vibrant indigo blouse that was far too tight for her because her arms had gone blue due to the sleeves cutting off her circulation. Furthermore, she decided to pair them with brown brogues, not flattering at all.

"I bet two galleons that she owns more than three cats." Delilah returned and the two shook on it. Before she could return to her work, she caught eyes with someone else. The one she had been avoiding. She hadn't realised him and Remus were in this class and sat right next to Delilah. It would explain why the girl kept fidgeting and why her face was blushed. He looked amused as her face reddened, he had most definitely overheard the two, she couldn't deal with this now and needed to concentrate. That was a lie, she told herself many lies to make herself feel better. This time, she couldn't help herself and had to look up, each time he would meet her eye but they said nothing. She didn't know if she wanted to speak to him so she stopped, her features became sharp as she hid any emotion that was once on her face.  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


After class, she left without saying goodbye and instead of heading to the hall, she went outside and headed towards the trees. She didn't understand why she was so stressed about Sirius, she just needed to talk to him. Simple, right? As she sat by the lake, avoiding groups of people, her mind began to race like the night before. Her back was pressed to the bark of the tree, she watched the water ripple up the grass from the strong October wind. The sky was as dull as concrete, filled with storm clouds that threatened to rain. Eleanor pulled on her cloak and covered her bare legs to keep warm. Instead of letting nature calm her down, she pulled out a small cardboard cartridge and stared at them, unsure of what to choose. It was common for people to rely on nature but for Eleanor it was different. From the day she could remember, she spent her days outside, her first act of magic was helping dying flowers in the local forest. Her mother was so excited but that was the first day her father had shouted at the blonde. Everything changed that day and she still hadn't figured out why. If it wasn't for the nearby group, she wouldn't have put them away but she did. El was scared: of judgement, of opinions, of not living up to her name. She sucked in a deep breath and stared at the sky. Thinking of her next move. If she got one problem fixed, her mind may settle but that seemed unlikely. There was always something else, Eleanor was sick of it. She learned not to complain. No one wanted to hear a little rich white girl whine about her issues because someone had it worse, she knew that. So she did the most logical thing, kept it bottled up. That way she didn't bother anyone. Playing the perfect princess was easy because everyone wants to believe in you then. When you suffer in silence your only give away are your eyes, someone has to really care to even notice...

Her hand twitched towards her pocket and the only way to stop herself was to leave, so she did just that and headed to class whilst downing her bottle of water. It filled her up and cleared her mind momentarily. The cool liquid numbed the burning craving and allowed her to carry on, she only had an hour and a half of DADA, she could manage that. Until she saw the students all gathered in the corridor, surrounding something in the middle. She instantly recognised Lily's shouts and knew this wasn't good, that girl didn't shout for no reason. There were many protests that came from the students as the blonde pushed her way through, revealing the redhead with her wand drawn to James Potter and the other three skulked behind him. His face was riddled with amusement but Ellie could see the steam bursting out of her best friend. She stepped forward grabbing some people's attention, that's when she noticed the boy crumpled on the floor. None of the others were around so she walked over to the boy to check on him. Most people kept their eye on the pair arguing.

"Sev." She said, shaking the boy as she crouched down beside him and all she got was a groan in response before he sat up, holding his head, looking around at what was occurring. His hands shot to his pockets but his wand was gone. He looked at the girl in front of him and paused. "Are you okay?" She had a kind smile that seemed to calm him.

"Fine." He muttered coldly as he pushed himself off the floor and glared down at the blonde.

"Oh, don't give me that tone. I was just trying to help." She shot back, that boy was so intolerable sometimes, her soft smile began to fade.

"I don't want your help." He spat, picking up his wand. "This was your fault." Snape told her before storming off, leaving the girl speechless. _How was this my fault?_ The girl thought, staring at his figure as he charged down the corridor, the crowd dispersing after him. Her smile had completely disappeared as she huffed, he'd come round. Least she knew who was giving him trouble, she felt a slight ache at the thought but it made sense. Especially with Lily's hatred for Potter. She got up and made her way over to the redhead that was in the middle of a staring competition with a very smug boy.

"Lily." She whispered, placing a hand on the girl's shoulder causing her raised wand to falter before she whipped her head around to face Eleanor. Her face relaxed and she noticed the boy had gone, she linked arms with the girl and walked off with her, not even bothering to turn back and finish her argument.

"Where the hell were you?" Lily demanded as she rounded the corner, the girl tucked her wand in the cloak pocket as she sat down at the windowsill. The blonde just looked at the ground as her friend examined her face. "You know you can tell me anything, right?" Her tone had changed, she was much softer spoken and had a gleam of worry in her eye. "Anything at all." She added, noticing how Ellie's eyes had clouded over, the tears wanting to spill like a waterfall. "Let's get to class." She suggested, not knowing what to do.  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


"I'm telling you, she was about to cry." Lily explained to Marlene and Delilah when Eleanor had disappeared with Adelaide. They were huddled at the desks in the library, under one of the windows as the sun was setting for the evening.

"Yeah, I don't blame her. She never vented to me, she has never cried to me or even explained her problems with me. Ellie keeps that to herself, acts like she's happy around us." Marlene told them, causing them all to think back to their memories with the girl. Each of them had had their lives sorted by Eleanor at one point but none of them knew much of her trouble and, if they did, she never talked about how it affected her.

"Do you think that's why everything happened in Milan?" Delilah asked the two. "She started acting out just after Christmas, I know Milan was fun but we came back to her, passed out and her mascara ran down her face. She acted like that never happened the next day.

"Why at Christmas though? I know why she may be upset now but are we sure that all of this links?" Marlene offered as she put her quill in the ink pot.

"The events don't have to link, her 'acting out' might be her coping mechanism. That means something at Christmas happened that triggered her actions." Lily guessed as she let her brain wander over other possibilities.

"Not necessarily, she has such strict rules to follow, I'm not surprised she started to let go. Her looks have even changed. Before, she wouldn't even dare wear a skirt, especially a short one. Remember when we to hers the summer before and she wore that dress that stopped just above the knee. I think she's trying to live for once. She's suffocated in that house." Marlene countered, going back to writing.

"Marls is right but we need to be careful, it's one thing to do every now and then but that can easily lead to an addiction. If she starts doing things to bury her sadness, that's when we intervene because we all did the same that holiday. Other than that, we just need her to open up." Delilah explained, staying coded in case there were any listeners lurking about the bookshelves. The blonde agreed but Lily was sceptical, she kept her mouth shut as El returned to her seat.

"What are we all talking about?" She asked in a joyful tone as she sat down with a bounce, her smile was wide and almost fouled Lily. That girl was good, she had practise.

"When Delilah will pick up the courage to say hello to Remus. Poor boy looked so distraught when you froze and ran away." Marlene teased, causing the two to laugh and Delilah's eyes to go wide with shock. She slapped the girls arm lightly and Marlene dramatically rubbed the spot, letting out an 'ouch' when contact was made.

"He was not distraught." She scolded her friend, crossing her arms over her chest like a sulking toddler. "Remus was just being nice because I bumped into him. That's it." Eleanor hardly knew the boy but she was not convinced by Delilah's explanation. She turned to Marlene who mouthed 'bullshit' to her making both of them giggle, the two only looked at each other as they did so, like their other two friends didn't exist for a second. Until Madame Pince shushed them. That's when a piece of paper fluttered in front of Eleanor's face, one folded like a bird, and landed on her textbook. Looking around for the sender, there was only them in the library which she found odd. Nevertheless, she unfolded the note, revealing a letter. It went like this:  
  
  


Dearest Ella,

Meet me at the Astrology tower, tomorrow at 10pm.

-SOB  
  
  


Of course it was him, who else. Her heart fluttered and her face lit up with a toothy grin that the other three caught. She slipped the note into her pocket and returned to her Herbology book, ready for tomorrow's lesson. Looking back at it, she had totally forgotten why she was avoiding him, mostly because she didn't want to speak to him first. Now, she felt a wash of euphoria, not the nerves she had before...


	3. mini skirts and ballgowns

  
  
  
  


**_TO SAY THAT_** the day had dragged on was an understatement. She had triple Herbology followed by triple potions. Least that class was done for the day. Her Herbology partner was Remus, so it wasn't too bad. Dorcas didn't talk much in Potions, she just kept her head down for the entire lesson, El would work on that. Now, she had returned to the dorms to change out of her uniform and was going to study with Remus until dinner. She had suggested sitting outside as it wasn't too cold. After her brief appearance outside, she decided that she much preferred the grounds compared to the library. The girl felt free in nature and it was much easier for her to concentrate because she was relaxed.

Eleanor picked out her jeans that were twice her size and she kept them held up with a shoelace tied at the back with a thick black belt over the top to disguise the thin rope. She paired this with a cropped black spaghetti strap top and an oversized zip up hoodie. Comfortable and fashionable, the last thing she needed was her step-mother on her back about her appearance so keeping things simple was her best option. She grabbed her notebooks and headed out.

The autumn breeze nipped at her delicate skin as she crossed the grounds, forcing her to zip up the large hoodie. She kept it hanging off one shoulder as she didn't zip it all the way up, if she got cold later she'd have nothing to cover to bring some warmth. However, that was not her main priority right now. As she approached she saw a pair of legs protruding from the tree trunk, ones she presumed were Remus', his shoes were smart -like the ones he wore to school- and were polished black leather to match his belt. The boy wore light brown tartan pants and a dark brown knitted jumper that was half tucked in and half lazily falling at his side. Not like Eleanor would admit it but he looked far better then her in that moment. His nose was delved into his transfiguration book, he hadn't even noticed her arrival and didn't even flinch when she sat beside him. He either lacked awareness or had too much of it, Eleanor could probably guess which. Once she got out her books, his attention was on her.

"So, what do you want to go over?" She asked, flipping through some of her old notes on transfiguration notes. She had worked so hard in her fifth year to get her top grades, it was foolish to stop now.

"Uhm... Human transfiguration, like Crinus Muto." He stated, not to sure himself. For someone who asked to study, the boy was fairly under prepared which Eleanor found extremely odd. The boy looked very pale and his hand was shaking lightly, a full moon only three days away.

"Starting with the most difficult then." Eleanor thought out loud, flipping through her pages to find her Crinus Muto notes, this was the simplest out of all the human transfiguration. She had used the spell on herself and Alice yesterday, it had become a part of her daily routine so she could sleep for longer. "Okay, this one is very close to the hair regrowth spell, you have to be careful or you might grow a beard." She told him, making him smile.

"What? Don't you think I would suit a beard?" The boy asked, stroking his chin, her lip curled up at the thought before she let out a laugh and his face dropped in feigned sadness. "Ouch, El, I didn't know you were so mean." He added, looking down at her, she was still laughing at the mere thought. When she looked at him, she couldn't help but laugh again.

"I'm sorry!" She said through her laughing fit, attempting to calm herself. "You definitely wouldn't suit one, I could see you with a moustache though." Eleanor added, making the boy raise his brows. "Anyways, that's not we're here for."

"Yeah about that." He said, scratching the back of his neck, avoiding eye contact with her. "I don't actually need help studying."

"Oh?" Eleanor replied, not really knowing where he was going with this. "So what do you need?" She asked him, shutting her note book and fully turning towards him to examine his stature.

"I- eh." Remus paused. "I need a favour." He let out making Eleanor smirk.

♱

Spending the last three hours together, Remus and Eleanor turned up at the hall for dinner, the girl was practically skipping down the aisle and he had a massive smile on his face. Something peculiar at this time of the month, that's why the marauders had caught on to their antics.

"I knew I was right." The boys caught Eleanor saying as they approached the group. "Believe me when I say it's not you." She added as they sat with the other three, Lily and the girls were clearly still at the library.

"What have you two been up to?" James asked, already stuffing his face with whatever was on his plate.

"Nothing." The two said in sync, the other boys instantly became suspicious. She smirked to herself as she stacked some food on her plate as the others returned to their previous conversations. The girls soon arrived and sat by Eleanor who had a plate full of roast potatoes, they were delicious.

"Isn't that right, Prongs." Eleanor caught the end of their conversation causing her head to shoot up at the strange name. It was one that Sirius had called James throughout their conversation. She watched them carefully, their friend dynamic was strange to Eleanor. They were all so different yet so similar at the same time. From what she had noticed, James was overly confident and held the aurora that he was better than everyone else. Remus seemed to be the mastermind, he was so clever and was able to get away with anything because he seemed shy and a goody two shoes, to her and the professors at least. Most students were a little scared of him due to a small accident that happened last year. After the past few hours she spent with him, she knew that was not true. Peter was very bubbly, although he hadn't talked to the girl much, and was the most optimistic out of the bunch. He was perceived as the stupid one but he could preform magic most adult wizards couldn't. Then there was Sirius, he was very much like James with his confidence and his loud personality but it was all fake. Unlike the rest of the students, Eleanor had seen the way he recoiled after saying his opinion. She saw the way his mind raced before he said a word. She saw him freeze up when a simple question was asked. She saw the way he flinched when someone disagreed with him. No one else saw that though, it was like they never noticed, not even James. He had just done it, the boy had sucked in a large breath before expressing that they should all go to Hogsmede soon, something the four had done together for the past two/three years. Eleanor knew why but she kept quiet, even when he noticed her watching. A reassuring smile was all she offered before turning back to Lily. She would ask him later.  
  
  


♱

Time was dragging as she waited to leave the common room, she wasn't even sure where the astrology tower was and she vaguely remembered the entrance. At exactly nine forty five, she set off on her ventures, wondering where the hell Sirius could be, he hadn't returned back after dinner but the other boys did. She ran down the steps and through the door on the right to make it into the main half of the building, it was followed by more stairs and a lot of thinking time for the girl, which she didn't appreciate. She had wanted to distract her mind, not give herself time to focus! Curfew was fast approaching so bumping into a teacher would leave her in a sticky situation, especially if it was Filch. She had no idea how she was going to get back but that would be an afterthought. Thankfully, she was wearing trainers so her shoes didn't echo along the cobblestone. At first, she didn't recognise the tower until the door creaked open, inviting her in. The stairs seemed vaguely familiar so she just hoped that this was the right spot. Otherwise, it would be incredibly awkward.

Once she reached the top, she pushed the door open wider to see a large balcony and in the centre was a shadowed figure. She really hoped this was it as she crept forward to check it was actually Sirius. Sure enough, it was. He spun on the spot and faced the girl, she had been so quiet that she was shocked that he could hear her. A smile graced her lips as she stood up properly and made her way over.

"How'd you know I was there?" She questioned and he smiled smugly, running a hand through his black hair.

"Why have you been ignoring me?" The boy replied, completely avoiding her question. Eleanor frowned.

"I have not been-" She began to defend herself, only to be interrupted by him raising a brow. "Not intentionally." She told him, looking out at the lake below them.

"You're a horrible liar, you know that?" Sirius said with a small chuckle making her smile to herself.

"I suppose I do, now." Eleanor mumbled to herself as they watched the water lap over itself in the mid autumn breeze. Most people would find the silence awkward but not those two, it was almost nostalgic in a way for them. Although Schivon Manor was similar in layout, the atmosphere was very different and Ellie couldn't tell if she liked it. Everything just seemed off, like warm weather on a winter's eve, she was already missing Beauxbatons. The girl loved being with her friends but this wasn't home. To her, nothing truly felt like it should, something was missing every time. She tried to fill that hole in Milan and it worked: temporarily. "How have you been?" She asked the question that had been bugging her mind since she saw him. His head lifted to look at her after he'd been staring at the moon for the last few minutes.

"I left, if that's what you're asking." He told her as he looked at her. Eleanor glistened delicately in the moonlight as she watched the boys antics, the way he froze, the way his breath caught in his throat when he realised what she meant, the way he avoided her question. Eleanor had learned from a young age to read body language because actions speak louder than words and she was right. They do.

"That's not what I was asking." El told him as she rested against the railing, her face was soft as if she would startle him out of not telling her.

"I'm better, I'm glad I left." Sirius said, yet he wasn't quite sure about the words that had come out of his own mouth, it was obvious that he didn't, making Eleanor look down guiltily.

"Do you ever think about going back?" She asked, causing him to look down at his own hands due to his nerves.

"Grimmauld place, no. Even if I wanted to, my dearest mother has already disowned me and burned me off the family tree." Sirius admitted to her.

"Where are you now?" Eleanor asked.

"James' parents let me stay with them." He told her, turning back to the lake.

"And you're not happy, are you?" She countered making him smile, a puff of air escaping his lips as he did so.

"I am. I would just prefer my own place, get out of their hair." Sirius explained and she knew what he meant. The boy felt like he was in the way and she believed his mind wouldn't calm until he was on his own.

"You feel like you're always a step away from being left." Ellie expressed, Sirius opened his mouth to correct her before shutting it once again. "From what I've seen, you have no reason to be scared."

"You're very observant." He told her as his eyes finally flickered back to the blonde who was still eyeing him closely.

"Well, you clearly aren't." She said with a smile, her smile was hypnotic - just like her twinkling emerald eyes. The boy dramatically grabbed his heart as she laughed at his actions.

"I may not be," He said, taking a brief pause. "so why don't you tell me how you know Evans?" Sirius asked the question that had popped in his mind for the last three days.

"Remus asked me that question earlier, well, how I knew Delilah. Seems like I have been the talk of your group." El teased with a small smirk on her lips.

"What can I say? Someone like you doesn't turn up out of the blue for no reason. Especially knowing someone like Lily." He told her and she knew exactly what he was hinting at. Within the wizarding community, her father had built many companies to offer thousands of jobs to witches and wizards globally. The only way he did this was through the support of wealthy purebloods, supporting him under strict conditions until he took over the muggle world too. That's how her family was so well known, built off the back of hatred and prejudice. If it wasn't for her mother, the muggle world would have never known the Westbrook's. She was the only reason that her father went into the entertainment industry because of her love for singing. Weird thing was, no one knew them before his company went big and the investors were all anonymous.

"I know Lily because I grew up next door to her." She told him.

"So that's how you know Sniv- Snape." He said, correcting himself when she raised a brow at him. "How'd you know the others though?"

"I visit Lily every Summer, in our first year, she invites Delilah and Marlene over and every year after that." Eleanor explained, waving her hands around while she talked to him. "Even spent this Summer in Milan together."

"Oh yeah, I read about that." Sirius said with a smug expression. Her face dropped and her eyes went wide while her face burned a bright red as she looked away, the boy started laughing as she tried to hide her embarrassment. Sometimes she forgot her whole life was documented, for the past two years the press hadn't left alone. She wanted her normal life back. Sure, she loved some occasional attention but this was something else. Being normal seemed far more desirable to her, yet everyone wanted to be like her or Adelaide... "So why didn't you tell me that you knew them. Wait, do you talk about me?" He asked, pushing his hair back with an amused expression plagued her face as he did so. This was the boy she first met, happy and lively. Last time, he was sullen and in his head, she was glad that she encouraged him.

"They know of a boy that I spend time with but they don't know it's you." Eleanor said, swaying away from him so she could sit safely on the rails.

"Embarrassed to know me?" He questioned jokingly, joining her on the railing.

"Obviously." She stated, rolling her eyes sarcastically. His jaw dropped before he smiled at her. "No just because you've mentioned a certain somebody that Lily doesn't particularly like, so I believed that she didn't like you either." Eleanor tried to explain.

"Ah, James. I'm sure Lily loves me." He told her, the girl snickered lightly at his statement due to Lily's many rants about the self proclaimed 'marauders'. "I think they would make the perfect couple." He admitted to the blonde.

"From the small argument they had the other day, I can totally see it." Eleanor spoke until she realised what she said and her eyes almost bulged out their sockets. "Do NOT tell Lily I just said that!" She expressed, fearing the redheads' wrath. When she needed to be, Lily was quite scary, that both worked in El's favour and completely worked against her. Sirius laughed lightly at her reaction but knew first hand what Lily could be like...

"Who's there!" A voice demanded from the doorway, sharp and cold, one that clearly detested children. Eleanor froze, staring at Sirius as she didn't know what to do. She barely made it to the tower, never mind trying to escape a dead end. The boy's face lit up in excitement as he jumped off the rails, grabbing onto Eleanor to bring her with him. He guided them down a small staircase, under the large ornament in the middle of the room, El didn't know what it was as she never took astrology as a subject at Beauxbatons, it wasn't mandatory there. The shadow of a disgruntled figure peered at the balcony, wondering where the students had disappeared to. He huffed in annoyance, searching the area for anyone. Staying in the shadows, the thrill of escaping made her forget that Sirius was holding onto her wrist. When her eyes caught sight of the situation and realised how close the two were, the skin on her wrist began to tingle under his touch and the tips of her ears became fiery. All to be interrupted by the meow of a grey and white cat. "Ohh, I've got you now." They heard the voice laugh coldly, sending a shiver down the blonde's back.

"Go!" Sirius whisper-shouted in her ear and she did so, the girl broke into a light sprint as they headed to the door, his hand now fallen off hers. Sirius had taken the lead down the empty corridors, Filches footsteps were heard close by as he struggled to catch up. Their laughs echoed through the silent castle, reminding the world wizarding of the light in such dark times. At that moment, there was no worry or regret. Just the simple thrill of teenage mayhem was enough to distract the two. It reminded Eleanor of a specific party at Schivon Manor.  
  
  
  
  
  


_After another long evening together, the pair thought it would be a good idea to wreak some havoc among the wealthy socialites. Not expecting to get caught, they threw belch powder into the punch only for Bellatrix Lestrange to snitch on them to Eleanor's step-mother, to get on the woman's good side, causing the two to shoot off down the cobbled corridors of the grand home with a very angry Annabeth on their tail. The breeze blew through the vacant halls due to the open doors, adjacent to them. Her baby pink dress trailed behind her elegantly, she had ditched the heels long ago so she could run better. The stone was freezing against her bare skin and only prompted her to run faster. Eleanor held onto the boy's wrist, dragging him along so he wouldn't get caught; he was far too cocky for his own good. They both rattled at multiple doors, trying to find one that was open. Sharp like steel, the high heel clicks were uncomfortably close as the clock struck twelve, stopping Annabeth in her spot. Sirius had finally found an open room and pulled the girl in. It was a small storage closet but it was better than nothing. They didn't even notice and were too distracted from their rebellious high._  
  
  
  
  
  


Much to the fat lady's disappointment, the two came bursting through the door, unable to wipe the smiles off their faces. Unable to breathe as they continued to laugh, collapsing by the portrait hole to regain themselves. The boys on the sofa had heard their grand entry and were waiting for the two to reveal themselves, only hearing whispers from around the corner as the three marauders worked on their latest project.

"-there's a massive poster on his wall." James overheard his best friend say as him and the new girl rounded the corner, completely catching him off guard. For some reason, that was the last person he had expected Sirius to meet when he mentioned it earlier.

"What are you two talking about?" The bespectacled boy enquired from his slouched position on the red sofa. The two were clearly surprised to see him but their faces quickly shifted into one of mischief. They turned to each other in sync before looking back at James.

"Nothing." They laughed, making James frown. Remus and Peter also seemed to find it funny too, so James pouted like a sulking toddler. How typical. El's eyes wandered over to the detailed drawings dashed around the common room before turning away like she saw nothing. She stretched lightly and yawned.

"Well, goodnight boys." Eleanor said to them, heading towards the girls staircase. One set of eyes remained trained on the girl causing a smirk to pull at her lips as she ventured up. She received a 'night' from each of the boys before Sirius jumped over the back of the sofa to join the rest of the marauders. They all stared at him quizzically.

"What?" He questioned making Remus roll his eyes and James playfully punch him as they got back to their invention. The marauders map.


	4. the yellow acacia

**_FROM THE DAY_ **she realised, Delilah wanted to help but she didn't know how. Thanks to Celine, Eleanor's best friend from France, the four girls began to recognise the symptoms because the girl was so open about her lycanthropy. Unlike Eleanor and Delilah, the other two weren't so accepting at first and it was all to do with fear. After knowing Celine for so many years, they came to terms with the condition and constantly felt guiltily because of the way they reacted. When she was young, Eleanor and Adelaide were exposed to all kinds of people because of their mother, meaning they didn't share the same prejudice views as their father. Whereas Delilah was never one to judge as she knew how badly judgement could hurt. To be honest, Delilah wasn't sure if the other girls had caught on about Remus, Eleanor definitely had because she acted the same around Celine as she did with the boy - with extra care, something only Delilah noticed- and she never said a word to the others in case they didn't know. It wasn't her secret to tell. Remus had no idea that she knew and Lilah wasn't fond on confrontation, especially since the matter was so private. Furthermore, she hardly spoke to the boy. Yes, she may have had a crush on him since second year but it was only that; a crush, or so she thought. So there was definitely no chance in him telling her. Therefore, the hufflepuff used one of her many passions as a way of sympathy and support, Madame Pomfrey was a massive help and never said a word when Remus asked who they came from. In true Marauder style, they devised a plan to catch the culprit. The suspect obviously knew about Remus' condition and that put the boy on edge for the last three years. So, when the moon approached, tensions were high along with the pain and suffering he already faced.

"Think about it this way, Moony, after today you'll have one less thing to worry about." James said, shovelling some bacon into his mouth as he talked to the groaning boy. Remus' face was planted firmly on the table due to the raging headache that made him struggle to focus.

"Not if it's Rayne Roldrick." Sirius joked slyly, making fun of the larger Slytherin girl with the wild hair and the quiet demeanour. Him and James giggled like little school girls while Peter smiled widely, picking at his food as he held back a laugh.

"Why would that be a problem?" Remus grumbled, he was barely audible but still came to the girls defence. He'd spoken to her, once or twice and she was a nice girl. Most people liked to make fun of her because she defied all of societies 'norms'. If it was Rayne, he wouldn't be bothered. Anyone who had been so dedicated would be special to him.

"Padfoot's just being a prat." James said, giving his best friend a nudge as Sirius smirked and James tried to calm himself. "It doesn't matter who it is." He added indefinitely, not so confident in his words.

"What if-" Sirius tried to talk but was thankfully interrupted by Peter.

"Look who it is." The boy said, grabbing the attention of all the Marauders. James leaned back to have a look causing Sirius to lean even further back - making them look like meerkats. Peter was gawking and Remus' head shot up, making his head rush.

Almost everyone in the hall watched as the girl with tight, sandy blonde, curly hair skipped down the rows of seating. Everyone wanted her or to be her, not like she knew that, not even noticing a single eye on her. She was laughing at something Marlene had said, both arm in arm as they approached the Hufflepuff table to wait for their other friends. Marls wore dark blue flares with a green and red, striped, corduroy crop top that had long sleeves and a square neckline, paired with black heeled boots and a matching green scarf tied over her hair. Delilah wore a light brown suede skirt with a thin black turtleneck. Her black tights were thick because the weather was nippy and her shiny black oxfords were platforms, ones she had stolen from Eleanor. The girl wore a plain black silk scarf, tied over the hair in the same way, leaving some curls to frame her face. Following behind was Lily Evans in red, white and black striped bell bottoms that were paired with a white Fleetwood Mac band t-shirt. She wore plain black Dr Martens that she had gotten for only ten pounds. Then there was El who was wearing red corduroy trousers with a dark brown shirt, that was covered in a yellow and red floral print, and had flared sleeves. She had undone the top and bottom few buttons so she could tie the shirt whilst having a v-neck. Something that suited her well. She wore the same Dr Martens as Lily because they had bought matching pairs together.

Three out of four marauders had their eye on a particular person and if the whole hall wasn't staring at the group of girls, it would have been very obvious. Since El had to deal with this everywhere she went, she taught the other three how to edge out stares because they had to deal with the paparazzi when they were with Eleanor. The only way to snap them out of their bubble would be to purposely attract their attention. Staring was nothing to the four now, especially after Milan.

Soon everyone returned back to their own lives as the group sat down to eat, joined by two other Hufflepuffs. They were the most known girls around Hogwarts, apart from Violet and her group but they were popular for completely different reasons.

"No one can be that oblivious." Peter said, turning back to face his breakfast. Remus' eyes hadn't left the girl, who seemed to radiate happiness like a beacon.

"Think our Moony has his eye on someone." Sirius commented, his eyes flickering between the two before returning to his breakfast as well, the boys all turning to see who the boy was talking about. When they saw him staring at Delilah, pinning like a lonely puppy, they weren't exactly surprised and weren't exactly sure why they looked.

"Please, he's been like this since our fourth year. I don't know why he doesn't pluck up the courage to talk to her." James spoke, finishing the last bite of his food before he ruffled up his hair, again.

"Didn't she run away last time?" Peter chimed in, also finishing his breakfast.

"Some of us don't want to end up like James Potter." Remus mumbled after putting his face into his arms. Peter almost choked on his pumpkin juice as he laughed at his statement.

"Come on, lover boy, time to go." James teased the boy, trying to brush off his comment. The boys all got up to leave, not without one last glance. Remus caught the eye of Eleanor instead of Delilah. She was watching him intently, raising a single brow: like she knew. A shudder raced down his back as she winked and turned back to the other girls as the boys exited the hall.  
  


♱

"Precisely my point." Delilah agreed with Eleanor as they clambered down to the muggle garden, located near the greenhouses. "That small circle of Slytherin's want to get rid of it though, even if it is essential for subjects like Herbology and Potions. They just despised anything without a hint of magic." The girl continued as they reached the gate. It was a slightly tattered wooden fence and the gates lock had almost rusted shut because no one had time to fix it and Delilah didn't want to set the fence on fire trying to melt the metal.

A couple of trees later and it was like they were in paradise. Eleanor gasped at the beauty of the garden and didn't expect it to look like this. Instead of being in planters, flowers of every description grew wildly. Across the floor, up the hill, along the small waterfall and even up the trees. There were tall stems of lavender that swayed above the other plants, emitting a lovely fragrance across the grounds. This whole place was Delilah's dream garden but if someone had hayfever, they would have probably stumbled into hell just by being too close. Ruby roses, sunshine sedums, pretty poppies, opal orchids and a wide patch of calla lilies were just a few flowers that grew amongst the wildlife.

In the corner of the quiet space sat a girl and an eroded easel. She was minding her own business, studying a patch of flowers that she was painting. With hazel eyes and rosy cheeks, Isadora spent most of her time on the Quidditch pitch. Much to the despise of Ms Emmell -her head of house- she had dyed her hair neon green and had gotten multiple piercings over the summer. Most of the time, Izzy kept her head down and focused on her academic career, unless Marlene dragged her out. She kept within her friendship group and was much more interested in painting than partying. That didn't mean she wasn't mischievous...

"Izzy!" Delilah called over to the girl, catching her attention away from her study. She smiled widely, her lip ring swaying as she did so. "Where have you been? I've been trying to find you all week!" She continued, pulling the girl into a light hug. Isadora wasn't exactly comfortable being touched unless she knew the person well. That's why Delilah kept her contact light and brief.

"I've been here all week and the library, OWLs are coming up and I need all the revision time I can get. I'm surprised you haven't been here, you're usually here for two hours. Everyday." Isadora replied, her Welsh accent was very thick. The girl noticed Eleanor and blinked, as if she was seeing things. She had classes with her sister Adelaide but it was still a shock to see the two at Hogwarts. In the magazines, they seemed so far from reality, living a perfect life with no care for others. Izzy had discovered in a short few days, that wasn't the truth. At least in Ada's aspect and she was in the media far more than El was.

"I've been wanting to introduce you to Eleanor." Delilah told her before turning to the blonde. "El this is Isadora Myers and Izzy this is Eleanor Westbrook." She introduced the two and they both smiled at each other, El giving the girl a small wave.

"Pleasure to meet you." Ellie said, holding her hand out for the girl to shake. Formal, like her father told her to do. Reluctantly, Isadora shook her hand.

The three spent their time chatting about various subjects as Izzy painted and the other two harvested some flowers. El had agreed to help Delilah and even stumbled across a secret. The yellow acacias.

"You know, Remus is trying to find out who is sending him these flowers." Eleanor spoke as she collected the yellow acacias at Delilah's request. The taller girl froze, her cheeks going a fiery red.

"W-What?" Delilah stuttered, facing away from the girl as she finished collecting some moss.

"Yeah, the other day, he asked me to look out for anyone carrying yellow acacias. Said people might be open around me or something." She explained examining the flowers. "Say, who has access to this garden?"

"Well, Izzy and-" She paused, not trying to give herself away.

"And you." Eleanor finished for her. "He told me that he was planning to catch the person in the act. Apparently he receives them once a month. He didn't say when, where or why but I'm sure I could guess." She continued, turning to watch Delilah - who was trying to tame her burning cheeks. "Tell me, Delilah, how are you going to avoid getting caught?" El spoke making the other girl turn towards her, shooting her a shocked look.

"Do you know about-" The brunette trailed off, stopping herself from spilling any information. Luckily for them, Isadora had left a few minutes ago to collect more paint.

"Remus, it's highly obvious. I suspect he'll be in the hospital wing by morning." She continued for her. "And you, you just gave yourself away. I mean, you told us you had a crush on him years ago. I'm sure he'd be grateful, he seemed very happy that someone cares so much to gift him these." Eleanor explained causing Delilah to facepalm out of embarrassment. It was fairly obvious, the girl wore her heart on her sleeve. The girl hadn't felt much pain in her life, she didn't have to be so closed off like Eleanor did. Sure, she felt like an outsider sometimes but overall she had had a pleasant life.

"He can't know though. That's just embarrassing. Especially if the other boys are their- oh god." She sat on the leaf covered floor. "Could you imagine that twat, James Potter, he'd be having a field day if he knew. I think Lily would have my guts too, I know she likes Remus but remember how she acted when I told you all that I liked him. It was like I fell in love with the Devil."

"Lily just cares about us. She doesn't want you to get hurt. She is the mother of our group after all." Eleanor said, Delilah let out a soft laugh, thinking of all the times she had gotten the four of them out of trouble and then proceeded to tell them off herself. "I don't think it's Remus, I just think it's boys in general. You are the baby of the group and Lily would brew a storm before she let you get hurt."

"Your right, you still can't tell her about this though. What am I supposed to do then? I can't possibly go to the hospital wing if he's expecting someone. What if he's expecting Violet?" She expressed but only confused Eleanor.

"Who? If I don't know them, they're not competition." Eleanor told her confidently, Delilah simply shook her head with a smile knowing that Ellie completely meant that. _If only she knew,_ Delilah thought. "I have a great idea anyway, let's make our own trap." She added with a smirk.  
  


♱

Curfew was much earlier at Hogwarts then it was back at Beauxbatons. They ate around nine or ten o'clock there but here they ate at five or six on the weekends. So having to be in their dorms by ten was something that Eleanor was still getting used to. Even after curfew at Beauxbatons, the students could wander the corridors but were banned from going outside. Here they had to be in their common rooms and Eleanor didn't exactly understand why.

Currently, Eleanor sat on the sofa with Lily by her side as the moon came over the horizon. They weren't the only ones in there, it was mostly full of students studying or doing homework before classes on Monday or others during the week. El knew that she wouldn't get much sleep that night, she never did on a full moon. So, she used this time to her advantage and began to do her Transfiguration work. She had the most of that, Professor McGonagall had the highest workload and Professor Slughorn set the least, he tended to forget. Apparently he hadn't set the class a single assignment the whole academic year. That was fine with Eleanor, she much preferred her own revision to writing essay after essay like Mcgonagall wanted. In her first week, she had two scrolls to write, one for transfiguration and one for Alchemy. Ms Emmell already had a strong disliking for the girl but Eleanor was used to having hate at this point.

A small pellet of light zipped past her eyes and continued to circle her head. She plucked the bead of light out the air and a note was revealed in her hand. This was something El and her friends had made to get messages to each other fast. It travelled at the speed of light and only the sender and the receiver could read the message. The whole communication had taken them two years to master but it was worth it. She unravelled the note and it read:   
'Eleanor, Céline est bien pire. Nous avons plus que jamais besoin de vous. Elle est devenue impitoyable depuis votre départ, nous avons besoin de votre chanson. Vous nous manquez tous et nous avons hâte de vous voir cet été. Tout mon amour, Emma. [Eleanor,  
Celine is much worse. We need you more than ever. She's become ruthless since you left, we need your singing. We all miss you and look forward to seeing you this summer. All my Love, Emma.]' Her eyes pricked with tears, she missed her friends dearly and hated that she couldn't help anymore. Unfortunately, Eleanor had missed the past three moons meaning Celine would be struggling to stay calm. The girl tore off a piece of parchment and wrote back some tips for the girl. They probably wouldn't see it, the moon was already up back in France but it would help next month. She walked over to the window and with a flick of her wand, the orb went shooting through the night air. 

However, what Eleanor didn't expect was to see three boys running across the grounds carrying a limp figure in their arms. They were heading straight towards the large tree that Eleanor was told to avoid. One boy completely shrunk and the large tree stopped swaying. The three disappeared into the trunk, leaving Eleanor speechless. 

♱  
  


The night was a rough one for all the boys. It was supposed to be a night of exploring Hogsmeade to find out where the last tunnel went. Unfortunately, Remus had to be returned back to the shack when he almost attacked a young couple that got lost after a night at the three broomsticks.

That had landed three out of four boys in the hospital wing, temporarily. Peter had a broken wrist and James had received a rather nasty gash across his chest. Leaving Sirius the only one without any serious damage, he had a few cuts and bruises but he had to obliviate the couple as he was the only one good enough to do memory charms. A little white bird had saved the boys from obtaining too much damage and sent Remus to sleep with its whistle.

He had returned to the dorms to change after his clothes had been torn. What was unusual was the figure asleep on the scarlet sofa. Yes, students came out here on occasion but the fire would still be roaring and the sofa would be drowning in pillows and blankets. But this person had curled themselves up into a ball in the pitch black, the only reason he noticed was because of the little light circling their body. He saw the layers of blonde hair and knew exactly who it was, he had seen her sitting there earlier with Lily when they had snuck out under James' invisibility cloak. To be honest, the boy was utterly confused as to why she was sleeping down here at all and was curious about orb circling her. _Maybe it's a protection charm_ , he thought.

The boy tested his chances and decided to wake her up, luckily for him nothing backfired. Her eyes fluttered open so swiftly, it was like she hadn't been sleeping at all. Flinging her legs off the sofa, she sat up, taking in her surroundings. She squinted lightly when she saw the boy, trying to figure out who it was.

"Sirius?" She said quizzically, rubbing her eyes to check she was actually awake. Her voice was quiet, even in the common room's silence. Through the darkness, she saw his lips pull into a small smile, one that she reciprocated with realising. "What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing." He said, raising his brow at her causing the blonde to shake her head at him. "I had to take Remus to the Hospital wing, he wasn't feeling well." He explained, she nodded at him dismissively and he thought he was in the clear. The boy started to head towards his dorm when he froze on the spot.

"Is that why your clothes look like they've been ravaged by a pack of wolves?" She asked him, facing the wall as she stood up - needing to reply to her friends back home.

"I don't know what you mean." He acted dumb but he knew it was no use, the girl had such an attention to detail, he was surprised she didn't mention it when she first saw him. Unless, that was her plan all along, to get some sort of truth out of him. Remus had mentioned the look that Eleanor gave him but the boys had played it off as nothing.

"Seems implausible you would face such a thing just going to the hospital wing." Eleanor continued, completely blanking his attempt to escape. She grabbed the orb and unfolded the note, sitting by the window and reading it. The girl got her quill and parchment, replying instantly and sending it off. "Where are the other two? Are they getting treated too?" She asked, putting her stuff away. Sirius clenched his jaw, not wanting to spill anything to her. It could be a mind game after all. She could know nothing. For someone bad at lying, she had a very good poker face.

"No, they're sitting with Remus. Making sure he doesn't get worse." He told her and she hummed in acknowledgement. Finally turning to face him, she walked closer to him, stopping right outside the girls steps. With one last glance she disappeared. He let out a breath of air, he needed to get back and tell them.

"Oh, I was watching this tree earlier." Her voice interrupted his thoughts once more. "It was swaying in the wind and suddenly froze when three figures were close by. Strange, don't you think?"  
  


♱

A few hours and a nap later, the three boys were lounging around their best friend's bed discussing the problem that is Eleanor Westbrook. Each of them had varying opinions on the situation and they were all wondering if she knew. If she did, how did she figure it out so quickly and did she tell anyone.

"She hardly knows me, what's keeping her from telling everyone. Do you know who her father is?" Remus expressed out of pure fear, the uncertainty was not good for his already slow recovery.

"Yes, I have and yet she's still friends with Evans. She is clearly not like him." James was the one that came to the girls defence.

"But Muggleborns and werewolves are very different things." Peter inputted making Remus slide under his covers. James glared at him whilst Sirius stayed mute.

"You know her best, what do you think?" The bespectacled boy asked, catching Sirius' attention. He raised a questioning brow at his best friend, not really knowing himself. That's when the sound of the doors opening made them all jump out of their seats. Potter grabbed his cloak and the three boys huddled together so the cloak covered them. The fourth boy pretended to sleep in the bed, two voices chatted friendly amongst themselves, a beautiful laugh lighting up the drizzly Sunday morning. James nodded his head towards the doors, slipping through the curtain to see who it was. The three froze at the sight. Eleanor stood there, chatting to Madame Pomfrey, with a bunch of yellow acacias clasped in her left hand and a box of chocolates in the other. She turned around, looking straight at the three like she knew they were there. Staring Sirius in the eyes before disappearing to deliver the presents to the sandy haired boy.

"I'm sorry, Remus." She whispered, placing the items down on his bedside table as she evaluated his condition. "I know. It's not my secret to know but I could tell the day I met you." She told the sleeping boy as his eyes flickered softly, as if he was dreaming. "The chocolate's from me, it'll make you feel better. But the flowers, I'm sworn to secrecy about that one." Eleanor laughed lightly to herself. "I know you're awake by the way. Everything's easy to figure out when you know what to look for." She added as his eyes opened to look at the kind girl.

"How would chocolate help?" He asked, his voice rather hoarse and groggy. The statement made her laugh but he still looked rather confused.

"Out of everything you could have asked, that was your go to." She pointed out, a weak smile formed on his face. "Get some rest." El told him, placing the flowers into the empty vase before walking away. "Oh and Remus." The boy hummed, turning to look at her. "I would never tell anybody." Eleanor told him and his whole demeanour seemed to settle but deep down the boy was still unsure.  
  



	5. manipulator

  
  


**_HOGWARTS WAS A_** much more vibrant atmosphere compared to Adelaide's old school. From the common rooms to lessons, everything was very different and the girl definitely preferred it here. Although she loved her friends back at home, they were just so different from her. Most of them had more in common with her sister then Ada and it worked for sisters, just having a few similar interests, but it didn't really work for friends. Where both sisters loved reading, Eleanor preferred the classics that their mother used to read to them, Adelaide preferred non-fiction books that she studied with their father. The two grew up under the same roof yet had very different experiences. Even though their experiences and their personalities were completely different, the two dressed the same and were practically identical. Both of them knew how to read people, how to get what they wanted, they knew how to get inside people's heads - something that the girls secretly loved doing- but Ellie could do more inexplicable actions then Ada, which was confusing since they were taught how to do these things together. Adelaide wondered if their mother taught the blonde more, it was highly plausible.

The Westbrook's were truly a mystery to the world, the people knew what their father wanted them to know. Until this Summer, of course. Adelaide had never seen her father so angered in her life. You see, Eleanor had exposed something about the family that she didn't even know herself but when the information was spread to the right person, it threatened to destroy everything their father had built. That's why they fled, he knew exactly what could save the family.

Where Eleanor was forced into academic subjects like potions and transfiguration, her father had no problem letting Ada do things alongside those subjects like divinations and astrology. Things that Adelaide was actually passionate about. She knew El would never question it though, all she wanted to do was impress their father but it never seemed to work, not whilst the girl was so keen on music, fashion and modelling. All influenced by their mother but they were the only things that kept Eleanor happy anymore. Like she was struggling to keep the connection between herself and their mother alive. Adelaide could see it clearly, she felt so guilty just sitting and watching the war unfold between her family because she loved them all so dearly. Only Eleanor seemed to come out hurt, just wanting someone to understand but deep down Adelaide couldn't. Everyday, she was filled with guilt but deep down she didn't really care. She would look back at family photos and a tear would roll down her face but deep down she felt nothing. When her mothers death was announced, she felt nothing and that had haunted her ever since but she still didn't feel the pain of loss. She had watched her sister lose everything in mere seconds, nothing had changed for her. Not really. Not for a long time anyway. Slowly, she got that motherly connection with Annabeth and finally started to understand El. At the same time, Eleanor had began to drift. She spent all of her time out of the home, either with her friends in France or those from England, and only returned when their father needed to show off Eleanor for some prestigious event. It was strange because they spent everyday together at Beauxbatons, never leaving each other's side but when they were home El was a complete stranger. The same thing had happened here, the blonde had come to see her sister every evening but it felt like everything had changed...  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


For as long as Ada could remember, she had to take medication for Narcolepsy, a medicine her father had invented just for her. Apparently he didn't want it on the market due to the use of rare wizarding plants. Nobody actually knew what was in those pills but they worked, she had never felt drowsy during the day and became sleepy at around ten o'clock. She had never forgotten to take them, thanks to her fear of falling asleep in public. Her pill bottle would refill once it was empty so she never ran out, her father made sure of it.

It was never a problem for her, she had taken them since she was four. She couldn't remember much before that point, she figured that she was sleeping often. The girl wasn't even in the family photos between one and four, she believed that's why she lacked a relationship with her mother because she was sleeping all the time as a child. Those first few years are essential for bond making and she sometimes cursed her father for not making them sooner. Everything could have been different...

Adelaide stared into the mirror after pulling on her white turtleneck, a plaid tank and a pair of black flared jeans. The reflection staring back at her felt foreign, it always had. In this particular moment, she felt like she was repeating herself. She missed her younger self when she was so clueless. Everyday, she realised more about her life then she wanted to. Like all the times their father had criticised her sister but praised her for the same thing. All the times Eleanor had taken the fall for her and to this day Adelaide had never done anything to repay her, she had only added more stress to the struggling girl. Yet the voice in her head told her not to worry, El was strong, she never tumbled. That's what everyone thought about the blonde. Eleanor is fine, she is strong, she smiles through her pain. As long as she looked happy, they believed she could carry on, no matter the situation. Adelaide was the most guilty of this, she idolised her older sister then blamed her when everything went wrong. Sure, it was excusable when she was a child but she hadn't grown out of that habit, especially since her father sided with her every time...  
  
  
  


_"Ellie, dear, what are you doing?" The sweet voice of their mother called out, hurrying over to the young blonde. She had gotten into their mothers art supplies and was drawing on random sheets of paper. As their mother used pencils, she often sharpened them with a blade instead of a pencil sharpener because it was more accurate for her own usage. So when she stumbled across her daughter trying to copy her, her heart almost collapsed._

_"I'm being you!" A young Eleanor replied, barely avoiding her palm as she continued to chip away at the wood. The blade balanced on the edge of the table as she went on to colour her page a violet crimson shade._

_"That is so dangerous, Eleanor!" Their mother scolded, marching over to the table but before she could get there, her worst nightmare came true as the little blonde reached up to grab the blade. Instead of grabbing the handle, she knocked the sharp edge into her palm, letting out a soul crushing screech as it sliced open her palm. The older woman had never heard such an impactful scream, like it could rip her apart. Thankfully, she was just a child, that meant her power was low. That could change, that would change._

_The pencil was replaced with blood as it oozed out of her hand, a thick pool already forming on her lavender dress. Florence's eyes went wide, frozen in a moment of panic. She rushed over to her daughter, who was cradling her small hand as tears began to pour down her chubby face, and picked her up to go and fix her hand. The woman placed the little girl on the sink as she examined the wound. As she took a closer look, she jolted back as a shot of electricity made her dizzy. Her head flickered back to Eleanor -who was hunched over in fear- and her hands were glowing in an orb shape and were a golden shade. Just like her mother._

_"Florence!" The voice of Eleanor's father called causing the orbs to fade. "Where are you? What's going on?" He called after them, another scream coming from outside the door. The woman pulled out her wand, cleaning up the pools of blood before she could plant the stitches._

_"In here!" She informed and the door opened very slowly, as if he was expecting the worst. Flora held a kind smile, she always did, no matter how scared she was. She put others first, no matter what. The man stood in the doorway, staring the two down in disappointment as the stitches flew into El's hand._

_"How foolish. I told you not to do such things in front of the girl. Unlike Adelaide, she ends up in trouble." He spat as the fourth member of the Westbrook family joined them in the bathroom. Ada's eyes flickered from the two, to her father, and then back at her reflection. "That's going to leave a scar, you should be glad that wasn't on your face. You wouldn't get very far in life." The man continued, sprouting his usual hatred to his own daughter._

_"Conan!" Florence shouted, very unlike the woman to do so. Her face had contorted into one of anger, not wanting to believe the words that had just come out of her husband's mouth. "Get out. We'll talk about this later." She said sternly, the man rolled his eyes like a teenage boy in trouble and walked away, most likely back to his office. She turned back to the blonde, smiling weakly at her even though Eleanor looked like her whole world had crumbled. She wasn't even six yet and already knew more pain than most adults. "Hey, hey. Look at me. He didn't mean it, he's just very stressed." Flora calmed the crying child, wiping her tears for her. Even Eleanor knew she was lying, she had been working on studying body language and so far was catching on pretty quickly. That was the only thing that seemed to make their father proud, when it came to Eleanor that is. Staring at her reflection, a bubble of guilt brewing in Ada's stomach at the mere hatred that her father exuded but she didn't really understand._   
  
  


Looking back on it, she did understand now. That's why she never blamed her mother for spending so much time with Eleanor, every second of the day she needed protecting from her fathers harsh ways. Florence tried her hardest to shield her daughter but it was never enough. When she died, their father never said a word to the girl. Acting like she didn't even exist. There was no wonder why Eleanor started acting out, Adelaide knew she would do the exact same in her position. The whole world wanted the blondes attention but she was fixated on the one that didn't. He was supposed to though; as her father, Conan was supposed to protect her, not cause her the most grief. Once he had an opinion, there was nothing in this world that could change his mind. Not even being his daughter gave you immunity from his choices and feelings. It was him against the world, like he had never really grown up.

"Addie!" A voice called from outside the bathroom door, pulling the girl out of her thoughts. She shook her head and sighed, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. It was Sunday meaning the day would be a calm one. The girl loved quiet days, she hardly got one at home. "Okay, so me and the girls had this idea to go to the old divination's room, they still have all the stuff up there if you want to come. I know how much you love all that stuff, we even found a pack of ancient tarot cards up there!" Clementine expressed, her voice trailing away as she ventured towards her bed.

"Yeah sounds good. I didn't think Emmeline would be into it." Adelaide answered her friend, the two had instantly hit it off. Clementine had acted as if they had been friends for years which made everything a little bit easier for the Westbrook. Back at Beauxbatons, all her friends had been purebloods meaning she didn't have to talk to others at the balls like Eleanor had to. So she knew no one. Thankfully, she got put in a dorm with Clem and everything spiralled from there.

"She loves it there, we found it accidentally in second year -and Emmeline's third year- because Emma had divinations and we went to the wrong turret. I'm pretty sure she has drawn everything in that room." Clementine told her, grabbing her jumper from the four poster bed. What Ada had noticed about Clem in the past few days was that she was very into skirts and dresses. She wore two pink clips in her hair, one magenta and the other fuchsia. Her outfits were always paired with a cardigan or a knitted jumper. The complete opposite to Ada's style, she much preferred a darker colour scheme and jeans. Of course, she wore the occasional skirt like when she arrived here but they weren't necessarily her favourite. "Are you ready to go?" The girl asked, pulling her hair out from under the fabric. With a nod, Clem grabbed the girl's hand and she began to run through the common room, barely avoiding people as the two exited the dungeons.

"Why are we running?!" Adelaide called to the girl in front who was giggling to herself. They turned down random corridors, places Adelaide had never seen before.

"Because we're going to be late!" She called back, tugging on the girls arm to hurry her along. To Ada, this moment was inexplicable. The girl didn't quite understand the feeling she had, it was like a mix of nerves, euphoria, thrill and excitement; all swirling in her stomach, threatening to explode. It was as if she was out of body for a moment, watching Clem's cinnamon hair sway as she ran and her bright smile seemed to spark a flame inside her. Everything about the moment was confusing, they were just running but Adelaide seemed to have this battle going on inside her mind.

It all came to stop as their bodies collided, stopping outside the entrance of the old classroom. Clem pulled out her wand and unlocked the hatch, bringing down the ladders with it. Adelaide went up first, checking out the unknown room. It looked well used, not a speck of dust laid on the table or chairs. A single sheet covered the windows, letting in a murky glow. She did a B-line to the shelves where a deck of tarot cards sat, freshly dusted off and tempting her to use.

As she wandered back to the table with a deck of tarot cards in hand, she sat opposite Clementine as their friends climbed the ladder to join them. Stretch marks rippled down her thighs in beautiful spirals, her thighs were wide and so was her waist, giving her a more rectangular figure. She was just above average in height, about five foot seven which made her appear thinner then she actually was. Emma was as alluring as a greek goddess, her features lined up so perfectly with them. Her skin was a warm tawny brown that highlighted her light chestnut eyes. Thanks to her father, she had received a hooked nose which made her unique. Always carrying a sketch book, the Ravenclaw was working on something new. Unlike the other three, Emmeline was in her sixth year and wasn't a big fan of Ada, something just didn't sit right with her about the girl. Up until now, Emma's initial impression had been correct which ultimately is never a good thing. 

Irish born, Caoimhe had a thick Derry accent. Her hair was thin and wavy and a strawberry blonde. Face full of freckles and blush very prominent on her cheeks, she spent most of her time with Emmeline and Clementine; usually sculpting. The two had become friends through the muggle art club even though they were roommates. She was one of the best at potions and had made her way into the Slug club. Being one of his favourite students, on par with Lily Evans. However, she wasn't a fan of the subject, like most of the wizarding subjects. She did enjoy ancient runes, though. Unlike her best friend, she hadn't made up her mind on the new Westbrook and decided to give her a chance.

Adelaide sat there shuffling the deck of tarot cards, watching the three greet each other. Her eyes were fixated on Emma's hands as she pulled Clem into a hug. So trained on them that she had to shake her head to snap herself out of it, she didn't know why it bothered her so much, she hardly knew the girl. Maybe it was just her protective instincts because a small part of Clem reminded the girl of her childhood best friend. But then again, she hadn't known this girl long and was likely to be her repressed emotions acting up, again.

Pulling out three cards from the deck, she slowly laid them down in front of her, careful of what she will draw. She examined each of them carefully, recollecting on what they each meant. From what she saw, these weren't equating to anything good...

**_Lovers, reversed. Hanged man. Moon._ **   
  
  


  
  
  



	6. pamela jinky

**_THE NEXT TWO_** weeks passed by quicker then Eleanor had hoped. It was the last day of lessons for this half term and Halloween was only two days away. Marlene was more excited than ever because it was her favourite holiday, the same as Sirius and James. They had been given the week out of lessons, although they had ten or so assignments to complete over this time. So Lily had forced the group to do them the day they got them and Eleanor was quite thankful for her persistent nagging. That means she only had one more essay to write, which she was doing tonight, and had a whole week to do nothing. Her favourite thing to do. Nothing. She couldn't wait to just sleep. The girl had been studying hard, working out and the three girls started to practice their music together, all the while she was lacking sleep. One factor was that her body still wasn't used to getting up so earlier, she much preferred sleeping till one pm and going to sleep at four am. Another factor was her overly loud thoughts, with each day that passed that anxious bubble became increasingly more violent. When night came, she was alone with her demons and they scared her more than anything could, not even Voldemort was comparable to her own thoughts.

All seven girls had headed down to breakfast together, meeting Delilah, Isadora and Marlene on the way. As the marauders chatted together, excited that they had a full week to cause mayhem amongst the students. They only noticed the girls had entered the hall upon hearings El's laugh, it was hard to go unnoticed by anyone. The group of Hufflepuff's had decided to sit with them, sitting on the side closest to their table whilst the other four took the other side.

"Good morning!!" Eleanor greeted cheerfully, using the boys' shoulders to sit between James and Sirius. A waft of cologne: ginger, cedar wood and amber formed the main scents of the very familiar smell, one that made her face light up immediately.

There was a grumble in response from James, like every morning he was stuffing his face with bacon, Remus was too busy staring at a certain Hufflepuff, and Peter was rushing to finish their potions assignment. That left only one boy that she could talk to, for now. She was lowkey thankful. Since that night at the astronomy tower, they hadn't been alone together which was very unusual for the two. From the day they met, the two only spent time together, alone. It was weird but she enjoyed all the boys' company. Plus, El didn't want to raise any brows by requesting to be with him alone. Getting to know them all was interesting, Eleanor had never met a group like the self proclaimed 'marauders'. She still wasn't over that, it was completely ridiculous to her but she never said anything about it.

One thing Eleanor had noticed about Hogwarts was its clear hierarchy. It was a common thing in most schools, something she swore to stay away from when they moved from France. Each house had it's well known groups. Unfortunately for Eleanor, all her friends seemed to reside at the top. Some for good reasons, others not so much. Another thing she had noticed was the tension between the houses. Especially Slytherin and Gryffindor which was incomprehensible to the blonde due to the very close similarities between all the houses.

"Fancied sitting with us for once?" Sirius replied with a boyish smile, she thought that she would melt on the spot but she pulled herself together, returning the bright gesture. Ever since she got here, that churning feeling in her stomach hadn't disappeared like it usually did in his presence and she contemplated the fact that something may be wrong with her. Scratch that, she knew something was wrong with her but that was unrelated to her current predicament.

"Yes, I came here to talk about you, actually." She said, grabbing herself a pain au chocolat and she took a large bite out of the delicious pastry. His face lit up with excitement as his lip pulled into a small smirk.

"I knew you couldn't resist me, Westbrook." He replied with a charming hair flick. The girl rolled her eyes sarcastically, letting out a small laugh too. Deep down, she knew he was right, not like she'd ever admit that. The thought of rejections scared her as much as thunderstorms did.

"You wish." She said, poking his side as they both laughed together. Almost as if no one else was around, they giggled at the unspoken words.

"Hang on. Am I missing something here?" James decided to interrupt, watching the two in their close proximity, sharing a secret look with one another. They shared a whisper and Eleanor quickly swivelled to face the bespectacled boy. A matching smirk with his best friend, hinting that he was correct.

"Yes, Potter. The usage of your brain." Ellie told him, tapping the boy condescendingly. At that, Remus practically snorted out his pumpkin juice as everyone began to giggle around them.

"How dare you. I'll have you know, I got E's and O's on my OWLs." He bragged to the girl, a mock look of offence plastered on his face. What Eleanor did know was these boys loved their dramatics more than Marlene.

"Yeah because Lily forced you to study." Marlene chimed in from the other end of their group, Lily had only agreed to sit with them on the bases that she sat as far away from James as possible. "Or you were just pretending, so you could spend more time w-" A quick boot to the leg had silenced the girl as she let out a small yelp. Something told the blonde that there was more to that story than simple studying. That was based off of Lily's bright red face, James' cocky smirk and the low giggles from Sirius. Seemingly, that distracted the group and didn't question James' statement as they bickered between themselves instead.

A wave of relief washed over Eleanor as she turned back to the food. Yet those metallic eyes were so obviously observing her, he said nothing but was looking for a reaction. Something to indicate her thoughts on what James randomly sprung up on them. He was quite obviously stirring the pot, not like anyone had realised except him. Not like Sirius even knew but he would definitely get back at him soon. El's face was swiftly becoming as fiery as Lily's hair and heat seemed to radiate off her complexion because she knew that he was watching her.

"Anyways." She said, taking a moment to calm herself. The group had returned to their usual chatter as Marlene won their bickering match, like usual. "What we did come here to talk about is your plans for Halloween." Eleanor told the boys, her eyes scanning each of their faces, they all lit up into large smirks.

"Well, dear Eleanor." James began dramatically, throwing his arm over shoulder and pulling her closer. "We are throwing the best Halloween party that you have ever been too." He declared proudly.

"I don't know about that one." She replied, earning a snicker off Marlene and Lily, since Delilah was too busy daydreaming. "You have some strong competition." El told them, standing up to leave since she had potions early that morning. Lily followed suit, wishing farewell to the other girls and joining the blonde. They walked off arm in arm, down the rows of students.

"Don't you worry, Ella, you have never been to one of our parties." She heard Sirius call after her, Eleanor turned her head to see them all wearing the same smug expression. Simply, rolling her eyes at them, the boys started to brainstorm.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  


"Good morning, Dorcas!" Ellie called to the Slytherin in a tone far too joyful for a morning. The girl wasn't usually this lively in the morning but she was so ready for a break. She had only been there a month! Although Dorcas was still closed off, Eleanor was slowly getting to know her. So, she simply acted as if she was her best friend which really helped Dorcas open up more.

"You're very lively this morning." She commented, not even looking up from her notes but the blonde could see the bright smile on her face. Her glasses kept slipping off her nose, making her push them up every minute.

"Why wouldn't I be?" She asked rhetorically, sliding into her seat next to her. "I get to sleep in for the next week, plus Halloween is right around the corner!" Eleanor explained, pulling out her water bottle, notebook, ink and quill before turning back to her.

"You like Halloween?" Dorcas quizzed curiously, she had never done anything to celebrate the holiday and didn't know what the whole fuss was about.

"It's the one night a year that I can be something else." Eleanor confessed as the rest of the students filed through the door. The girl beside her frowned lightly, she had read about the Westbrook family in the daily prophet. She was everything that Dorcas wanted to be.

"Why would you, of all people, want to be someone else?" She asked, almost hysterical, it's sometimes hard to remember that others are suffering. Especially someone like Eleanor. People can be so idealistic that they believe anything they read, even Ellie was beginning to believe her own lies. Her eyes flickered to the brunette who was already staring at her with a quizzical look. Eleanor let out an exacerbated sigh before smiling at her, knowing the exact thoughts that were flowing through her head. 'Little rich girl with the perfect life and family, what could be so wrong in her life?' And overall, she knew her financial situation helped her tremendously -that's why she loved to gift as much as possible- but that didn't equate to her happiness. If only her family didn't make it on the front page, be the centre of attention, her father treated her fairly and all the lies weren't spouted daily; then maybe she could find some happiness.

"Sometimes life isn't what it seems." She confessed, turning to write the workload that was piling up on the blackboard. This statement only seemed to intrigue Dorcas more as her face contorted into a deep frown. "You should come." Eleanor suggested, noticing the girls spiral of interest in her previous statement.

"I don't think that would be a very good idea. Slytherin and Gryffindor don't tend to mingle." Dorcas tried to explain but El just let out a soft laugh, shaking her head at the ludicrous house divides.

"Oh shut up." Eleanor said, rolling her eyes jokingly. "Besides, Ada and her friend are coming. You can bring Edith, I would love to meet her." She told her. Although Dorcas talked about the Higgs girl, Eleanor had never seen her. The two were pretty hard to track down, usually with the animals or in the greenhouses, so they only talked in potions and occasionally in Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"I'll ask her about it. Is it a costume party?" She inquired, as they went to collect their items for their potion.

"I presume so. I'll ask the boys later." Ellie said as they both returned to their table, ready to get to work. Last year, she had done really well in potions because she had found her mothers old book -she was amazing at potions- but she had seemed to have packed it in the wrong bag. So, Dorcas was left to do most of the measuring and cutting whilst El did the wand work and mixed the potion. Charms had been a strong suit of hers since she was first taught as a child.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The day had passed slowly but they were now in their last lesson, learning about nonverbal spells. Something she had mastered a long time ago. The girl sat on the desks, watching as people attempted them for the first time. Alongside her was the marauders, all watching the group of classmates too smugly for Eleanor's liking. James and Sirius leaned on the wall, the latter by her side, whilst Peter sat by her -dangling his legs over the side- and Remus propped himself up on Peter's left.

"What's so funny, Black." She asked with a raised brow. His eyes instantly shot down to hers with a twinkle in those hypnotic eyes. "Aren't you supposed to be showing off or something?" El proceeded making him laugh lightly, one that made her face light up.

"Dearest Ella, we're waiting till the end. Got to be a show stopper." He said looking between the other three boys that had matching smirks.

"I am one hundred percent convinced that you've practised that." El replied, shuffling to the end of the table. "I can just imagine you all sitting in a circle trying to get a perfect smirk." She added, grabbing her wand as she stood up.

"And why would we do that?" James asked, frowning at her statement.

"You have nothing better to do." She shot back causing James to feign distress and obviously he wasn't subtle about it. The bespectacled boy leaned his weight on Sirius and the two toppled over, landing in a big heap on the floor. Instantly breaking into a squabble, the two were rolling around on the floor wrestling like brothers. Eleanor couldn't help but burst into a fit of giggles at the sight, the joyful sound catching the attention of others who then watched their fight. Peter cheered them on whilst Remus rolled his eyes, a smile still pulled onto his lips.

"Mr Black, Mr Potter, Miss Westbrook!" The high pitched squeal of their teacher, Professor Jinky, silenced the room as everyone turned to look at the pompous woman. "How dare you interrupt my lesson with such foolery!" She exclaimed as the two boys shot up at either side of Eleanor, all three were trying their best to hide their smiles but it was useless. "What is so funny! This is a serious lesson."

"Sorry, Pamela." Sirius started, the mischievous glint reflected on both boys' faces.

"But this lesson is excruciatingly boring." James finished for the two, earning a snicker off Remus and Peter followed by a dramatic gasp from their professor.

"Detention!" She shrieked, obviously offended by his comment. Eleanor had never met someone with such a short fuse. It was comical really. The girl shook her head at the two, ready to sit back down. "You too, Miss Westbrook." Jinky spat, eyeing the girl intently. 

Since she walked into that classroom, Professor Jinky did not like her. As if she knew something that Eleanor didn't. "Now, come show the class how to do a nonverbal spell because you know so much not to participate." She huffed, clearing the space for the blonde with a wicked smile clouding her wrinkled features.

Eleanor gripped the rose handle of the maple wood wand firmly as she stepped forward, glaring at the black haired boy who winked at her. She faced the iron cast statue that was used for practising spells on before her eyes looked to her teacher.

"Now... you are, I believe, a complete novice in the use of nonverbal spells. What is the advantage of a nonverbal spell?"

"Your opponent doesn't know what kind of magic you are about to use." Eleanor replied confidently and Jinky hummed. "What spell am I doing?" She questioned, prepared for the worst.

"I have had everyone do flipendo, all unsuccessfully. May as well let you try." Jinky spoke in a tone so venomously that even Eleanor questioned her ability. With a sharp nod, the girl took a few steps back and sucked in a deep breath, knowing the amount of pressure on her. Not to prove Jinky wrong but to prove herself. A few whispers started to brew as Eleanor focused on her target. "Whenever you're ready." Their teacher spoke, far too giddy for the girls liking.

One swish of her wand and the iron clade dummy went soaring into the wall, falling into multiple pieces. A sudden silence washed over the group: it was one thing to do a nonverbal spell but to do one with far more power then when done verbally was something beyond belief, especially without an alder wood wand. Everyone's eyes immediately flashed to the blonde who was elated with satisfaction, a smile so precious that the heavens opened for her to sit amongst the angels. It was hard not to fall for Eleanor, especially when she was supposed to be a friend. Whilst everyone thought of it as an excellent achievement for the girl, she couldn't wait to tell her father the news, in hopes of getting a simple 'well done'.

Lily ran over and engulfed the girl in a hug, sending the two back a couple of steps. Slightly confused, the blonde hugged her back tightly as more people seemed to crowd them.

"That was unbelievable!" She expressed, pulling away to face her. "You have to teach me." Lily added in a whisper as if magic was prohibited. Eleanor laughed lightly, agreeing to do so one day. Before she could turn to her other friends, Jinky had started to clear everyone out of the classroom in a fit of embarrassment, including the girls.

"Oh, Miss Westbrook." She called after her, making her spin on the spot. The group of Gryffindors slowed their pace to overhear the conversation. "That was quite a bit of magic you did there. Was that something you learned at Beauxbatons?" Jinky quizzed, very obviously feigning a friendly tone.

"No, professor, I taught myself." Eleanor replied and the elderly woman let out an obnoxious 'ha' as if that was completely ludicrous.

"I'm sorry, my dear, but someone like _you_ does not just teach themselves something like that." The emphasis on the 'you' really caught Eleanor off guard causing the girl to tense. Her fingers wrapped into a fist as Eleanor glared so darkly at Jinky that she visibly gulped.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She spat, taking a step closer to the woman who was staring so fearsome into El's eyes that one may believe they had changed colour and she had sprouted fangs. Almost like a predator stalking its prey, she crept forward. One thing Eleanor had been taught by her father was never to be undermined by anyone. Even him.

"Ella." A voice said from behind followed by a warm hand wrapped around her upper arm, tugging her lightly. What the girl had failed to notice was that Jinky had drawn her wand, ready to attack at any moment. With one last glare, she turned on her heel and headed towards the exit. Everyone instantly cleared a path for the girl who seemed to be steaming. Her footsteps were harsh, slapping the cold stone floor.

"The audacity of that woman!" Eleanor started, the redhead had seen her best friend angry nine times over the last sixteen years and it never ended well. She had to jog to keep up with the tall girls' fast pace, the boys tailing them closely but giving them space. "Someone like you." She repeated, shaking her head as she headed towards their common room. "Like what is that supposed to mean? I have been nothing but nice to her, but no. Absolute lunatic, if you ask me. Honestly, what has to go wrong in your life to hate a student." Ellie continued, not knowing if she wanted to punch something or cry. On top of that, the amount of work was piling, Adelaide hadn't talked to her in a week, her father hadn't sent anything to her after being sorted and the anniversary of her mothers death was swiftly approaching. The boys had another idea. Swooping to either side of the girl, Sirius and James both threw their arms over her shoulder, making her feel small for once.

"You know what helps cheer me up, Ella." Sirius was the first to speak as they guided the group towards the courtyard.

"No. Please enlighten me." She replied through gritted teeth, although her whole demeanour seemed to have relaxed a little.

"Well, a prank, of course." James chimed in, a small smile breaking to the surface of her frustrated features. 

"Nope." Lily quickly interjected with a harsh tone. "I refuse to let you drag her along, just to make everything worse!"

"There, there. Lilypad. It can only get worse if you get caught." James replied with a smirk, flashing his brows up and down.

"You are so full of yourself! When do you not get caught?" The redhead exclaimed rhetorically.

"When I don't tell others about it." He answered, unsurprisingly to the others. Lily, however, was not amused like Eleanor was as she narrowed her eyes at the boy - he was about three words away from her pulling out her wand and hexing him into oblivion.

"So are you in or not?" Sirius asked the girl under his arm. 

"Sure. Why not." She answered, shrugging her shoulders lightly and his face instantly lit up. He grabbed James by the collar, pulling him away before he ended up in the black lake and started to sprint away with him.

"Meet us outside the hall, twenty minutes before dinner." The long haired boy called over his shoulder and then proceeded to beckon the other two boys.

"What do you think they're planning?" She quizzed Remus who had joined her side.

"I'm not sure but trouble calls." He answered, patting the girls shoulder before chasing after them.

"Peter."

"Yes, El." He answered with a kind smile.

"Make it the worst you have." She replied, making him smirk. The boy nodded and followed after his friends, a swirl of pranks flowing through his mind. Turning towards her best friend, she saw the pointed look that she was being given. "Don't look at me like that."

"You're deflecting, again. Fighting fire with fire never works." Lily told her.

"Come on, how could this day get any worse." Eleanor replied, rolling her eyes. In many ways, she knew it could. And it would.

♱

"Nice one, James!" Sirius called as they rounded the corner, running from Jinky's office after bugging -quite literally- the whole room. All they had to do was wait. A few seconds later and a scream erupted in the vacant hallway followed by loud footsteps.

"Get it off me! Get it off me!" Jinky squirmed, trying to shake the thousands of bugs that had been permanently stuck to her. It was hard to hold back their laughs, even through muffled hands. What really set them off was when the bugs spread onto Filch. "Who's there?" She demanded and the five of them took that as their que to run. They didn't stop until they sat down with their friends at the table, the feast had just begun. Piling their plates with food, they started eating to catch up. Only stopping at Lily's words.

"Oh dear god. What did you do?" She questioned as the women marched down the rows of students. Eleanor dipped her head and continued to eat.

"You." Jinky's shrill voice echoed in her ear. Eleanor kept quiet, her eyes flickering to Sirius who gulped and shook his head, slowly. "Look at me when I talk to you, foolish girl!" She said from behind Eleanor and she turned to look at her.

"Yes?" Eleanor asked in a blunt tone. All the bugs were gone but she was riddled in tiny red bites. The woman let out a high pitch scoff, frown harshly at her. 

"This was your fault, wasn't it? Thought it would be funny to use those disgusting creatures." She stepped closer. "Use some of your own, huh?" 

"I have no idea what you're referring to." Eleanor replied, far too convincingly for Lily's liking. It was truly like she had not been there ten minutes prior. 

"Actually, Pam-" Sirius tried to speak but was immediately shut down.

"Mr Black. There is no need for your input. This is between me and _her_." Jinky said, so disgusted that she couldn't even say the girls' name. The boy clenched his fist tightly, the only thing stopping him was Remus' tight grip on his shoulder. "Up." She stated firmly, grabbing a fistful of Eleanor's shirt to lead her away. 

"Get your hands off me." Eleanor said, pushing away from the woman.

"Look at you. Scared and deluded. If only your mother had been this pathetic." She started, edging closer to the girl as they exited the hall. The enormous doors slamming after them.

"Don't say a word about my mother. You have no idea who she was." Her defensive tone was shaky, only a small amount of things that could make her crumble in front of someone and her mother was definitely one.

"Please, if she just stayed out of the way. Maybe she would have made it past forty." The woman taunted smugly. "But she wanted what was mine and here you are. A filthy halfbreed, just like your mother. You'll be gone by the end of the year." She sneered, uncomfortably close to El's face who's back was pressed against the stone. 

"Ms Jinky!" A voice called from behind, one that had been listening. The teacher's face visibly dropped as she turned to see Professor McGonagall looking down at her, the same way she had done to Eleanor. "Is there a problem here?" 

"No, Minerva. Just giving some advice." She answered in a sweet voice, slipping past the woman to return to the table.

"Are you alright, Miss Westbrook?" McGonagall questioned, noticing her tear stained face. Although the girl didn't know what Jinky was talking about, McGonagall definitely did and would be a discussion that she'd have with Dumbledore. The blonde plastered on a smile and nodded, as if she hadn't been crying moments prior. Too easy to fool everyone, even Minerva almost believed her. 

"I'm just tired, an early night will do me good." She answered, wrapping her arms tightly around her as she forgot her cloak and blazer. A simple nod of her head and she made her way towards the stairs.

"Eleanor." Her name sounded foreign on McGonagall's tongue, causing her to swerve on the spot. "Could I suggest that someone accompanies you. Miss Evans or even Mr Black?" 

"I'll be fine. Let them enjoy their evening." It was clear she didn't want to bother anyone, something Minerva had done herself. With a nod, she left. Going back into the great hall, she scanned the rows to see James and Sirius whispering among each other. Both of them glaring at Jinky.

"Minnie!" A voice called for her and she turned to the four boys. "Where's El?"

"Gone to bed, Mr Potter. She was quite tired but hopes you all enjoy your evening." She replied to him with a small smile before joining the other teachers. That may have been an adequate answer but, after that rumble, they all knew that was a lie. McGonagall wouldn't let them leave though, they knew that was certain. 

Instead of worry and hurt, confusion was now swirling through her mind. Surely Jinky was talking about the wrong person. Her brain couldn't even comprehend what was happening to her. All she did know was that she needed answers and she needed them now. Without a second thought, she began scribbling down sentences that didn't even make sense. Questions upon questions spilled onto the page. She hadn't even noticed the letter from her step-mother that was on her bed. Even if she had, she was in no mood to open it. Just another reminder that she was the family disappointment. For being good. For trying to be good. For choosing those that genuinely believed in her. That was for another day. Her tears scattered the parchment as she wrote, tucking the letter in the envelope and sealing it. Next thing she knew, she was on her way to the owlery. 

It was only on the way back did she hear the chatter of boys nearby, laughing and joking. One of the voices was very familiar. Thick black curls formed an afro, with the sides carefully shaven. Although he had two dark skinned parents, one black and one hispanic, he was light skinned and had inherited honey coloured eyes. He was well built from the amount of Quidditch he played, he was the Ravenclaw keeper. The boy was often seen with Jack and Frank, he was possibly the most daring one out of the three and was the reason that Frank came out of his shell. He had girls fawning all over him and he loved every minute of it.

"Oi, Eleanor." The voice of Aaron Myers, Delilah's older brother, called. He jumped up and pulled her into a hug, one she reciprocated. After a month, he still hadn't managed to see the girl because he had been that busy with NEWTs. "How have you been, aye?"

"I've been better." She answered, looking over what the boy had been doing. "I see you've been stressed."

"How'd you-" He paused, staring at the bag of green substance. "Want to join us?" Aaron asked, studying the girl for a moment.

"Oh, you know me so well." Eleanor replied with a smile, following him and joining his friends. Both of them seemed slightly familiar.

"This is Jack and Frank." He introduced. Eleanor supposed this was the boy Alice had been talking about, Frank matched her 'dream' boy description perfectly.

"I'm El." She added simply and Frank nodded politely in return. He was not partaking in the group's smoking and was reading his book. According to Alice he wanted to be an Auror too. A boy well known around school for his kind and caring nature, he was the model for how everyone should be. Never in trouble, the boy knew how to have fun but he never got caught. He was named Head boy in his seventh year along with Alice. Frank was around five foot nine, not like that mattered to him. He had slicked back brown hair and bold black eyes with matching long lashes. Ones that'd make the girls jealous.

"So, El. You ever smoked before?" Jack questioned. The boy was the only other transfer for a long time. Originally from Japan, he had transferred in his third year. Already knowing English, it didn't take long for him to fit in. After being roomed with Aaron, they quickly became best friends and now had an enormous circle of friends. Pale skin, hooded eyes and baby soft skin: he was very skinny and was rather tall, especially compared to his parents. 

"Are you kidding? I got Aaron here his first bag." She said with a smirk, rolling one for herself. 

"This is who you got it from?" Jack asked teasingly with a snort causing Aaron to roll his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah. Leave it out." He answered, lighting his up as he tossed the lighter to the blonde. She knew she shouldn't and Lily would murder her if she did but the need to numb her thoughts were becoming far too appealing. So she did what she knew. Smoked her problems away.

After an hour or so of talking, Eleanor decided to head back as curfew was close. She was no longer pitiful or full of sorrow. Now she was elated with a false sense of joy. Appreciating every passing moment outside the castle; the moonbeams kissing the lakes surface, wind dancing across the surface of the tall blades, the branches waved and sky faded from a stone blue into the black abyss - spotted with diamond like twinkles. Everything was perfect during the night, a contradiction of the day.

Barely dodging Filch, she arrived twenty minutes after curfew to a deathly silence (one she'd usually have to suffer in). The fire crackled and spat, dancing in front of a lone figure. Trying to be stealthy was not her forte as the boy turned at the fat lady's commotion. El froze on the spot, a guilty expression clouding her face like a deer caught in the headlights.

However, this time she wasn't met with anger or disgrace. Simply a grey eyed boy with a bright smile on his face, once he assessed what was going on with her. 

"You know-" He started and Eleanor instantly shushed him, eyes flickering towards the staircase. No one was there though. Sirius simply chuckled at her slight paranoia. "Come on, are you hungry?" He asked, picking up a cloak.

"That's a stupid question." Ellie replied, rolling her eyes with a cheeky grin. The boy shook his head at her and through on the cloak. "Why are you wearing that hideous- oh." She paused, staring at his floating head. "Is that?" El blinked as if she was seeing things.

"An invisibility cloak." He spoke proudly, puffing out his chest lightly as he spoke.

"And how the hell did you get that." She quizzed, lightly trailing her hand over the fabric, fully intrigued by the rarity and ability of this piece. 

"James got it three years ago for Christmas, it has been passed down his family for generations." Sirius explained, throwing the material over the blonde. "Right. Ready to go?"

"So, no one can see us?" El questioned, walking in sync with him as they left to go to the kitchens. 

"No but they can hear you, so shush." He said, hearing the paintings complain at El's overly loud voice on the peaceful Friday night. As if it were a reflex, she smacked her hands over her mouth, whispering an 'ow' as she did so. The boy snickered at her actions, causing her to glare jokingly at him. "This way." He whispered and they reached a large fruit painting. Before she could say anything about not touching the painting, the door flung open.

"Master Black," A little house elf came shuffling forward with a bright smile, she didn't miss the slightly distasteful look on his face as she approached. "What would you like, sir?" 

"Pastries." Eleanor said, returning the wide smile, making the house elf all giddy. "What's your name?" She asked carefully, not wanting to upset her.

"My name's Tink, Miss Westbrook!" She replied.

"Well, Tink, it's very nice to meet you." Eleanor said, making the house else squeal. In a hurry, she got to work, making what was usually on display. She took a seat on the metal table, not bothering to change out of her uniform after the long days. Sirius looked at her with an amused look, when she quirked a brow at him, he started.

"Do you ever eat anything else?" He questioned, standing by her side. 

"What?!" She exclaimed with a giggle. "They are delicious AND come in a variation so they're never boring." Eleanor emphasised, needing to share her love for the food. "How can you not love pastry? I mean, except pumpkin pasties." She said, pulling a 'yuck' face.

"And what is wrong with a pumpkin pasty?" He asked and she acted as if he'd just murdered a dog in front of her.

"Are you serious?" She scoffed. Clearly about to make a pun, El pressed her finger to the boy's lip to silence him. Watching him intently, his eyes followed her hand back to her face. A smirk more devilish than his own itching to spread across her face. It didn't. Just a small contempt smile took its place as she slowly moved her finger from his lip, dropping her hand back in her lap. The silence falling over both of them. She looked away for a moment, swinging her legs lightly as she waited for her pastries.

"You're absolutely freezing. You know that right?" He said breaking the silence. "Here, take this." Sirius added, pulling off his black hoodie and handing it to her.

"Thank you." She whispered softly, pulling it on and she instantly felt warmer.


	7. whores on halloween

**_THE MORNING OF_** Halloween was a busy one for everyone except Eleanor. All of her friends had cleared off. The boys were sorting out the common room, Mary was playing quidditch, Alice was spending time with the mystery boy, Lily had disappeared before she awoke along with Marlene and Delilah - she simply presumed they were heading to Hogsmeade to get a costume like everyone else. Annabeth had sent her a costume and told her that her father was away on business, and wouldn't be able to respond for a while. Typical, the one time she actually needed him, he wasn't there. Seemed to be the story of her life.

Since the party didn't start till late, she headed down to the common room to see James and Sirius arguing over decorations. She needed a distraction from today. Instead of using magic they had Peter and Remus up ladders to hang a garland of bats. The blonde blinked at the situation. Peter could hardly match Remus' height and the ladder beneath him wobbled as his body shook due to him standing on his tiptoes. Whereas, Remus was quickly getting frustrated and it didn't help that the full moon was three days away. However, the room was coming together well, piece by piece.

"You know you could use magic." She expressed, leaning on the side of the sofa, in the jumper she stole from Sirius and some black cycling shorts. For a moment, they didn't look back until they processed what Eleanor said. Both boys turned around and blinked at her, as if she was delusional.

"And have it completely off centred? Your crazy woman!" James replied, shaking his head in disbelief. "Honestly, do you not know the first thing about decorating." He said, as if it was some sort of complicated thing. They both turned back to see the other boys had hung the garland without their instructions. "You can't be serious!"

"Well, actually, he is." Peter responded, receiving a laugh from four out of five people there. Not James though, who looked like a bull about to run at a red flag. Peter's eyes went wide as he squeaked, jumping off the ladder. The boy ran up the stairs with James hot on his tail, leaving the other three alone.

"I didn't realise decorating was so intense." She said as Remus joined her side, closing his eyes as he curled up in a ball. The girl looked down at him with a sad expression, sometimes it was like she could feel his pain just like her friend back home. "Have you ever heard of ' _salutem exhausit_ '?" Eleanor asked softly as he tried to get comfortable, she knew that he wouldn't have but it was more of an incitement to get him interested.

"What's that?" He mumbled into the cushion of the sofa. His tone was rather blunt but she knew he meant nothing by it. The boys crashing about upstairs were not helping and he was certainly not looking forward to the night, even though he loved Halloween.

"Well, it's a mix of herbs and a splash of magic that helps soothes the symptoms." She explained which instantly caught the boys attention. Locking eyes with her, some part of him thought she was lying about it since no one had ever told him this before. Not even Dumbledore.

"What do you mean by that?" He quizzed. Although he was glad that the girl knew and was accepting, a small part of him believed that she wasn't genuine and he didn't know why. Ellie had been as good to him as the boys, which was strange. On top of that, she didn't treat him any different and always had spare chocolate. Even the others were astonished.

"Basically, it can make the days leading up to the moon, and after, much more bearable for you. It doesn't change the main transformation though, still as painful and it won't affect you in that form, but it helps calm everything else." El explained in a low whisper as Sirius joined them, curiously.

"How do you make it?" He questioned and Eleanor laughed a little.

"I've got that bit covered." She stated, jumping off the edge of the arm. "Just wanted to know if you were interested. I'll take that as a yes." Eleanor told him, skipping towards the doorway.

"Don't bother yourself." He said, in true Remus fashion, "I wouldn't want to trouble you." which caused the girl to giggle.

"You really are stubborn." Eleanor replied, shaking her head at him. "It takes twenty minutes, if that. I'd say you should be resting instead of helping these." She insisted as the other two boys came bounding down the stairs, laughing together. Sirius turned to her with a frown and she simply winked at him, disappearing out of the common room.

"What was that?" Remus asked the boy curiously, Sirius was still staring at the doorway that was about to swing shut.

"I believe, Moony, our dear Padfoot has fallen for the pretty blonde." James chimed in, ruffling the boys black hair, sitting on the arm of the chair Sirius was on.

"Shove off, Prongs." He said moodily, pushing the boy of the edge. A smile gracing his features as James pouted like a toddler, on the floor. To be honest, Sirius wasn't sure if James' words were true. He knew things were always different with Eleanor but he blamed that on circumstance. Something about seeing her in his hoodie made his brain click, he didn't know what he exactly felt but it was something more than friendship. He knew it was wrong to, especially when she had no interest in him, but the enigma that was Eleanor Westbrook had finally enraptured him, just like hundreds of others that were in her presence. The boy sat and thought for a while, maybe he wasn't good enough for her. Out of everyone in the world, why would she choose him?  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


After a quick stop at the hall and Hogsmeade, the trio had returned to the library so Marlene could finish her last essay. Much to Lily's disappointment. They all gathered around a hidden table, amongst the books, and the blonde instantly began to finish her scroll. The other two had been asking where Eleanor was but there was a simple reason Lily didn't wake the girl. Brainstorming since breakfast, she wasn't sure how to spring it into conversation as Marlene had a tendency to defend Eleanor's habits as she had similar ones herself. She knew that Marls meant well but she was so scared for her best friend, Eleanor never wanted to bother anyone -much like Remus- and that was why Lily was so unsure when El began to cry a few weeks prior. The Westbrook was in over her head, trying to protect everyone over herself. Even those who don't deserve it.

"Are you okay, Lils?" Delilah's voice snapped the redhead out of her thoughts, as she turned to smile at her concerned friends. She nodded before lightly clearing her throat.

"It's not me. It's-" Lily started, shakily, and was cut off by Marlene.

"Eleanor?" She questioned, leaning in a bit closer. Obviously more interested in the subject now. Her question answered when Lily nodded. "And what's wrong now?"

"You know that night that Jinkey made a scene in the hall?" The redhead questioned and they both nodded, urging her to continue. "Well, she came back high and-"

"Please tell me you didn't shout at her, did you?" Delilah now interrupted her and Lily shook her head, looking down shamefully as she remembered the one time she did, and the other two sighed in relief. "Good. It would be hypocritical if you did."

"One, we were young when that happened. Two, it was the fourth time that week and it was only Friday. Third, that was not what I wanted to talk about." She explained, getting slightly defensive. Opening her bag, she pulled out an open letter and threw it on the table. Both of them were confused until Delilah read the letter, followed by Marlene. Their faces instantly dropped as they did so.

"You stole her letter!" Marlene hissed in a whispered shout. Frowning at her redheaded friend. "What was going through your head? This is-"

"Completely absurd, the content of the letter that is. I'm glad you took it but don't you think Eleanor deserves to know? I mean, this is the first time I've seen her Dad write to her." Delilah expressed, scanning the letter over again and grimacing at the contents.

"What do we do?" Marls quizzed, no longer able to focus on her work. "She definitely can't go home. I wouldn't be surprised if that man sold her off." She snarled, being protective of the girl like usual.

"You know it'll be worse if she doesn't listen! That man is far too powerful for his own good. He had Eleanor's mother mysteriously become sick and disappear as if nothing happened. I'm sure he could easily do that to El, if she carries on. Did you not notice the new scar behind her ear? She got that after summer because I vividly remember curling her hair and it wasn't there." Lily explained, fidgeting in her seat, playing with the sleeve of her knitted jumper.

"Why were you looking at her neck?" Delilah asked slightly confused before all three of them laughed softly. The truth was, none of them knew what to do. The one they were talking about was best in these situations. Now they were struggling to help her.

"I say we ask the boys." Marlene suggested, instantly earning a scoff from Lily. Those six words were enough for Lily to believe that Marls was borderline insane. "Why not? Sirius is super close with her." She began to explain, seemingly hurt from her own words. "And the others have a soft spot for her, James was fuming after the Jinkey incident. I'm pretty sure he would have hexed Pamela into oblivion if it wasn't for Remus."

"You're right. But we can't." Lily sighed, confusing the other two girls. "Eleanor doesn't even tell us about these things, we have to pry it out of her before she explodes. What makes you think she'd want them knowing too. She's known the boys for a month, maybe longer for Sirius. Which we still need to enquire about. So, no, I don't think we should. Not yet at least. Does anyone know where Adelaide is? She can help." Lily explained to them.

"The last person El wants knowing about this is Adelaide. She'd take this all to the grave to protect her. To protect any of us, even. Even if we do, Adelaide has been running around with her new friends and hasn't even uttered a word to Eleanor. I think we should be the ones to help her. And I believe I have a way." Delilah reminded them, peaking their interests at the possibility of a plan.  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


Upon her return, the common was empty but was now fully decorated and it looked amazing. Fake cobwebs were strung up across the sealing and some across the tables. Blood was splattered around the room with matching blood bags full of punch, 'turn back now' was smeared across the wall. The lights were dimmed and a neon orange, purple, and green were shining upon the room. Two tables had been set up, one for all the drinks that was full to the brim and one for food that was yet to come. First, second, and third years had been ushered to the hall and would be in their dorms for the rest of the night. The parties were only for fifth years and up, so, each of the fourth years dorms got a case of butterbeer and firewhiskey to keep them up there for the night. Except for two, they had been placed on door duty with an offer to come to the next party that the boys hosted. There was so much detail, even in the smallest of spaces, they really went all out.

She wandered towards the boys staircase, ducking under the caution tape to get through, and headed up to the top of the tower. Knocking before entering, she heard a low groan followed by a 'come in'. When she walked in, she noticed only a moping Remus was there. It was freezing in the room, causing her to pull the jumper around her frame, tightly.

"Where are the others?" The girl asked, slightly concerned that the boys had left him alone in such a state. He shakily raised his arm and pointed at an opening in the roof, a hatch. No wonder it was so cold. Rolling her eyes lightly, she got up and grabbed Remus' glass from his nightstand and mixed a quarter of the herbs with water, stirring until the concoction went clear. "Here drink this." She held the glass up to him as he sat up, carefully drinking whatever she had given him. His face immediately contorted in confusion.

"Why does this taste like chocolate?" Remus quizzed, the cold coming to tickle his red hot skin.

"That's the magic. Apparently it tastes awful without it." El explained, for a moment he believed that she had slipped him amortentia before realising that it was the wrong colour for that potion. "It'll take fifteen to twenty minutes to kick in, I suggest having a nap so it works to the full extent." She explained, placing the glass back on the stand before folding his blankets over him. "You'll get cold, fast." Eleanor warned, making sure he was tucked in. The boy smiled lightly at her antics, she was nothing like the articles made her out to be.

"Thank you." He said softly, closing his eyes just beforehand. Her face lit up as she watched him settle. No longer feeling the ache of his pain, she hoisted herself up and through the trap door. Being greeted with a breathtaking view of Hogwarts, she paused. Taking every little drop in. Only to be interrupted by a familiar redhead.

"Get away, Potter. I will Bat-Bogey hex you!" Lily screamed, turning to see James smugly hovering over a similar trap door to the one she just climbed out of. Sirius and Peter laid on the tiles of the actual roof, laughing their heads off at the situation. She didn't know what had happened but it wasn't long before bats were crawling out of James' nose, causing El to laugh so hard that her abs hurt. James ran laps on the flat stone surface trying to get them away from him as Lily popped her head out to watch the commotion. Eleanor walked over to her and she began to talk. "Where have you been? We have to get ready. You haven't been with these all this time have you?"

"No." She responded, slipping into their dorm after Lily moved. Closing the hatch over Eleanor's bed. "I was just doing something for Remus."

"Why? Is he alright?" Delilah interjected, catching the blonde off guard. She hadn't realised the other girls were here.

"He is fine, now go get ready." Eleanor told her, sitting down on her bed. The others had insisted on getting ready the muggle way but she wasn't bothered and would probably wait until last minute to get ready. Lily was already curling Alice's hair whilst Marlene helped Mary with her dress and Delilah began to apply her makeup.

After a frantic four hours, everyone was nearly ready. Gathering on Eleanor's and Lily's bed, they had gone through a bottle of firewhiskey for pre-drinks. As well as a shot of tequila each which didn't go down well with Delilah or Alice. It was two minutes until the party officially started but people were already in. Eleanor was yet to get dressed. So, she ushered the others downstairs as her outfit was a surprise.

Lily, Delilah and Marlene had gone matching. The redhead went as the devil, Marlene as an angel and Delilah as an angel of death. Eleanor planned to match them, in her own way. Alice had gone as a vampire and Mary was a zombie. She couldn't wait to see everyone's costumes. For now, it was time to focus on her own.

Placing her gold headpiece in, she connected her wings to her dress and she checked to make sure nothing was broken. The girl stepped into the short corseted dress and used her magic to fasten the back. She stepped back to observe her reflection, making sure the outfit looked good. It most definitely did. Due to the silhouette of the gold leaf like ball gown dress, her legs looked elegantly long and a perfect hourglass figure. For once, she was happy with her reflection. With one last look in the mirror and a deep breath, she exited the bathroom to put on her matching heels.

Finally, the party was in full swing and it was time to join her friends. She adjusted the costume and left the dorms, being careful not to fall over. Ducking under the caution tape that had appeared, she straightened out her dress, looking for her friends in the process. As soon as she began to walk forward, most eyes turned on her as she passed. The girl left jaws hanging and eyes doing a double take, it was hard to believe Eleanor Westbrook could get any more beautiful than usual. That girl was full of surprises.

It didn't take long for the blonde to spot Lily's fiery hair and she rushed over. Being mindful to not knock anyone with her wings. A soon as she approached, she heard Lily gasp causing a massive grin to spread across Eleanor's face.

"Holy shit. Is that real gold?" Marlene said, shooting towards the girl as she admired the head piece. Letting out a small laugh, the girl nodded in response.

"Only the head piece." She confirmed, doing a twirl for them. "So, what do you think?"

"I love it." Delilah chimed in, holding out a cup for Eleanor. "Plus, we all kind of match now." She added, throwing back the rest of her drink.

"Careful there, Lilah. I don't want to be holding back your hair at 9pm." Marlene said, throwing her arm over the girl as the group moved to find Alice and Mary.  
  
  


Around Eleanor's third drink, she spotted some commotion at the door. With the boys nowhere to be found, she went forward to investigate. The two fourth years were sternly blocking the entrance with countless students on the other side, she had no idea how they were supposed to fit in the common room but she didn't question it. Flicking through pages of paper, the two were clearly searching for names. As she approached, the two quickly swivelled on their heels, blushing at the mere presence of Eleanor. Once they did, she instantly saw who they were keeping out.

"It's fine, boys. They're with me." She told them, reaching out to pull Dorcas through who was connected to, who she presumed was, Edith. They tried to interject but her raised brow instantly silenced them.

"Thank you!" Dorcas exclaimed over the loud music. "We've been trying to get in for the last five minutes but they're very persistent."

"That would be James' fault, anyone not on the list that was found here would get them bat bogey hexed. I don't think they want to end up on the marauders' prank list." Eleanor explained causing the Slytherin to giggle. They finally stopped and she could finally see their costumes. Dorcas had opted to go as cat woman and Edith had gone as Poison Ivy -temporarily dying her hair with a spell Eleanor gave to Dorcas- from the muggle comics the two often read. "You must be Edith. I'm Eleanor." She greeted the small girl who had a wide smile on her face. Instead of shaking El's hand, Edith opted for a bone crushing hug that caught Eleanor off guard but she enjoyed it nonetheless. Edith was pretty ordinary. Short, good grades, kind, well presented and had pretty blue eyes. The only thing that stood out was her bright indigo hair, something she was continuously changed. Her only friend was Dorcas, the two were very similar, both locked into a box that they wanted to escape from but their families had expectations. She spent most of her time in the greenhouse because of her passion for herbology, something her family disapproved of because they wanted her in a position of power, Edith couldn't think of anything worse.

"Let's get you both a drink!" Eleanor insisted before guiding them through the groups of people. On the table was an array of drinks, from the wizarding world and ones she instantly recognised from the muggle world. She had wondered how they got a hold of them but, then again, she wondered how they got a way with this party in the first place. Eleanor decided it was a good time to refill, she didn't know how long the supply would last. Out of everything on the table, the only gin that was there was pink gin which happened to be El's favourite, so she settled for that mixed with lemonade.

"What are you drinking?" Edith asked curiously, observing the pink liquid. She had never seen half of these drinks before and it was completely fascinating.

"Just some gin. Want to try?" She asked, holding her cup up to the girl. Without hesitation, she took the cup and sipped a mouthful, flinching at the new taste. A small smile appeared on her lips as she passed it back.

"Could you make me one please." Edith said, earning a sharp nod in response. El knew the two were going to get on well. After making the drink and Dorcas doing three shots, the group moved to find Eleanor's other friends as Adelaide had opted to go to the Slytherin party, without even telling her. It would have been courteous of her to do so, especially since she hadn't bothered with El. The blonde was curious as to what had happened with Adelaide, on the first day she relentlessly didn't want to leave her side but after that she had disappeared.

Now was not the time though, the three headed towards the group of girls that was dancing. There was a lack of their fifth member, Alice, who she had just passed standing with Aaron, Jack and Frank.

"Lily! Marlene!" She called over the music, tapping the redheads shoulder as they danced to the music. She spun around to face her, wrapping her in a tight bear hug. Obviously tipsy, on the verge of being drunk. The blonde tugged on Marlene, Mary and Delilah to bring them to meet her friends. "This is Dorcas and Edith! My friends." She introduced, pointing at each girl as she introduced them.

Lily instantly pulled them both into a hug in her confident state, making the two feel instantly welcome.

"You're the girl in our potions, right?" The redhead asked, keeping an arm slung over their shoulders as she talked to Dorcas. With a nod of her head, Lily continued. "Your absolutely brilliant, you know that. Oh! You have to show me how you brew-" Lily drabbled on as she introduced Delilah and Edith, knowing they both have a passion for plants and herbology.

"Another drink, Ellie?" Marlene whispered in her ear and she immediately agreed. When the blondes departed, Dorcas was slightly disappointed. She wanted to meet Marlene, she had always wanted to talk to her but never knew how. Supposedly if she asked Eleanor to hang out more, she could talk to her another time but she didn't want to use the girl like that...

The two ventured off when the lights suddenly cut and light squeals erupted around the room. She clutched onto Marlene's hand tightly as they waited for something to happen. Standing shoulder to shoulder, she could hear Marlene's shaky breaths. That girl had never liked the dark, more specifically what's in it. Ellie softly grazed her thumb over the back of the blondes hand to soothe her nerves. A minute or two later, the girl beside her had slightly calmed herself.

"BOO!" A voice shouted in front of them, stood on the table, as a spotlight shone on a clown. A blooded knife pointed at them. Eleanor jumped back with Marlene as others screamed, she almost swung at them. The figure started to laugh as he removed the mask. Sirius Black. The other Marauders had done the same around the room. "You should have seen your faces!" He cackled, holding his stomach. Both girls looked at each other before looking back at the boy that was finding it hard to control his laughter. Eleanor's heart was still pumping hard as the two approached him, pushing him lightly and he fell to the floor. He looked so offended as the two blondes smirked, high giving each other.

"Sirius, there you are!" A high pitched voice called as he was standing up. Nothing but your typical popular girl. She tried everything she could to get the attention, her favourite was to play dumb even though she was incredibly smart. That was the only way people would like her, in Violet's opinion. Dull mahogany eyes, fake platinum hair with her ginger roots showing through and a patchy orange tan. Everything she did was to please others and yet she felt so empty. Never complete. She was surrounded by other girls just like her, fuelling her deprecating ego.

The girl was basically wearing lingerie with platform heels, by the look on Marlene's face this was someone that she had not had a good experience with. Two others stood behind the girl, all fake blondes too, wearing matching outfits. Except one who was wearing a silk slip dress. Also, with an urgent need to be the centre of attention, Georgia had put up with the other two girls just to feel wanted. Loneliness made people do weird things. Although a natural brunette, Violet had insisted she dyed her hair blonde making them all match. She hated every second of it. The girl would put up with it though. What other choice did she have? Both of them were purebloods, giving her an advantage in life that she would have never had on her own. There was a reason she was in Ravenclaw. Her family was mainly Columbian and they didn't exactly accept her anymore due to their traditional views. She was fluent in two languages, she had taught herself more over the years. Maybe five foot five or six, she was an average girl with average looks, trying her hardest to stay in the spotlight like her muggle parents wanted. Georgia watched the two friends with a guilty expression, not wanting to be there at all. She knew that Violet would not be wanted there but the ring leader had insisted. Sighing lightly, she gave Eleanor a light smile which the girl returned, making her feel recognised for once.  
But then there was the other that was clearly trying to be Violet. She was like a little puppy, desperately wanting to be loved by someone that never would. A fake blonde, dying her hair just to impress Violet. She was the third member to the trio, even though she was more of an errands girl. The girl had no talent, no brain cells and relied on what little looks she had. For some reason, she was worse than Violet, loving the gossip and loved to make fun of others for no reason. She came from old money, never had to work a day in her life and was already betrothed to another man. That thought alone was terrifying, especially for the poor boy. Georgia didn't fit into the group in any way. It was a surprise she got into Ravenclaw, people assumed that she admired intelligence. Something she lacked. As soon as she saw Marlene and Eleanor, she scoffed, taking in their appearance.

Sirius visibly winced at the girl's presence as his eyes flickered to Eleanor. He couldn't tell if she was hurt, jealous, confused or just simply disturbed.

"Come on!" She begged, tugging on the sleeve of his costume and even Caprice came to help drag him away. As they dragged him into the crowd, Violet turned back and mouthed 'back off, bitch'. The girl blinked, not quite sure what to do.

"What the fuck just happened." El spoke, raising her brows at the space that was now filling up with people. She looked at Marlene who simply just laughed and squeezed her hands as they moved on. "I need to get plastered after that!" She expressed with a laugh as the two started grabbing a few bottles that seemed to be replaced immediately. Drinking seemed like a must with her thought beginning to spiral.

_{play the song above!}_

Anhour had passed since they had collected a bunch of bottles for the girls. Alice had rejoined them and had brought Frank with her. They talked, laughed and were now pulling each other up to dance as others did the same. AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Aerosmith, Ramones, Eagles and so many other bands blasted out the speakers, one at a time, encouraging everyone to party.

"Dorcas! Dance with us." She encouraged, pulling her up with one hand because the other was holding a half drunk bottle of vodka. The girl spun her friend, making her laugh as they joined the group. Eleanor joined the others as Frank and Alice danced together, making Mary and Lily giggle. They'd never seen her so free, no longer stressed about the future. She was finally enjoying those teenage years.

"Here try this!" Marlene shouted over the music, pushing a bottle of Dragon Barrel Brandy to the girls perfectly painted lips. Forcing her to drink, she almost spat out the liquid as it burned her throat. Immediately coughing afterwards, the two laughed leaning on each other. "Did you like it?" She asked, looking at the blonde, their faces only centimetres away as they looked each other in the eyes. She nodded slowly, that spirit-lifting smile pulling Marlene in.

Rolling off of her, Eleanor stood up and threw her hands in the air as she sang along to the words. People around her joined in; some drunk, some high and some too carefree to give a shit. The girls dance together, Eleanor spun Lily before they began to jump with the rest of the group, forming a mini mosh pit.  
  
  


Drinks swirling, adrenaline rushing, moods lifted, girls laughing, boys singing: everyone in that moment forgot. Under the soft purple and green strobe lighting, the party goers swayed and swooped around the room without a care in the world. No outside interference; suddenly they didn't have to grow up and they could be their true selves. No war, no death and for Eleanor there was no father. Euphoria.

The four girls were no strangers to partying, they had crashed many over the summer that this was now second nature. It was the atmosphere that Eleanor loved the most, she felt tiny in the waves of people and was able to breath. She wasn't singled out. Finally an ordinary teen, enjoying her time with her best friends.

Arms high in the air, she swung her hips to the rhythm. She had ditched the wings long ago. Her hair whipped around as she danced, her eyes closed as she embraced the moment. It was the perfect excuse to indulge in the things that made her forget, gave her a dose of temporary relief.

Only thinking about the current; people sipped and downed, snorted and smoked, kissed and moaned, danced and raved. Nothing could stop them. Everyone so desperate to be on cloud nine. Music flooded their senses, driving them to be whoever they wanted to be that night. On Halloween, they all got to hide behind their masks...

So, hips swayed. Lyrics were screamed. They got pushed and shoved like rag dolls, listening to AC/DC's latest album. Heads bobbed. Hands reached for the sky. Brushing against their friends as they moved so dangerously. Limbs entangled with each other. Drinks being shared. Cigarettes being passed around in a circle. Costumes breaking. Drunks falling. Gossip. Laughter. Chanting. A drinking competition, another Gryffindor trying to show off. Everyone's breathless. Lights flashing. Hearts pumping. Lips touching. Another couple heading to a broom closet. Skin tainted with bruises. Heels thrown off, never to be retrieved in the morning. Dresses ruffled up. Shirts unbuttoned. Friends passing secrets. Bonds being made. First times being taken.

What they did know is they all had limited time left. If they hadn't tried something, now was the time. The teenage years were dwindling down to nothing. Memories are all they would have one day. That's why Remus took his first pill with his friends that night, Lily had kissed a random boy she was talking to, Dorcas let loose with her new friends, Peter found the confidence to talk to the boy he had his eye on for months, Georgia left her friends for some new people, Alice got drunk for the first time, even James tried to flirt with another girl. They knew that they shouldn't have but tomorrow wasn't likely to come, especially with the rise of the dark lord.  
  
  


"Here." Eleanor said, passing Marlene a cigarette as they sat on the window ledge, making sure to not get any smoke inside. She had been tempted since the day she got here to smoke again, with Lily too drunk to even remember what day it is. El believed this was the perfect opportunity. Gladly taking one, Marlene lit both of their cigarettes as they looked across Hogwarts grounds. Eleanor could see the lights flashing from the Slytherin common room but simply shook her head, she didn't want to dampen her own spirits. "Tonight has been great." She said, taking a puff and exhaling, as if she was getting rid of all her troubles. Marlene hummed in agreement, leaning her head on her friend. The two were so alike, yet so dissimilar. It was weird but made the best friendship.

"Reminds me of simpler times." Marlene replied and Eleanor snorted at her dramatic statement, earning her a shove.

"Please, you're acting like we didn't just go to Milan two months ago." The girl replied, tapping off her ash as the guest still raved around them.

"Oh, you know what I mean." Marls told her, squishing out her cigarette and Eleanor did this same. "Now let's try and find the others before they do something that we would." She said as they held onto each other's hand to guide their way through the groups of people, why else would they?

To say the common room was small, they must have still been a hundred people packed in there. Trying to navigate and find your friends was hard, especially with all the masks and sfx makeup. It also didn't help that the tiredness was starting to kick in for Eleanor, meaning she needed a top up or to go to bed. She really should have grabbed a bottle beforehand, once you left a spot you were never going back.

The two had decided that the sofas would be the best place to look, plus they'd be able to see over the entire crowd. Since Sirius' departure, she hadn't been able to find any of the boys which was strange. They loved the attention. When she shoved her way through the crowds, she paused as she scanned the figures around. It didn't help that she didn't know what costumes the boys were wearing.

That's when she saw the fake bloodied knife, thrown messily onto the floor by the sofa. She got closer to the figures and, as the lights flashed, she recognised who it was. Who they were. The black haired boy had got cosy in the corner with the blonde from earlier - straddling him. Touching him. Kissing _him_.

Frozen to the spot, she felt bile rise up her throat and a pain shot to her chest. What made the sensation worse was that she didn't know why she reacted like this, later she would blame the alcohol. Tears gently pricked her eyes as she took a step back, knocking over a bottle that shattered against the cold wooden floor. Taking that as her que to go, she hurried off with Marlene hot on her tail after witnessing that whole mess.

Sirius saw the golden girl rush away and instantly got up, he was flushed with guilt and he didn't know what to do. Was she upset over him or was she just passing by? He caught Marlene's glare though, that made him believe the former. That only worsened the guilt...

Frantically ripping off her costume, she slipped into the outfit from that morning as she was consumed by her own misery and rage. The head piece was difficult to get off and she almost broke it in the process. Collapsing on the edge of her bed, she put her head in her hands and finally let the tears fall. For once she just wanted a happy Halloween.

The door swung open and then was quietly shut, cancelling out the noise from the guests taking part in karaoke. Hearing the light taps of Marlene's heels, she sniffled and attempted to dry her eyes. It was no use.

Not saying a word, Marlene joined her side and pulled her close. Just holding her. The tears began to flood and tomorrow she'd blame the alcohol. It pained Marlene to see the girl like this, more so than anyone else. Maybe because El never crumbled, maybe she sought comfort in the blonde or maybe it was something more.

"W-why am I like this?" Eleanor mumbled into the girl's chest. "I just want to be normal, Marlene." She said as her sobs fell silent.

"What do you mean?" She asked in response, looking down at the girl in _his_ hoodie.

"Go a day without hurting. Me or someone else." El replied and Marlene frowned at the response. "I'd give up everything I have..." She began to explain as her voice trailed off into a whisper. "Just to feel like I was enough."

"But you are enough. You're amazing. Without all the fame and fortune, you are everything I want to be." Marlene told her, causing the girl to let out a low laugh.

"I don't need the pity." She retorted, her head falling onto Marlene's lap as she curled into a ball. "I've ruined your fun tonight, I'm crying for no reason. Jinky was right." Eleanor mumbled.

"You're not crying for no reason. I'm surprised you didn't let it out sooner." Marls expressed with a breathy laugh. The two were silent for a moment, a few more tears trickled down El's face as she tried to find the right words. It was now or never, the likeliness of her talking about this again would be slim. This is exactly why she preferred getting high instead of drunk, she got far too emotional for her own liking. 

"I'm not even myself. My style is given to me, my hair is a certain way because I'm told to have it that way, the interests I'm into are mostly chosen for me. I am not me no matter what. Even Ballet, I got into it because of my mother but now I hate it because Annabeth forces it down my throat." Eleanor said, just wanting to find herself. Every time she tried, she was shut down and told her to comply. Otherwise she was a disappointment. 

"Marlene." She mumbled as she sniffled, the blonde hummed in response, prompting her to continue. "Tod- day is..." Eleanor exhaled slowly, blinking out another river of tears. "Today is the anniversary of my mother's death." The girl finally admitted it, like sharing this information would make her feel better. 

Marlene opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Nobody knew. Not even Lily. She stared at the girl in her lap, speechless. In this moment, she was glad Lily stole that letter. It was easy to forget that Eleanor didn't have a perfect life, especially when they only saw each other for a couple of weeks a year. She got so good at acting but being surrounded by these people twenty four seven, it was hard to keep the facade up.

"What's even worse is that my Father pretends that she doesn't even exist! He acts like it's always been Annabeth. On top of that, Adelaide doesn't care. Her own mother is dead and she doesn't even care!" Eleanor pushed herself up, feeling a bubble of rage brewing. Not only her, Marlene's face had contorted into a frown at the idea. She had never got along with Ada, especially after that prank that pulled them out of battle of the bands. Everyone laughed it off but Marlene was secretly pissed because she really wanted the band to work. "I brought it up two years ago, she said I was being selfish because I wanted to visit her grave. So, I went alone. Turns out she just wanted to party." She let out, sucking in a breath and returning to lay on Marlene. This time she faced the blonde. "I just really miss her, Marls."

"I know you do. It doesn't help that you had no time to grieve." The girl replied, lightly stroking the girls hair to calm her down. "You know what," Marlene said after a brief moment "At Christmas, we'll do a proper send off. If you want. I understand if you don't but it may help you heal." She explained and a soft smile graced Eleanor's lips.

"You would do that?" El asked shyly and Marlene nodded lightly.

"Of course, that's what best friends do."

The two had continued to talk late into the night, the effects of alcohol starting to wear off. Sharing had helped a bit but the girl found it difficult. The words, the anticipation, the potential rejection. All things Eleanor hated. Marlene understood, she didn't wear her heart on her sleeve either. She never shared anything either because someone had things worse than her. Everything seemed to be easy around the two, they simply understood each other. 

"About earlier." Marlene spoke up, eyeing Eleanor's face cautiously before continuing. "I saw him and the way you looked at him..."

"I don't know. Before you ask, Marls. I just think with everything that's happened, I was bound to explode over nothing." She tried to justify herself but she was lying to herself. Firstly, she hadn't exploded, she simply dusted the surface of her endless void and, secondly, that wasn't nothing. The confusion that had nagged her since the day they met just became unbearable.

"I see." Marlene answered, almost relieved. For a moment, Eleanor frowned before brushing it off.

"Do you remember last year when you came out to me?" Eleanor spoke up and Marlene nodded instantly. "And you told me not to tell a soul until you told your family? Did you, yet?"

"No." She shook her head, looking away. Fiddling with her white dress, her eyes began to sting. "Well, you know I don't have the best relationship with my family. They are quite conservative in their views, bar blood status - they don't care about that, and we were having dinner one night when a g-gay rights protest were displayed on the news, that's when both my brothers and father began saying just this awful stuff! I think my Dad will kick me out, Eleanor." The girl explained, patting the area around her eyes dry. Eleanor hugged her waist, holding her tightly as Marlene had done with her earlier.

"You will always have me. That's what best friends are for, right?" Eleanor replied, making the other blonde chuckle.

"Why do you ask?" Marlene said, after calming herself and Eleanor returned to facing her, practically admiring her as she thought of her next words.

"Because." El paused, a sense of joy washed over her as she swallowed her nerves, finally able to say this out loud to someone. "I'm bi..." Marlene's face lit up into the largest grin ever, as if she was thankful that she wasn't the only one. Before she could say anything, the door burst open and six figures crowded the door. Laughing, chatting, falling. 

The two got up, helping Delilah by grabbing Lily and taking her over to the bathroom, so Delilah could set up something for the others to sleep on. Being the only one sober enough to perform magic. 

"You go take care of Alice, I've got her." Eleanor told Marlene who listened and hurried over to where Mary and Alice were. Grabbing hold of her auburn hair, she was prepared for the worst. Her eyes flickered over to Marls who was already watching her, both sharing a large smile. 

Until Lily began to vomit, so El's attention returned to the redhead, making sure she got it all in the toilet. Rubbing her back and keeping the sick out of her hair. After she cleaned the redhead's face and made her change into pyjamas. Then she tucked her in bed with a bucket by her bedside. She had done this for Lily more times then the other girls combined but _it's what friends do._


	8. the birthday boy

**_AFTER A DAY_** of treating hangovers and relaxing, there was only one day to go shopping. Since it was half term, the students were allowed to go to Hogsmede each day which came in handy as she still hadn't got Sirius a present. She hadn't actually spoken to him since that night and had spent her time cuddled up with all the girls. Deciding that it was none of her business, she decided to push whatever she felt aside.

"Okay, I left you an outfit in the bathroom." Marlene said, exiting in a shirt with a black slip dress over the top, fishnets, and platform buckled up boots. She wanted to try a new style and Marlene had offered her clothes to try.

Pulling on the black dress, fishnets, thigh high socks, heavy buckle up boots, and an oversized black corduroy jacket. She paused taking in her appearance, something didn't look right. Taking a belt, she cinched her waist and she smiled at her figure. From the ripe age of eleven, she had issues with her body, her diet, her appearance. Being criticised in the media as a child was something that never left her. At the minute she was content, the thought was always at the back of her brain that she was going to relapse. It was probably for the best that she no longer had to do ballet everyday, like at Beauxbatons, only when she was at home with Annabeth. According to her, it would produce the perfect woman. It was once her, not now. As she observed her outfit, she smiled. Genuinely. A smile that could lore her desired to death.

"What do we think?" Eleanor asked, stepping out of the bathroom, doing a small spin before ruffling her hair up. The girls turned to watch her as she let out a giddy giggle. One that Lily hadn't heard since El's mother passed.

"That you actually like what you're wearing." Dorcas commented and Edith nodded, the girls had stayed over for the last few nights and had hit it off with the other. Eleanor was glad, it meant she could hang around with them more.

"I agree. It really suits you too!" Alice said, jumping up and hugged the Westbrook. "I'll see you all later. Studying awaits."

"You mean your study date." El said mindlessly, making the girl blush as she picked up her bag full of books. "Say hi to Frank for me." She called after her as Delilah and Mary dramatically gasped at this information and the others laughed.

"Are you ready to go?" She asked Marlene and Dorcas. Both of whom needed to go to Hogsmeade too. Lily was still embarrassed to leave so Mary and Edith had offered to stay with her. Delilah already had plans with Isadora and Thomas, she had left an hour ago.

"No. I need to do your makeup." Marlene said, dragging her onto her own bed and took no time to start applying her eyeliner. Within a few minutes she was done and Eleanor was impressed that she did so well so quickly. "Now I'm ready." She told her, pulling her up and the three exited.

"I like her new style." Mary said, laying back on Lily's bed.

"Me too. I haven't seen her so genuinely happy in a long time." The redhead replied, catching Edith's attention.

"I thought she usually was that happy." Edith said, frowning as she stared at the door. Of course, they had only just met but nothing she read about the Westbrook's would indicate an unhappy life.

"That's what she wants you to think, even me." Lily told her, sighing slightly. It was hurtful that her best friend couldn't even open up to her, she needed to find a way...  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After a quick stop at Scrivenshaft's Quill shop to collect some essentials for Dorcas, the group departed to Zonko's so Marlene could pick up a present for Sirius. The other blonde still didn't know what to get the boy, if she was honest. In a brief exchange at dinner, she knew James had got him a watch, per tradition, Remus had gotten him hair care products with a stash of chocolate because Sirius kept stealing his, and Peter had gotten him a broom care kit. Leaving the girl in a last minute predicament. Nothing came to mind, except one thing.  
  
  


_"And what muggle invention would that be?" Eleanor asked the fourteen year old boy as they sat at the edge of the dance floor, not being successful at sneaking away yet._

_"A motorbike of course! One that I can fix up myself. I think I'd look pretty good in a leather jacket. You know, one that you can put all the cool patches on." He said cockily, a hand running through his hair._

_"Please. No one in their right mind would get you a bike, especially not your parents." She reminded him, causing the boy to pout momentarily. "But you could pull off the jacket."_

_"Oh really? You'd be all over me." Sirius said with a wink, she simply rolled her eyes at the boy, trying not to blush._

_"If I get you a jacket, will you stop whining about getting a bike." El offered._

_"Maybe, maybe not. Depends if I get a kiss with that jacket." He spoke and she immediately scoffed at the boy's antics._

_"In your dreams, Black." She retorted and he smirked. "Fine, you'll go without. Enjoy the boring fashion." Eleanor said to get a rise out of him. He chuckled and shook his head._

_"You and I both know that I have the best dress sense here. So, with or without the jacket, you'll still be all over me." Sirius repeated._

_"You're so annoying, you know that, right?" She said and he nodded smugly. "Fine, one day I'll get you a jacket. Until then, you go without."_

_"As long as I get that kiss, I'll gladly wait." He added, going to pick up his drink when a bread roll hit his head, making him gasp dramatically._   
  
  
  
  
  


With that, she knew what to get him and hoped he hadn't got one for himself. The three entered Zonko's and Marlene went straight for the products she wanted. The three broomsticks closed at three and she wanted Eleanor to try a butterbeer, since it was her first trip to Hogsmeade and all. She waited by the door, looking at a random stand of items to keep herself occupied.

Since leaving their dorm room, she had had a lot of stares from a various range of people. Unlike every other time, she felt comfortable in her own skin. Past the point of pissing off her father, what was the point of carrying on her pristine parade when that wasn't her. She fidgeted with the sleeve of her jacket as she zoned out, thinking about the events of the last few weeks. Lily was right next door again, which was helpful but knowing her father nowadays, she didn't want to rope the girl into that mess.

Finally, Marlene was finished and the trio left, linking arms with Eleanor in the middle. They were heading towards Westbrook Mugglewear when a group bumped into them after they exited Honeydukes. Standing before them was the last person El wanted to see: Violet. Marlene instantly tightened her grip on her friend, not wanting her to spark chaos.

Caprice rudely let out a mocking laugh, as she scanned the appearance of the three girls. Whereas, Georgia skulked behind and was already fed up with her friends behaviour. She crossed her arms over her chest as she stared at the floor, so she didn't have to witness the other twos antics.

When Eleanor realised that Violet's things were sprawled across the floor, she pushed away from Dorcas and Marlene and went to pick up the items in front of her.

"Don't touch that!" Violet shouted and the girl backed away immediately, not in the mood for this. They waited until everything was picked up and Violet stood in front of Eleanor. "Well. Are you not going to apologise?" Marlene and Eleanor couldn't hold back their laughs at her obscurity, even Dorcas' lips twitched upwards.

"And why would she do that?" Marlene asked, finding it hard to stay serious.

"Because you should have been looking where you were going, freak!" She shot back in Eleanor's face, taking in her appearance.

"You should apologise for that outfit too," Caprice stated, causing a smirk to pull at Violet's lips. "Honestly, I can see why people only like you for your body when you dress like a whore." She added, catching the girls attention and she frowned out of confusion.

"Weren't you two prancing around in your underwear, the other night?" El shot back and she saw the way Georgia smiled at that.

"That's not the point. We don't dress like that everyday." Caprice replied confidently but it was just making her look worse.

"Shut up, Caprice!" Violet snapped, glaring at her errands girl, knowing that she was making her look bad. "Just apologise and we can move on." She said with a bittersweet smile.

"Fine, I'm sorry. Have a nice day." Eleanor said, smiling sarcastically as the three girls all moved past them, leaving Violet to strop as they entered the shop. Even from inside the shop, they could hear Violet shouting at Caprice.

Looking around, Marlene instantly pulled Dorcas to look at some band t-shirts as the blonde roamed further into the shop. Each piece in the shop was custom made by whoever owned the shop, in a way to help small businesses and drive prices up for her father.

"Ah, Ms Westbrook!" A polite voice spoke as a plump woman exited the back room, holding her hands up to hug the girl.

"Mrs Burke, it's lovely to see you again." She said, being engulfed into a large bear hug by the motherly woman. Eleanor had known her for two years, since she decided to become part of the chain, adding one of their shops to Hogsmeade.

"Don't you look wonderful!" She said, admiring the outfit. Reminding her much of a young Marie. After a brief pause, she continued. "How can I help you today, dear?" The woman asked, clasping her hands together.

"I was wondering if you had a leather jacket, a men's leather jacket." Ellie spoke hopefully, looking around. The clothing here was mostly for Hogwarts students, so it was her best hope. A grin appeared on the woman's face before she trotted away, delving deeper into her store.

Within two minutes, she came back with two options, both from the back of the store. One had a vintage look to it and the other was quite sleek and modern, she instantly knew to opt for the vintage one. It would look much better with the patches.

Taking the jacket from the woman, she examined both the front and back before being satisfied.

"I'll take it." She said, with a nod of Mrs Burke's head, they both headed to the counter to get the item priced up.

"That will be twenty seven galleons." The polite woman told her after boxing and bagging the item. She paid and grabbed her bag, preparing to leave. "El, you must come for tea some time." Mrs Burke said, walking the girl out.

"Of course I will, Mrs Burke." Eleanor agreed, standing by the door.

"Please call me Dotty. Mrs Burke makes me feel old." She said with a brief laugh, see the woman was only fifty three and had lived a full life. Sadly, she was unable to have children of her own and had turned to fostering as many young witches and wizards as possible. She knew a broken child when she saw one and Eleanor fit that category. Her wife (although it was not official under muggle laws, the ministry had no problem with them being registered as married) was a baker and had her own shop down the road. The two had travelled the globe together, worked as aurors for twenty years, took care of people and the world. Now, they had settled down in a little cottage on the outskirts of Hogsmeade and were currently looking to adopt now their schedules were not hectic.

"Sorry, my bad. I'll try and come next month. Make sure you say hello to Marie for me." She said, giving the woman a farewell hug. The other two had joined her and they left, linking arms once more.

"I didn't know, you knew Mrs Burke." Marlene spoke as they walked. "I still remember going there for the first and she gave me an umbrella for free because it was pouring down. She's a life saver!" She told the other two, making them giggle at her passion.

They entered the three broomsticks, a few familiar faces around the room. Marlene went to the bar to order drinks as she and Dorcas slid into a booth. Placing the bag under the table and away from prying eyes, she looked up to see Dorcas staring. She raised a brow at her, urging her to speak.

"I was just thinking that twenty seven galleons is a lot for someone you met less than a month ago." The brunette spoke up, she couldn't blame her though, Lily didn't even know that she had known Sirius since she was six.

"I've known him much longer. Plus, it's my father's money, it is better spent on my friends then him waging in on some muggle war." Eleanor explained mindlessly, not really spilling any information to the girl. That's when Marlene came back with the drinks, passing Eleanor hers first. Taking a sip, she scrunched up her face and the sweetness. Not sure if she enjoyed it or not. The blonde beside her simply laughed at her reaction before taking seat.  
  
  


♱  
  


_Alone. Surrounded by the thick layers of trees and foliage, it was bland. They were dead. Skeletons of where nature once bloomed. Rattling in the harsh winds, branches began to snap around her. The ground was cracked due to the dryness, nothing could survive here. Somewhere that everything came to die._

_Slowly, she swivelled on her heel, a figure looming in the distance. A woman. She stepped closer. Someone who looked weak, like they hadn't eaten in years. Boney, meek, troubled: she hobbled towards her. From a dot, to a blob, to a shadowed figure, to a woman._

_Her._

_Staring at her own, corpse like, face. She froze, not knowing what to do. Her double was dressed in a fancy ball gown that flowed in the wind as she walked and was paired with a pair of ballet shoes. For a second, she wondered which part of her this was._

_The part that her father wanted._

_"Look at you." Her double spoke, stepping closer to her. A snarl sprawled across her face as she took in Eleanor's appearance. "Your father wants the best for you. But you're too weak to try. As soon as things got tough, you blamed everyone around you. Leaving me to die." She spoke angrily, lurking forward with each sentence._

_"I am_ **not** _you." El replied solemnly as she crossed her arms over her chest. "And I never will be."_

_"That's because you're scared. You refuse to be selfish. Where did that get you? Nowhere. You wallow in your own self pity because, deep down, you that you could never become me. Powerful, in control, your true self." The corpse of her own self spoke, looking unimpressed._

_"Why would I want to be you? You're sick. A disease I buried for a reason. My father doesn't want what's best for me but for himself." Ellie shot back._

_"Naive. That's what you are. If you looked past that wall of hatred, you may see that he's not entirely wrong. All it takes is the right reason." She told the blonde, a wicked smile pulling on her lips. "We could do things together that others will never pull off in their lifetime. We can be great. Your deepest desire could be yours."_

_"I don't want power. Power comes with responsibility." Eleanor reminded herself, causing the corpse to freeze. "I didn't want you before and I definitely don't want you now."_

_"Eleanor." The corpse spoke but it was contorted as she stepped closer. "Eleanor." It wasn't her double speaking anymore, as the corpse charged towards her. "Ellie!"_

Shooting upwards, the blonde gasped. Feeling as if the corpse had passed through her. She hadn't remembered a dream in a while and that was far too strange for her to comprehend. The forest looked familiar though. That she knew for certain.

"Come on, get up. It's half past one already! You'll sleep the day away, it is Black's birthday." Lily told her, as she made her bed for the day.

"And I thought you didn't like them." Ellie said, grabbing the close from yesterday and slipping them on as only Lily was there.

"I like Remus!" She stated defensively. "But I make an exception to be nice on their birthdays." The redhead explained as she collapsed on her freshly made bed.

"So what are the plans for today?" Eleanor asked from the bathroom as she fixed her hair. Examining her appearance in the mirror.

"I'm not quite sure. The boys have been playing pranks all morning, I believe we are spending the evening with them. Remus is ill so there's no party this year. After Halloween, i'm glad." She said and El was glad too. The only good thing that came from that night was her getting closer to Marlene. A massive weight off her chest had been lifted temporarily.

"Sounds good. I'm surprised you're so willing to go though." El said. "Nothing to do with a certain boy named Potter, is it?" She teased, walking out of the bathroom.

"Oh, bog off!" Lily said, rolling her eyes sarcastically as she threw a pillow at the blonde. The girl was hit square in the face, making her squeak and Lily burst into a fit of laughter.

Until she threw it back... Twice as hard.  
  
  


♱

"Thank you." Remus coughed after she gave him another drink of salutem exhausit. He had been feeling a bit wheezy after their pranks, so Peter came to fetch her.

"Come on. We can't keep the princess waiting." Eleanor said, making the boy grin as she helped him up. They were heading to dinner then having cake and presents in the common room. Unfortunately, the boys were out tomorrow because of the moon so Sirius suggested having close friends only.

The two descended the stairs and left the common room, meeting the group outside the Great Hall. James looked between the two with an anxious look but was soon settled by Eleanor's light nod.

She skipped around the others, who were chatting, to go greet Sirius. As she hadn't seen him all day, she felt a little guilty. When she reached Marlene's side, she noticed the boy was talking to Violet by the doorway. An array of presents in his hands. For once, she couldn't read his body language; he was either bored or tired, she found that oddly strange.

Finally, he finished his conversation and headed back to the group, causing Ellie to look away. A hand grabbed hers, circles being drawn on the back of her hand in comfort: not like she felt she needed it but it was nice. Raising her eyes, she notice the multiple rings that belonged to Marls and the small -stick and poke- tattoo that said 'fuck you' on her middle finger. One that Eleanor had done herself.

"Let's go eat! I'm starving." James announced, taking the lead with Lily close behind.

"Can you believe it? THE Lily Evans is having a civilised conversation with James 'bane of her existence' Potter." Marlene whispered into her ear and the blonde let out a small giggle in response, as Remus joined their side.

"I bet 2 galleons that they'll be dating by seventh year." She said to both of them, not really bothered about lurking ears.

"What makes you so sure?" Remus asked, not very convinced by that proposal.

"You haven't seen me work my cupid magic yet. All in good time, Lupin." She told him as the boy shook his head at her antics. A second later he held out his hand and shook on the deal.  
  


Pulling away from Marlene's grasp, she walked slower than before. Deciding that this was the closest she would be to being alone with him today. The presents had vanished from his hands as he used magic to transport them back to his dorm. He seemed slightly nervous when she stood by his side, he didn't know what to expect. To be honest, she didn't even know what she was going to say either. Looking up to meet his eye, she smiled slightly at him as she watched the nerves flush out of his hands and face.

"Happy Birthday." Eleanor said simply, feeling as that was the most adequate opening on such an occasion.

"I was worried that you had forgotten." He replied cheekily, a grin growing on his face as he watched her face light up. Shaking her head at him, she looked to her feet then back at him.

"No, just sleeping. It will be a long night tomorrow." She said in a hushed tone. Although Eleanor had helped Remus the other night and today, the boy had almost forgotten that she knew.

"Why do you stay up anyway?" Sirius questioned, not sure if he was even told the reason to begin with.

"Last month was for Celine. Anyways, I knew about Remus the day I met him. The signs are very obvious. So, I waited up for him too." She told him honestly but he looked confused. Letting out a small sigh, she played with the sleeve of her jacket. "Celine is one of my best friends back home, she happens to be a werewolf. So we helped in any way we could." Eleanor explained as he scanned her, realising why she looked so different to him.

"New style?" He said after a moment of silence, causing the girl to frown but then smile.

"Oh. Yeah! Marlene let me borrow some of her clothes, I was trying to see what I liked, you know." She told him as they both sat down at the Gryffindor table.

"I think it's hot." He whispered in her ear. Immediately the tips of her ears became a violent red as her face was plagued by a bright blush. Goosebumps ran from her ear to her thigh, making her shiver. For a second, she thought that she had made that up. Until he laughed lowly at her reaction. She thought about internally combusting but that would make a right mess.

Dinner didn't take long to arrive, plates full of pizza, chips, onion rings and other sides appeared in front of them. Peter and James high fived behind Remus' head causing him to glare at them both - Eleanor took not to give him a stronger dosage. It clearly had something to do with the boys as everyone else had been served the traditional food. None of them wasted anytime tucking into the food though, as if they were a hungry pack of lions that hadn't been fed.

Reaching for the pizza in front of her, she came to a standstill when Sirius had gone for the same piece. She looked at him for a second and he did the same before she retracted her arm and waited her turn, choosing to grab some chips while she waited instead.

The pepperoni seemed to deplete the quickest, obviously being the favourite of the group, and so did the chips. Ellie kept to her ham pizza though, it was her favourite. The only other eating a different kind was Delilah, who was vegetarian, but only a slice had been eaten.

When pudding came, Eleanor had a slice of chocolate tart, one of Remus' recommendations to the girl, and it was delicious. She couldn't eat anymore and was thinking about the run she'd have to go on tomorrow to burn all of this off. Balancing her fitness and food was key for her to keep going.

♱

"Hurry up!" Marlene moaned, flopping onto Lily's bed as she waited for the girls to collect their presents. They had stopped by the Hufflepuff common room beforehand and Eleanor headed into the kitchen to greet Tink, showing Lily how to get in. 

Eleanor had slipped off the heavy boots and replaced them with fluffy red socks. The others had changed into comfy clothes, including Lily, but El couldn't be bothered to change. She threw her hair into a high ponytail, pulling out the baby hairs to frame her face. Lily had braided her own hair whilst Marlene had thrown her hair into a messy bun.

"Shut up. You took half an hour because you hadn't wrapped it yet, even though you had all day to do it." Lily scolded which resulted in the blonde throwing up her middle finger, making Delilah and Eleanor snicker together. "Don't you start, yours isn't wrapped either." The redhead reminded El firmly. 

With a roll of her eyes, she picked up her wand and placed the present in front of her. Swishing her wand, the box began to hover as silver wrapping paper encased the present and a beautiful bow placed on top before falling back on her bed. Pristine. Her lip pulled into a small smirk as the other three stared at her.

"Did you just-" Lily said after a moment of silence, she blinked, not sure about what just happened before her. It was impressive though, that she would admit.

"Done." Eleanor told them as if nothing just happened, she jumped up with the present in her hand and pulled Delilah up with her. The other two followed suit as they descended down multiple flights of stairs. After walking all the way from the hall to the common room, the last thing you want to do is climb up more stairs but they were right at the top!

"I- But she used a non verbal, just to wrap a present. Who has the time to learn?" Marls spoke to Lily behind them as they reached the common room. Four figures slunk across the seats already. Marlene and Lily pushed past the two, Lily taking the arm chair by Peter and Marlene sat in the corner of the sofa. The only available seat was by Remus. 

When Delilah realised, she paused for Eleanor to take the seat but the blonde went to the other side. Leaving her to snuggle in between James and Remus. The bespectacled boy grinned to himself, leaning over to Marls to whisper something and they were both grinning. With the only place to sit being the floor or someone's knee, she chose the latter, knowing the floor would be nippy on her -practically bare- legs. 

So, she sat down on Marlene's knee, throwing her legs over James so she could rest her back on the arm. He looked up at her, as if she'd kicked a child, and she smiled sarcastically in return. The boy pouted like a toddler before turning his attention back on the birthday boy. Marlene had been oddly quiet after letting her sit there, El paid no attention though.

In front of them, the fire roared and spat, scorching the hundred year old rug below their feet. Shadows had sprouted around the room, they were all peaceful in that moment as they discussed Quidditch, something that only El didn't like. She leaned back, admiring the woodwork above. It was more fascinating to her then the current conversation. The only other that wasn't participating was Delilah, she was clearly trying to stop herself from saying something that she'd regret. For once, Remus seemed to be the calmest of the group. She had told him to finish the drink and she hoped that it was working. Nothing was off. Well, she couldn't feel if anything was off actually, so she took that as a good sign.

"Okay. We've made him wait long enough. Who's going first?" James said, sitting forward in excitement. Obviously the most excited to gift his present. No one said anything, forcing Remus to sit up and grab his because he was the closest. 

"Happy birthday." He said, passing Sirius the present that was poorly wrapped in brown paper. There were two separate packages, she assumed to keep the edible option away from the other. The boy quickly shredded the paper from the first, looking over the bottles of hair product that he was ever so fond of. Everyone watched him with a light smile, glad he was overly joyed. It didn't take him long to move onto the next present. As soon as he saw the chocolate, he let out a breathy chuckle.

"I'm guessing you realised." Sirius said, highly amused by his own antics. Remus nodded before rolling his eyes. "Stolen chocolate tastes so much better though." He added, crumpling the paper in his hand before throwing it into the crackling fire. 

"Just like stolen alcohol or-" Eleanor added, making Marlene hum in agreement. Unfortunately, Lily had thrown a pillow at her head before she could say anything else, obviously Lily didn't want to ruin her good girl reputation. She kept her lips sealed but that didn't stop her and the blonde below her from laughing, Delilah joining in which utterly confused the girls.

Both Lily and Delilah went next, they had both chipped in for a thick band, silver ring that he hand told them about. It was £40 so the girls went halves on the present, not knowing him as well as the others. 

After them, Peter handed over his, giving him a pat on the back, wishing the boy on a happy birthday. It was nice. Eleanor had been passed a bottle of butterbeer, from James, and she sipped on it slowly. Thanking Peter for the present, he scanned over the presents and was over the moon with what he received. He wasn't quite sure what else was to come.

Hopping up, Eleanor took that as her que to go. She grabbed the present from the side of the chair and made her way over. All she could think about was him hating the jacket. Sucking in a sharp breath, she handed him the very large box and he frowned, hoping that she hadn't gone over the top. Instead of heading back to her seat, Eleanor sat on the arm of the chair - by his side. 

Sloppily ripping off the paper, he froze when he was greeted by a sleek white box. Everyone was intrigued. Only Dorcas actually saw what she had bought, making this a surprise for the whole group. Pulling off the lid, he examined the jacket. Everyone had leaned forward to see what it was. A smirk was quickly growing on the boy's face. She remembered.

_She remembered!_

Wasting no time, he threw on the jacket and luckily it fit him. He examined the details and the colour, checking for any inconsistencies. Once he was satisfied, he jumped out of his seat and flung the collar back. 

"How did you even remember?" He questioned, confusing the others. The boy approached the mirror, looking himself over. Instantly becoming like a giddy child in a sweet shop, he turned back and waited on her answer. 

"You were pretty persistent through the years." Eleanor replied, getting off the arm to head back to her seat. The rest of them were pretty lost but would get them to explain later. He again admired the leather, still in slight shock. This was not what he expected. He had upheld his end of the bargain all these years and was tempted to buy one with his own money this Christmas, now he didn't have to. Then he remembered. A smirk graced his pretty face.

"What about that kiss." Stopping dead in her tracks, she turned to see that devilish smirk that made her stomach somersault. There was silence. All the group looked between each other, they were all as shocked as the other. None of them actually knew about their friendship before Hogwarts, though the way they acted around each other made it obvious. 

Rolling her eyes, she moved towards him. She saw the initial shock in his eyes and that prompted her to grin. The confident facade came crawling back though. Cockiness exuded from this boy in an unhealthy amount. _Maybe that's what makes him so different from the other boys_ , she thought. 

One hand grazed over his shoulder whilst the other kept her stable, against him. Slowly, she leaned in. If a pin dropped, you'd be able to hear it. For a second, it was just him and her. She genuinely thought about that, it didn't scare her. They were so close, she could feel his breath tickle her flushed cheeks as the adrenaline clogged her senses. Mere centimetres from his pinched lips, she knew there was only one way. Moving swiftly to the right, she kissed his cheek and moved three steps away. A 'woop' escaping from Potter's lips. 

"Happy Birthday, Sirius." Eleanor said with a giggle, making him wish that their lips met. An interaction that lasted less than a second felt like minutes for the two but she sat down again with a lump building in her throat. To cool her fiery skin, she had sat on the floor by Marlene's legs. 

Lily caught her flustered attention and mouthed 'You are going to tell me everything.' The redhead really meant everything as well. 

Once Marlene had given her gift, James jumped straight to his feet. The boy pulled a small box from his pocket. Just like before, the group observed in silence. Waiting to see what he was going to be given. According to James, this was going to be unmatched to any other gift that night. All of them had high hopes.

Like every other present, he pulled off the wrapping with ease and chucked the paper in the fire. It was black felt box with his initials engraved on the side. James could hardly hold back his smile as he watched the boy intently. The boy that he considered a brother.

Sirius popped open the lid of the box and stared at the item speechlessly. He knew what it was as he raised one hand shakily, grabbing the small item. A silver pocket watch. As tradition, a wizard would receive a watch on his seventeenth birthday as a coming of age present. The boy, however, did not expect to get one. That wasn't all though. He closely looked at each swirl and each dent of the -clearly old- watch, appreciate every inch of the item. Opening the metal, he revealed the classic face, each number careful carved into a roman numeral to represent each hour. 

"This is from me, mum and dad." James finally spoke up, no longer holding back his smile. "It is my grandad's watch from mum's side, we wanted you to have it. Now, you're officially a part of the Potter family." He said, watching Sirius' jaw slowly drop. Without a second thought, Sirius pulled James into a tight hug. Holding each other as the boys held back their happy tears. Patting each other on the back, James spoke once more. "Happy Birthday, _brother_."


	9. a splash of supremacy

**_chapter nine_ **

「 _a splash of supremacy_ 」

♱

Politeness is the first thing people lose once they get the power.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _WINTER CALLED CLOSE_** in the month of November. Places around the country were preparing for the worst snow storm in over a century. Shops shut, bars barricaded, cafes closed. Street life as a whole had come to a sudden stop. Even nature had dwindled down to a minimum. No one could bare the cold that was sucking happiness out of the world. As birds migrated and squirrels hibernated, the world as they knew it seemed so quiet. For most, the silence was peaceful, it gave them a break from the chaos accumulating around them but for those like Eleanor, nothing was more deadly. Cooped up for hours on end, constantly around others, or left with her own thoughts: El was plunged into her worst nightmare with school work being her only distraction. Lily had being making it hard for her to sneak away for a drink or a smoke, El didn't know whether to thank her or slap her. At this rate, it was going to be the latter.

To be fair, the weeks had passed swiftly along and the end of the months was days away. Luckily for her, Jinky hadn't even said a word to her since the incident but she got some nasty glares thrown her way instead. She hadn't been asked to demonstrate since then, a part of her itched to show off once more. The look of shock on everyone's faces gave her a thrill like no other. Power. Everyone had that craving once in a while, right?

Going between groups became a norm for the girl. Although, she had convinced Edith and Dorcas to join the group often - Eleanor and Marlene visited them in the greenhouses or in the forest to help with the animals. The blonde had a nack for both, so the two found it strange that El hadn't taken care of magical creatures or did the bare minimum in Herbology. Marlene could probably guess why. Lily and Delilah would spend time with Isadora and Thomas -who Eleanor had only briefly met- whilst they were with the others. A part from them, she was with the boys, obviously. The last full moon was the best Remus had ever had, he believed it was the serum that El gave him. If only he knew the truth...

The work load was triple the amount to October and, thanks to Lily, she was keeping up fine with all of it. With the odd detention, Eleanor was a fairly good student. She had gained more house points then she had lost, so that was a plus.   
  
  
  
  
  


Today was only a short day. Potions at eleven, followed by a single of transfiguration and charms. Eleanor felt like she was always in potions. Since her partner was Dorcas, she didn't mind. A splendid way to spend her Wednesday. Not. Monday was the worst though, without a doubt. Plus, the boys would be there to cheer her up after potions.

Since the start of the year, her appearance was more of a mess but she enjoyed the freedom. Yes, her skirt was shorter and the sleeves of her blazer were rolled up, that was all minor but in her mind she was discovering herself, in which ever way she wanted. Whether that was the good way or not was a separate issue. From the hair, to the shoes, to the perfectly pressed shirt and tie: all of that stayed the same. With the thigh high socks, of course, that would always stay the same.

Walking down the rows of students, she found her friends at the Hufflepuff table with Isadora and Thomas. Just like Marlene, he was hopped up on energy and never missed a moment to make someone smile. The awkward bookworm wore large rectangular frames with ultra thick lenses, his sight was far worse then James Potter. Surprisingly, when you got to know the boy, he was very shady - loved slipping in a sly remark. One time in first year, a girl looked at him wrong and he despised her since. He had thick floppy hair that covered his forehead and his pimples. His small hazel mouse eyes were magnified by his thick lenses, making him look strange without his glasses. { _ **A/n**_ : Thomas is actually based of my actual best friend, hate him.}

Picking up a pastry and a pear, she started taking a bite of her fruit knowing that classes where minutes from starting. Both Lily and Marlene where finished with whatever they were eating and Delilah was finishing her apple. The latter of the bunch looked like she had just stumbled out of bed moments prior. She tied her laces before downing her water, she and Marlene stood up knowing they'd have double detention if they were late. The marauders followed after them, they were brewing potions today. Their favourite.   
  
  
  
  
  


Once the lesson had concluded, she was straight in transfiguration to learn conjuration. A part from human transfiguration, it was supposed to be one of the hardest areas in the subject. El didn't agree with that though, witches and wizards practice conjuration throughout the years without even realising. Nevertheless, this was just a recap and they were going to build on what they already knew. After that, they got to learn about things like the animagus form. Something she looked forward to.

Sitting with Mary towards the back of the classroom, the lesson had just began and, like every transfiguration lesson, the boys were late. Whilst everyone pulled out their notes, four figures burst through the door. All shoving and laughing as they automatically headed towards their seats. Sirius slid into the seat by her side, followed James. Remus had sat by Lily before James could and although the redhead loved the boy, she had a twinge of disappointment present on her face. Something, only the blonde picked up on.

"Late, again." McGonagall said, observing the two boys that were still nudging each other. "What's your excuse this time?" She scanned the four before choosing one to answer. "Potter, care to enlighten me."

"Of course, Minnie. You see, we were going to be on time but we were battling a dragon. No, we were cleaning up the sea, it is horribly damp this time of year! Actually, my dog wasn't himself this morning so I stroked him for a while." James explained elaborately whilst the other boys snickered at his responses. "You can decide which one you want to go with." He added before patting Sirius lightly on the shoulder, as if he was consoling him.

"Ten points from Gryffindor, Mr Potter. Detention tomorrow night for all four of you, since you have been late three times in a row." McGonagall said but there was no complaints from the boys as she walked back to her black board, notes already being scribbled across the board. Though, Lily seemed to care as she shot James a glare, only to receive a wink in return. El had never seen her get so red so quickly before.

Much to Eleanor's disappointment, this class had quite a few Ravenclaws in it which meant Violet was also there. That girl had not gotten off of her case since Halloween, it was pretty amusing to the blonde at this point. One thing she noticed was how kind Violet got when Sirius and his friends were around, she was close to slipping up in front of Remus thought. That had made El's day, a week ago. Just to irritate Violet, the blonde sat with the boys anytime they were near. They didn't mind, especially Remus. Apparently he couldn't stand Violet and he was one of the least judgemental people that El had ever met.

Currently staring daggers, Violet had been staring at the blonde since Sirius had joined her side. Once Ellie had spotted her, she did the only rational thing and decided to piss her off some more.

"Do you want to tell your girlfriend to stop staring at me." Eleanor said to the boy at her side, her eyes only flickering on him for a second before returning her attention back on the board.

"Huh? Which one?" Sirius replied, earning a small laugh from James. He stopped writing to look at her, wondering what the root of this was.

"Violet." She told him, still writing down McGonagall's past three statements. Being a slow writer was going to be the death of her one day or at least the death of her hand. The boy cast his glance to the topic of conversation, who smiled at him kindly before she turned back to Georgia, and slowly turned back to El.

"First of all, it is not like that and, secondly, she probably isn't even looking at you. Why would she?" He returned blankly. Although he wasn't wrong, he wasn't correct either. Even he was questioning his own words, there is plenty of valid reasons to be staring at Eleanor in particular.

"I think you need to tell her that, she's been acting this way since the two of you were sucking faces on Halloween." Eleanor said, lowering her voice so only he could hear. Come to think of it, she wished she had kept her mouth shut now.

"Jealous?" Sirius replied smugly. _Yes, no, she didn't know_. "I'm sure there is enough of me to go around." He added, making the girl finally look up from her work to see the teasing smirk on his lips. Immediately arching a brow at him, she felt the need to throw her -very heavy- textbook at his head. She didn't though.

"Your full of yourself, Black." Eleanor replied before turning back to her scroll as McGonagall was most definitely seconds away from giving her detention, suggested by the impatient frown she held on her -usually neutral- face.

"Come on, Ella, you know you can't resist me." He said with a snicker, causing her head to shoot back up. Before she could say anything that would embarrass herself, she was interrupted by McGonagall that had been watching the two this whole time.

"Mr Black, Miss Westbrook. Need I remind you that you are in lesson, not at a social event. Detention tomorrow night." She told them. Great. This is exactly what she needed. More time for Sirius to tease her, without anyone else around. He returned to his work, smiling arrogantly as he knew full well that their Professor was on the verge of giving them detention. Huffing sharply, she whacked his arm to wipe the smirk off his face but that only made him laugh.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


Charms had gone by quickly, thanks to Marlene, and the three girls had headed back to the Hufflepuff dorms once Lily and Eleanor had changed. With whatever limited items that Eleanor had, she was able to pull together a lot of new looks with the help of Marlene. Hopping back to her old style every so often to mix it up a bit. She wouldn't dare ask Annabeth for any close in this new style of hers, instead she wrote Dotty a letter with a bit of money and got some pretty good pieces in return.

They all piled into Marlene's dorm, which was very different to that of Gryffindors. Eleanor much preferred the looks of this common room then her own. Mixes of soft and vibrant yellows merged nicely with the mossy greens of the foliage and grey stone. Everything was quiet bright and spring-like to say they were in the basement. Instead of dark oak floors, the light wood was covered in layers of rugs making the place seem homely. Even Marlene's dark aesthetic blended with the room.

Today was simple. Wearing a plain white jumper with a black pleated skirt, large fishnets, thigh high sock, her Dr Martens , and a belt to accentuate her waist. This was what she currently felt most comfortable, plus she kept warm in the icy corridors. 

No one exactly knew where Delilah, they assumed she was in the gardens with Isadora before they were no longer accessible. She had Astronomy with the others, bar Eleanor, Mary and Edith, later that night as they were observing and both classes were pulling together for the project. They had hoped to meet her at dinner but sometimes she didn't bother to show up.

"Is Dorcas and Edith coming after Astrology?" Lily asked as Marlene got ready in the bathroom. She was flicking through her charms book, trying to remember the incantation to the new spell they were trying to learn.

"I was talking to Dorcas in Care of Magical Creatures earlier, she told me they were. Edith will be with Eleanor anyways because of our night class." Marlene called through the door, walking out a moment later in her buckle boots -the ones El had borrowed- black jeans, a Led Zeppelin shirt and a leather jacket. Very different to Lily's blue flares and bright red polo shirt. 

"Least it is not at ten o'clock, like in Summer." Lily said with a sigh, getting up so they could head to the hall. Marlene hummed in agreement, picking up her wand off the night stand. 

Just as they were about to leave, Delilah came stumbling through the door drenched in her own sweat and very out of breath. She was in a hoodie and a pair of leggings, her tight coils had been been pulled into a ponytail with a few strands framing her face. 

"Oh hello." She greeted them, heading straight to the bathroom. "I'll join you in about ten minutes, I just need to shower." Delilah explained before disappearing and the sound of water running was heard. The three looked between each other, all of them equally as confused as the other.

♱

"Come on, Moony. Do it. We need to test this out, there is no need to stress! I mean, we've already missed astrology, McGonagall can wait." James said to the boy, holding an old looking parchment in their hands. 

"Fine. If this doesn't work this time, we'll come back to it later." The boy caved, knowing James wouldn't take no for an answer.

"Wormtail can do the honours, since he found the spell." Sirius added, patting the smaller boy on the back as they all surrounded the folded parchment. With a nod from James, Peter pulled out his wand and cleared his throat.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." Peter spoke clearly before tapping the paper. They all stared in anticipation. Nothing. Frowning lightly, James did a three sixty of the parchment. Nothing.

"Lets go." Remus said, taking the paper from the other boys hand and placed it on the bed closest to them. Proceeding to move, Peter stayed back for a second. He wanted to know why it had not worked, what had they done wrong. 

"Are you coming, Pete?" James asked from the door, watching his friend. Instead of replying, the boy picked up the parchment as his jaw dropped lightly. He opened it up and his eyes dazzled in delight. Using his free hand, he beckoned James over and the bespectacled boy was momentarily speechless. "Holy fuck. We did it." He expressed, looking at the moving footsteps. The common room showing to hold many students, including Sirius and Remus at the bottom of the stairs. "We have to show them." James tugged on the boy and they both came crashing down the stairs, almost taking out a poor first year on the way. 

Boyish grins on both of their faces, the other two were utterly confused. That was until James shoved the parchment in front of them. 

Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot & Prongs 

are proud to present

_The Marauder's Map_

Opening the pages, something instantly caught Remus' attention in the left wing of the castle. He paused for a moment, kind of hoping the map was lying. Using one finger, he pointed at the spot of gathered students knowing there was trouble. Once they all saw what was happening, they glanced between each other as they tried to think of the quickest route there. McGonagall could wait.

♱

Spending an hour or so in the library with both Edith and Mary, it was time to go meet the others. They had planned to spend their time wandering the corridors or sitting in one of the window seats till curfew as none of them had work to do. It was just something to do on a long Wednesday evening. The three skipped through the halls mindlessly, waiting at the bottom of the astronomy tower and where soon joined by the rest.

Like most school evenings, the group was tired beyond belief. That left Marlene wanting to boost the mood. As the group trudged through the halls, they collectively got happier as they talked more. Faint laughter and soft spoken words, the teens didn't want to disturb the tranquillity of the hour. 

Both Marlene and Eleanor took the lead, followed by Edith and Delilah, then Mary, Dorcas and Lily. The two blondes were linking arms -as always- and were nattering about the new song release from Queen, one of Delilah's favourites and the others had naturally grown to love them too. Although the blondes were more into metal, they never opposed other genres. Especially if their friends were into them.

The group rounded the corner to their spot, only to see it had been infested by others. Ones that Eleanor had gotten to know far too well for her own liking. They were everywhere and no where, with something opinionated to say. The minority that gave a whole house a bad reputation, based of the prejudice that came from the side that proclaimed to be 'good'. 

Unfortunately, Eleanor had the displeasure of knowing most of them - even if it was just by a recognisable last name. Most of their families were accomplices or clientele of her father's vast range of businesses, which had really kept the blonde from being antagonised by them unlike her other friends. She received a glare or two, even a mocking laugh when she passed by, but the only one brave enough to talk to her had been Avery. Although, he mostly kept his distance too. 

"They're not even on the seats, let's just go sit there. I'm sure they'll leave soon." Lily urged them forward, not wanting to be discouraged by a bunch of -mostly- teenage boys. With that, the group proceeded and carried on their usual conversations. Until the two blondes came to a halt. Evidently, they had caught the attention of the pretentious group as a few had moved in their way, blocking the corridor. Eleanor was not in the mood. 

Besides Avery, there was Mulciber and Rabastan. It was quite typical for them to always be together. They could cause more harm that way and receive less backlash.

Shaving off the majority of his hair was best for his facial structure, having unruly hair predicted his psychotic humour, hence his lack of it now. His eyes were hard as stone in an onyx shade, nothing but evilness pooled from him. He was sly and deceptive, able to weasel his way out of any situation. He had a generic build and was a generic height. When people crossed Mulciber, his height and weight was the last thing they worried about, even in the halls of Hogwarts. The boy was light-skinned and wore a silver piercing that held a real diamond to flaunt his wealth. Rabastan was utterly bipolar without having the disorder. Like Mulciber, he was emotionless. Never caring if he hurt people to get what he wanted, he acted like he was above the law and never received consequences because of his family name. His family infiltrated the ministry, occupying the top jobs, making him untouchable. Eleanor had seen another side to him. When it was just him and Avery, he seemed human and lacked his god complex. He'd been kind to El, helping her out. Did that change or excuse what he'd done? No but it had proven he was capable of that change. He was hypnotising, which helped him when he was in trouble, people tend to go easier on pretty people. Icy eyes that reflected his frozen heart, followed, watched and preyed on those that dared to cross him. You never knew what to expect. His families values predicted his next moves. 

What was more intriguing were the people behind them. There was the Carrow twins, Barty Crouch Jr, Jovan Wilkes, Vox Travers, Severus Snape, some that were far too young to be there and Regulus black.

Regulus was different. He wasn't like his brother or his friends, he was a timid boy, keeping to his small circle of Slytherins that his mother had advised him to befriend. He looked more like his mother compared to Sirius. Unfortunately for him, he hadn't grown as much as his brother. only reaching five foot nine which was pretty average for a boy. Holding the signature black curls and dark grey eyes, the boy never knew where he belonged. Pressure from his parents, pressure from his friends, pressure from Slytherin. Then he thought of his brother, Sirius. Was he making the right choice? That is something that would forever haunt him.

Eleanor had seen Severus with them, a lot, but was still confused over the matter. For one, he was still friends with Lily and those that he was stood with now wanted everyone like Lily -or those she associated with- gone. Since they were children, he had been odd. Particularly when the two girls spent time alone, like Eleanor was going to steal the redhead away forever. She found a way to block out his incessant whining.

"What do you want, Mulciber." Eleanor was the first to speak up, folding her arms over her chest as she waited for his response. He had just finished snickering with his friends, probably about something crude, and she watched his face harden like stone. 

"Could ask you the same. Appearing in places your not wanted. That's what your good at though." He replied monotonously, the blonde thought she was going to fall asleep on the spot. Her friends seemed to be taken aback by the comment but she was used to this by now, Verner really lacked any diversity in his come backs. 

"Just like you I suppose. You've got so many opinions on others but can't even hold your own life together. It's kind of sad, really." She simply responded, knowing that boy could give but not receive. The others knew that too as Lily tugged her arm, trying to inform her that this wouldn't end well. Instead, El raised her right brow, daring him to continue. 

"They should be honoured really, good advice is hard to come by." Avery stepped forward, being directly opposite Eleanor, with a glint of mischief in his bright blue eyes. Flickering between the two, she landed on the blonde who's eyes hadn't left her since the group had approached. 

"When you have some, let me know." Eleanor replied with a sarcastic smile, causing Marlene's lips to twitch up and down as she tried to hold back a laugh. All eyes shot to Marlene, except Avery's who seemed to be having a stare off with Eleanor.

"Even a blood traitor too. Look at this." Mulciber spoke after scanning the faces of the other girls, getting far too close to Mary for the others liking. The rest of them came to join the scene, the Carrow's beginning to snarl like dogs. 

"Is this supposed to be intimidating." Marlene spoke, trying to keep a serious facade but a grin kept slipping onto her lips which only caused Eleanor to start laughing. That only angered Mulciber, not used to losing. 

"Take a look at this. Even Higgs and Meadowes are with them." Wilkes called to the other boys, after rounding the group. It was only concerning to the blonde when she saw Severus humming along. She could feel how tense the two Slytherins were but backing out now was not an option. 

"How disappointing, Higgs. I'm sure your father will be pleased." Travers' spoke up for the first time, joining Mulciber's side, as if he wanted a better view of the two Slytherin's. Out of them all, he was definitely the most chilling out of the bunch. El had heard stories of the seventh year and how he was already a death eater. A vicious one too. Proving his loyalty by slaughtering ten muggles. What made him even worse was his addiction to Marlene. He'd never acted upon his thoughts but the day would probably come...

"No. I don't think he will." Eleanor said to him, catching him off guard. He scoffed, looking around at the other boys who were quite confused. "Well, you won't say anything. Not with your families jobs and welfare on the line. That goes for all of you." She added, confidently. Though, he didn't seem to think much of that statement.

"I don't think you input is worth much to him, princess." Avery said smugly as he gripped his right elbow with his left hand, twirling his wand around his fingers. He had edged ever so slightly forward, towering over the girl. He must have been the same height as Remus, maybe even taller. 

"I promise you, it does. All that I need is a media threat, he'll crumble." She shot back, ignoring the flustering feeling that the nickname provided. Lily had gotten the instinct to leave, regretting her choices to come this way, but didn't know how to discretely get the rest of their attention. "Besides. If you cared to notice, having the whole wizarding world know that he's recruiting blood purists is bad for business. All your families could be gone, like that." Eleanor told them, clicking her fingers at the end. 

"Now, if you'll excuse us." The redhead spoke through the heavy moment of silence, tugging both blondes to leave. Her eyes locked on Severus' for a moment before she turned away.

"That's it, you listen to the mudblood." Mulciber jeered, getting a laugh out of them all. Including Snape. Both blondes stopped in their tracks as Lily swallowed the lump in her throat, knowing exactly how this goes. Swivelling slowly on the ball of her heel, Eleanor pulled out her wand from the band of her skirt. Marlene had drawn her wand too.

"What was that?" Marlene quizzed, rhetorically. She just wondered if he was brave enough to say that to her face. The boy licked his lips, letting out a mocking laugh with the others. His eyes looked the two blondes up and down hungrily before he pushed off he wall and walked closer. Avery and Rabastan not far behind, the others watching from a distance. Lily had told Mary and Delilah to get the two Slytherin's out of there, making sure they are safe. Which left only three of them. 

"She heard." Mulciber stated, eyeing up Lily. "Mudblood." 

In a moment of anger, Lily surged forward. Her wand piercing the surface of his skin, just under his jaw. There was a look of fear that coated his glassy eyes as each side raised there wands to their opponents. Faint steps were closing in on them as each side stared challengingly, wondering who was going to make the first move. No one did though, Lily backed away as she calmed herself. Making Mulciber laugh.

"Pathetic." He spat. That's when it started. A red ball flashing out of Lily's wand as she whispered, 'stupefy'.

Without hesitation, Eleanor did the same before Avery could. Through the flashes of bright colour, she could still see his dangerous smirk. They both cast and deflected spells, trying to help their friends as much as possible. That was the problem, neither side was bad and, so, it was hard to get a hit on the opposition.

Until now. Remembering back to her DADA lesson, less then a month ago, Eleanor cast her flipendo charm on an unsuspecting Mulciber. Non verbal. This sent the both flying down the corridor, completely stopping the fight. Everyone's attention was now on the groaning floor, the Slytherin's full of shock. They knew that wouldn't be the end. 

A hand, one that bore a cold metal band on their finger, grasped onto the girl, causing her to look away from the scene she had just created. Sirius. He was holding a large piece of folded parchment and his wand was already drawn. The other boys had done the same. James had gone straight for Lily, checking if she was hurt and for once the redhead didn't object. The other two had joined Marlene as Travers crept forward, along with the rest of them. 

So, they all raised their wands once more. Knowing that group would be out for revenge. Yet, they were disrupted once more. The clicking of heels, the high pitch laughter, the trudging of heavy boots, and the meow of a cat. Filch's cat. Looking down at the scruffy tabby cat, both sides knew exactly what this meant. Those at the back of the Slytherin group had already dispersed but, before Eleanor could, Avery had tugged her over.

"Don't start something that you can't finish." He whispered into her ear, sending chills down her back. His grip was tight around her wrist as their bodies were pressed together. He was looking over her shoulder, smirking at whatever he saw "This isn't over, darling." Avery finished, dropping her arm and walked away, as if nothing happened. The boy helped Mulciber up and deserted the corridor. 

Her heart thumped loudly in her chest, as she examined her wrist that would definitely be bruised tomorrow. The only thing that knocked her out of her chance was Marlene's constant calling. Turning around, only Sirius was left standing there with his jaw clenched, staring at her sharply. The tapestry swung behind him as two figures rounded the corner. Rapidly running over to him, he revealed a tunnel for her to go through and she did. He followed in after. 

Barely able to see in the cobweb covered corridor, she followed the orb of light further down the tunnel -she presumed that was James'- and almost tripped over the scattered stone. Luckily, Sirius was there. He kept a hold of her to prevent her from falling the rest of the way. If it wasn't for him, she would have definitely gained a black eye down there.

The group stayed in utter silence, all the way back to the common room and even then it was only a few mumbles to say goodbye, the boys had detention after all. To James, it was definitely worth it. Apparently, he had provided Lily with great comfort on the way back and she was even wearing his jacket.

"Ella." Sirius called when she was about to go back to her dorm, she just wanted to sleep now. "Are you alright?" He asked, scanning over her sombre face. The blonde nodded with a small smile, yawning immediately after.

"Yes, nothing I haven't dealt with before." She admitted, looking down at her hands then back at him. A few seconds past and El spoke up again. "I better go check on Lily." She said, pointing up the staircase and he nodded. 

"Yeah, I've got to go too." He told her and with one last glance, they went their own ways. Sirius followed after his friends to detention.

Eleanor entered her dorm that was once again overflowing. The two Hufflepuff's and the two Slytherin's chatted quietly with Alice. Mary had disappeared to get ready for bed and Lily was sat with them all, but not really.

"Come on, it has been a long day." Ellie spoke up, grabbing Lily's hand and she pulled her up. She was already changed in her pyjamas, minus James' coat that she had put back on, and Eleanor tucked her in bed. The blonde sat there for at least two hours, just holding Lily until she fell asleep. There was no use talking to her in this state. 

Most of the others had gone to bed too when El had gotten up to change. She hopped over sleeping figures that were on the floor, resting on enlarged pillows as she entered the bathroom to get ready for bed. A groan escaped her lips when she remembered that she had detention tomorrow, making it another long night. She just wanted to lay in her bed.

When she got back, there was something on her pillow that had not been there before. Picking up the note, she climbed into bed and grabbed her wand. Casting Lumos, there was nothing on the paper. Then something happened. Letters slowly began to appear in a fancy handwriting. The note proceeded to read:

_Dear Ellie,_

_Since the truth is unknown,_

_I must tell you the truth about your throne._

_If it is answers you seek_

_Then one must look to the Greeks_

_For they know about you and me._

_Only the truth will set you free._

_Look for a book titled beautiful mystery_

_In which you will find your history._

_\- H_


	10. detention

**_chapter ten_ **

「 _detention_ 」

♱

There's nothing scarier then silence.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _AS THE DAYS_** got shorter and the nights got longer, the school day took up their only time to do anything, really. The series of storms had arrived in the early hours of Thursday morning. Starting with the pitter patter of rain, by ten o'clock the sky was roaring and the wind was blowing a gale. Branches snapping, leaves spinning, windows being battered, animals hiding, mud churning: nothing stood a chance against the down pour.

Thick black clouds coated the entire sky, swallowing any colour that ever existed. Minus the flash of purple, every other minute or so. Nothing was more terrifying to the Westbrook. Almost like she was being drained, it was practically impossible to leave her bed. So, as the storm rolled in, the sheets rolled up. Keeping herself hidden from what out lurked outside, she didn't even bother showing up to her classes. To be honest, not many people enjoyed this weather, especially after the heatwave they had that summer. It was a real damper on the approaching holiday spirit. Everyone preferred the snow.  
  
  


_"Back so soon." A voice instantly called out to her as Eleanor's vision finally focused. As she looked around, she noticed the barren trees and the deathly silence. The place was seriously familiar to her but in her unconscious state, she had no idea where from. All she knew was that she had definitely been before, Eleanor was 'back'._

_"Who's there?" Ellie questioned, scanning the surrounding area. The skeleton-like scenery was perfectly still, as if it was carved from stone. With the sound of a twig snapping, her head shot to the figure that blended -far too well- with everything around them. Only this time, they were cloaked._

_"Oh, Ellie. I knew you couldn't resist. Maybe we're not a lost cause after all." The other one called out, walking towards her. The blonde examined the ghostly figure and her feet impulsively dragged her forward. Out of curiosity. "A step closer to our destiny." Herself giggled lightly, the bony hand grasping onto her shoulder. Comforting, she had done something right._

_"What destiny?" Eleanor asked eagerly, taking another step closer to her other self. She was far too impatient today. Receiving that cryptic note yesterday was enough mystery for her. The secrecy just added to her predominant stress._

_"That will come later. First of all, you need to find yourself." The corpse replied, smiling lightly at the girl. "Once you do, everything will fall in its rightful place." She instructed, leaving the girl far more confused._

_"How do I do that?" El questioned, loosing any real thought that she had before. Nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Being kept in the shadows all her life had left her torn: on her friends, on her family, on herself. And trying to divide what is real and what were her own lies was practically impossible, it was a blurred line. She was being dragged through life, barely surviving over the next obstacle as they got larger and more dangerous._

_"Listen to that note. Your key to everything lies on that page. Beautiful mystery. I heard they have that in the Hogwarts library. Only when you find the truth can I guide you." She answered, observing the space around them, like something was coming. A moment passed, the two stood silently. A crack of thunder. A storm was brewing. "There is another thing." The corpse spoke again, the bony hand moved across her shoulder blade and stopped in front of her heart. "Listen to this. Let the ones you love in, a heart break is suffer-able compared to the pain you hold now. People love you more then ever but they have to watch you fade away, they can't do anything because they don't know anything. They don't know you, anymore. Your not hurting yourself anymore, your hurting me too." She finished as the clouds above began to cry, followed by a crackled scream._   
  
  


But the rumbling thunder came from outside. The blonde blinked, sitting up from her mostly peaceful slumber. No one was here. She had already missed half of her lessons today as it was eleven o'clock already. After making sure Lily was alright, she hadn't got much sleep. Spending most of the time trying to figure out who 'H' was, she hadn't given the content much thought. Until now. Once the storm was over, she would go and ask Madam Pince.

The girl was glad that she got to stay in bed, the thought of actually going to lesson made her want to evaporate. This year, she hadn't been to bad but last year El had countless 'sick days' as everything got too much, she simply did nothing. According to her friends at Beauxbatons, that was not a common occurrence in people and they believed her to be lazy. That was not true though, she often had motivation, just not now.

Sinking lowly into her bed, she stared at the ceiling, admiring the small details around the room. Usually, Eleanor would take this time to read but for some reason this storm was far worse then all the others. She was constantly on edge, trying to be a little bit prepared for whatever comes next but she never was. Today, she was on the verge of throwing up because the nerves were that bad which paired well with the forceful stabbing pains across her body. Something she was used to during this weather but they were far more painful. Curling up into a ball, the pain dulled momentarily as she flinched because of the loud boom. As she pulled the blanket over head, the curtains around her bed snapped shut. Blocking the intense flashes from getting her. With a body doused in goosebumps and a fever scorching her skin, she just wished the storm would end soon. Yet, the pain kept growing, until it stopped. Plunging her into darkness.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Waking once more, drenched in her own sweat, she groggily arose. The silence was kind to her, no longer did it threaten her with her demons, and it presented a moment of comfort. Peeling back the curtain, she realised that the school day had ended and so had the storm. Evidently, the girls had been by as their uniforms had been ditched - apart from Lily's who had neatly folded all of hers. With that, she fixed her bed from where she sat before proceeding to stand up. Her whole body felt numb and her legs gave way under her, she was only sat up right because her back had landed on the side of the bed.

"El?" Someone came jogging out of the bathroom after hearing the crash. The redhead came into view, smiling softly. "What are you doing? Why are you out of bed?" Lily asked quickly, checking to see if the blonde had sustained any injury.

"Lily, I'm fine." She advised which earned her a slap round the head. "Ow. Well, now I'm not. Good Godric, women. Do you do bloody weight lifting with those books of yours?" El whined, grabbing the back of her head as it pulsated. The feeling in her body finally coming back to her.

"That's what you get for lying." Lily said, arching a brow at the blonde who pouted. "Merlin, your acting just like Potter." She expressed, examining her best friend.

"Oh, I knew you loved him!" Eleanor boasted with a cheeky grin on her face and Lily gasped at such a claim, not knowing where that came from. Of course, the redhead was in denial. You couldn't blame her, starting to like her childhood friend's bully. Not the greatest look on her part.

"Don't be barbaric. He has nothing-" Lily tried to defend herself but she was interrupted by the blonde who began to laugh. Knowing full well that she had no defence, the redhead kept her lips sealed in favour of winning this battle. That wouldn't happen, she knew Eleanor would never drop this, never mind if she was correct or not.

"If me and James are alike, that means you must at least like him as a friend." Ellie proceeded to tease her, smirking lightly to herself.

"I said you were like him because you were pouting like a toddler, just like him! Besides, somebody already asked me on a date and I said yes." Lily replied to her, folding her arms across her chest. Technically, she hadn't said yes but the offer was there. Now she'd have to say yes.

"Who?!" Eleanor asked excitedly, her eyes lighting up at this new information. Yes, Lily definitely regretted saying something. She stuttered on her words before she looked away.

"You look a mess, come on. You should shower." Lily deflected, making the girl scoff. The blonde didn't push her though, knowing she didn't want to say anything. With the help from the redhead, she got up and headed into the bathroom to get ready for dinner and then her detention. A faint taping could be heard followed by Lily beckoning the blonde. Once she came back, Lily handed her a little cardboard board box. Frowning lightly, she opened the parcel to reveal an apple turnover and a little card.  
  
  


_Dearest Ella,_

_Lily told us you wasn't very well. Maybe this can help._

_No pumpkin pasties in sight :)_

_-S.O.B_   
  
  


_And the girl couldn't stop the grin that infected her face..._   
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Madame Pince." Eleanor said, walking towards the desk that the librarian sat. A short-tempered woman who was overly protective of the books and, as such, quite unpopular among students. She was mainly seen by students as an obstacle to research, but she was professional nonetheless, helping students to check out books and by finding information for them. While stern bordering on the extreme, she was fully capable of appreciating students who did respect the rules, behaved prudently and showed an interest in learning and reading. The woman looked up from the pristine muggle novel and once she noticed that it was Eleanor, she smiled fondly. Nodding at her to continue. "I was wondering if you had a book-" She paused for a moment, knowing this would be a dead end. "It's called, beautiful mystery."

"Sounds familiar, let me check." She told the girl, neatly placing down her copy of Wuthering Heights as she moved towards the record log. Within a minute, Pince turned back to her. "Yes, I have the book. Though, it is in the restricted section. You need a not of permission before I give you it." She told her, picking up her book. "Anything else I can help you with."

"Oh, erm, no thanks." Eleanor said awkardly, shifting on the spot as she pushed away from the desk. Not knowing what to do. Apparently teachers aren't so lenient when it came to giving out permission for restricted books, plus this was for out of subject issues. Sure, she could steal the book but how?

Her feet trailed across the old stones as she thought of a plan, the truth lied within. Pince was there from six am to eight pm, giving the girl a short time slot. Curfew was ten pm to six pm, so she needed to get around the castle unseen too as she had detention after dinner. One thing came to mind but it seemed a bit rude to ask him. Sure, the two had gotten closer over the past month but that was a large favour. She wasn't certain that she was supposed to know. Conventionally, she could just ask Sirius about it, then she would have to explain everything. From the weird dreams to the random not, she couldn't. Not yet. She only knew so little herself. If she asked James, he wouldn't question her if she told him not too. _Maybe we are alike_ , she thought with an amused grin.

Eventually arriving at the hall she planned to ask him after. She took her seat between Remus and Lily, waiting no time to dig in. All she had eaten was an apple turnover, she couldn't wait to pile her plate full. Dinner at Hogwarts was far different from Beauxbatons, the meals certainly reminded her of her mothers cooking - even if that was burnt.   
  
  
  


_"We are cooking dinner, it is good for the girls to learn basic skills!" Florence announced. Finally shutting the man up. This woman was his only weakness, the two would argue frequently and Florence won every time. If she didn't, he would be kicked out of the house. That happened on multiple occasions, especially when he had shouted at Eleanor for something ludicrous. To this day, everyone wondered how and why the two stayed together. It was simple really: love. Maybe from an outside perspective that wasn't the case but the two clung onto the memories of their teenage romance._

_"Fine. As soon as this messes up, we're using magic." Conan sighed in defeat and the meal failed horribly. Instead of cooking, the family ended up having a food fight. El was covered head to toe in flour, potato smeared across Ada's cheeks, eggs cracked into Conan's hair and a pea shell hanging off of Flora's lips. In that moment, they were an actual family. Even the blonde had gotten along with her father as he held her tightly in his arms as she popped the yolk on his head. When they felt loved. All of them._   
  
  


Dinner was done and Eleanor wasted no time, she walked down the isle and waited outside the doors for the group. A pit forming in her stomach as she waited to ask. She wasn't sure why she was so nervous, it always boiled down to her fear of rejection though. Tapping her foot lightly, El stood there as the group of Slytherin's passed, eyeing her up with smirks on their faces. As if she was the pray and they were the predators. Luckily, James exited a moment after.

"James." She shouted, waving him over. He frowned momentarily before jogging over, saying goodbye to the other boys.

"What's up? Don't you have detention to get to?" The boy asked, a small smirk creeping up his lips at the reason she was there.

"That's why I wanted to ask you now." She said, exhaling sharply. James raised his brow at her, edging her to continue. "I need a favour."

"And how can I be of service to The Eleanor Westbrook?" He teased, causing the girl to roll her eyes.

"Can I borrow you cloak, tonight. Please." Eleanor said.

"What? Like my robes or the invis-"

"The invisibility cloak, James. What would I want with your robes?" She replied, cutting him off in a bored tone. Always one for dramatics, he gasped, offended.

"Watch your tone, Westbrook, your asking me for a favour." James said smugly, puffing out his chest slightly. "But yes, you can. May I ask what for?"

"No."

"Alrighty then. Lets go get that cloak before your late, Missy." He informed, taking the lead. She rolled her eyes at him, following after him as she sprinted to catch up with his long strides and the two ascended the stairs.

♱  
  
  
  
  


Arriving at exactly eight o'clock, she found the black haired boy sat on the desk with a bucket by his side. He looked up as soon as she entered, a massive grin on his face. What she wanted to know is why the boy was so happy to be in detention. Giving that a second thought, she remembered that she was in detention because of him. Throwing that textbook at his head now seemed like an adequate response. Plus, it would shut him up. In her books, that is currently a win/win situation.

"Why are you so happy, Black?" She asked, dropping the cloak on the table. Wearing a tight blue, red, and yellow turtle neck with some dark blue flares, she decided to keep her outfit casual today. Eleanor could make any boy nervous in any outfit. 

"I have my reasons." He replied, jumping of the seat. "Minnie has gone to a meeting, so Filch will be coming to check in every so often." 

"What are we doing then?" El sighed, looking around to see the desks had been pushed against the walls.

"Washing the floor." Sirius told her and she simply just blinked. At Beauxbatons, all she did was write lines. The boy watched as her mouth fell and he couldn't hold back his chuckle to her reaction. 

"Can't they just like- use magic." Eleanor blinked, utterly confused 

"Oh yeah, I'm supposed to take your wand too." He added, practically blanking what she had just said. The girl scoffed and raised a brow at him.

"That's too bad. I'm keeping it." She shot back, making him smile as he picked up the bucket and threw her a hand held brush which almost flew straight past her head. 

"Don't complain when Filch takes it from you." Sirius said, dipping his brush into the water and began to get to work. Rolling her eyes, she placed the wand on the table by the door and headed back over. Copy what the boy was doing with a pained expression on her face.

An hour had passed and not many words had been shared, expect for the few occasion where Filch popped his head in and snarled at the two. She was already tired, cleaning was her least favourite thing to do, especially without her music. Dropping the brush, she sat up right and stretched as her back had began to ache. When her eyes fluttered around the room, she noticed the boy was already staring in her direction. She wasn't sure what because he had averted his eyes but she was certain that it wasn't her face. 

"Was this really worth getting us both detention." Eleanor groaned, resting her head against the table as he did the same, at the other side of the room. He dragged the bucket towards him, dipping in the large sponge. In a split second, something had hit her head which had dampened her skin. She looked down to see the sponge.

"It was now." He replied, flashing a cheeky smile her way as she gasped. Picking up the sponge, she prepared to throw it as he got another from the bucket.

"Oh, your dead now, Black." She said laughing, throwing the sponge at him and it hit his torso. The boy grunted and he was throwing one back. Both ran, ducked and covered; the war zone of water had soaked the floorboards completely. "Is that your best?" Ellie teased, appearing from behind a table as she held both sponges. Cocking his brow, the boy picked up the bucket as he edged closer. In that moment, El knew she had fucked up.

"Do your worst." Sirius challenged as he crept forward, cornering the girl. Narrowing her eyes, she only had one plan of escape. Quickly throwing both sponges, she attempted to run but was pulled back, by the waist. Before he could only pour the water on her, she pushed the bucket and drenched both of them. She squealed at the cold liquid that trickled down her back as the boy shook his wet hair like a dog. Their eyes locked and she knew that she needed to run, only for her to slip on the wet floor. That was not her brightest idea, especially when Sirius had landed above her. 

Faces nearly touching, she held her breath as she turned redder then her bestfriends fiery locks. The room was silent as her heart pounded in her chest, gulping softly. He hovered just above her, one hand beside her head and the other just below her shoulder, on the other side, as he had stopped himself from fully collapsing onto her. Then his eyes scanned up her body until he met hers, licking his bottom lip quickly. She could've sworn that a firework had exploded inside of her.

"Mr Black, Miss Westbrook." McGonagall's voice called out from the doorway, the two looked over to find her and a smirking Filch. The blonde shivered at the thought of him watching them. Sirius was the first up and pulled the girl up beside him, mumbling a drying spell which their Head of House frowned at. "Ten points from Gryffindor. Each. Your dismissed." She explained and Sirius did not care as he tried his hardest to control his smirk. The two gathered their belongings and shuffled out, Eleanor leaving his side with the cloak in one hand. 

"Where are you going? Trying to get rid of me so soon." Sirius said, faking a pout like Potter. She giggled softly and shook her head. Throwing on the cloak, she became a floating head and the boy blinked. 

"Stuff to do, I suppose." She said before completely disappearing, leaving the boy dumbstruck in the middle of the corridor. 

♱

Tranquillity. What the girl desired after the loud start to the day. She had broken into the restricted section and was scanning the 'b' section. Most of the books here were chunky and thick, she would never know what to read. After a good ten minutes of searching, she finally found what she was looking for. Beautiful mystery. It was very thin, only a page or two in their. 

Pulling the book under the cloak with her, she examined the condition of the book. Tens of pages had been ripped out. Great. This was a start though. She sat on the wooden counter top and began to read, casting lumos beforehand.

_Throughout my years of research, I have never found such a fascinating species as this. From the depths of Atlantic ocean to the forbidden forest, they populate in every region of this world. Yet, no one has a clue who they truly are, until now._

Unfortunately the next few pages had been whited out, leaving the page completely unreadable. The girl continued on the next page.

_There has been no record of them, only starting to pop up in the British wizarding community, forty years ago. What do I know about them? They are divine beauty, someone of the most attractive to grace this Earth. They are the protectors of this world, of the people and nature. They have seen to be powerless-_

More blanked out words, somebody was clearly trying to hide what these people where. The girl turned the page, coming across a word that was engraved into the back cover. Pausing for a moment, her finger traced over each letter. A - N - T - H - E - I - A -N. Antheian. She had never heard that word which caused her to frown. What could this mean?

♱

Returning to her dorm, she would return the cloak tomorrow. Alice and Lily were talking together as Mary painted her nails, the blonde collapse on her bed with a sigh. Glad this day was over. Even though she slept through most of the day, she honestly couldn't wait to sleep again. Thankfully for her, it was Friday tomorrow. The weekend was finally here!

"How was detention?" Lily asked, all three girls were now staring at the blonde as she rolled over on her bed to face them. Trying her best to hide her smile, she placed her head into the covers.

"It was alright, she had me scrubbing floors with Black." She replied, acting disinterested.

"Sirius? You were in detention with Sirius?" Mary asked, quite confused. She had been so busy with quidditch practice that she hadn't been keeping up with the group. If she wasn't practising, she was far too tired to do anything.

"Yeah, that's why she wasn't wearing a bra." Lily said with a wide smirk, throwing her the bra she had left in the bathroom. Eleanor knew she had forgotten something when she left the dorms, usually this fact wouldn't have bothered her but she knew Lily would never let this go. Her face light up a bright fuchsia and hid her face immediately.

"El!" Alice squealed, laughing with the other two. "In detention. Really?" She quizzed in shock, making the other two giggle.

"What. No!" Eleanor expressed, throwing a pillow at Lily. She now was called Lily 'the instigator' Evans. It was fine, though. An hour earlier, the redhead had been sat on the roof with Potter and they both made a deal to torment their friends. El made it so easy too. "I would never do such a thing." The blonde said, fluttering her eyelashes innocently. Her best friend let a snort so hard that she began to choke on air. "That's what you get, whore!" She called out, making Lily laugh even harder that her ribs hurt.


	11. etiquette

**_chapter eleven_ **

「 _etiquette_ 」

♱

There is October in every November and there is November in every December! All seasons melted in each other's life!

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_Disclaimer:_ ** _any song used in this book is definitely not my own. any modern songs used (in the actual story) are intended to be written by the characters but full credits go to the original owners of the songs._   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_JUST AS THEY_** were promised, the snow had started to fall a couple of days before December had begun and the worst of it was yet come. From the first years to the seventh years, everyone was excited to finally have snow. It was only shallow last year and everyone was hoping for a white Christmas. With this came the news of a ball, one hosted every year for the older students, and none of them had stop talking about it since, apart from Eleanor. She was pretty used to them, except for the fact that she got to be with her friends. All in all, the mood had skyrocketed over the course of the few weeks. One thing that had really sparked talk was about who was going with who. Everyone was sticking their nose into each others business. Though, this had brought the girls closer together, she had talked to Isadora a lot and kindled a new friendship over the months. To be honest, it had created mayhem amongst the students, especially the girls and the pressure was on for those asking.

The blonde had already been asked, multiple time but she said that she would get back to them. Something at the back of her mind was stopping her, it was never the right person. Lily had been asked by the boy she went on a date with a week ago, she still wouldn't tell them who it was. Alice and Frank were going together and Mary had been asked by someone on her quidditch team. No one else in her group had a date, yet.  
  
  


"Personally, I don't think you have to worry, Remus." Eleanor told her herbology partner as they observed the restrained bouncing bulb, making sketches and taking notes. "There is plenty of girls that want to go with you."

"Yes but which ones, it is not exactly easy to tell. They're usually after Padfoot or Prongs- I mean, Sirius and James." Remus explained, looking down at the table with a sigh. She looked from the boy to his two best friends -who were currently prodding the bulb- and although the two of them never acted on the attention they got from girls, she could sympathise with the boy. Often she felt below the girls, maybe not when came to men but definitely in every other aspect. Its hard to be perfect around perfection. In no way was she saying the two boys were perfect, she had heard enough stories to know they weren't, but she had seen the countless interactions with the girls around school.

"I think you should ask Delilah." The blonde got straight to the point, knowing this is where she was going.

"W- Why would I do that?" He stuttered slightly, caught off guard by her suggestion. "Sure, we have like- sat next to each other before but I don't know her and-" The boy tried to worm his way out of it but Remus was quietened by Eleanor who held up her hand up to him.

"Please! You make it so obvious that you like her, with your side puppy dog eyes. Honestly, anyone could see it, maybe that's why you have girl trouble." Eleanor teased, making the boy illuminate a bright red.

"Its that obvious? Wait- so does she know?" Remus asked cautiously, not sure if he wanted to know the answer to that.

"Of course not. She is the most oblivious person that I've ever met. Actually, you are too. Perfect for each other, if you ask me." El said with a laugh.

"How am I oblivious?" He shot back with a huff, frowning lightly at her.

"Besides the fact that you don't know who those flowers come from every month, I have never seen you aware of anything relevant that happens to you or those closest to you. Like, didn't you notice that some Ravenclaw was sleeping around with Slytherin's but didn't even realise that Lily has been wearing James' jacket for the past month." She informed him and the boy blinked, digesting the information. Then his jaw scrapped the floor, causing the blonde to laugh.

"Lily wore what? For a month?!" He exclaimed in hushed tone and El nodded slowly. His lips twitched up into a smug smile. "When we're studying tonight, she will not hear the end of that." Remus added and she shook her head at the boy. What she had noticed was the close bond Lily and Remus had, even though she claimed to hate the marauders. She saw the side eyed glances James gave around the two, he would never admit it but sometimes it pained him that he wasn't that close with her. "And what do you mean? How the fuck did you even find out who it was?" He asked.

"Your a very smart boy but you lack a level of common sense, don't you?" She said with a small laugh, earning a nudge from the boy. "Have you ever tried asking who has access to the gardens?" Eleanor said, closing her book as their Professor began to dismiss them.

"Well- no." Remus thought out loud.

"Then maybe you should start there." She whispered when passing him before heading out the door.

"What was that about?" James questioned as he stepped forward with the other two boys, each with curious faces.

"Are you up for a mini adventure?" Remus asked, throwing his bag over his shoulder as he jumped up. The boys looked between each other as they smirked, rushing out the greenhouses and following after Remus.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  


Upon hearing rumours of the fight, a few weeks ago. Adelaide had took it upon herself to keep and eye on that group of Slytherins. They had shared many hushed whispers in the common room and had even asked the girl to join them at lunch, she politely declined. From what she had heard, the didn't necessarily seem like bad people as most of their families worked for her father but she hadn't heard Eleanor's side. Not like she would for a while, Annabeth had advised her to stay away from the blonde for the time being. She knew that she shouldn't have left her on Halloween of all days but she wanted to stay on her fathers good side, no matter how selfish it was.

With the upcoming ball, she and most of her friends were not allowed to go. Her friend, Clem, had been asked to go by a quiet boy named Rowan, a Slytherin in the year above them. Emmeline had asked Caoimhe to go with her, leaving Ada to be the only one left out. There was one person she would want to go with and definitely wouldn't be able to now. None of them would stop talking about the ball, especially Emmeline. Although, Ada got the idea that the girl did that out of spite.  
  
  


Taking her pill for the day, Ada had exited her dorm room. Leaving Clem to talk with Edith and Dorcas, the two had not got along with her since befriending her sister which Ada believed to be ludicrous. Sure, she made some bad decisions but nothing they should judge her on. _They just don't understand,_ she thought as she entered the common room.

"Oi, Adelaide." A voice called as a slender boy jumped off of the arm of the leather sofa, walking away from his friends to cut off her path to the door. Avery.

"Can I help you?" Adelaide asked, feigning a degree of politeness like she had been taught. The boy smirked slightly before continuing.

"Has anyone asked you to the ball yet?" He asked, catching her off guard. She immediately shook her head, allowing him to continue. "Come with me, will you?"

"And why would I? Isn't it you who is constantly flirting with my sister?" She deadpanned, hearing the mumbling laugh of boys behind her. The boy let out an amused huff as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Because your the only pureblood, that I know, and one that isn't a blood traitor." Avery explained simply, if he were honest Ada wasn't his first choice but going with a Westbrook would look good for him and his family. "Just one dance and then you can go." The boy explained and she paused thinking this offer over, she was going to say no but this could work out in her favour. 

"Okay. Sure." Ada confirmed and walked around him, heading to the hall. There was a message to pass on to Eleanor, apparently she hadn't replied to Annabeth's last letter and was worried that she hadn't got it.

Upon entering the hall, she spotted the Gryffindor at her table surrounded by most of her friends. Adelaide made a b-line to the table and tapped the blonde on the shoulder. Turning her head, the girl's face pulled into a light from as Ada beckoned the girl over. They stood at the end of the hall, meters away from the empty teacher tables and close to the marauders. Eleanor could feel the eyes on her.

"What is it?" Eleanor asked, crossing her arms over her chest. Wondering what she wanted to say to her after a whole month of ignoring her.

"Annabeth m'a envoyé une lettre disant que vous ne lui avez pas répondu, avez-vous reçu la lettre? [Annabeth sent me a letter saying you did not reply to her, did you receive the letter?]" Adelaide asked her, feeling a sense of awkwardness to be saying this.

"Non." Eleanor simply replied, intrigued by what she had to say.

"En gros, elle s'attend à ce que vous pratiquiez votre ballet. Elle a supposé que vous n'aviez pas pratiqué depuis septembre et s'attend à la perfection à votre retour. [Basically, she expects you to practice your ballet. She assumed you haven't practised since September and expects perfection when you return.]" Adelaide summed up, sucking in a breath.

"Bien sûr qu'elle le fait. [Of course she does.]" She responded sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Où suis-je censé pratiquer? [Where am I supposed to practice?]" The blonde questioned, talking to herself more then her sister.

"Il y a une ancienne salle de divination que je pourrais vous montrer. Si vous déplacez les sièges, vous les pratiquez. [There is an old divination room that I could show you. If you move the seats, you practice them.]" Adelaide said observing her sisters distress. "I have to go, though. Meet me outside of here after dinner." She explained. "Faites attention à ce que vous mangez, Annabeth vous pèsera à la maison. [Be careful what you eat, Annabeth will weigh you at home.]" The brunette explained with a lack of emotion, even though it made her physically sick to do so. She knew the girls history. Face visibly dropping, the blonde gulped and nodded. Then Adelaide left. Again. She turned to return to her friends, locking eyes with Sirius who was staring like he was in the know.   
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


On the weekend, a few of the girls had gathered in the Gryffindor dorm and Marlene had decided that now was a good time to practise in front of people. With a bit of magic, Delilah's drum kit had made an appearance in the dorm and Lily had casted a silencing spell. Isadora, Lily, Edith and Dorcas was sat on one bed with Alice and Mary on their way to accompany them.

Once they had played a few different songs without singing, it was time to implement that. Marlene was the main singer of their newly named band 'etiquette' and had started writing her own song recently. None of them where allowed to see or hear the song until it was finished. Arguably the best singer out there, Eleanor hardly sung in front of people because of the attention it brought, anytime she would sing people would be practically hypnotised. Not in the sense that she was this prodigy -which she was- but the fact something about her voice lured them in, especially men. A siren of the land.

"Who are we playing?" Delilah asked, swirling the drumsticks around her fingers before she grasped them tightly. Over the years, the girls had learned many songs over the years as practise. Marlene had played acoustic guitar from the age of five and switch to electric at twelve, Eleanor learned to play electric at nine and was taught by her mother, Delilah started at twelve when they formed this band but she was a fast learner when it came to anything creative.

"How about a bit of Sabbath?" Marls suggested with a smirk, knowing it was El's favourite to play because she got to do all the riffs and didn't have to sing the chorus like Marlene usually made her do.

{ _Play the song iron maiden by black sabbath_!}

Using the pedal, Delilah started off the slow beat using her bass drum when Eleanor started the first riff, catching Isadora and Edith off guard. Lily had heard them played this song many times before and Dorcas loved the band. The riffs repeated a few more times before the two started to actually play, Marlene preparing to sing into the fake microphone.

"Has he lost his mind? can he see or is he blind?" Marlene began to sing with her amazing voice. The group mainly covered rock bands so only Marlene had to sing, only El could hit the high notes of most songs. "Is he alive or dead? Has he thoughts within his head?The blonde truly loved playing guitar, along with many things it had been a while since she had played and was thankful that Marlene even suggested too. "We'll just pass him there. Why should we even care?"

It was good to play again. For all of them. It was what really bonded them originally. Eleanor's eyes flickered up to meets Marlene's as she continued to play, the two smiling widely at each other before returning to their own actions. Nothing could top the cheers of their friends as they played so harmoniously.

"Nobody wants him! He just stares at the world," Marlene began the chorus, the height of the song but Eleanor knew her moment to shine was coming. "Planning his vengeance That he will soon unfurl." So, maybe Eleanor was biased when she said that they were a band like no other but she truly believed that. Her guitar skills was the only thing she was confident with, that was something she would never let anyone take from her. That last connection to her mother. She deserved this one little thing. "Nobody wants him! They just turn their heads," Marlene repeated the chorus once more and Eleanor prepared for what came next. "Nobody helps him! Now, he has his revenge."

Solo time. Most the time, she would just improvise these but this solo was so iconic to the song that she just memorised the part for weeks until the motion was engrained into her head. It was her favourite part to go off like this, with all jaws dropped and Marlene hyping her up with Delilah supporting on the drums. It was a memory for the books, Lily stood on the bed snapping a few pictures for her phot album. The girls had already filled three books of memories. One just from Milan alone.

"Heavy boots of lead Fills his victims full of dread, Running as fast as they can Iron Man lives again." The blonde finished singing while the other two trailed off, slowly. At the end, there was huge uproar of applauses as they all looked stunned. Even Lily who had watched them play hundreds of times!

"When Marls invited me to come watch, I didn't expect you all to be good." Dorcas joked, causing Marlene to punch her arm lightly as they all laughed. "No but, seriously, that was like the best band I've seen live and I have seen many." She expressed and there was a nod of agreement.

"Ready to go again?" Delilah asked, ready to play another song and that's exactly what they did. Laughing, playing, teasing. More photos to add to their collection. Since she had arrived, they hadn't had chance to really capture any and they would need something to remember when the war came. They knew it would. That was tomorrow's problem though...  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


The next day, Eleanor woke up to a knock on the trap door. She sat up and stretched, rubbing her eyes as she let out a loud yawn before she jumped up on her bed. Lily was already awake and had headed down to breakfast to meet Edith and Isadora, the other two early risers. Only Alice was here, Mary had quidditch practise since after school there wasn't many hours of sunlight to do so. It was about ten o'clock and the sun was trying to blaze through the thick curtains. Quickly casting a spell to style her hair, she climbed onto her bed frame and lifted up the hatch, revealing a crouched down Remus. Immediately putting her finger to her lips, she signalled to the boy that Alice was sleeping.

With a helping hand from Remus, she jumped out the hatch and placed a block between the hatch so she wasn't locked out. The two moved towards the boys dorm and dropped through that hatch, being careful to not mess up Sirius' bed that was under there. The other boys seemed to be out which worked in El's favour as she was only in her oversized shirt and underwear (of course). 

"What is it?" Eleanor asked plopping down on his bed as he leaned on his bed post, his mind running at a hundred miles a minute.

"The other day, you told me to go find out who went to the gardens and I went there and found Isadora. And I was a little confused at first- until I asked her who came here." He began to explain, El's smile getting wider with each word as she knew what was to come. "She said, 'Me, Eleanor and Delilah' and all I want to know is, is it Delilah?" Remus asked slowly and after a moment, the blonde nodded and his face became as still as a stone statue. Then something clicked in his mind as shock over took him. "That means she knows!" He said putting his head into his hands. El immediately moved to his side and placed a hand on her shoulder. "She knows that I am a... monster." Remus whispered the last part as both rage and sorrow consumed him, the full moon was coming soon. 

"Don't be a twat. Do you really think she would have sent you those flowers if she believed you were a monster?" Eleanor expressed, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Now, I have known Delilah for nearly five years. That girl has never judged or treated a person differently for who they are."

"As much as I appreciate you trying to cheer me up, being accepting of humans and werewolves are two very different things." The boy said in a grump, flopping back onto his bed with pouty lips. 

"Dear Godric, Remus. When will you get it in your head that Delilah doesn't care! She knows how bad lyncanthrope is, seen it with her own eyes. Stop making excuses because your scared. That hurts not only but Delilah too." Eleanor explained to him and he sighed in defeat, knowing the blonde was right. "Are you going to ask her to the dance or not? This wallowing is driving me crazy." 

"I- That's the thing. I don't know how to." Remus stated, about to get worked up again. He actually had a chance here and didn't want to mess up.

"I'm here for a reason." Eleanor said, jumping up and she held her hand out for the boy who blankly stared at her. "Do any of you own a record player?" She asked and he nodded, taking her hand cautiously as she helped him up. "Well, go get it."

"You don't have to this, really. I don't want to ask for another favour." The boy responded, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. Plus, he didn't want to embarrass himself in front of a pretty girl, even if he didn't feel that way towards the Westbrook.

"Please, Remus. We're friends. We don't count favours. Also, it will be a great bonding experience." She replied with a wink, making the both slightly flustered as she laughed. Remus headed over to Peter's record player, flicking through the records.

"What shall I play?" He asked, most of these being rock music. The girl came over and threw the first disc she saw on the turntable, lowering the needle to let it play. 

"To be honest, it really doesn't matter. It just makes us less awkward when dancing. There is two ways dancing can go and that comes down to the two of you as any form off dancing with a partner can be intimate or just a good laugh. You only get a good laugh from being a really good dancer or slightly bad, if your awful. That could ruin a night." She began to explain, seeing the horror in his face at the last statement. "But that won't happen because you'll learn! If you can mix a good laugh with intimacy, that will be a night that neither of you can forgot." The girl continued, thinking back to previous dances. 

_"Dance with me, Ella!" The boy suggested, his hand hovering in the air as he waited for her to accept. The fifteen year old stared at him for a moment, they had danced many times before but this may be their last. He had been complaining about his mother and father for a good our and with the healed cut above his jaw she knew that it was getting worse, she couldn't imagine the cuts and bruises he was hiding._

_"Are you sure? Your mother might be kind to you then." Eleanor joked , finishing off the flute of champagne that she had stolen from the waiter. He smiled lightly, letting out a breathy chuckle._

_"I think I can manage the peace for one night." Sirius responded and she took his hand, both heading to the dance floor. With her -golden beige- satin dress trailing behind her hypnotically, she was always the centre of attention on the ball room floor. A Black and a Westbrook. Rumours would spread like wildfire, of children... In this world, only the favourites got to be children. It was no surprise that people gushed over the pair, two powerful families uniting. They were a pawn in this game of royalty and riches. They were just children... Even her father approved of this friendship, saying 'it got those mudblood friends of yours off the front page'. Everything was for appearance. Sometimes, she had to keep to a strict set of topics to stay out of trouble. All aspects of her life were controlled and manipulated. She was just a child..._

_A new song started, at more of a quick pace, and his free hand took her waist as hers gripped his shoulder like many times previous. And like all those times, her heart raced a bit faster and her stomach began to flip as they began to move around the room. Though she adjusted much faster now. A spin and lean, the two were very well versed in how each dance went._

_"Its been a while since I've danced." He said as the gracefully glided around the room, waiting for something a bit more upbeat to come on._

_"I couldn't tell, honestly. We just had our end of year ball at Beauxbatons, so nothing new really." She told him, being spun once more. The best bit of ballroom dancing was the spinning and the lifting, though that was usually avoided later in the night to avoid accidents._

_"Did I tell you how radiant you look this evening, m'lady." Sirius said, faking a posh English accent like the Queen's. Laughing lightly to cover up her light blush, she rolled her eyes sarcastically at him._

_"Always the charmer, Black." The blonde replied as she dipped, their faces inches away as they did so. They both smiled wider then the Cheshire cat as they looked into each others eyes: the storm greeting the forest. Only to be sucked back into time by the flow of people around them._

_"What can I say? I know how to impress the ladies." He told her, wagging his brows causing her to start laughing at his stupid antics. The two continued to spin, turn, leap and dip for at least another hour. Talking about anything and everything._

"El? Are you alright?" Remus asked, dragging the girl out of her thoughts. Looking up at his concerned face, she smiled warmly.

"Yes. I was just think. Okay, first of all, take my hand- like this." Directing his hand into hers, in a cupping-like position. "Now, put your free hand on my waist." She told him, grabbing onto his shoulder. Though he was a bit taller then what she was used too. 

"But-" He tried to worm his way out of this but the girl was not going to let him. Grabbing his free hand and placing it on her waist, the boy lightly gulped. 

"This is the most common pose for ballroom dancing when your not in a professional performance. Now, time to step it up a bit. With your right leg, step forward and then bring them together." As he stepped forward, the girl stepped back and they brought their legs together again. "Do the same again. Try to relax, it is easy to mess up when you over think. Also, don't look at the floor, look at me." She said, releasing one hand to turn his face towards her and then resumed the previous position. Remaining eye contact, he stepped forward with his left leg and drew together again. "Good! See nothing scary about dancing. Lets go again!" By the time Remus had got a hang of it, the two were disturbed by the clicking of a camera before a certain redhead popped in through the hatch.

"Dance lessons! One for the memory book." She said, plonking down on Sirius' bed. The boy looked utterly confused. "Oh. Right. Basically, the girls and I decided to start taking pictures of special occasions for memory books. Prove to our children that we were actually fun." Lily joked, looking at the still photo that would come alive once she'd poured potion over the top.

"You mean, your children. I refuse to have them." Eleanor stated, leaning on one of the wooden posts.

"Don't be stupid, Ellie." Lily rolled her eyes at the girl. This was the response she got from most people when she said that. Or 'You'll change your mind later in life' or the classic 'but your a woman.' Not even Lily understood that she simply didn't want children and never did want them. Whilst most girls planned their wedding and baby names, she didn't really think of the future at all. Probably because she couldn't see her future, some days she couldn't even picture tomorrow.

"If a man said that, you wouldn't question it." Eleanor shot back, raising a brow at the girl. The whole time Remus remained silent, feeling like it wasn't his place. He himself wanted children but could definitely see the blonde's side. One of his own best friends had shared a similar statement with him. Silence washed over them, the only noise was the scratchy record playing in the background. "What did you want, anyways." 

"I came to find you, a parcel came by for you with owls." She explained. "I thought you'd be here because the hatch was propped open."

"Oh, alright. I'll come with you when I'm done." The blonde replied, turning to Remus and then back at her. "Unless you want to help. Your equally bad at dancing as Delilah." El teased, making Lily's jaw drop as she let out a 'hey!' followed by a shove. Eleanor fell back onto James' bed with a laugh. "Your only mad because you know its true. Okay! From the top." She directed clapping her hands together before standing on the bed frame to get a better view.

Remus and Lily waltzed around the room, laughing every so often because someone stood on the others foot. The blonde made sure to get a picture of the moment together, their friendship was so pure. 

"What is going on here?" James asked as he stepped into the room, his eyes flickering from the dancing two to Eleanor stood on his bed frame. Quidditch practise was apparently over, both Sirius and James' kits where caked in mud. Peter followed behind, with a book in hand as he had watched from the stands. 

"An orgy." She blinked as his eyes flashed to hers in horror. "What do you think, Potter? Use that non-existing brain of yours." The girl added, jumping onto the floor as she watched Sirius smirk. That got him a nudge in the gut from James.

"How was practise?" The redhead spoke up as stopping the stare of between Potter and her bestfriend, El smirking when he looked away first. Sirius went straight to the bathroom, looking a bit suspicious. 

"Great. Plus, Padfoot got himself a date. Isn't that right, mate!" James called after him. _That's why he's acting like that,_ the girl thought taking a solid guess at who it was. 

"Yeah." There was an unenthusiastic call from the bathroom as Remus moved to the blonde's side, eyeing her for any hints of emotion. Peter flopped onto his bed, lifting the needle to stop the music that no one was listening too.

"Who's he going with?" Remus asked the question on everyone's mind. The bespectacled boy grinned, trying to hold back a laugh.

"Violet, of all people. She came to ask him after watching us at practise." James mused, never going to let the boy forget that moment.

"Least, I have a date!" Sirius called as the shower began to run. The boys face began to redden, turning away from the group momentarily. 

"Anyone else got a date? Evans? Westbrook?" James quizzed, looking between them .

"No." Yes." They said at the same time, Remus eyes went large and flickered between the four in the room.

"Oh. Good for you, Lily." He said with a smile before directing his attention to the blonde. "What do you mean? I thought you were going with Reese Thompson, from our quidditch team. Well, that's what he said."

"I haven't said yes, yet." She explained, with a small sigh that Remus seemed to have caught. "Anyways, better be going. I have things to do. You coming Lils?" Eleanor asked, climbing onto the bed post and hoisting her self out. The ginger quickly followed, getting a hand from Eleanor after muttering a 'bye'.

"You said she was going with someone!" Remus called once their footsteps trailed away, collapsing onto his bed knowing that Sirius would not be happy.

"I was right there when he asked! I just assumed that she said yes, first come first serve." The quidditch player tried to defend himself, pacing back and forth. "Maybe, we just don't tell him. She'll definitely go with Reese now though."

"I doubt it. If she was waiting on someone else, Sirius being taken won't change who she goes with." Peter explained, earning a hum of agreement from Remus. "The bigger problem is getting you a date, since Lily has been taken..." He reminded as James sat on the floor between the two. "So, what's the plan?"

♱

Since Adelaide showed the girl the old classroom, the girl had been non-stop training. It was hard as her muscles hadn't been used much except for walking and running. She spent most of her time doing stretched to get her optimum flexibility back and today she actually attempted her new routine that Annabeth had given her. The routine include a fouette saute, one of the hardest moves for most ballerinas though it looked so simple, a bournoville jete and many other moves to both test her skill and patients. She spent four hours up there, completely skipping dinner just to perfect her grand jete. Although she had been procrastinating and doing pirouette turns instead, her favourite move to do even en pointe. Every other day of the week was about building that resilience once more, today was actually practising those skills that she had borderline forgotten over the months. It was actually pleasant to dance, very freeing to not have someone breathing over her shoulder like at home or at Beauxbatons. She very much new what perfection was and wouldn't except anything else in ballet. 

Arriving back at the common room in her black leggings and sports bra, she hadn't brought her leotard so she made do, since she had taken off her ballet shoes, she was currently bare foot. Baby hairs were falling out of her bun and she was sweating like crazy, just needing a shower.

"Ella." That wasn't going to happen, as Sirius called her name as he exited the staircase. "There you are. Lily was wondering where you were." He said, crossing his arms as he took in her appearance.

"Sorry. I was practising." She sighed, shaking the shoes in her hand and he nodded.

"Is that to do with what your sister said?" The boy asked, catching her off guard.

"You know French?" El said out loud which he again nodded too. "Noted. Well, I'm going to shower. I'll talk to you later." She added, smiling at him. One he returned. Then she disappeared up the stairs, she was ready for sleep. Sirius stood there for a moment longer before heading out the common room to meet the other boys like he had intended to do, preparing for their next prank.

♱

Fresh out the shower, Eleanor bit into a sandwich that Lily had brought for her as she cast a spell to dry her hair and braided it. Taking a seat on her bed in her silk and lace slip dress, the girl noticed the parcel that had come for her perched on her pillow. It was a small to medium sized box on top was a note. Mary prepared for bed as Alice waited for her night parole with Frank, waiting for Lily and Remus to get back from their shift. The girl reached out and took the parcel in her hands, reaching for the letter. Opening the envelope carefully, she pulled out the beautifully written cursive note and it read:

_To my beautiful daughter,_

_My present to you. In this gift below is the last of your mother._

_I know she would want you to have it._

_Enjoy the ball, your dress is currently being made._

_\- Conan_

_(P.S. I have handled the situation with Jinky. She was simply confused, dear.)_

Once she had read the last line, it disappeared. Something she was very much used to in this family. It avoided information being spread, if not the letter would include a note for the girls to burn it once they had read through the note. For 'privacy' reasons, of course. A smile had appeared on her face. She twisted the locket that she had received from her father as she took it off and neatly place it on her bedside for the morning. Impatiently, tearing of the brown paper and string, underneath was a royal blue velvet box. Popping open the lid, she stared star struck at the piece. It was one that their mother wore to every ball or to just do the food shop. 

An important Victorian diamond garland necklace, designed at the front as an articulated open work frame that suspended a graduated series of five pear-shaped rose-cut diamonds, each within independent drop-shape old mine-cut garland frames. Accented by diamond swags. Joined to a similarly-set scrolling ribbon motif chain, mounted in silver.

This was one of the most beautiful pieces she had ever seen and was so grateful to have received this. A tear fell down her cheek as her fingers ran across the design, taking in this necklace that was such a reminder of her old life. Since their return, her father may have actually came to his senses. That house reminded him of Florence, every single day. Haunting him. What he had done, what he said he had to do. Every part of him knew that wasn't true. Eleanor was the only part of her left and he had tried to do everything to stop that. It was no use. Her heart was as gold as hers with a mind as poisoned as his...


	12. winter wonderland

**_chapter twelve_ **

「 _winter wonderland_ 」

♱

To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_A WHOLE WEEK_** beforethe ball was supposed to be, she had received a custom gown like no other she had had before. There was two problems: she had no one to go with and the dress didn't fit. It didn't take more then a minute after trying the dress on to realise they'd done that on purpose. It was smaller then her measurement when she left for Hogwarts. Meaning that she had a week to lose a few inches off her waist. She had done it once, it was nothing knew but she also knew that once she started then she might not be able to stop. Like last time.

With that, the girl spent anytime she could in that old classroom, training. If not, she was out running or sleeping. The more active she got, the less of a punishment it became. Everyday she would slip on the dress, the zip getting further up each day. It was not healthy to lose weight this way because of the pace that it happened, it was a temporary fix.

By Thursday night, the dress fit perfectly and she hadn't been prouder in a long time. That was one problem out of the way, at least. Now to find a date. Only El, Marlene and Delilah didn't have a date because Remus still hadn't plucked up the courage to ask. That was on her to-do list of the day. But first of all, she had her priorities like laying on the common room sofa thinking of who to go with. The redhead had stumbled in with Marlene, both laughing at something that one of them had said. Both of them recognised the moping figure and joined her.

"Where the hell have you been?" Lily asked, standing over her menacingly. "I haven't seen you outside of lessons and here you are, looking like you waist has been strangled." She added, taking in her large bruises on her hips but there was bruises everywhere. Eleanor was going to go for another run to finish off but she couldn't be bothered. Everything ached. That's why her midriff was on show, she was in leggings and a sports bra. At that comment, she pulled up the waistband and winced lightly at the contact to the skin. "Answer me." Lily declared in her motherly tone, causing the Westbrook to groan.

"I have been practising. I go home on Saturday, remember." Eleanor mumbled, remembering to visit the hospital wing. The moon was yesterday and she had made Delilah deliver the flowers herself.

"Oh El, you can't keep doing this to yourself." The redhead replied, with a sigh and her words only confused Marlene. Eleanor just glared at Lily, not wanting the lecture right now. "You shouldn't care what they think, your perfect."

"Yeah, that is easy for you to say. I don't survive if I'm not beyond 'perfect'." She said, pushing her self up from the sofa and grabbed the hoodie that laid on the sofa, his hoodie. A weak scent of ginger, cedar and amber still tickled her nose every time she pulled it on. Not only that, she would relax. Comfort.

"Wait. Eleanor." Marlene called, catching up to her before she exited the portrait hole. The taller girl spun on her heel to look at her. "Go to the ball with me?" There was a brief pause and the nerves where going to swallow her whole.

"Yeah, sure." Eleanor said, smiling at her before leaving. The girl didn't know whether to scream or not, excitement about to burst out of her frame. She was going with El. The Eleanor Westbrook. It was hard to retain from grinning like a maniac.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Along with her coming to check on the boy, she had decided that she needed to ask Madame Pomfrey about some treatment for her bruises. They were all over her legs and wasn't exactly the look she was going for at the ball. She reminded herself to head to the kitchen's after to pick up something small. Unfortunately with all the activity, she was horribly tired. Well, that's what she blamed the exhaustion on.

When she arrived, it was eerily quiet. The boys hadn't been spotted all day. Pushing the large doors open, she looked around at the darkened hall. One section was lit up by candle, illuminating two figures behind the curtains. At the sound of a giggle, she knew Delilah was there with the boy. Finally. She shut the door as quietly as possible and headed round to the nurses office, knocking lightly before entering.

"How can I help, dear?" Pomfrey asked, looking up from her paper work.

"I was wondering if you had anything to get rid of bruises, like big ones." Eleanor explained, her hands making shapes to try and help her. It was something the nerves made her do.

"Well, let's have a look at these bruises." She said and Eleanor just blinked at her. "I can't help you if I don't know what i'm working with." Pomfrey told her. Reluctantly, Eleanor lifted up the hoodie, not even bothering to look her in the eye. Shame or embarrassment: it was all the same to the blonde. "Good heavens! How on earth did you do this?" The lady quizzed, heading straight to the supply cupboard. When she said nothing, Pomfrey just returned with a vile of green liquid. "Put this in a glass of water and drink it before you sleep. You should be as good as knew in the morning." The blonde smiled and mumbled a 'thank you' to her.

Deciding she'd talk to Remus tomorrow, she exited to a completely dark wing. Delilah had gone in the space of twenty minutes and the boy had gone to sleep. She really hoped that it went well for them.

Upon exiting, the blonde collided with someone and her hip took most of the impact. She coward slightly, still staying on her feet though she was hunched over, a little whimper escaping her trembling lip. The person was by her side instantly, helping her stand once more. In that moment, she thought of becoming a turtle and retreat into the hoodie. It was clearly a caring person as they had come to their aid so soon, they definitely want to know what was wrong. In a moment of bravery, she turned to see who it was. Sirius. This was not the time. Her smile faltered. She had been escaping his presence since she found out about his ball date. To her, it was totally not correlated that she would get angry seeing his face after that piece of information. 

"Are you alright?" He questioned, on of his hands on her arm and the other on the small of her back. "Lily told me-"

"I am fine." Eleanor cut him off, stepping out of his grasp and immediately flinched at the shooting pain that shot down the left half of her body.

"Clearly not. You can't even walk." Sirius replied to her, crossing his arms over his chest. "Your hurting yourself, again. Aren't you?"

"No. I just needed to fit into my dress for the ball, nothing bad." She explained, closing her eyes as she talked. Her back to his face.

"Then show me." He said, knowing the extreme she had been to before because of Annabeth.

"What, no." El shot back and he just hummed, making her sigh. Slowly turning towards him, lifting up the jumper for him to see the injuries she had sustained. "They're just bruises, I'm fine." She huffed, pushing the hoodie back down.

"That's not fine. You flinched when taking a step." Sirius argued, raising a brow at her.

"And that was on you, it didn't hurt till now. Plus, Pomfrey gave me this." She told him, raising up the vile to him. "I'll be back to normal. There was just a lot of working out I had to do."

"You only get bruises that bad from a corset far too tight." Damn him and his pureblood knowledge. If it was anyone else, she would have easily got away with that.

"I was desperate, okay!" She yelled at him, everything wanting to bubble over in that instance. In that moment, he didn't look at her with pity or disappointment, he just smiled weakly. With that, he stepped forward and nodded his head down the corridor and he helped her back to the common room without another word being shared. The two only stopped at the bottom of the girls stairs. "Thank you, Sirius." She whispered softly.

"Goodnight." He replied and was unexpectedly pulled into a hug by her. Before they split ways, the boy kissed the top of her forehead before heading towards his own dorm. As she climbed the stairs, the butterflies crashed around her stomach as her grin stretched wider then it ever had previously. Then she remember Violet...  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  


Today was the day of the ball. The whole school was alight with excitement, even those who wouldn't be attending. First and foremost, they had classes to attend to. Potions had passed faster then expected but Defence Against the Dark Arts seemed to drag on for hours. Since the incident with Jinky, she noticed how on edge the boys were. They had all moved from the back corner to sit around her and Lily too. She hadn't spoken to Sirius about last night. The girl was awfully conflicted on the situation, one moment it felt like he looked at her the same way she looked at him but then he was kissing Violet and talking her to the dance. Not knowing what to think, she felt nothing but numbness on the topic.

"This ancient and mysterious charm conjures a magical guardian, a projection of all your most positive feelings. The Patronus Charm is difficult, and many witches and wizards are unable to produce a full, corporeal Patronus, a guardian which generally takes the shape of the animal with whom they share the deepest affinity. You may suspect, but you will never truly know what form your Patronus will take until you succeed in conjuring it." Jinky read from the textbook, as the students made some notes. "When we come back, we will be attempting to cast such a charm. Don't be disheartened if you cannot, it takes a lot of skill to be able to conjure this spell. Over the Winter, recite the incantation 'Expecto Patronum' and think of your happiest memory. We will cover wand work when you get back. Dismissed." She announced and everyone was fast to their feet, they couldn't wait to go get ready. Grabbing Lily by the arm, the blonde swerved in and out of the groups of people to get back to the Gryffindor common room. For once, Eleanor had agreed to get ready the muggle way and it was about to be chaos as the other girls where going to join them.  
  
  
  
  
  


"Okay, if we close the curtains, people can change there if they're not comfortable in front of others. Makeup in the bathroom and we can do hair on my bed." Lily advised the bunch of girls once everyone had arrived. They had two hours. "I'm going to do hair. El and Delilah can help me. Dorcas and Mary can go do their makeup whilst we do Marlene's, Edith's and Alice's hair." The girl explained and everyone began to scurry around to where Lily advised. Being a fifth year, Isadora wasn't attending and was spending time with Thomas, the other fifth year in their group.

With that, Eleanor got out the curler and began styling Alice's hair as she wanted. For a dress, she had chosen a short floral black sequin wrap dress with flared sleeves and a flared skirt. It suited her figure well. Eleanor created waves in a nineteen twenties style to match the outfit. Lily wore a plain emerald green satin gown that had a slit up the side, her hair was pinned into space buns. Delilah opted for an off the shoulder ballroom gown in a light blue that was embroidered with a variety of flowers, she had braided multiple little braids into her hair. Mary wore a skin tight red velvet dress and looked absolutely stunning, her hair in cornrows. Dorcas and Edith where matching in a royal navy colour but Dorcas wore a short puffy sleeved dress and Edith wore a proper corseted ball gown. They each styled their hair differently though, Dorcas straightened her hair as it was usually wavy and Edith wore hair indigo hair in bunches. Finally, Marlene wore a floaty champagne gown that was off her shoulders, her hair in a sleek ponytail.

May photos of the girls had been taken throughout the hours, most of them looking disastrous. As she finished her neutral makeup, the others where ready to go. She told them that she would meet them down there. At each side, she pinned back her curls with a few bobby pins and let some front strands loose to frame her face. Eleanor pulled off her hoodie and shorts, staring at her figure. Tracing a hand over the scar that went from her mid thigh to below her lower abdomen.

"You should be glad that wasn't on your face. You wouldn't get very far in life." She whispered to herself, closing her eyes to keep in the tears. The girl could see the beauty in scars and what some saw as 'imperfections' on others but not on herself. Whoever she saw in the mirror, the one everyone adored, was never the person she wanted to be.

Slipping on her own dress, it was a sheer violet material on the skirt with a solid under dress with delicate crystals embroidered on both the bodice and skirt. Both form fitting and floaty, it was what accentuated her figure the most. Doing a twirl, she smiled at herself. The bruises had disappeared overnight and she no longer ached. Clipping the necklace around her neck, she pulled her hair over her shoulders and put a fake smile before she remembered that she didn't need to. This ball, she was surrounded by those she loved. Gulping, she scratched her neck lightly before pulling on her heels and heading out the door.

Apparently she was later then expected as no one was outside the doors, except two house elves that stood like guards. She headed down the stairs with the fabric bunched in her hands. Sucking in a deep breath, she flattened out her dress and held her head high as the elves opened the door for her.

Inside was like a winter wonderland. Ice sculptures, 'snow' covered trees and grounds where photo booths had been set up, the orchestra's stage covered in icicles, a whole silver and white colour scheme: it was far more elegant than she expected. Honestly, it reminded her of the ball she would have to attend in less then a week.

As she moved down the centre of the hall, she noticed all the eyes where on her. Looking around slowly, she spotted Dumbledore who smiled brightly at her. She believed they would have been dancing and not eating right now, that would have been a much easier circumstance. If it was anyone else, they would have freaked out at the eyes and the whispers but El was used to the attention. For better or for worse. A wave of a hand caught her attention at one of the large round tables: James. Without another second to waist, she hurried over to them with a smile, taking her place by Marlene.

"Hi." She whispered to him with a smile.  
"Hello." Eleanor replied in the same hushed tone, smiling back at her. At her table sat Sirius and Violet, James and Georgia, Remus and Delilah, Peter and Caprice - he looked the upmost disgusted, as well as Mary and her date. On the table across from them was Lily and Jack, Edith and Aaron, Frank and Alice, as well as Dorcas and Rabastan. The girl did a double take, not believing who those girls had gone with. She had missed a lot in the past week. It made sense to her now. The two quiet Slytherin's going together, she had caught the two studying. A Lestrange with a halfblood, he would be in shit for this. To him, it must be worth it. She just worried about his friends across the room...

Eyes pierced her skin as everyone finished their meals, she knew exactly it was. Sensing the insecurity from a mile away, her eyes flickered up to meet Violet staring at her and Marlene.

"So. Eleanor." Here we go. Placing down her knife and fork before wiping her mouth, Remus' eyes flickered to the Westbrook cautiously. "Are you and Marlene here together?" Violet asked with fake smile.

"Yes. Is there a problem with that." She answered in the politest voice possible. One that Sirius had heard from her many times when she had spoken to his mother. His lips twitched slightly as he sipped on his drink.

"Well, n-" She tried to speak, only to be cut off by her own lackey.

"Yes." Caprice snarled from across her table, causing a gasp from Delilah and many shocked faces. "It's not natural."

"Nothing about you is either. I guess we're even." She smiled sarcastically, throwing the napkin onto the dinner plate as she stood up. People heading to the dance floor. "Care to dance?" Eleanor asked, holding her hand out for Marlene who graciously took it.

"It'd be my pleasure." The girl answered, laughing lightly as they walked off, arm in arm. Both of them knew that the night would be ruined if they stayed there with Caprice. They'd deal with her another day.

Once they where on the dance floor, Eleanor immediately grabbed her shoulder and Marlene her waist, like to pieces of a puzzle snapping together. Usually, the positions would be the other way round because El was the taller of the two but this just worked. An as they began to dance, Marlene took the lead.

"Sorry about her." Eleanor said as the glided through the traffic of others dancing.

"You shouldn't be. What she said was to both of us. She had no right." The blonde replied, observing the sorrowful look on El's face.

"I know. You've just been called out like this before, like that time when we were holding hands in Paris and we got something thrown on us for it. When that happened, you knew you weren't straight. Maybe not a specific label but you knew. Out of all people, I didn't expect that from a pureblood. I suppose they like to get married to carry on the bloodline though." She explained before looking down at her, Marls smiled at her.

"Your still valid, no matter how long that you have or haven't known. It's just our little secret that everyone seems to know now." Marlene replied, getting a hesitant laugh from El.

"Oh, it's going to be a fun week at the Westbrook residency." If anyone spoke of her 'new' exploration of sexuality, the press would have a field day. As thoughts consumed her mind, she was dipped by Marlene, causing the two to laugh. "When did you get so good at dancing?"

"I got a lesson or two." She told her, thinking about the many hours she spent with Sirius yelling at her to start again.

♱

Adelaide had bunched into the corner tables with Avery and his friends when a late guest arrived. Chatter had died out, most of it to do with the other Westbrook not attending the event, when all eyes fell on the blonde. One thing Ada always admired about her sister was how easily she captured the room, with or without a grand entrance. Then the whispers started up again, some out of adoration and some out of spite. If they wanted to admit it or not, Eleanor was the belle of the ball. The two sisters were near identical but no one looked at Ada in the same way, not even slightly. Seemingly, the blonde had this aura that people were instantly drawn to that she simply didn't have. At parties, in interviews, during actual movie shootings: everyone wanted to know about Eleanor. Out of the two, Ada had the most successful career and had millions of fans but that didn't mean Eleanor got any less love. The blonde had a very loyal following and she loved them all but, unlike Ada, she hated the fame and everything that came with it. She kept going because she loved walking down the runway or having the odd photo shoot but being criticised in the media from as young as eleven, Eleanor couldn't handle the lifestyle that she was forced into.

When everything settled down again, the topic of discussion had turned to Rabastan and his date. According to Mulciber and his vocalness, the Slytherin was fraternising with the 'enemy' and assumed he was doing some sort of 'charity work' by going with Dorcas. The whole time, Avery was silent and he wanted to defend his bestfriend but was way out of depth. He had been the whole reason that the boy had asked Dorcas in the first place as he hadn't been brave to ask who he wanted to go with either. 

Dinner was served and she stayed for no more then one dance with Avery, as promised and went in search of Clementine. Neither Emmeline or Caoimhe had seen her since dinner, so she went on a mission to find her. The place was swarming with people, knowing that wasn't Clem's thing, she headed out to the courtyard. There was a few people here and their, mainly couples, but at the end of the covered bridge stood a girl in a pale lemon dress that had three quarter length flared sleeves and a long skirt.

Hurrying over, Ada instantly heard the sobs and sniffles of her friend causing her heart to shatter, piece by piece. Scratching the skin where here new necklace sat, she started to think. It had only been an hour or so since the ball had begun and she had only been with Rowan since. He was more than likely the route of all this.

"Clem?" The brunette said as she approached. Practically jumping out of her skin, the crying girl wiped her tears before turning towards her best friend. 

"Ada, why are you not in there?" She asked, frowning but in all honesty she was glad to see the girl. "You should get back to your date."

"I only agreed to come to spend time with you. So, why are you crying? Out here and alone." Ada asked, leaning her back on the post as she stood by the girls side. 

"Oh." Was the only thing she could muster to that but the grin on her spoke thousands of whispers all at once. "Rowan said that he didn't want to come with me, he was to nervous to ask his crush. He basically didn't want to come alone." _Bastard_ , Ada thought. With a spare of the moment thought, she spoke up.

"You don't need him. You have me. Now lets go back in their and make him regret it." Adelaide suggested and Clem nodded, taking the girls hand as they headed back in. Ready to dance on display. When they got back in, they were greeted with groups of people surrounding the dance floor. And, of course, everyone had gathered to watch her sister dance with one of her best friends. That wouldn't stop Ada as she dragged Clem onto the dance floor and she gained the spotlight like her sister.

♱

"There you are. I've been looking all over for you." Eleanor said as she approached the redhead at the drinks stand, Lily pulling the girl in for a hug. "Is he this mystery boy you've been seeing since you kissed him on Halloween?" 

"Um, yeah." She admitted, get herself a drink that had already been spiked with alcohol. "He's very sweet and funny."

"But he's not James." Eleanor said with a cheeky smile, earning jab in the side from her best friend. "Alright. I'm sorry but the way he's been staring at you all night, you must let him have one dance."

"No, that's just mean. I'd rather be cruel to be kind. I wouldn't want to lead him on." Lily sighed, finishing her drink already. "Plus, we should round the girls and get a photo in the booth before everyone is plastered, whatever is in here is strong."

"You head to the dance floor and drag them away, I'll find the lurkers." She called, heading straight to the corridor for any criers, there's always one. Instead of the girls, El found someone else. "Peter?" She questioned, slipping through the door to walk closer to the boy on the stairs. His head snapped up and he smiled warmly at her as she sat by him on the steps. "Why you out here by yourself and not in there enjoying yourself?"

"The evening was spoiled pretty early by Caprice, so." His arms did a shrugging motion as he twisted the buttons on his jacket. "Sorry about that."

"Not your fault, Pete. Why are you with her anyways?" Eleanor questioned, finding it odd that he'd come with such a person. Though the girl had never heard him have an interest in anyone, she was certain that wasn't his type. She was certain that Caprice wasn't anyone's type.

"The person I would have loved to come with already asked... a girl." He whispered the last part but the blonde still caught it. To be honest, it took her a hot minute to understand.

"Oh... Oh! You like boys." El said quietly and Peter blushed, nodding his head. "I will take that secret to the grave then."

"Thanks, El. I'd do the same for you too." Peter returned genuinely, a smile spreading onto his face. "Your the first person that knows, now."

"Really? Marlene is the only one that knows for me. Well, I assume everyone knows now." She returned, the girl was overfilled with joy. Glad that everyone felt comfortable enough to tell her such delicate information, like Peter had known her for a few months and had trusted her over his own bestfriends. 

"Wait. You actually like girls, as in being a lesbian. I thought the two of you came as friends and Caprice was just assuming. Good for you." He said squeezing her shoulder, his mind flashing to his best friend and how he'd take the news if he ever found out.

"Not exactly." Eleanor told him, causing the boy to from. "I'm actually... Bi." It still felt weird to say. She was entrusting someone with information that could cost her family everything in the muggle world. They really weren't open to homosexuality, wizards were more progressive, sometimes. 

"Do you ever wish that it was different? That you fit in with everyone else." Peter spoke after a pause. His sexuality had been a struggle for him for a while, a weight seemed to be lifted off his chest. "I feel like this is just another thing that makes me an outsider."

"Of course I do. I believe those who fight through their struggle will get what they truly desire in the end. Everyone feels like an outsider sometimes, I can tell. Some people hide it better then others. Trust me when I say that you belong, Pete." Eleanor said and he smiled at her. "Now lets get back in there. I'm going to take a picture and then we're going to dance!" She told him as they both got off the steps, she twirled to the door and made the boy chuckle. Both of them entering. 

"God, Evans. Your arse is so boney." Marlene excalimed as nine of them piled into the six person prop set. The photographer looked very discouraged as the group sorted themselves out. Eleanor stood at the back with Mary and Delilah as they pretended to be fancy ladies, holding their flutes up that did not hold champagne in them (it was apparently fizzy apple juice laced with vodka).

"Will you quit your moaning." Lily rolled her eyes, moving around to dig the bones in a bit more causing a shoving fight to ensue. Getting them all laughing at the girls antics, that's when the camera flashed. Capturing the moment perfectly. Real authentic them. The group took a few more before heading back to the group of waiting boys.

"The testosterone levels are high, I can feel it in the air." Lily whispered to El, as they approached the very silent table. The other three girls had disappeared to take photos as well. 

"Yes, they will definitely be brawling for alpha male status in a minute." The blonde joked, making both girls snicker as they joined them. Relief seemed to wash over them all as they noticed them arriving. "Come on, Pete. On your feet." She declared and the boy smiled, following her onto the dance floor. Dumbledore had hired some sort of wizarding rock band to play for an hour. They only had twenty minutes left to play as everyone followed their lead, joining the two on the dance floor.

Not a single care in the world. They all danced and sang, swaying in motions with the large group of students. Bodies colliding. Heart racing. Feet aching. Voice breaking. Arms swaying. Hair flailing. Everything was back to normal. Nobody cared who kissed who or who came with who. In that moment they were just teenagers enjoying themselves. Their internal clocks were ticking. Who would be the first to go? Right now, they didn't care. That was tomorrow's problem. For now they were just drifting through time, without the hardship that would be thrown that way. Only the headmaster was in the know, most of the students he looked upon now wouldn't make it to twenty. Not in this world. Pawns in the game of life. He saw it as the cost for the greater good. All he was doing was raising them for slaughter.

♱

"You and Marlene coming together. Are we going to talk about that?" Lily finally plucked up the courage to ask her the question that had been rattling around in her skull for hours. Numbers had began to dwindle with Marlene, Alice, Dorcas, Edith and their dates had turned in for the night. The only reason Marlene had left was because she wasn't feeling well, El had insisted on staying with her but she was sent right back to the hall once El had walked the girl to the Hufflepuff common room. 

"What about it?" Eleanor responded talking a sip of her drink as she watched others dance around the room.

"Are you two a thing? Like, I have nothing against that if you do but are you two just friends or not." The redhead questioned, placing down her glass. She had definitely had too much to drink but that was perfect, she could ask questions to her hearts content without feeling worried of embarrassment.

"I don't know, Lils. Either way, I'm fine with that." Eleanor answered as James approached them, his date was leaving with Violet and Caprice, she couldn't be more thankful. The girl beside her seemed on edge, so the blonde came to her aid. "Potter, come dance with me." She said, standing by his side. A wash of sadness crossed his face before following after the blonde. Lily muttered a 'thank you' to El as Sirius came to sit by her, watching the pair. "Sorry. I know you wanted to dance with Lily." She said and he just laughed.

"I didn't expect her to want to dance with me anyways." James answered, the song was a bit more upbeat, so it was more of a jive then a ballroom dance. 

"You didn't hear this from me but she doesn't want to hurt you. She came here with Jack because he asked her first. Don't give up now. Just be a bit subtle with your advances." El explained as she was spun by the boy.

"You think so?" James asked, still unsure about his dynamic with the redhead.

"I'm never wrong, Jamsie." She said confidently before spinning him, making the pair laugh as they continued to dance. Their two best friends watching closely from afar, glad the two got on. They sat in silence but as they looked at each other, there was a mutual understanding. With these silent whispers, the two would be friends from here on out. 

♱

It was approaching two o'clock in the morning and most people had left, only couples were left to slow dance together. Remus and Delilah being one of those couples. His arms were around her waist and hers were around his neck as they swayed together, looking into each others eyes as they talked and laughed. The mixture she had made for him was definitely working. Eleanor had been watching but not really, her eyes trained on the dance floor but her mind was somewhere else, the hours slowly slipping away but it felt like seconds to her. For the first time in over five years, she was going home. Back to the place where she would now have to live without her mother and be reminded of that fact daily. 

"Ella?" His voice pulled her out of her thoughts, she turned to him and smiled even though she still looked completely out of it. "What are you still doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing." She replied crossing her arms as she raised a brow at him.

"Oh yeah? Well I asked first." He shot back with a smug smile on his face, a very contagious one as well as she began to smile too.

"I was just thinking. I go back home tomorrow..." Eleanor said, putting her face in her hands as she pulled at the skin out of stress. Now the boy in front of her was not the best at handling emotions, his whole life he was taught to hide them. But what he was good at was distractions. So, he held out his hand out for her to take and she just blinked at him, not registering what was happening.

"Dance. It'll get your mind off things." He said, with a sigh she took him up on the offer and they headed to the dance floor. Just like the others, he wrapped his arms around her waist and hers around his shoulders. "I'm guessing the potion worked."

"Yep. All back to normal." Eleanor said in exacerbation. Here she was, again. Standing with this boy that one night was kissing her forehead and the next was taking another blonde to the ball. It rocked her brain how easily he bounced between. She wan't exactly sure how she felt towards this boy but in the last twenty four hours she figured it was more then friendship.

"You can't do that to yourself, Ella. Your harming yourself." Sirius spoke after a moment, she did not expect him to say anything of the sort. 

"No I'm not." She returned and the boy just sighed. Harm comes in many ways. A way to not feeling anything or to feel something. Cutting, drinking, doing drug. Common signs of harming oneself. Overworking yourself, starving yourself, not taking care of your hygiene, not leaving your bed for days, not drinking enough water, purposefully excluding yourself. They are all common day to day things that are harm. One simply wastes away into nothingness. Sirius didn't saying anything though, he just smiled at her knowingly.

To be honest, the two didn't know how much time had past. The band had gone and the music was coming from a large record player. Simply swaying. Her head was rested on his shoulder as they moved to the sombre beat of the song. Just holding her tightly in his arms. By tomorrow it would be like none of this had happened. There was only two other couples left, neither of whom they knew. It was peaceful. Her eyes where closed as she was soothed by the low beating of the boys heart, their heart beats starting to fall in sync. In this moment, the world was theirs. Him and her. Together. No one else. For once, Eleanor didn't hate being so big in this world for she felt small around him. Though the outside world kept trying to crawl back, they both felt protected in this embrace. Her and him. Together...


	13. the abandonment of miss mckinnon

**_chapter thirteen_ **

「 _the abandonment of miss mckinnon_ 」

♱

_The sun does not abandon the moon to darkness._

♱  
  
  


**_TW:_** homophobic slurs (I will repeat this TW as it is at the end so you can skip over if it is uncomfortable for you or harmful in anyway.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _LIKE EVERY MORNING_** in the Gryffindor girl's dorm, it was a chaotic mess. Well, Lily was perfectly organised. The redhead sat on her bed, reading her book, with a 'told you so' expression on her face as the other three rushed around to get packed. Eleanor had buried a few of her new pieces under some of her usual clothes, not wanting Annabeth to discover them but wanting them to go out in, and kept the rest their. It was currently the 23rd December which meant she didn't have to put up with her family for long, just enough to do a publicity stunt and make everyone believe they are the perfect little family.

Back into her brown plaid skirt, thin black turtle neck, thigh high socks and her platform oxfords, she decided this was her safest option. The paparazzi hadn't seen her in the outfit and it was Annabeth approved. Better then stressing out over pieces of material. With a flick of her wand, her makeup and hair was perfect before she flicked her wand again and her bag was fully packed.

"You need to teach me how you do that." Lily said, shaking her head with a smile. The two linked arms as they departed out of the common room, Alice and Mary following behind.

"I can't believe its Christmas. This time next year I'll be training to be an auror!" Alice spoke from behind him. "We need to make as many memories as possible before I go."

"Alice, your so dramatic. You sound like we won't be joining you the year after." Lily retorted with a smile as they got into a carriage with Frank and his friends. The redheads face a bright red.

"A year is a long time." She replied, making the other three laugh.

"And what are you lot on about?" Frank asked, throwing his arm around Alice.

"Alice is acting like its the last year she'll see us." Eleanor told him, smiling at the unofficial couple. "We could do something this summer though, before you start training."

"What do you mean?" Alice asked, intrigued by the suggestion. The carriage jolted and set off to the station.

"I have a summer house, on the coast of France. We can all go there. You lot can come too. There's a flat at the end of the garden if you didn't want to be around us, I'm sure the french ladies would love you Aaron." The blonde said causing the boy to her left to smirk.

"Sounds good. We wouldn't be any bother, though. Would we?" Frank quizzed, wanting to know if they were actually wanted or if she asked because they were there.

"Eleanor wouldn't ask if she didn't want you there." Lily explained to the boy, making both Mary and Alice grin. Eleanor was quite blunt sometimes, if you weren't wanted or liked you would know. Possibly because it didn't happen often, the blonde tried with everyone except a select few.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  


To say there was a lack of room was an understatement. Usually containing Delilah, Lily, Marlene, Mary, Alice and Thomas, they had gained six new people. Edith, Dorcas, Jack, Aaron, Frank and Eleanor. Which made the space very cramped but they made it work. Currently laying across Lily, Dorcas, Marlene and her feet just reached Mary in her laid down position; she had been reduced to the lap seat even though she was one of tallest. Although everyone loved Alice, they were really hoping that they'd get a separate compartment now, one next door. For now, El's head rested in Lily's lap as she played with blondes hair. They were currently arguing over their game of exploding snaps when Eleanor decided to get up and stand at the compartment door that had been propped open.

"El, get a picture of this chaos." Lily said over the voices, passing the girl her camera. She set up the timer and ran into the apartment. She hopped onto Lily's lap as everyone tried to pose but ended up bursting into a fit of laughter.

"That really hurt my back." Eleanor groaned, rubbing her left side that had hit the redhead's knee. She picked up the camera and held on to it, practically forgetting that she had it on her. "Anyone coming for a walk, I need to stretch my legs." Delilah hopped up and followed her out but the others stayed seated.

"Can we-"

"Go see your lover boy? Absolutely." Eleanor interrupted her and this was the first time she had seen the girl visibly blush. The girl began to stumble over excuses. "I'm just joking but we can still stop by their compartment.  
  
  
  
  
  


When the two got to the back section of the train, it was oddly quiet to say the marauders where sitting in here. Normally, you'd hear James' very vocal voice or Peter's loud laugh or Sirius completely dire dramatic dialog. Something was up. They approached the compartment to see one boy reading his book and three other figures slumped over. Slumped over, snoring, mouth agape, heads resting on each other: Sirius and James looked like a lovely little couple. Peter had curled up next to the window and covered himself with his jacket. Remembering she had the camera, Eleanor couldn't help but take a picture of the disastrous duo. Delilah laughed before they startled Remus with a flash. He frowned until he saw who it was. Closing his book, he carefully stood up and slid the door open.

"One for the memory book." Eleanor claimed, barely able to keep the smile off her face. "How come they're sleeping." Now Remus was the one smiling like a buffoon.

"They stayed up until seven talking about the dance. Unfortunately, with the full moon and all, they're very sleepy." He explained, leaning on the door frame.

"How come your not sleeping too?" Delilah asked, a flash of concern on her face. "We can come back later so we don't disturb them." She added with a smile.

"No, its fine. They've been asleep for the past four hours. They hardly made it ten minutes." Remus explained to the two as he headed back inside, waving them in. The curly haired girl took her seat by Remus whilst Eleanor sat by the door, putting her feet up on the chair next to the two sleeping boys. With a smirk, she decided to do the only thing logical and she slammed the door shut. Immediately, both James and Sirius shot up and disgruntled from their wake up call. The other three couldn't help but laugh.

"Good morning to you too." Eleanor said through her laughs as they tried to figure out who was talking until they spotted her, both out of it. Their hair stuck up in random spots and their eyes were heavy like they had just been pulled out the best sleep of their entire lives.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"That's were your wrong, Jamsie. Your ego is just compensating for something." Eleanor ended their twenty minute bicker but he looked utterly confused. Peter was laughing so hard that he almost fell of the seat. Remus and Delilah leaned into each other as they both wheezed and Sirius just stared straight ahead with a wide smirk on his face. It was in good time that they finished their argument as the train pulled into the station. "I've got to go meet Lily. Are you coming Lilah?"

"I'll catch up in a minute." She said and with a nod the blonde departed to meet up with the others. El and Ada were being picked up with Evans' as they so kindly offered as they themselves wanted to see their -basically- third daughter. Handing back the camera, she smiled mischievously at the redhead before they were ushered off the train and to baggage collection were they'd meet Adelaide.

Hoisting the elegant blue and gold trunk out of the pile, the three congregated and then started to weave through the crowds. She had never been in such a cramped area in her life, everyone was knocking and pushing. The girls had to hold hands so they didn't lose each other. They ran through the barrier and the two Westbrook's placed on their sunglasses so they wouldn't be instantly be swarmed.

"No way! Little Ellie, look at how much you've grown." A feminine voice gushed as she was taken into a massive bear hug by -who she assumed was- Mrs Evans.

"Hello, Mrs Evans. It's good to see you again!" The girl returned the hug with a small smile while Mr Evans greeted Adelaide, the two getting familiar with one another again.

"I've told you to call me Rose. None of that formality. Your practically family, for heavens sake!" The greying redhead expressed with a smile. "Now hurry up. Dinner should be ready when we get home. Oh, Lily, your sisters new boyfriend has come to visit. So, best behaviour everyone."

"Hello, kiddo." Victor Evans greeted the young blonde, pulling her into a side hug. "How was your time in France."

"It was great. I miss it but I'm glad to be here with Lily and the girls." She replied. "How's work?" Eleanor asked politely as Lily borderline argued with her mother.

"I just got a promotion actually. All is good." He said with a smile. Victor, although he had a traditional name, was a very youthful acting man. Truth be told, he hadn't had the best childhood and was still making up for it to this day. Cracking jokes, laughing, smiling: fitting in as many memories as possible as he neared sixty, he was only fifty three at the moment like. He was everything that Eleanor wanted her own father to be. To this day, she can remember there was a father/daughter day at their primary school and Victor came in for both of the girls after Conan had flat out refused. He felt sorry for both the Westbrook children really, Eleanor more so. Therefore, he always tried to stand in for her. That came impossible when she moved though.   
  
  


"Don't forget to write to me!" Eleanor called out as James and Sirius exited the station behind them. Both of them turned and smiled at the girl.

"We won't." James called back and Eleanor got in the car.

"James, dear. Who is that?" Euphemia asked intently, staring at the spot where the blonde just stood.

"Eleanor Westbrook. You know the muggle model with the crazy perfect family." He replied to the woman who looked rather disheartened.

"She looks familiar." The older woman said, blanking out her sons words. Like someone she used to know.

"Probably because our James has a pos-" Sirius was instantly cut off by a swift punch to the arm but that didn't stop the smirk on his face. As soon as they got home, James planned on taking that down. Little did he know that Sirius had stuck it down with irremovable magic glue. He'd have to carve out the bricks.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


On Christmas day, after the rush of opening presents, eating dinner, and playing muggle games with the Potter's. Both boys were chilling in James' room, listening to his new records. With the money that he got from his birthday and Christmas, Sirius could now get the motorbike to fix up. Even James had gotten a scrap car to fix up, both finding a passion in muggle mechanics.

As expected, James had tried to remove the poster and now had a very large paint chip in his wall from where he attempted to peel it off. That had resulted in the biggest wrestling match of their life. It was definitely worth it though.

"Padfoot." The boy spoke up from his bed and Sirius dropped his bike magazine to look at him. "On the train, the other day. What did Eleanor mean? What is my ego compensating for?" This had been something that had boggled his mind for the past two days. All though he was very academically smart, James Potter was not always the brightest. Sirius couldn't help the laugh that he let out, just because he knew that this boy was being serious. "Hey. What's that?" The laughter died off as he looked up to see what James was staring at. An orb was circling his head, like the one that circled Eleanor months ago. Plucking the orb, a note unravelled in his hand. "Woah, that's insane."  
  
  


_When are we gift giving. I'm already going crazy here._

_-El_   
  
  


The boy smiled lightly to himself before scribbling down a reply on a black piece of parchment and he gave it to his owl. He would have to ask her how she did the orb trick, it was great. Turning back to James, he was sitting there with a 'hurry up and tell me' face. To say that he had been consistent at trying to go out with Lily since fourth year, that boy was one of the most impatient people when it came to anything else. But Sirius said nothing and went back to reading.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Not everyone was having a good Christmas. For everyone but Eleanor, Isadora, and Marlene (plus those who don't celebrate) , this had been a day full of laughter, gift giving, family and festivity. The day was just a reminder to some of what little they really had. Even on a day like this, they couldn't even get a break on the supposed happiest day of the year. Everything came down to family. Whether it was a bad one, a good one, or none existent: people are formed by those around them. With a lack of love comes an desperate sense of loneliness that plagues the mind.

At this time of year, Isadora was completely isolated. She was the only one in her group to stay behind over the holidays, none of them knew that though as she hadn't wanted to bother them. The only other option was for her to go back to the orphanage, it was far worse there. A stronger reminder of how neglected she truly was. The girl had been abandoned by both of her parents shortly after being born. According to her records, she was born over international water and was left on the doorstep of an orphanage upon the ships arrival to England. She was documented as a citizen because no one knew who her parents were or where they came from. All she knew for certain was that at least one of them were East Asian, possibly Korean as she had a rounder face and a smaller nose.

When she woke up at noon, she was greeted by the emptiness of her dorm room and the silence of the Hogwarts grounds. Like every Christmas, she received new art supplies from the orphanage as her yearly present. She was extremely thankful because she had just ran out of acrylic paint and couldn't afford more. That wasn't the only thing. There was a small wrapped box. Izzy had already received everything she'd ask for, so she was puzzled. With it was a note which read:  
  
  


_Merry Christmas._

_-El x_   
  
  


She frowned lightly, knowing she specifically told the other girls not to get her anything because she couldn't gift them back. After the past four years of begging, they had stopped. She was sure she had told Eleanor too. Peeling off the wrapping paper, it became evident that this was some sort of jewellery because it was a snap box. The girl frowned before opening it. Inside was a set of earrings that she had wanted sis she got her ears pierced. One was a moon and the other was a collection of stars. A mix of awe and shock consumed her. She couldn't accept these especially since they were so expensive. How the blonde knew about these was a mystery, she'd only ever told Delilah about them and never shown anyone a picture. For the rest of the week, a grin never left her face and she didn't take them off. All she could do was write Eleanor a six page thank you letter and send her one of her best paintings with it.

Later, she attended dinner and was one of eight students left year. She was the only Hufflepuff, making the common room very eerie at night. She tugged her sleeves of her jumper over hands as her fellow students watched her arrive, clearly being the last to arrive. There was four siblings sat together, a pair of Gryffindors and a lone Slytherin - not like she knew that. Taking her chances, she decided to sit near them but not too close that they'd be confronted by her. When he looked up, she recognised him instantly. Regulus Black. He was the last person she had expected to be here. The two were acquaintances, she supposed. They had been potions partners for over a year but only spoke when they had too. Simply avoiding his eye as he searched for who had joined the table, she stared at her food just wanting to get back to her books. Her confidence was poor around her friends but it was nothing compared to the nerves she'd get when she was alone.

"I like your earrings." Someone said, attempting to make conversation. Grabbing the gold with her thumb and index finger, she traced over the pattern before turning to them. Of course, it had been the Slytherin. A heated blush dusted her cheeks as she smiled contently.

"Thank you." She replied quietly before picking at her food. The boy had slid his plate so he sat in front of her, the two stayed in silence as they ate. For some reason, it wasn't that awkward but that constant fear of humiliating herself was stronger then ever.

"So, why are you staying over the holidays?" Regulus asked, trying to engage in general conversation as they waited for pudding to be served. She had been biting her nails to keep her mind focused otherwise her anxious thoughts would consume her.

"Huh?" She was slightly caught of guard. "Oh. I'm here every year. No one to go back to." Isadora answered honestly with a tight lipped smile.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry." He said apologetically as he observed her, she always seemed to be keeping busy. Where she was twisting her stud earrings or picking at the skin around her nails: she was constantly fidgeting around others. She only really stopped when she was alone or with someone she truly liked.

"No, I don't mind. Actually, its nice to tell someone." Isadora expressed, resting her head on her arm. She had a dreamy smile on her lips on her face as she stared at the wall, picturing another life. There was something different about her, something that drew in the youngest Black and he had no idea why.

"What do you mean? Have you not told your friends?" Reg asked, confused. She just shook her head. It was nothing to smile about but he felt special, for once. He was chosen first, by this girl who'd shared less then a hundred words with beforehand. When the desert appeared, they both reached for their favourite. Lemon meringue pie. Their eyes snapped up to meet each other.   
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


In the late evening on boxing day, the Westbrook residency was awfully quiet. Even when they were out, there was some sort of commotion. Tonight there was nothing as all four of them had headed out. Leaving the house as lonely as it had been for the past five years. Like every year, there had been invites sent out for the annual ball, though this time they wouldn't be attending Schivon Manor.

Earlier that day, the family had gotten all dressed up and apparated to the bakery ten minutes away. They appeared in an alleyway besides his new business, Conan took the lead and walked through the front door being greeted by a muggle family from the village they lived in. He guided them to the back room where he knocked a specific beat on spare door that immediately opened. The four got in the room and began to move down, the doors opening to a grand ballroom with house elves setting up the remainder of the seating arrangements. Deep down, the blonde knew that this would not end well. It was for more then just another ball. For instance, this would be a very practical spot for hiding. Disguised with muggles, magically protected, a massive extension charm on the room. When not in use this would be nothing but a normal basement.

Now, she was on door duty. Greeting guests with that 'hypnotising smile, just like your mothers'. That is what Conan had said. Eleanor didn't mind though, she got first pick of gifts that were given - her favourite being the expensive whiskey. There was a few people here but most where yet to come. This event was one of the most prestigious events of the year and everyone had gone all out. From petticoats to old Victorian ballgowns, Eleanor felt under dressed. She would give her self points for having the prettiest dress though. The first layer was a skin-tight, corseted top, mocha mini dress and over that was a bronze, and baby pink, glittered tulle, a-line, dress that had a slit through the centre. All of it was kept up by a thick brown hand-embroidered belt that wrapped around her waist tightly. Eleanor spent about half of her life in ball gowns and had grown used to the impracticality and comfortableness of them, she had to look good otherwise there was no use for them.  
  
  


"Eleanor, Darling! Its so good to see you, again." Walburga Black said, pulling her into a tight hug. She had to try her hardest to snarl or say something to the woman. "And what a beautiful young women you have become." She added and the girl smiled at her.

"Rox, come get their coats. Please." The blonde called to the nearby house elf. Both Orion and Walburga dumped their outerwear on the poor thing as if he was scum. She really had to bite her tongue. _Maybe I should have been the actress_ , Eleanor joked in her thoughts. "Its lovely to see you too, Mrs Black. My father and Annabeth should be with the Nott family, centre left table." El advised and with a nod the two dispersed that way, leaving the girl to shiver at their presence. It wasn't long until more faces started to roll in. The Lestrange's, the Travers', the Mulciber's who were accompanied by Barty Crouch Jr, the Yaxley's and many more.

"Evening, dear." The matriarch of the Avery family greeted her at the door, her husband cowering behind their six sons, even though he was a notorious death eater. These were the last guests on the list. The two oldest had already left Hogwarts years ago and was working in her father's company and rumours had began to spread that they too were part of Voldemort's growing army. Then there was Avery who was looking as smug as ever. His younger brother that had started Hogwarts this year and a set of twins that were barely six. "Don't you look stunning." The woman complemented, scanning her dress with delight. Mrs Avery was very fashion forward herself. Eleanor could quite easily sense all of the eyes on her.

"You too. Where's your dress from?" She questioned politely, observing the fine silk gown that was paired with a ruby necklace. One in similar style to hers. She saved her mothers necklace for special occasions out of fear of breaking it. Tonight, like at the ball, she wore the garland necklace with pride. It was shown off to everyone as she had an embellished, modern updo with a few strands framing her face.

"I made it myself." Mrs Avery answered with pride, lifting the dress lightly to observe the material.

"Well, I love it." Eleanor told her honestly with a bright smile that could make even the darkest of hearts light again. There was a small clear of the throat and Mrs Avery's demeanour became cold once more. She turned to her family and motioned for her husband to start walking as she followed behind.   
  
  
  
  
  


"Not so outspoken are we, now." Avery said to her as she caught up to the group to join the party. Her eyes flickered his way as she raised a brow at his amused grin.

"That's because I'm not utterly stupid, unlike some." She retorted as they both stood side by side at the bar. It was barely an hour in and she was already fed up with everyone here. "You learn very swiftly, in my household, when to pick your battles. I can't say I want to sprout my opinions when I am one versus two hundred."

"Wasn't it you who said that you should stick up for what you believe in, even when nobody else does?" He remembered from one of their past conversations.

"Maybe you should spend less time thinking about me and focus on yourself." El responded, leaning on the bar out of boredom. "And just because someone isn't talking about their opinions, doesn't mean that they don't have them." She added as he glanced over her.

"Scared of what people might say?" Avery asked as the bartender passed him his drink, she didn't reply as her head dipped slightly. "Don't worry, Princess. I'll protect you." He whispered to her before pushing away from her. A ghostly rush of air sweeping into where he just stood. The girl was frozen to the spot processing what he had said. She grabbed her drink and stood up, eyes scanning the group. Avery had joined his Slytherin friends but they were all looking her way. Each as smug as the last. Something was going to happen. Something bigger then she could anticipate. Something more horrific then anything Hogwarts had seen.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"I have to say, Conan, you have two magnificent daughters. Especially Eleanor. I can see you've raised her right." Walburga complimented as they dined. The Westbrook was seated on a table of six with his wife, Walburga, Orion, Raven (Mrs Avery) and Ralph (Mr Avery).

"I agree with you Walburga," Raven chimed in, pausing to have a sip of her wine. "Quite honestly, I'm worried you've raised her too well. That girl is far too kind for her own good. She treats everyone equally. I know how your family has to separate from your true views in the media to keep the support of the muggles but that girl is exactly like her mother. She'll end up helping the wrong person and she'll be done for. I've heard of how some of the boys in Slytherin talk about her and she would be the first person to help them even if they deserve it or not." She added as she cut her food. That is what he was afraid of, the blonde would turn out exactly like her mother. There was room in this world for as people as trusting and generous as her. After all the hardship he'd put her through, he had hopped she would have become as bitter as he was but there was no such luck, not even Annabeth had been able to make her crumble.

"Didn't she end up in Gryffindor? I know Adelaide was placed into Slytherin but I haven't heard much about the other." Walburga commented, intrigued by the subject. The man clenched his fork tightly, not a matter he wanted to discuss. His wife grabbed his hand and began to talk.

"Yes, she has. Although it is not the desired choice as the two girls would have been better together, I think it works better for them." Annabeth explained calmly as her thumb drew circled on the back of the man's hands.

"I don't think it is necessarily a bad house, it is the people you have to watch out for. All about wanting peace between wizard folk and muggles. It's that Dumbledore, he fills them with all this propaganda. I tell you what, give it a few years and they'll come to their senses. They're just teenagers trying to find a way of life, they'll realise that we were right." Orion proposed and received a multitude of hums in agreement.

"Your Sirius, he ran away, didn't he? Do you think he'll rejoin you after Hogwarts? His friends were the ones who persuaded him out of his old ways after all." Raven replied, the mention of him stung Walburga harshly. Although her face never showed her emotion, she deeply loved her son. How couldn't she? He was her first born and reminded her of herself in her youth before a marriage was arranged for her. Disowned from the family, she would continue to love him and hoped he'd change his mind one day like she had. This would stay with her till her grave.

"I believe with Eleanor being his friend at that school, he has an ultimatum. If he chooses correctly, he might. You remember how close the two used to be." Walburga replied as she finished off her main course. It all came down to the boys decisions. At the end of the day, she was his mother and it pained her to see him now. Stepping off that train, he would now smile and not dread who was on the other side. He was greeted with hugs and welcomes, something that she wished she could have done but was too afraid to do.   
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


A few nights had passed and the day that they were all going to meet up itched closer. She had been pent up studying or dancing with only the occasional visit to Lily being permitted. It was absolute hell. She mainly kept up in her room till mealtime to avoid her step-mother particularly. There had been limited messages from her friends too, except for them thanking her for their presents and she had received Isadora's painting which she framed and hung up in her room. It was a portrait painting of the view from the astronomy tower. It was beautiful.

Heading down the stairs, she was stopped by the knock on her door. She pushed forward and pulled the door open, revealing a shivering blonde in nothing but heavy boots, skinny black jeans, a leather jacket that was decked out in pins and a band shirt. Beside her was a trunk, from Hogwarts. The girl instantly knew it was Marlene. When she turned around to face the girl, the first visible thing was her tear stained cheeks and red puffy eyes.

"Marlene? What's wrong?" Eleanor questioned, in absolute shock at the state of distress that Marls was in. She thew her arms over the girl as she began to break into more tears on her chest. "Shhh, it's okay. I'm here now." She whispered to her soothingly, resting her head on top of the girl as she sobbed harshly.

"Eleanor, who is it?" Her step-mother asked after excusing herself from the table to check the commotion. Coming to the door, she stumbled across the scene and was taken aback. "What's happened?" She said, horrified. Worry plagued the women's face, real worry.

"I-I don't know." El responded. With one look at the trunk, Annabeth pulled the luggage inside. Deciding she was a run away or was abandoned. Being both of those happened to her as a child and she would never let any child go homeless, whether they were pureblood, halfblood, muggleborn or even muggle.

"Take her upstairs. She's absolutely freezing. I'll get one of the house elves to bring her things up." Annabeth explained and the blonde nodded. Slowly pulling away, she helped to guide Marlene up the stairs and to her room. Both sitting on her bed after El had shut the door. Marlene's lip quivered as she went to speak and began to cry once more. Pulling her in once more, she caressed the crying girls cheek soothingly. They must have stayed like that for at least half an hour. Holding her close. Whispering that she's safe. Keeping her protected.   
  
  


**_TW_ **   
  
  


"I'm so sorry, El. I-I didn't know where to go." Marlene blubbered, quite out of character for the girl. Eleanor immediately frowned.

"Don't be sorry. My home is yours." She told her as a few more tears dampened her t-shirt. Lightly grabbing Marlene's face, she wiped away the tears with her thumbs. "Now. Do you want to talk about what happened?" Ellie asked and the blonde sucked in a very shaky breathe.

"They-y kicked me out-t." Marlene stuttered from the thought. "Well. M-M-My dad did. Mu-um was ac-actually happy for me." The girl began, not sure how to explain this without reliving it. "They we-were talking about the p-protests again, the ones about gay rights. My f-fucking human rights and I couldn't take it anymore. The way t-they spoke about me, about us!" She stuttered less, the angrier she got. "He wished that they could get away with-" Marlene completely stopped what she said, not having the stomach to repeat what he had even said. "Shit. I-I got so angry. The way he wanted to stop people from loving each other, I couldn't stomach his or m-my brothers words any longer. So, I began to yell. He asked me w-why I cared so much. Then he got suspicious and my mum got worried where this was going. After a while, I kind of just screamed 'I am a lesbian, whether you hate me or not.' Because I realised recently that I do only like girls. That was the first moment I have feared for my life. The look on his face, El, it was nothing but pure hatred." She recounted as her heart began to beat louder and faster then any time before, Eleanor squeezed her hand tightly as an encouragement. To know she was indeed not alone and that nothing had changed. There was not many words that came to mind as her heart had been crumbling at each of her words.

"Then he kicked you out?" Eleanor inputted but the blonde shook her head.

"I wish. He started throwing things about the room in a fit. And he- he." She sucked in another breath as her tears began to brim at her eyes again. "He was shouting. A lot. Saying 'I didn't raise you and give you everything for you to turn into a fucking fag.' and 'No daughter of mine, under my roof, is fucking other women.'" Marlene spat venomously, clenching her hand over Eleanor's - who after hearing this let a few tears slip as a pit formed in her stomach from the vile words coming from Marlene's lips. "My mum tried to calm him but it didn't work. He had evidently made up his mind. Giving me ten minutes to get packed and get out of his house. My mum came and helped me pack. She knows that there is no persuading him. What she told me was that she 'doesn't support this life style but if I'm happy,' she 'is okay with it' because I'm her daughter. And I think that hurt more. She won't truly except. Never. Then I left. Your the only one that knows - so I came here. I know it is dangerous but I hitch hiked here." She explained which made sense. Marlene and her family came from East Yorkshire, which was about four hours away from her.

"Listen to me." Eleanor spoke up, as she held both of her hands. "I know it is not the same but I will always love you, Marls. You and whoever you want to love are valid. Don't ever forget that. It is me and you now. Anything you need, I have. Okay. You are so loved."

A/N: I want to clarify that I am bi. I don't use the word often and if you want to reclaim it, that's entirely up to you! I wanted to be as accurate and realistic as possible in this story and homophobia was huge in the 70s. I hope you all have a lovely day and are all safe x


	14. goodbye, mother.

**_chapter fourteen_ **

「 _goodbye, mother._ 」

♱

I cried endlessly when you died but I promise, I won't let the tears mar the smiles that you've given me when you were alive.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _A NIGHT HAD_** passed and Marlene had settled into the guest room after Annabeth had refused to let her leave, stating that she had no where but the streets to go to. For once, the blonde had the upmost respect for her step-mother. Plus, Annabeth had not been on her back since Marlene had arrived and family life had been quite pleasant, for once. No restrictions, no stress, no pestering. It was how she wished everyday went but all good things have an ending. Nevertheless, she wasn't going to transfix on that motion and live with what she had because it would be tone before you know it.

The snow hadn't been given the chance to melt this month with the icy layers building up each day. Many roads had been blocked off, doors had been frozen shut, lakes were blocks of ice, trees branches were snapping under the weight of their icy blankets, and life as people new it was slowly coming to a halt as businesses had to close earlier and open later. There was a sense of tranquillity across the village in the early hours of the morning.

The day had started off with Eleanor practising her routine, in the spare room that Annabeth had turned into a studio, whilst Marlene slept. They had arranged to go out with Lily and the boys to go skating on the lake near the girls' houses. Delilah was expected any time soon. She got out and changed into the jeans and turtle neck that she wore to detention with Sirius. It would keep her warm, that was the important part. Throwing on a pair of trainers, she fished her skates out of her wardrobe and got a spare pair for Marlene.

As she returned to her room, there was a slight rumble and the fireplace began to expand before a girl appeared with skates dangling round her neck and a bright smile. Her tight curls had been constricted into a bun with a few wild curls sticking out here and there. The bags under her eyes were dark and was wrapped up in multiple layers. Behind her tights there was multiple light bruises and she seemed to be using the wall to prop herself up. Eleanor ran over, pulling the girl into a tight hug and she almost knocked her over in the process. When she retreated, the first thing she noticed was the girls icy touch.

"Delilah, your absolutely freezing!" She expressed in slight shock. It was like she had touched a corpse, with her skin becoming ashy and the bones starting to surface on the medium sized girl. She just shook her head and smiled.

"It's winter, El." The girl expressed, placing the skates down. "Where's Marlene? Has she arrived yet?" Delilah moved the conversation on, scanning the unfamiliar room. None of them, except Lily, had been to her house before and only knew where it was because she pointed it out when she visited them at Lily's.

"Actually, she has been staying over. She is still sleeping and I didn't want to wake her because when I tried to do that in Milan, she practically mauled me." The blonde told her, thinking back to the summer as they both laughed at the memory.

"You deserved that though. Who tries to wake someone up by pouring water on them?" A groggily looking Marlene chimed in as she entered El's bedroom wearing her black leather trousers, cropped black top, leather jacket with all her pins, her Dr Martens and dramatic eyeliner. It was good to see her looking herself again, she toned it down a lot at Hogwarts as her father was a very conservative man and she didn't want it getting back to him. Now, she didn't care. "Hello, Lilah. How was you Christmas?" She asked after giving the girl a hug as they all sat on her bed.

"It was great. I got lots of new seeds to plant! I can't wait to go back and add more to the garden." She expressed. "I got to see Edith which was nice, Aaron had invited her over. I can't believe we've only known her two months. She's leaving us at the end of the year like Alice which isn't great." Delilah huffed out, taking a strong liking to the girl.

"That's what I said to Alice. We have to make as many memories as possible. I'm working on a plan to get us out to my summer house after the end of the year." Eleanor explained, staring at the ceiling. She knew all too well about the limited time they had left. People had started to go missing, only five this year but she had a feeling it was going to get worse.   
  
  


Half an hour later, Eleanor was summoned downstairs with the other two to greet Lily at the door. Everyone made sure they had everything they needed as they were gift giving afterwards. They had put names into a hat and picked one person each so it was affordable for everyone, even though Eleanor sent everyone a gift anyways. She had gotten Peter which she was happy about, knowing exactly what to get him.

The four climbed through the woods together, already hearing the laughs of the boys nearby. Eleanor had asked them to set off twenty minutes ago so she wondered how they got there so fast, she could probably link it to the shrinking boy on the first full moon of Hogwarts. Not like she'd say anything. As soon as they got to the lake, they were greeted by Peter and James trying to ambush Sirius and Remus with snowballs. It didn't take one to come hurling their way, hitting Eleanor on the back of the head. She let out a light gasp upon impact and turned to see a very smug looking Sirius Black at the bottom of the small hill.

The landscape was drenched in a thick layer of snow, burying everything from the trees to the large boulders on the lakes edge. It was possibly the best place to be in all seasons. With the vast array of foliage, animals, and scenery in general, it was truly breath taking. The girls had previous spent many summers here and she always remembered all the winters that Florence and Rose took the two bestfriends skating. The last time they went was on her eleventh birthday as winter had come late that year.

"Your so dead Black!" She called to him as the four girls ran down the hill, placing their things with the others. Immediately getting to work, they had unconsciously decided to team up against the boys. Taking cover behind a large rock with Lily, she began throwing snowballs. One hitting James right in the face causing an uproar of laughter.

"So, that's how you want to play?" James called out as he gathered some snow. Smirks growing on each boys face as if they had some sort of mutual understanding. It didn't take long for their snow ball fight to get in full swing. Left, right, and centre; there was no escaping the blasts of ice. Nobody was safe. They laughed, fell, and most importantly insulted. Delilah attempted to run only for Remus to grab her and douse her in snow. Both smiling like complete idiots.

"Do your worst Black." She called as they stood head to head, both with a stack of snow balls. Waiting for the other to throw first.

"Don't tempt me Westbrook." He replied, a smirk pulling on his lips. She couldn't take it and sent one hurling at him, hitting his chin. Grabbing her remaining snow balls, she ran trying to dodge them. He blocked her path though. They stood centimetres away from him as they glared at one an other with a mischievous glints in their eyes. "What you going to do now?" He asked challengingly.

"Well, if you hadn't noticed. There is ice behind you." Eleanor said and as he looked behind him, she knocked down his legs but before he could completely fall he pulled her down with him. Letting out a little screech, she soon began to laugh after landing on him.

"You know. You look much better below me." The boy said making her dramatically gasp, hitting his shoulder as she tried to hold back her laugh. She got up and moved off of the ice. "Not going to help me? How rude." He said as she stuck her tongue out at him. Eleanor had headed to collect her skates, she loved skating. Doing tricks on ice came much easier for her since she did ballet, especially the muscle needed to hoist herself in the air.

She did a lap or two and came back to see some of them struggling to stand up. Apparently, only Remus, Lily, and Eleanor knew how to skate. Instead of helping them, they watched as Marls and Delilah helped each other whilst the three boys kept trying to pull each other back. They couldn't hold back their laughs as the boys topple into a heap. For a good hour, they left the three to figure it out for themselves. Once Marlene had got the hang of things, Eleanor skated off, leaving her and Lily together. Watching him struggle had lost the funniness and she had to help him before he hurt himself.

"You're both such toddlers." El commented as she approached the edge of the lake where James and Sirius sat, pouting because the couldn't be perfect at something, for one. "Come on. It's easy once you get the hang of it." She instructed, grabbing both of their hands to help them up. They slowly began to move but it didn't take long for James to trip as he became frantic. "Lily, Remus! I need some help." The blonde called out, Remus was far too busy teaching Peter and Marlene had taken a break with a Delilah. In a few seconds, Lily was helping the bespectacled boy up. "Okay, are you ready? Just hold on and try to stay balanced." She told him and he nodded. Slowly pushing off, she began to glide backwards as he held on tightly. "Just relax!" She giggled softly, making the boy smile as they locked eyes. "That's it. Now try to push yourself." Eleanor said, not letting go of him. Hesitantly he did and Eleanor was now the one gliding. That's it. Too soon. He ended up going to fast and the both fell, just dodging each other. "Practise takes time." She explained, looking at the boy who laid next to her.   
  


As they others rested on the snow, Eleanor stayed on the ice as she finally had the freedom to skate. She loved doing the upright spin, it was what came easiest to her when she began to learn actual moves. The group watched the girl twirl in the distance with such grace and intricacy, they were memorised by the way she moved. The girl built up her speed to perform her axel, she had only landed a double axel once and then fell straight after. She'd practise when everyone else had gone home.   
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Back at Hogwarts, Isadora had spent some more time with the boy over the past few days. They mostly spent their time in the library in silence, just happy to be in each others presence. It wasn't awkward and Isadora was better suited this way. She wasn't one for being grand, Marlene was the only reason she came out during the summer break. Today, however, she headed down to the gardens alone to check the skeleton landscape. Not many things grew in that garden during the winter months, only the ivy and the evergreens. It was the only time of year where she could draw the snow, even if she did almost freeze. She had sent Regulus an owl to tell him where she would be. Since they were in different houses and there was hardly anyone here, it was hard to get word around.

As she began to paint, there was a screech at the gate but minutes passed and no one showed up. If it wasn't for the darkening sky and the eerie fog that lurked through the depths of the forest, she may have believed that it was nothing. Jumping up, she slowly headed towards the entrance that had been flooded with vines. Nothing moved. Not the trees, not the lake, not the snow. Everything was perfectly still. Like she's entered another world where it was only her. Crack. She paused. Heart racing slightly. There was no one around. Not a single thing. Swivelling on her heel, she went to head back only to be consumed in her own darkness.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


On the day before New Year's Eve, Eleanor had left just before the sun had fully risen. She was thankful for the girls but it was something she wanted to face alone. Maybe it was to spare them the pain of seeing her like that or maybe it was to save herself. To her, weakness came from sensitivity but only in herself. You see, everything she hated about herself was the things that she loved on others. Engraved with her mother's acceptance and the ongoing expectations of her father. Her mind was a complete battlefield.

The graveyard was on the outskirts of Godric's Hollow, about thirty minutes from the village where she and Lily lived. It had become full a few years ago and had started a personal area beside the church to bury the newly dead of Godric's Hollow, which over the last twenty years had become a bit popular with the muggles turning the small wizarding village into one that had to suppress their magic. The only true areas untouched by muggles was Hogsmeade and a place called Erkspeek on the middle of England. They give that only ten years to be taken over too.

Steal gates stood strong, unwavering to the years of neglect and decay. They had been stood open for so long in the blistering cold that they had rusted to the spot, never to be closed again. In the early hours of the morning, it was like an eerie heaven. The path was clear of snow and was scattered with rotted leaves instead. She slowly gained sight of the snowy hilltops with the stone hedges dotted throughout. What her next challenge would be was finding her name. There never was a funeral, only the burial that Conan attended alone. Apparently he wanted to grieve alone.

With a good hour search, she stumbled across a tree that was coated in the smallest white flowers that hadn't died with the rest of the wildlife. It seemed to call out to her. Under the tree there was only one edge stone that was entwined in leaves and vines. Hesitantly, she reached out and carefully revealed the name on the large stone.

_Florence Hecate Westbrook_   
_1932-1970_   
_"Be aware of the girl who flamed with gold,_   
_only when she is truly broken will they fold._   
_For the true power will end us all_   
_And darkness within can fall._   
_He may seem to be cold and cruel_   
_But you must fight until the final dual."_

Her hand grazed over the engraving lightly as she frowned. Eleanor had dedicated the last six years to read all of the novels that her mother kept and not one contained such poetry. All her life she believed that she and her mother was close but honestly she didn't know a thing about the brunette. Collapsing back, she sat on the crunchy grass as the tree above had protected it from the layers of snow. The grave was pristine a few cracks here and there.

"Here we are, Mother. Six years later and life has some how got worse." She spoke to the stone. Her hand grazed the greenery below her that had seemed to melt. "If only you was still with us, maybe you'd be as disappointed as him. I would be. How easily they walk all over me and I just sit there. They tell me what to do and I blindly do it. As if I'm the problem. I'm going to die, just like you because I am just like you. I think that scares him more then ever because he'll have to make the next disappear and pretend like I never existed. That's a bit hard now. With the family making a weekly appearance in the newspapers and magazines. Everything would have been easier with you. This life is just a gift in disguise..." She mumbled out, talking as if her mother could hear her. "You know, I spent years blaming myself. That you defending me was the reason he decided to get rid of you. Then I realised how crazy that was." Eleanor expressed with an amused scoff. "I think it was the fact that he never let me say goodbye. Just whisked me off into this completely new life with no privacy. This is me, saying goodbye." She said as she stood up and grabbed a flower from the bush behind, plucking it from the stem. Delicately laying the flower onto the grass floor, she watched as many flowers of the same kind began to sprout around it, causing her to shuffle back in shock.

Eyes flickering upwards, a lone figure stood on the hill as a frightful tear rippled down her cheek. They were wrapped in a beautiful peach dress. One so familiar to her. The skin was as pale as the snow beneath them with dark circles and a skeleton like physique. Bile rose through her throat as the figure began to step forward. A loud bark erupted behind her as the world began to spin. Heart racing. Eyes blurring. Feet slipping. A hallucination that felt all to real. The corpse of her mother getting closer by the second. She tried to run. It felt as if she was miles away from the entrance. Upon looking back there was nothing there. No footsteps or nothing. Whilst she was distracted, she tripped though she never collided with the ground. 

Not even caring to look up, her eyes were so focused on the spot that she had seen her own mother appear from. The tears did not hold back as she fought the urge to throw up. Her mind and heart working faster then the speed of light, for a second she may have believed that she was going to implode. Everything was going so fast.

"Ella. Ella. Its okay." The voice by her spoke out but it was like she was trapped underwater and they were barely audible. There was a sense of comfort and familiarity, she wasn't alarmed but was rather soothed by this figure. She honestly didn't care anymore. A hand held her close and as she listened to the calming heartbeat and the whispers from above, she was soon brought back to the real world. Her head was no longer spinning as she pushed back lightly, revealing Sirius Black.

"What are you doing here?" She whispered weakly, feeling light headed. The boy was looking at something in the distance. A single stag stood staring at them. Though, she didn't question it. What she had just seen was far more absurd and traumatising then a lurking stag.

"Marlene realised you was gone and was worried, she asked for me to check on you since I'm two minutes away." He explained honestly, scanning the emotionless girl. "What happened?" Sirius questioned. Looking back there was a trail of peach fabric, dancing in the wind. As she blinked, it disappeared...


	15. never have i ever

  
**_chapter fifteen_ **

「 _never have i ever_ 」

♱

Savour on the moment, while still waiting for sacred time.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _"WHY HER? OUT_** of everyone to choose from, you picked the one that has no connection to anyone but her friends! Why didn't you choose one of the Westbrook's? That would send shock waves, especially since the blonde is a fucking blood traitor too." A voice called out beyond the pale curtains of the strange room. Her head was pounding and she began to slip in and out of consciousness.

"Because that is who we have been told to choose. She is undetectable. Quite and passive. Funnel secrets from the inside. That girl won't even realise that she's doing this. Why'd you care so much?" A boy with a Northern, West Yorkshire like, accent challenged the other firmly. The two seemed to be in a predicament over her. Well, who she'd discover to be her when she was of sound mind.

"I don't care. I just think it's a waste of time. You best get out of here, Avery, before someone notices that your here." They shot back as Isadora slipped back into a state of darkness. People said times were changing and the fifteen year old was not prepared for what was coming. Not yet. None of them were. That was the problem.  
  
  
  
  
  


She wasn't sure how long she was out for but when Isadora sat up, she wasn't alone. A boy was bundled into the small visitors chair as he slept sombrely. Shuffling upright so that she could be comfortable, his eyes began to twitch before opening completely. The girl was dazed and overall confused to what had happened, she barely registered that she was in the hospital wing. Eyes glassy and mind racing, she fidgeted in the bed trying to get out as she became more and more constricted. He watched her with a slight frown, unsure of what was happening. Breathing becoming short, heart thumping, and bile rising up and down her throat. It didn't make sense.

"Isadora-" Regulus spoke up, getting out of the chair as the girl sunk down to the floor. She shook her head rapidly as tears slipped down her face.

"N-no." The girl said, hardly able to form her words. One thing she knew for sure, he was the only one that knew she was there. "Stay away from me!" She shouted through her sobs, alerting the matron and professor nearby. Shoes clicked against the cobble floor as they raced into the section. Madame Pomfrey came to her aid, trying to soothe the panic attack with a spell.

"Mr Black, would you mind waiting outside with me for a minute." McGonagall stated instead of questioned, holding the curtain back for him to exit. Locking eyes with the fearful girl once more, he left without a word. She now knew. This could have been for the best. Now, they'd choose someone else...  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


The morning after the incident, she didn't say a word to the girls who waited outside of her house. She went to her room and stared at the ceiling for hours, trying to think of any valid reason to explain what just happened. Coming to the quick conclusion that she was insane, it wouldn't take a genius to figure out that the girl suffered with a multitude of untreated mental disorders. How was she ever going to explain that she saw a corpse and be taken seriously? The fact was that this wasn't the first time. She had seen her dead self in her dreams but this was different.

Something hit her and she instantly sat up as the thought came to mind. The flower. She had picked them from a bush and they had began to grow. That wasn't right. Like the flowers on the tree, that wasn't supposed to happen. Grabbing a pair of her shoes, she looked out the window to see that Sirius was still talking to Lily. Four hours had passed since he walked her back in silence. Marlene had tried to talk to the blonde but had given up and returned to her room. Pulling open the door, the girl in the room across from her and they stepped into the corridor at the same time.

"Ellie..." She said as Eleanor darted towards the stairs with the girl hot on her tail.

"You want to know what happened? Well. I saw my mother." El explained flinging the back door open as Marlene jogged to keep up with her. "But before that, there was this tree and the flowers hadn't died. It is the middle of Winter. They should be dead."

"Hold on. You saw who? El that's not fucking normal." Marlene expressed but the girl didn't bother listening to her. She raced over to the flower bed and plucked one from the selection.

"I know, you don't have to tell me that. That is not what you should be worrying about at this moment. Seeing things is not out of the norm for me but this... This is new." She replied as they walked over to a dead patch of bushes in the garden. Marlene blinked at her statement, not quite sure how to respond.

"Woah. Wait. El." The blonde called out to her, knowing she wasn't of sound mind. Sitting down, El placed down the plant and closed her eyes. Marlene watched carefully, it was if she had lost her mind. Though, she decided to kneel beside her. When her eyes snapped open, nothing had changed and Marlene could see the disappointment rage across the girls face. "What is it El? What are you trying to do?" She asked quietly, still not sure about the whole situation.

"They're supposed to grow, Marls." Eleanor mumbled back to her, hanging her head low. Maybe she wanted this to work so she could feel special for once. Maybe she didn't want it to work so she could return to that spot. Maybe everything was finally getting to her and this was the final claw for some sort of comfort. She truly didn't know anymore and that's what upset her.

"Come on, I asked Rox to cook up some cinnamon swirls." Marlene said, holing out her hand for the girl. With a moment of hesitation, Eleanor grabbed her hand and they headed inside together.

Little did they know that the land slowly became flushed with a new lease of life. The grass began to slowly grow and the flowers began to blossom, in the middle of winter. It was unheard of. That dead patch of garden had become a paradise for plants and animals alike, shortly after the girls had returned to Hogwarts causing her father to rip each blade of grass from that piece of land.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Later that evening, Isadora was allowed to leave the wing with McGonagall escorting her back to the Hufflepuff common room. There was only three days until everyone returned to the school but she had to send Eleanor a letter. She clearly knew that she was still there and knew she'd be able to help after her run in with the Slytherin's a month ago.

Heading straight to her room, she pulled out her parchment, quill, and ink before heading towards her bed. The empty room was ghostly, a cold breeze passed over as Marlene's posters flickered due to the cracked window. She stood up and turned the heater on, hoping it would warm up quickly.

As soon as she finished writing, she opened the window and sent her owl on her way. Deciding that she was going to stay in her room until the rest of them came back. The kitchen was next door so it wouldn't be much of an issue. She laid on her bed and noticed that there was something under her pillow. The girl frowned and pulled out the small box. Chocolates. Blinking at the gift, her hand immediately reached for the tag.

_Merry Christmas, Isadora._

That was it. No name, no nothing. She scoffed lightly and threw them onto the side table. Sure, she may have eaten them if it wasn't for overhearing the two boys argue outside her room. They'd have to try harder then that. She curled up in her bed, not believing that she trusted him. Yes, they had only talked for a week but he was different to everyone else she had met. They kind of clicked. That was clearly all in her head. For once she felt like she belonged and wasn't in the way, she was wrong all along.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Aerosmith was currently blaring throughout the house as the four girls had gathered in Lily's room to get ready for the evening. When Eleanor turned up, the redhead was prepared to discuss what had happened but, like every time something bad happened to the girl, she pretended like everything was okay. She had slipped past her and blared the music, followed by Marlene who joined her. So she went along with it. They spent the hours singing, laughing, dancing, and getting ready.

With Marlene borrowing some of Eleanor's clothes, she had picked up a black skater skirt and paired that with a black lace bralette. Adding some fishnets, stolen thigh high socks, a pair of Dr Martens, and her leather jacket to complete her outfit. She had used her hairspray to make her hair large and messy with smudge eyeliner to get her usual aesthetic.

Going the complete opposite to Marlene, like always, Delilah wore a lilac milkmaid dress with a pair of white trainers and layers of silver jewellery. Her hair was in it's natural tight coils that she had picked out with her comb to get more of an Afro effect. Today, she had gone with more of a bold eye look as she used white eyeliner and a dark purple lipstick.

The redhead had opted for dark brown high-waisted bell bottoms and paired that with a cropped light brown button up which exposed a bit of under boob. She added some gold hanging earrings and some gold rings before putting on her Dr Martens and a small bag to put a few things in. Lily was prepared for everything at all times.

And then there was Eleanor who had opted for a strapless black leather dress, something not everyone could pull off but of course she made it work. Along with that she wore her platform oxfords with thigh high socks, her signature look. For once, she had straight hair and it had taken her at least two hours to do her full head. She had kept her makeup quite natural except for her eyeliner and a bold red lip.

When the girls partied, they partied hard and looked hot doing so. Not like that mattered to them though, they were just there to enjoy themselves. The group had gone through a bottle of vodka already, needing to get those pre-drinks before even deciding to head to Potter's. Lily needed them especially.

"Quick Lily! Run!" Delilah squealed pulling the girl towards the other three as they all tried to pose for the camera. Thankfully, the flash went off before they all tumbled with a laugh.

"Ow! That's my foot Delilah." Marlene yelped as they landed in a heap. They all got up slowly, brushing themselves off. The blonde headed over to the record player and took the vinyl off as they prepared to leave. An obnoxious laugh came from down the stairs, alerting the group to Petunia's arrival. El and Marls had been getting an earful from the redhead about how dreadful her sisters boyfriend was and they all hoped that he wouldn't be here. That was wishful thinking.

Heading down the stairs, they were greeted by a piggish looking man with cold glare and a very stiff posture. Although he wasn't large, he was certainly getting there with his belly hanging slightly over his low waist work trousers. He clearly had trouble breathing as he struggle to suck in a breath, possibly because his belt was far too tight. When he spotted the girls, from one look alone the blonde knew how pretentious he would be. They gathered by the door as Petunia came storming over, glaring from Lily to El. At a young age, the three spent all their time together but she was not impressed when they both turned out to be a witch and she didn't. Back then, she could understand the girls pain but every time Eleanor saw Petunia she became a little bit more insufferable. Their friendship was beyond repair. Lily tried her hardest with her sister but the brunette was the most stubborn women to grace this planet. Even with her vile words, Eleanor could still see the pain present in the woman's eyes. She had been abandoned and no one truly recovers from that. Instead of making amends with her sister, Petunia tried everything to push Lily away and, no matter what pain the woman brought, the redhead would continue to try.

"Where on earth do you think your going?" She scoffed, scanning their outfits. "Especially dressed like that." Petunia spat out of jealousy, no one was safe from the curse of the Westbrook's beauty. Something that the women had grown to despise as she saw it as another thing that she couldn't be the best at. It was quite sad, really. There was no denying Petunia's natural beauty -just like Lily's- but her bitterness was slowly dragging out her youth and was being replaced by a stony facade.

"We're going to a party. It is New Years after all. Mum and Dad know, plus I left them a note with Potter's address." Lily explained calmly, flashing her sister a polite smile that only made the woman frown more. Both blondes had been holding hands as Eleanor became increasingly more agitated by the pair of beady eyes that were trained on her figure.

"Another one of you freaks? God. I can't believe they let you go. Your an embarrassment to this family and so are all your little friends." She snarled as Marlene stepped forward, ready to fight. The only thing keeping her back was Eleanor, who whispered 'this is what she wants' which relaxed Marls for a moment. Grabbing hold of the redhead, Ellie guided her to Delilah who helped her out the door, leaving the two blondes to glare at the older sister.

"She has been nothing but kind to you. It is not her fault that your not special." Eleanor whispered in a stern tone before pulling Marls out the door. The woman swallowed the lump in her throat as she watched the four link arms and laughed, walking down the country roads. Though Petunia would never admit that, El was right. It wasn't her fault but a part of her was still so angry that the redhead was chosen and she wasn't. It was easier to push away the girl that got everything that she wanted then suffer in silence. Hearing the scuffling of a body, she rolled her eyes at the thought of the man. Lily had everything: the friends, the kindness, the brains, the popularity, and boys fawning all over her. It was hard to compete with such a girl that she stopped trying to match her and started to ridicule her instead. A split second of happiness from a snide comment was all she had. To everyone, even their parents, Petunia was and always would be subpar.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"Prongs, mate. Come enjoy the party. They'll be here soon." Sirius said as he passed the boy a drink, which graciously took. Since guests had began to arrive, he had been waiting at the window and answering the door as he waited for a certain redhead to show. The others had no clue what his plan was when she arrived but he had been nervous all day. The Lily Evans was willingly coming to his house, thanks to El's and Delilah's nagging. He thought he was dreaming when Sirius told him that they would be attending.

"Yeah. Right. Party. Got it." He mumbled standing up. James had opted for some jeans, a plain white t-shirt that was tucked in and a light brown flannel. Whereas, Remus had gone with grey peg top pants, a tucked in black t-shirt and some black brogues. Peter wore his usual dark blue baggy jeans and black baggy top with a pair of random black trainers to match. Then, there was Sirius who wore black jeans with a tucked white t-shirt that went well with his leather jacket and trainers. His hands were covered in a combination of different rings. A part from Remus, none of them had a specific style and was always changing what types of clothes they wore.

At around half past eight, there was a knock at the door followed by a tall blonde with a half empty bottle of fire whiskey in one hand and the other flew up as she gave James a hug.

"Hello, Jamsie. Miss me that much did ya?" El asked with a lopsided grin, on that he returned immediately.

"You know me so well." He returned before they greeted the next set of people. The girl gave Peter and Remus a hug before joking Sirius side.

"If we get Delilah the right level of tipsy, where she not drunk yet but has that extra level of confidence those two might be able to kiss each other without making a mess of themselves." Eleanor said as she watched the two hug. The boy beside her laughed slightly as he watched them too, they were currently exchanging whispers like two little school kids.

"I think we should do the same for Remus. He will have something new to talk about other then the same thing every night." The boy replied, internally groaning at all the nights that Remus spent whining over the mysterious flower girl and now Delilah. It would at least make their talk interesting since none of them had been successful in the women's department.

"Oh. So, we're the topic of conversation, are we?" Eleanor stated more than asked as she looked up to the boy with a smirk.

"No but you can be, if you want." He replied with a wink. She was thanking those above for the invention of foundation as it hid the blush that was currently running rampant across her cheeks. Simply laughing to cover up her tracks, she rolled her eyes sarcastically at him as their friends regrouped with them.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After an hour or so, the girl had decided to go look for their other friends as the drinking games begun. She had dragged Marlene and the other two with her as they searched for Mary and Alice. They knew that they were coming as the oldest of the two had sent a letter to them as they both lived in the same town. The four hadn't seen anyone except the boys so it would be nice to start the year together. It didn't take long to find the group of seven years that were accompanied by Mary and Dorcas.

"Fancy seeing you here." Eleanor called as she approached them, hopping over the seat as she threw her arm around Aaron to give him a quick hug. The other three took their places with Lily awkwardly greeting Jack and Marlene giving Edith and Dorcas a hug too. Like usual, Frank and Alice were quite cosy with one another, as if they weren't truly there at all and were in their own little bubble.

"Alright, El?" Aaron asked as she moved away from him so she could give Edith a hug. The two were an odd pair who had been on a few dates but ultimately remained friends, although they seemed closer then they were before. Eleanor was just glad that they hadn't forced themselves into a relationship as they was a lot of external pressure to get coupled up.

"Yeah. How are you two?" She asked kindly, taking a sip of her drink to keep her mind occupied from fussing over what she looked like.

"I'm good. I've been busy though, I hardly got out the house except when I visited him for Christmas. My parents are going completely crazy over my NEWTs. If Dorcas hadn't of explained that I needed a break, they'd still have me pent up in my room studying!" Edith answered first and the girl looked absolutely shattered, all the seventh years did as they knew that their time was running out.

"I'm okay. Can't say I've done much studying, I'll be alright though." Aaron shrugged with a smile, causing both girls to shake their heads at him. "Enough about school though," He said as a new track came on. Lily instantly lit up and she grabbed the blonde, pulling her to dance to her favourite track.

"Having fun with Jack?" El called over the music to the girl who hid her face momentarily. The two were dancing together, swaying their hips and spinning each other as they giggled.

"Yes, actually. Every time I'm with him, I feel guilty. I don't know. I like him but I don't know if he's the right one." Lily explained as they danced through the crowds. The blonde paused and just smiled, confusing the other. "What?"

"Lily. We're sixteen, we're not supposed to find the 'right one' straight away. This is your time to experiment! Take the risk. Sure, it may not last but you might discover something about yourself in the process." Eleanor replied to her as they stood by the drinks table, each grabbing a bottle each.

"You know what, you're right. How did you get so wise?" Lily asked, squinting her eyes at her before breaking into a large smile.

"Experience, dear. Experience." She told her, leaning into the girl as they linked arms to find the others, wanting to dance with them too.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


At school, Isadora had spent the day in her bed just waiting for some form of message back. She was spent her time reading the muggle novel 'Pride and Prejudice' for the hundredth time, no man could ever live up to a character written by a woman. That false sense of reality that a man like that may exist kept the young girl clinging to the idea of love. Unfortunately, it was often more harmful then good. Constantly upholding fictional characters to the same level as real people definitely messes with ones mind. Not like Isadora cared, living in the world she creates in her head was far better then anything that life had to offer to her.

Her stomach grumbled after a while and, with a sigh, she threw on her large hoodie and trainers before heading out of the common room. Marlene had been the first person in their year to figure out where the kitchen and told both the girls and the marauders how to get in. That came in very handy for moments just like this. Tickling the pear, she entered to see only two elves in. One of them came running over to greet the girl. She asked for a sandwich, something simple as she hadn't had much of an appetite since she awoke.

The ambience was nice in the kitchen, quite soothing if you asked her. After thanking the house elf, she took her sandwich and sat on the surface to eat. Her legs swung back and forth as she had a bite or two, just enjoying her time out of her room. Obviously, someone had to disrupt her. The painting opened, revealing the last person she wanted to see. Of course, that was just her luck wasn't it. She threw the sandwich down and hopped off the counter, keeping her head down.

"Isadora. Wait." He called after her as she slipped past him. Grabbing her wrist, he pulled her to a halt as she was about to enter her common room. Although, he immediately let go when he saw the way her eyes went wide. "Just listen to me. Alright. I can explain." Regulus said, looking pained over the girls fear.

"What? So you can can lie to me? So in a year time you can turn around and blame everything on me?" She questioned with a shaky voice but the girl was trying her hardest to stay strong. His face contorted into a deeper frown with each word.

"I would never do that. You have to believe me." The boy said as his only defence, he only had his word to go on at this point. His face was stone cold but his eyes dazzled with pain. They had just met, he couldn't lose someone so soon.

"Why should I believe you? People like you don't go mixing with muggleborns." She argued, crossing her arms over her chest as he sighed in defeat. Unfortunately, she was right. The boy didn't even know why he had decided to talk to her, unlike other muggleborns he didn't look down his nose at her. That was something he could never explain.

"Look. Whether you believe me or not, it wasn't me. I came down and found you in the snow. Just be careful. Okay." Regulus told her, running a hand through his hair. Glancing at her teary eyes, he shook his head and left. But she didn't move, Isadora stood there, thinking over all that he had just said. Was it possible that he was telling the truth? _Don't be stupid,_ she thought. One thing that Isadora refused to do was give out her heart to someone that would crush the remnants of the broken pieces. Not now, not ever. Letting someone in was one of the hardest things that Isadora could do, that's why she sought comfort in the blonde Westbrook.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Somehow the two blondes had ended up in the kitchen. They were sitting side by side, their faces were sometimes illuminated by the flashing disco lights that were going off in the boys living room. Both had slipped away from the party between Edith downing a whole bottle of whiskey in ten seconds and before some people had gotten up on the table to dance. This was the only place that wasn't crowded with people, bar upstairs but that's a bit invasive of the boys' privacies.

"You must like someone. For the past three years, you've said the same thing 'I don't know, nobody's that interesting.' There must have been someone, even if it was like- a small crush or they caught your eye." Eleanor said to her, leaning her head on Marlene's shoulder as Marls was in the corner.

"I mean, there's someone. I suppose but I don't know if they like girls. And then there's this other girl who is just someone that I can never get out of my mind." She admitted, taking the bottle from the blonde and took a sip before placing her head back on top of El's.

"And who would they be?" Eleanor asked, quite intrigued on the matter. The one thing that Marlene didn't discuss much was her love life, she was an open book about everything else. Tensing up slightly, the two sat in silence. "If you don't want to tell me, why don't you describe them?" She suggested, fidgeting in her seat to get comfortable.

"Well. The first is level headed, she's strong, often underestimated and absolutely beautiful, even if no one else notices. The two are more alike then I realised, until now..." Marlene began, staring at the cabinets at the end of the galley kitchen.

"And the other?" Ellie asked, now the one to take a swig from their shared bottle. There was less than five minutes until midnight and everyone was scrabbling outside to watch the fireworks that the neighbours were setting off to celebrate.   
  


"Where are the other two?" Lily asked Delilah as they gathered in the garden, she was hugging herself to keep warm in the freezing December weather.

"I don't know, they'll find us eventually." She answered, leaning into Remus who looked quite on edge. His hands were bouncing up and down nervously like there was something on his mind. Nodding slowly, Lily pushed through the people and stood with Alice, looking around for the two. They were no where to be found as everyone began to count down. 10... 9... 8... Jack had joined her side and her mind was distracted.  
  


"She-" Marlene paused looking down at the girl. "Honestly, she's everything that you wish to be. Kind hearted, selfless, talented, incredibly smart, powerful but still modest. No matter what, she will never put herself above others. Everyone has their flaws but even those are perfect to me..." The girl whispered as she sucked in a deep breath. Eleanor sat upright and examined her closely, looking her in the eyes.

"I'm not an expert but it sounds like your in love with this girl." Ellie told her, taking a sip of the drink without breaking that eye contact. There was something that glistened in Marlene's eyes, one that the girl couldn't place. The count down erupted outside. _10... 9... 8..._

"Maybe your right. Since I met her that summer in 1972, I couldn't forget her. I didn't know then but I do now." Marlene explained. Everything seemed to click into place. _5... 4..._ Leaning in closer, the forehead slowly met as their eyes shuttered closed. 3...2...1... "Happy New Year." Marls whispered before their lips met. Fireworks exploded around them as others cheered around them. Her heart exploded as Eleanor cupped the the girls face. Their lips moving slowly, softly, passionately.

"Happy New Year." She replied in a soft tone, pulling away quite breathlessly. The two laughed softly as Eleanor pushed away from her, resting back on the cabinet. She held her hand though, taking another sip out the -now empty- bottle.  
  
  


As the time hit midnight, people fell into their couples. Frank kissed Alice. Lily plucked up the courage and kissed Jack. Then there was Remus, the two had been standing hand in hand when he pulled her in close. The two finally colliding as the clock hit twelve. Delilah threw her arms around his neck as she kissed him back, explosions of every colour erupting inside of her.

Some how, James and Sirius seemed to be the only ones not receiving a kiss that night. They were too drunk to even comprehend that fact. It was okay though, the two were sat in the chairs as they watched the colourful sky. Having absolutely no clue what was happening around them.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"Alright! Never have I ever. Simple rules, if you've done it, you drink." James explained, shakily pouring shots for the group of eight. The rest of the party had just left and only they remained because they had agreed to stay the night. Lily and Peter occupied the floor. Delilah rested her her head on Remus' lap and threw her legs over Sirius. In the two seater was Marlene and Eleanor who had her legs thrown over the girl. That left the armchair for James who almost slipped off of it.

"Start of easy then. Never have I ever had my first kiss." Marlene said as they all took a sip of their drink, causing three girls to go into shock. "Delilah!"

"When did this happen?" Lily questioned, a smile breaking out across her lips as she laughed lightly. The youngest of the four looked away and the boy beside her seemed to realise what that meant. He was her first kiss.

They continued to play, each one becoming lesson tame. From 'never have i ever lost a bet' to 'never had i ever made out with someone the same gender'. Somehow El had done a shot for every question and they were starting to run out of questions.

"Erm... Never have I ever... Snorted something." Delilah said, which seemed like more of a personal attack on Eleanor as she had told the girl that she had. Tipping back her drink, the blonde got up and wobbled away to fill up her cup to carry on. Nobody else had drank to that one which wasn't surprising. Did she regret doing it? Possibly. Would she do it again? 100%. In the past twenty four hours, she had grown to remember why she didn't care over the summer and it would only take another inconvenience to send her over the edge. Nobody else enjoyed that point in her life but she certainly did.

"What hasn't been said." Remus pondered out loud. "Never have I ever lost my virginity." He said and only half of them took a sip. Sirius, Marlene, Eleanor, and James - which the blonde was rather shocked by but apparently he had a girlfriend last year before he turned his attentions to the redhead.

"Building off that. Never have I ever slept with more then three people." James said, knowing full well who had. However, Lily's attention turned to the blonde that was returning to her seat.

"What?" El questioned.

"Drink up then." The very drunk ginger instructed, making Delilah chuckle to herself.

"Ah, Lily. One day you will learn that-" Ellie paused, taking her seat with all eyes on her. "they don't count unless they make you cum." She told her boldly as a smirk grew on her face. Unfortunately, Remus had took a sip of his drink at the wrong time, causing him to choke and spray out his drink in shock, getting it all over James who shrieked jumping up.

"Careful!" Lily called as the grouped laughed hysterically. They all got up beside to watch the commotion in the kitchen, except for El and Sirius. She cleared her throat and put her drink on the table after hearing the chants of the two boys play fighting.

Her eyes flickered his way, one of his brows were raised as he looked completely amused. The smirk on his lips growing when she began to flush.

"What?" She asked, narrowing her eyes at him in a drunken childishness.

"Wasn't the headlines last week: 'Eleanor, the innocent beauty'? Just thought it was funny, don't you think?" Sirius asked teasingly as she rolled her eyes, the smile still present on her bright red lips.

"Good to know that your a fan." She said, hearing the boy scoff. The smile only growing on her lips. "Sorry to break the illusion though, I know that must be terribly tragic for you." Ellie added dramatically, forcing them both to start giggling in their haze.

What the blonde didn't see was the girl who watched them. How her heart clenched a little. What ache circled her body. As Marlene watched the two, she noticed everything that everyone else didn't. Like the way Eleanor smiled a little brighter or how she was her truer self around this boy. To this day, the girl had weaselled her way out of telling the three how she knew Sirius even though she was supposed to tell Lily on his birthday. The other thing she noticed was how Sirius treated her. Not once in her five years of school had she seen him treat anyone the way he treated Eleanor, not even James. To be honest, Sirius was quite a horrible person, especially outside of their group. The blonde made him a better person, she made everyone a better person. The marauders especially. Compared to every other year, the bullying was down to only Snape this year. Yes, they had matured -probably due to the group falling out late last year for unknown reasons- but, even September versus November, there was a massive difference. There was an undeniable twinge of jealousy, one that would never truly go away. Even if that kiss meant something, Marlene knew there was only som much time until the girl discovered her true feelings. Ones that are not directed to her but _him_ instead _..._


	16. temper

  
  
**_chapter sixteen_ **

「 _temper_ 」

♱

_Murderers are not monsters, they're men. And that's the most frightening thing about them._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _AWAKING THE MORNING_** after, everyone was a bit rough. They had some how piled into James' room even though there was multiple rooms. When the blonde woke up, the first thing she noticed was that Lily had a some point move onto the bed. Top and tailing with Potter. Then there was Delilah who had fallen asleep on Remus' chest, it was an adorable sight to see. Marlene was curled up beside her and Peter was half inside the wardrobe and half dangling out, she had no idea how that happened. There was some body missing but the clinking of a glass downstairs caught her attention. She got up and headed down the stairs in a slight daze, almost tumbling to the bottom in the process. With smudged under eyes and messy hair, she had looked far worse after other nights out and the paparazzi caught all of them. So this was significantly better.

"Morning." The boy said as she entered the kitchen, earning a grunt in return. She shuffled to the kitchen island and sat on the stool. Resting both hands on her forehead as she contemplated her choices that lead her to numbing headache. Her head shot to the cold surface of the counter and relieved her mind for a moment. When she looked up again, she was greeted by that smug smile of his.

"What?" She huffed, her lips had fallen into a small pout as his smile grew. "Why are you so joyful?" The girl asked, slightly annoyed that he wasn't suffering as well.He had changed out of his old outfit and was in some joggers and a hoodie. However, the blonde was still in her leather dress and was now regretting her choices.

"A bit of magic fixes everything." Sirius returned as he took a sip of coffee, leaning on the counter. She closed her eye for a second before they shot open. To be honest, she had completely forgot that he was of age and could preform magic outside of school.

"Could you be useful for once and help me out?" Eleanor said, agitated by seemingly everything. Her words only making him laugh.

"Ouch. You know how to break a heart, Westbrook. Now, if you ask nicely, I might consider it." He teased, raising his brow at her as he swirled his wand around fingers.

"Trying to make me beg, Black?" She asked leaning forward to rest on her arms. A small smirk was present on her lips as she glanced him over.

"I mean, I wouldn't object." The boy said as he took another sip of his drink, hiding the smile on his face. She rolled her eyes dramatically, a pain shooting down the right side of her face.

"Oh, fuck off." She laughed. "But please, help." The blonde added right after. Placing down his mug down, he pointed it at her and mumbled a spell that instantly relieved her headache. "Thank you." She said exhaling, her whole body relaxing. "Where'd you learn such a spell?"

"The boys and I made one, we were sick of spending the day hungover." He admitted proudly, placing his wand back in his pocket. In the morning sun, his skin glowed and his metal eyes twinkled. The boy was beautiful, at any given moment. At least he got one good thing from his family. It was not worth it though, let's be honest.

"How wonderfully handy." Ellie replied as she got herself a glass of water, feeling a little bit light headed from the spell. "So," She spoke, feeling his eyes on her until she turned back around. Before she could get her next words in, the door handle of the back door jiggled and two people entered, talking to each other. Her eyes flickered to Sirius who had cleared the mess with a quick spell.

"Good morning." An older looking woman said as she entered the kitchen, a bright smile on her face. She wore a matching skirt and top set in a pale pink and white combination. It was very conservative in style, especially paired with her pearls and diamond engagement ring. The blonde stood there awkwardly, waiting for some form of judgement. It never came though. "You must be, Eleanor." The woman greeted, walking over and giving the girl a hug.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Mrs Potter." She returned formally, making the woman smile a bit more. Turning to face Sirius, he had a guilty face as if she had caught him doing something he shouldn't of, even if he was completely innocent this time.

"Be a gentlemen and go get a jacket or something." Euphemia told him and when he tried to get a word in, she shooed him out of the kitchen. The blonde couldn't help but laugh lightly at his sad waddle away, like a toddler being told no. "James said that you transferred from Beauxbatons, how are you finding it here?" The woman asked as she gathered ingredients to make the teens breakfast.

"Alright, I suppose. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends here but my whole life is in France. Its weird adjusting here when I basically moved on." She explained, finishing off her water. Eleanor didn't know why she was talking so much but something about the women was so trust worthy. The woman reminded her of her own mother, they carried the same aura. 

"You lived here before? What age did you move?" Euphemia asked, wanting a confirmation on her suspicions.

"Yeah, I grew up next door to Lily. We moved a month after my eleventh birthday because my mother passed." She explained, receiving a sympathetic look from her. The woman was now certain that

"At least you knew someone, that makes things easier. I understand what you are going through though. My family originated from Delhi and though I love it there but when I go and visit, nothing feels the same. I'm sure you'll get used to it again." Euphemia explained, making the blonde feel slightly better about the whole situation. She couldn't wait to go see Celine and the girls over the summer.

"I knew a few people. Lily had introduced me to Marlene and Delilah years ago and I have known Sirius since I was -like- six." Ellie told her and she nodded, whipping up the food in seconds before setting the table.

"Wow. I didn't realise you were friends before you moved here. He definitely didn't tell James, that's for sure." The woman said, seemingly amused by her words. El could guess what she was probably thinking about.

"Here." Sirius said when he reappeared after waking up the rest of their friends for breakfast. She took it and threw it on, feeling a little less conscious now. "Can I at least get this one back?" He asked as they headed out of the kitchen.

"Now, if you ask nicely, I might consider it." She repeated his words, teasingly. Both of them smirking as they joined their friends. There was an air of silence as everyone was exhausted, except her and Sirius. They tucked into their food but Delilah seemed to be picking at hers, only settling with her fruit. Eleanor made a mental note to check on her.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


"Here she goes again. I told you she'd be nothing but trouble." Emmeline sighed as Adelaide had parted the group once more. It had become a common appearance over the last few weeks, even over the winter break when they were hanging out together.

"Yes, I know but if Clem is happy then I am too. Clem isn't avoiding us." The strawberry blonde explained, picking books off of the shelves for class. "Until Ada starts drilling into the girl that we're the enemy, we're fine and she is still our friend."

"No. She is your friend." Emma shot back, looking through her notes and the other girl sighed.

"You could at least pretend to like her, for Clem's sake." Caoimhe said, walking to their table with a stack of books.

"I'm trying. She's just- she reminds me of Violet, look what happened to Georgia. Now, she goes around being someone she is not, you can see the misery in her eyes." She replied picking up one of the books.

"Emmie... She isn't that bad. I know your weary but not everyone is trying to destroy our friendship group. Ada isn't the most liked person in Slytherin and Clem is the only true friend she has since she decided to ignore her sister." The girl said, taking a seat opposite her bestfriend.

"Yeah, what's up with that. Her sister seems quite genuine. I mean, Lily Evans likes her. That's enough for me to know that she's not like Adelaide." Emmeline retorted, knowing the redhead from third and fourth year when they were partners in potions and transfigurations. The two were definitely just the in school type of friends.

Just then, a boy came through, hoping onto their table with their back towards Emmeline. She immediately frowned, crossing her arms over her chest knowing exactly how this was going to go.

"Hello Reggie. How was your Christmas?" Caoimhe asked with a bright smile. The two had been friends since their first day at Hogwarts, they had shared a carriage on the train as they didn't really know anyone. But he and Emmeline never got along, probably due to her being muggleborn.

"Quite boring, I was here on my own as my parents went travelling." He explained, skipping over the fact that he had company that he had for the most part.

"You should have owled me, I would have met you at Hogsmeade or something." She replied, opening up her book. Her eyes flickered from the pages to the boy. It was as if the other girl wasn't there. Getting up, she grabbed her sketch book and her other study equipment. The two didn't even notice until she walked away. She ignored Caoimhe calling for her as she picked up the pace. Regulus was great friends with people that wanted her and everyone like her dead.

Practically sprinting out of the library, she collided into some as she was lost in her thoughts. Her supplies scattered across the corridor. She looked down to see a girl with lime green hair sprawled across the floor with a blonde trying to help her up. The two scrambled to pick up the stuff that had slid down the corridor and handed them back to the girl.

"Thank you and I'm sorry." She said in a whisper. The blonde examined her sullen eyes, twitchy behaviour, and her desperate need to leave and came to the conclusion that something had just happened but no one was around.

"Are you okay? It's Emmeline, isn't it?" Eleanor asked with slight concern, she couldn't tell if the girl was saddened or angered and supposed it was a mixture of the two.

"Oh yeah, I am! And yes, your Ada's sister right?" Emma tried to convince her but they both knew that wasn't going to work.

"Yes, I am." The blonde replied quietly, making Emma regret how she worded that. _I could of just asked if her name was Eleanor,_ she internally groaned at her own stupidity. "I can tell something is bothering you though, if you don't want to tell me I get that but I hope you're alright and I always up to talking if you need it." She said, causing Emmeline to genuinely smile.

"Thank you. I've got to go but it was nice meeting you." Emma told her honestly, tucking her sketch book under her arm before departing. The girl heard a 'you too!' just before she rounded the corner. Both Eleanor and Isadora entered the library so the the blonde could help her study for her charms mock.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Sat in Defence Against the Dark Arts, she had noticed a number of things. One, Georgia had dyed her hair back to its original light brown and Violet had dyed her hair black, to be honest it really suited the girl. Two, Violet had no spoken a word to Sirius and seemed to be getting cosy with a few Slytherins. Three, Georgia was hardly around them now. Four, Caprice had a lot to say about the girl but Violet kept trying to defend her. Five, the cold glares from Jinky had returned. She hadn't said a word though. Eleanor wasn't the only one who had noticed them though, the boys had caught on very quickly to the woman's antics.

They were going over the spell, practicing the incantation, when she noticed a few eyes were trained on her. A small folded piece of parchment appeared in front of her and she unfolded the note.

_Meet me after the lesson. We need to talk._

Her eyes flickered back to the girl, who was currently sat with a few Slytherins and looked extremely uncomfortable, and Ellie nodded at her. She had never spoken to Georgia before and with her being friends with Violet she could only assume how important this was.  
  
  


When class ended, she hung back as her friends descended down the corridor. She rested her back as the others passed by, earning a glance or two from the Slytherins. All smirking smugly, just like they had on boxing day. A shiver ran down her spine, there was an attempted attack over Christmas, leaving the muggleborn hospitalised. Some aurors were close by and saved their life. There were no suspects, not yet at least.

The sound of shoes clicking alerted her and the girl waved for her to follow. Pushing off the wall, she did so. Trying to stay subtle so no one would suspect anything. In today's times, Eleanor never knew what the news would be.

One after the other, they entered a large bathroom that looked like it had been untouched for at least twenty years. It was pristine but covered in a layer of dust, thicker then the dust that gathered in an old library.

"Nobody uses these, we should be fine to talk here." Georgia said as she paced up and down, past the hexagon of sinks.

"Right. And what is it that we need to talk about?" She questioned the girl that hadn't uttered a single word to her before today.

"Violet." She paused, catching Eleanor's physique shift at the mention of the girls name. "I need your help. I don't know who else to turn to. You and your friends are the only ones that have ever stood up to her and those Slytherins. I just- There is no other option." She expressed, running a hand through her hair raggedly. Clearly in distress, Eleanor was intrigued. Sure, they didn't get a long and she had called her some names but there was always a hint of insecurity lurking. If it was anyone else, Violet would not be saved but this was Eleanor. She couldn't help it. After suffering for so long, there was an impulse to help others even when they had done her wrong.

"Okay. What's the problem?" The blonde asked, leaning on the sinks as she eyes the other girl cautiously. Georgia froze, in disbelief of how easy she had agreed to this. There was a weakness in her kindness. For even Lily Evans, the girl known for her pure heart, would be very hesitant to help Violet. If she was in a position where death was prominent, the redhead would help but there was a thin line between helping and being pulled down with them. That didn't matter to Eleanor. A little part of her wished a heroic ending to herself as any current alternative was seen as 'cold' and 'cowardly', even though death would be the only act where she chose herself first. Where she put her own happiness first.

"You know about her and Sirius, or what she was trying to make become 'her and Sirius'?" Georgia asked, making the girl frown lightly but she nodded. "That's not her."

"What do you mean?" Eleanor quizzed, slightly confused. She had known of the girl for about two months so there was a lot of blanks in her knowledge.

"Look. She doesn't like Sirius, she never has. They have been an on and off thing since fourth year." Georgia started, grabbing the blondes attention even if she was confused. "The Fletcher family is dying out, along with their blood purity. Her sister was kicked out over the summer and has now run off with a Scottish muggle. There is a lot of pressure for her to marry well. So, Violet's mother dictated that she started to take a liking to Black, to try and help them. Sirius' mother caught wind of this as she believed it could get her son back on track. Things went alright between them until he ran off to James' and he suddenly wasn't that interested. Then you came along. His mother doesn't care for the Fletcher family because it is no secret that she is obsessed with your family, she has hope that you can 'save him'." She explained, slowly causing El's heart to sink. It was why she tried not to judge people but Violet made it so hard not to. She knew the pain of having no choice all too well for her to do nothing. "Since that idea sprung to his mother's mind, Violet has been set some new people to go for. Mulciber, Avery, Yaxley, Crouch, Lestrange: any of them to pull back the family name to what it once was. And I'm scared for her. She is way out of her depths. I can't get close enough to her anymore. Violet is never alone with me, she sticks with Caprice most of the time who now has started sprouting her anti-muggleborn agenda in hopes of being picked by one of them too. I know you might not see it but Violet is not like that at all. If you met her in first year, she was totally different. She was incredibly smart, always had her nose in a book or raising her hands to ask questions, she didn't care about what any body thought of her until third year when her parents began to meddle with her thoughts. Violet is the only friend I have left..." She sighed, looking down at the floor as she thought about their years at school together.

"How am I supposed to help? She isn't exactly my biggest fan, even if she is going after another boy. I doubt I could talk to her alone." Ellie expressed and she was right. It was going to be extremely difficult but not totally impossible.

"Your a pureblood. Avery seems to talk to you a lot. If you can't get her to talk then go to her, she sits at the clock tower just before curfew. I know this is a lot but maybe you can get through to her. Everyone acts differently around you but in a good way, this could be the thing she needs to set free. I better get going though, I'll write to you to keep this on the low. Something is happening at Hogwarts, we aren't going to survive if we don't help each other." Georgia finished, taking one last deep breath before exiting the bathroom. The blonde stood still, weighing out her options. It wouldn't be her first 'run away from home' talk, ten more and she could call herself a professional. _That's not how it works,_ she thought before a cracking sound caught her attention. Carefully drawing her wand, she was met by a transparent blue frowning school girl hovering in front of her.

"Florence?" The ghost asked in a high pitched voice that could have cut straight through her, like nails on a chalkboard.

"N-no. I'm Eleanor but my mother was called Florence." She told the girl and her face softened momentarily.

"Well, what are you doing in here?" She questioned, in quite a hostile manner. Not many people dared to enter, especially not older students.

"I was thinking but now I'm talking to you." She shot back but her smile was just as hypnotic as both her mother's and her aunties. The ghost had known the latter quite well before her death and her aunt's demise. It was strange to see the very sting similarities. Even as a ghost, Aurora used to frequently visit Myrtle but it was mostly to come and cry over a certain boy. One thing that the women of their family knew what to do was how to break a heart, typically their own.   
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


For the first week back, tensions had been through the roof. The separation between houses was as clear as ever, not like that stopped Eleanor. There was huddled whispers, new rumours flying around school, and overall everything was chaotic. This was the first big attack that had happened and everyone was shaken up.  
  
Sirius Black had not been in a good mood and everyone knew that. Unfortunately, if you were not liked by the boy, you would have received a hex as the group dissolved into their childish ways. There was multiple rumours being sprouted about the boy but Eleanor discovered that he had a major dispute with his brother the day after they returned to Hogwarts. On what they argued about, she didn't know. Three days later, nearly half of Slytherin house had to go to the hospital wing at some point to get a reverse spell. Eleanor did get to see Mulciber with an inflamed head so she would save the lecture for when he wouldn't give her a set of horns.

When she came across a gathering of students, her gut feeling told her that whatever was happening was not good. Not in these circumstances. They had blocked off the corridor, just outside the potions classrooms, after class. The girl had stayed back to finish their potion with Dorcas, they both stopped upon discovering the scene. Their arms unlinked instantly at the uproar of cheers and gasps from surrounding students. She grabbed Dorcas' hand as she pushed through the group of students, earning scoffs and remarks in return. Not like that mattered to her.

As she stumbled to the front, she came across who she expected to be there. For once, she didn't like being right. On each side, there was clear aggression. Instead of having wands drawn, blood was splatted across faces, knuckles, and the cobbled floor. Everyone as angry as the next. Lily had her arm drawn in front of Marlene keeping her still, along with them was Mary who had her wand out ready. Violet, Caprice, Avery, Mulciber, and Snape had bloodied faces. Both Avery and Caprice seemed to have had it the worst this time; Mulciber was not in a hurry to go back to the hospital wing. On the right was Sirius, who was currently been held back by three very furious marauders. There was something different with him, unlike the other three, he looked murderous and was the one who had beat Avery's face in. There was so much blood on the blond's face that she was barely recognisable.

A silence had washed over the crowd when Eleanor appeared. Her friends didn't notice her but the group of Slytherins did. She didn't care though. Eyes scanning over them, she found Regulus who eyes were flashing with sorrow. There was one thing that everyone knew about the Black family and it was that they knew how to hide their emotions. Seeing him like that signified how bad this was or how bad it was going to get. 

"Look who it is." Yaxley scoffed, being the first to notice her. He stepped forward carefully, followed by Crouch and Wilkes. They looked far to smug for a side that had just been beaten up. Hatred radiated off of her friends that only intensified with each step.

"Eleanor." The redhead warned as El went to step closer to him, causing Dorcas to squeeze her hand in an attempt to get her to stop. Of course, she didn't listen. Nobody intimidated the blonde more then herself and that was one of the scariest and most harmful things about the girl.

All of a sudden, she froze. Directly across from her, huddled behind a sobbing Violet was who she feared to see there the most. Adelaide. A stone cold face. Stiff posture. Hands resting in front of her. The perfect girl for their perfect father in the perfect house with the perfect ideals. She knew that her sister had never been on for the fight for equality in both the muggle and wizarding world but now she had taken a stance. And everyone around her saw the shatters of her heart crumble into dust. The look on her face had even stopped the three boys from approaching her. Eleanor stared at her sister who was comforting Caprice, someone had openly stood against who she was, and Adelaide's eyes bore into Lily. The redhead was family, their parents had been there for her when Florence wasn't but Ada was always so quick to forget that part. None of this mattered. She could find out what had happened to the others later. Her mind only trained on her sister though. 

"Don't touch her!" Marlene yelled aggressively, both Lily and Marlene tried to push their way through the barricade that Crouch and Wilkes had formed. Some other Slytherins had taken the other side to keep the boys from passing through. Loud shouts from all sides clogged her hearing as she finally retracted her eyes, realising Yaxley was holding up her chin to him as he observed her face.

"Such wasted potential. Voldemort would have loved you. A shame, really." He said as his smirk grew, his voice was low. Only her friends and the Slytherins could hear him now. "Blood traitor." Yaxley spat before slapping her cheek harshly, his ring cutting into her skin. An uproar sparked from the contact, a brawl pursuing to try and stop him. As she looked up at him from where her hand covered her cheeks, she looked so meagre. There was one rule in the Westbrook household that Eleanor lived up to each time; never back down, especially when your integrity is at stake. Ada knew her sister so well that it was no wonder that she tried to escape before things got messy.

"And do you want to know what you are?" Eleanor asked, stepping up to him once more. He did not like that at all. Though, he tried his hardest not to show his tremble and just hummed at her to continued. "A coward." She replied quietly but her tone was spoken with such an impact, making his anger slowly simmer. "Your scared of losing the only thing that makes you special. Your scared of losing for the greater good. Your scared of everyone seeing you as what you are, ordinary with no real talent. And most of all your scared of power. You take the easiest option. Instead of creating your own power, you steal it from others. A temporary fix to get you at the top for maybe a year or two. All of you are too weak to create your own destiny, you blindly follow someones delusions to try and take from those who have worked for it." Ellie criticised, taking a step forward with each sentence. Yaxley was now backed into his friends with no where to go. She took in his speechless state and smirked. "Such wasted potential." She mocked, glaring into his soul. The boy was one of Voldemort's most feared followers and he was quaking at a few words. Staring at the girl as if her eyes had turned black, he looked fearful of his life. Eleanor eyes flashed to Ada who had finally looked at her. Every emotion of betrayal crashing back to her in seconds, it was like a tsunami. "How could you?" Eleanor said in a shaky voice but the sister stayed stone cold as if they had only just met that day. With that, Eleanor pushed through the groups and ran up the stairs. Mass amounts of teachers were heading that way to break up the fuss, not knowing what had happened. Eleanor just wanted to be alone. She headed straight to Myrtle's bathroom.

Throwing her books across the room in a flash of rage, she truly never knew how to express what she was feeling. The mirrors were not helping as she inspected the light cut, thankfully it wouldn't scar but that was the last thing on her mind. She took a few steps back and collided into the wall, sinking down to the floor as tears began to spill. Myrtle had appeared to check the commotion. She was about to scold whoever it was when she paused. This scene had become so familiar to her a long time ago. A Knightley used to barge in their all the time, sit in that exact spot and ball her eyes out. Sure they were blessed with good looks but they were cursed with misfortune. If Eleanor wasn't blonde, in that moment, she would have looked so much like Aurora. The girl who loved to easily and paid the ultimate price. A soul so pure ripped away to become one of the most volatile creations known to wizard kind. That was the thing. Kindness too often overlapped with being naive, something Eleanor, Florence, and Aurora definitely were. The Knightley bloodline were guided by the heart and soul, not the brain. One wouldn't know if their lover manipulated them until it was too late. It was likely that Eleanor would have the same fate.


	17. the match from hell

  
**_chapter seventeen_ **

「 _the match from hell_ 」

♱

_Worse than a bloody hand is a hard heart._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _AFTER THAT INCIDENT,_** the girl didn't exactly feel like returning to her friends. She very much preferred to be alone in such a state. But curfew neared and the last thing she wanted was a detention. The halls were silent as she wandered through the castle. Instead of being peaceful, it was eerie. A shiver ran across her skin as she pulled her blazer tightly around her, she had left her cloak back in the common room. The exposed skin on her thighs were frozen and if she stood still, she would shiver. Everything felt odd.

The fat lady glared her down as she whispered the password. Her head fell, staring at the floor as she walked in. In the background, the fire cracked lowly as it simmered into ashes. A lone figure sat on the sofa, staring straight at the bland wall. Knuckles were covered in dry blood and there was a splatter of red on his once pristine shirt. His shirt sleeves where rolled as one arm rested on his leg and the other was the arm of the chair, propping his head up. Looking towards him, she paused on the spot. The blonde was quite dizzy after none stop crying. Her eyes were red raw and her nose was stuffy.

"Where is everyone?" Eleanor asked, barely audible. His head turned to her, there was a brief pause as he tried to register what she had just said.

"Mary and Lily took Marlene to the hospital wing, they haven't returned. The boys are upstairs." He told her plainly, eyes flickering back to his spot on his wall. Ellie blinked, standing there guiltily as if she was at fault for all of this. At home, bluntness and silence equalled that you were not in the good books.

"Your not mad at me, are you?" The girl quizzed with a tremble to her voice. He immediately frowned at her words before he turned his head back to face her, only now taking in her timid stance. A brow raised, he scanned her sunken head as she stared at the nails that she was picking at. There was only one other time he had seen her like that and it was when she was -practically- being verbally abused by Annabeth.

"Why would I be?" Sirius questioned back, his body now turning towards her as she slightly relaxed.

"I- Well." Her brain was rushing with thoughts that would sound ridiculous out loud. "It doesn't matter." She breathed, not wanting to sound weak because she usually felt that way. There was a pause as they watched each other. Her leg shook lightly from the breeze, causing her to take a step back. "You should probably wrap your knuckles so they heal properly." Eleanor commented, looking back to his hands. "I can do it, if you want." She added.

"If you don't mind." He replied and a small smile appeared on her lips. The fire causing a flush to coat her cheeks in the dancing golden glow.

"Meet me upstairs then." She said, knowing that he couldn't get up the stairs. With a nod, she departed to her dorm. Throwing off her blazer, she replaced it with the original hoodie that he gave her as she gave the other one back before she left the Potter's house. As she headed into the bathroom to collect supplies, she heard the hatch go, informing her that he had arrived. Luckily, Alice had her nightly patrols so they weren't bothering anyone. A cloth, a bowl of warm water, and some bandages was all she needed, thanks to Lily being prepared for every situation they had all the supplies. Exiting the room, she caught him looking at the pictures her wall. The one of the two of them, in particular. It was from just over a year ago at Schivon manor, just before fifth year. Both of them were laughing in the picture as the prank on one of the purists had worked.

"I didn't know you picked this up." He said, turning back to her as she placed the bowl of warm water on her night stand. The girl stood by him and looked at the multitude of memories.

"The photographer gave it to me before I left." Eleanor explained, pulling out a chair for herself. "Sit." She instructed as she sat down, dipping the cloth in the water before ringing it out so it was damp. "Hand." El said, holding up her left hand to hold it still. "This might sting." She told him because she had added a bit of rubbing alcohol to the mixture. Holding his hand, she gently dabbed at the dried up blood as they sat in the quiet of the night. He didn't flinch nor did he complain once. Their eyes met as she took his other hand. "What happened then?" Eleanor questioned in a soft tone as she looked away first. She noticed how he froze and his fist clenched.

"They started on Lily but that was only an argument and then-" He stopped talking and El looked up at him. The boy had averted his eyes as he tried to think of what to say.

"Go on." Eleanor said, dipping the cloth back in the water to cleanse some of the blood off.

"Well, Caprice brought you up and Marlene lost it. Battered her face in." He began to explain, a smile growing on his face from the memory. "You've got good friends." Sirius said but Eleanor's stomach dropped a little, knowing that there was more than friendship on the line. It made her recoil from the boy, a sense of guilt flooding over her.

"And how did you end up like this?" She pushed but the boy said nothing. One could only assume what would happen and she had a strong sense that it was to do with her. In tale, over the next few weeks multiple rumours was about to spurt out about the girl. This wouldn't be the first time nor the last. She picked up the bandages and with a flick of her wand, they were wrapped up tightly. "All done." The girl announced but she never moved as the were consumed by the silence once more. Her blonde hair had fallen in front of her eyes as they were still leaned in close...

Suddenly, he raised his hand to her face as he pushed the blonde strands away. His thumb grazed across the dried up cut on her cheek bone. Her heart began to race as her thoughts became conflicted. It felt so right and she felt so safe but a part of her knew how wrong this was, just over a week ago she had kissed someone else. In this situation, being selfish felt so intoxicating like it was what was supposed to be. But her mind kept flashing back to Marlene; she couldn't deny the feelings that she had for her but this was different. Whatever this was, it was nothing like she felt with anybody else. How could she? The only options was going to end with a broken heart and every time it would be hers...

She could have kissed him. The space between them was barely there. Their stares going from eye to lips, from lips to eyes, from eyes to lips. His breathe was smelling of mint and cigarettes, a weird mixture that he made work. Everything about him pulled her in. But she couldn't.

Sliding out of her seat, she grabbed the bowl and headed into the bathroom. She tipped out the water and placed the bowl on the side, staring into the mirror. A shaky breath escaped her lips as she closed her eyes momentarily. The snapping of the hatch alerted her, she slowly walked out into the empty room and sat on her bed. It was unusually lumpy. Pulling back the covers, she grabbed the book that was tucked under the cover. A note was attached.

_Merry Christmas, my dear._   
_This was my biggest fear,_   
_somebody trying to hide the truth._   
_I am sorry that you'll never get to live your youth._   
_\- O_

She froze. Another riddle with rhymes but with a new letter. Strange. In her hand was a copy of beautiful mystery. She didn't know if she wanted to know or not. Something within didn't want to know the truth, like it would change everything. The likeliness of that was slim to none. Something sprung to mind. She reminisced the conversation with Jinky: 'A filthy halfbreed, just like your mother.' What was her father hiding.

The book was no longer empty but now included the full four pages. She placed it on her nightstand, wanting to face it tomorrow instead. Remus could help her. He was very knowledgeable with his mythology and his creatures. Plus, he could keep a secret. Out of all of them, he would understand. Scribbling down a note, she asked him to meet her after lesson tomorrow at their dorm and with a flick of her wand the note was delivered to the boy.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


For the past few days, Regulus had been quite persistent in a strive to talk to her. Thankfully, Eleanor had been there every time to save the day. The two had been working together, trying to discover what the Slytherins were planning. Today, they were sat in Myrtles bathroom, trying to figure out if the chocolate had been laced. It was a starting point to figure them out. They had gathered around the bubbling cauldron with the random appearance of Myrtle, she often critiqued how they shouldn't be doing such a thing and should hand in the item. Neither of them listened though.

Casting a spell, she with drew that potion that tainted the colour and put it in a vile. It was a dark yellow shade and had a dangerously beautiful smell. Eleanor had predicted that the potion was Chelidonium Miniscula. This potion was known to delude the drinker, putting them in a hallucinogenic state. They would still move and function but they had no control of themselves, the drinker would be trapped in their own brain. It was a very rare potion as it was extremely difficult to master such a potion, only three people throughout history had been able to brew this correctly. Whoever did this had some serious skills. A name came to mind.

"Be careful of what your eating and drinking. I will sort this. Try and stay with one person at all times, if not done accurately then this could have killed you." Eleanor explained to the girl who seemed drastically overwhelmed. The blonde could understand why though. She walked Isadora back to her lesson before departing to her last lesson of the day. Her stomach squirming the whole way there. None of them were ready.  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Knocking on the hatch, she had slipped away to the girls dorm to get changed and collect the book. All day, the weather had been murky as they expected another storm. The girl had been begging all day that it wouldn't arrive but she knew that it was going to be here anytime soon. She needed to be as swift as possible. On top of all this information, she didn't need Remus worrying about her. His mind was already plagued with his lyncathrope and Delilah's sickness that had started to brew a day or two ago. The boy unlocked the wooden hatch and she dropped in. She had chosen to wear her jeans for a reason.

"Where are the others and when will they be back?" Was her first words to him, catching him off guard with the hostility. He frowned lightly as he re-closed the hatch.

"They're at Quidditch practise for the upcoming match, they'll be back in about an hour. Why?" He asked, quite concerned at her almost frantic behaviour. With that she let out a sigh of relief and sat on his bed, opposite him. Her back was against the wooden post whilst his was against his head board.

"I didn't want to do this because I know you have a lot on your plate. But I didn't know who to go to and I don't even know if what i'm going to show you is true..." Eleanor explained in a very fast pace, only confusing him more.

"Slow down." He said, moving closer to grab her hand to calm her down. "You've helped me more in -how long have we known each other?- three months then my parents have in the last twelve years. I have room to help you, no matter what." Remus explained, making her smile lightly as she sucked in a deep breath.

"You know, a few months ago after we pulled that prank on Jinky and she pulled my away." The girl started and he nodded, with the moon a week or so away he was trying to not get worked up. "She called my a 'filthy halfbreed' and that's when a note came."

"El-" Remus tried, knowing that she had failed to mention this to any of them. She let out a small sigh, knowing how vulnerable she was being and she hated it. But Remus could be trusted. 

"I know. At the time, I didn't think much of it until I got a note. It told me of a book that could reveal my 'truth'. And it was in the restricted section and most of the pages had been ripped out." She explained, causing the boy's mind to race at possible explanation of this and what was happening. "Yesterday, I was sent this book with another book. A full one with nothing scribbled or torn out. I haven't read it yet. I know your very knowledgeable about creatures and mythology so you might be able to figure this all out. Plus I was too scared to read it all." Eleanor told him, handing the book over to him when the rain began to pour. She jumped up, shocking him. The grey clouds charging forward followed by a little rumble. Her eyes went wide, she thought she'd have more time. She had startled Remus with her sudden movements as his eyes filled with complete worry. "The storm. I have to go." The girl said simply, racing towards the hatch and unlocking it. "Please just read, I'll see you later." El spoke in a panic, pushing herself out the room as she felt herself becoming increasingly weaker.

"Wait, El!" He called popping his head out as she disappeared into her room, a pain shooting up and down her right side. Collapsing onto her bed, she curled up into a ball, ready to pass out once more.

Across from there, the boy stared at the raging atmosphere. The rain heavy, thunder clapping loudly above, and the lightening flashing boldly through the darkening sky. Then he dipped his head down, deciding to read that book. Tomorrow he'd ask her about it.

_Throughout my years of research, I have never found such a fascinating species as this. From the depths of Atlantic ocean to the forbidden forest, they populate in every region of this world. Yet, no one has a clue who they truly are, until now._

_Some of the most beautiful people, inside and out, are the Antheians. A mythological creature from ancient Greek. No one has believed in their existence for centuries as they were erased from history. Today, I will finally expose the truth with Olive Hornsby - the discoverer of this community that blends among us._

_There has been no record of them, only starting to pop up in the British wizarding community, forty years ago. What do I know about them? They are divine beauty, someone of the most attractive to grace this Earth. They are the protectors of this world, of the people and nature. They have seen to be powerless on their own but in recent years they have branched their genes into other worlds and are now unstoppable._

_You will never find someone kinder and more generous than an Antheian. As a reward for being the protector for all, they were granted with eternal beauty and youth from those above. They are rumoured to be the product of Antheia, who was one of the Charites, or Graces, of Greek mythology and was the goddess of flowers and flowery wreaths. Hence the name, Antheian._

_From my studies, I have noticed certain behavioural patterns that correspond with other groups. A mix of a nymph, siren, witch, werewolf and vampire to form the perfect protectors of nature._

_The nymph comes into play with their powerful connection with nature, different types of Antheians work with each element better depending where they're from._

_The Siren is associated through the fact that everything about them is hypnotic, men and women fall at their feet. They're so elusive and intoxicating, it is easy for people to become obsessed with them or -in most cases- fall in love and the Antheian cannot help it._   
_Most of them can hold their breath for a long time under the water and they are calmed when it touches their skin. Plus, they look most appealing in water, more so then normal if that is even possible!_

_The Witch traits are as followed: all Antheians have magical blood and are invited to wizarding schools, however, they are not the best at magic unless one of their parents are a wizard. If they choose to attend a wizarding school, their best subjects tend to be Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures - or any equivalent to those subjects globally._

_The Vampire aspects are far trickier and will be discussed later on, for one to become a true Antheian, they must drink the blood of one. If their heart and soul are not pure enough, they will be poisoned._

_Finally, there's their Werewolf-like tendencies. Instead of the moon they are affected and controlled by the storm. It was a curse placed upon them many centuries ago by an infuriatingly jealous witch. They suffer immense pain, as if their limbs are being ripped to shreds. Often blacking out to deal with such a torture. No such cute has been found to help their conditions._   
  
  


Remus immediately snapped the book shut and hid it under his pillow at the scuffling of footsteps outside their dorm. He quickly grabbed his journal and pretended to be writing so he wasn't suspicious. The other three marauders had trekked in, completely drenched from the rain. Unsure with what they were talking about, he had decided to go check on Eleanor with this new found information. If this was all true, he was extremely worried of what she may be going through right now.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


By the time she had woken up, the storm had completely vanished but the day was still murky. Lily was staying with Delilah, to make sure she was okay, Mary was with Marlene, unfortunately the girl had caught a severe case of the flu while visiting the hospital wing leaving her bed bound so the girls formed a rota to stay with her, and Alice was with Frank. So, when she was all tucked up in her bed instead of being a crumpled mess on the floor. When she saw the mop of sandy blonde hair, she understood as she lightly shook him awake. Remus had fallen asleep, resting his back on her bed, on the floor and had been their all night to make sure she was okay.

"Huh? Oh, good morning. How are you feeling?" He asked, rubbing his eyes before proceeding to crack his back. She grimaced at the noise before a small smile returned to her lips.

"I could ask you the same. Sleeping like that is not good for your posture." Eleanor told him, causing him to laugh lightly. Her face was sunken and the circles under her eyes were dark, the night had been a long one and she was feeling terribly exhausted.

"The storm. Why didn't you tell on of us?" He asked, watching as her brain worked at 100 miles a minute.

"How did you know?" Eleanor returned, not everything coming to her in these early hours of the morning - even though it was eleven o'clock.

"The book you gave me, it said about the storms and I came to check on you and I guess that it's true." The boy explained and her mood instantly changed. If this was true, then everything fell into place. Her father was a purist. It would explain her mother's random death, why she was always outcasted by her father but then Adelaide would be too. So, none of it did make sense. To be honest, she had hoped that it wasn't true. The blonde stuck out against the crowd all too often and didn't want anything else to make her 'special'.

"But I don't want it to be." She whispered back and he knew exactly what she meant. Even coming to terms with his lycanthrope due to the help of the boys, everyday he wished that he was without it and was somebody else. There was now a mutual understanding.

"I didn't get past the second page, i'll have to finish it later because the quidditch match is on today." Remus added after their moment of shared silence. She had totally forgotten about that. Quidditch wasn't something that she enjoyed but a few of her friends were playing and the others were obsessed with the sport, like Remus.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  


Heading down to the pitch with Remus, she had painted two red and yellow stripes on his cheeks whilst she had opted to wear the Gryffindor scarf. They were supposed to meet the others there as Peter had apparently got them the best seats. Lily had gotten Delilah to come since she had made a swift recovery. Marlene was getting let out today and they were all going there after the match to take her back to the dorm.

It was a lively atmosphere and Eleanor wasn't sure if she liked it or not. That didn't matter though because she was there to cheer on her friends! They climbed over a few people before they reached the rest of the group. She muttered a few hellos before taking the spare seat beside Peter, who's face instantly lit up.

"Finally. Your here. The match has just started, so good timing. I can't believe you've never been to a quidditch match before!" He exclaimed over the roaring crowd, pulling the girl into a quick side hug that she returned. 

She wasn't sure what was happening but she cheered when the others did and that seemed to be suffice enough. What she knew wasn't right was when Mulciber took the bat and hurtled the bludger at Mary, barely skimming past her.

"That's preposterous! He could have killed her!" Lily called as she watched Mary dove to escape the impact of the bludger. There was screams of protests but Professor Hornsby ignored them as he had a very partial favouritism to the Slytherins. 

Then things got increasingly worse at an increasingly swift pace. Mulciber was out for revenge and told Rabastan to aim at a certain three that were all there when his face was beat in. That was quite prevalent by the way he sent the bludger rippling Sirius' way, there was much more to this story then what Eleanor was aware of. Luckily, the beaters on the gryffindor team were quite in tune with how the Slytherin's were playing and were able to save both James and the fourth year seeker. Even Dorcas, a massive Slytherin team supporter, was annoyed by their antics but that may be to do with her new found friends being targeted. She had bonded with Mary the most, except for Eleanor and Marlene, so it was likely that she was fearsome for her. But Mary was strong, she had taken a good few tumbles and hits over her years on the team. This wasn't the first time that someone was aiming for her and she sure knew that it wouldn't be the last. She was glad that she was a beater as she could defend herself and she was worried less when a leather covered iron ball came charging her way. 

It only took a few more minutes for things to escalate and Rowan Evergreen, the Slytherin keeper, was plummeting to the floor as the bludger smacked him off of his broom. They were not happy at all. All six of the remain team worked together: shoving, pulling, smacking until one of Gryffindors chasers had been tasselled into the banners on the stand. Following that, James was smacked in the face which broke his glasses, rendering him useless but he wouldn't give up. Upon impact, Lily had shot with a horrified face to check if he was okay and only recoiled when Jack had turned to look at her. Delilah seemed completely out of it, probably daydreaming like usual.

Teachers were trying to call off the match by the time seven students were left in the air, yet Hornsby continued to decline such an action as Regulus was currently tailing the snitch. The others continued as best as they could, with their seeker down they had to score three more times to secure a win if the opposition caught the snitch. That was going to be unlikely though. Mary had taken charge with the other chaser, tumbling down the pitch together whilst Sirius kept the bludgers away.

"Another ten points for Gryffindor!" Thomas called, who was spectating the match from his own booth. Nobody cheered though, everyone was to nervous of what may happen next. McGonagall looked about ten seconds away from wrestling the professor to the ground because of his sheer stupidity to let them continue. "Regulus Black has caught the snitch!" That seemed to be enough to distract the players as both bludgers came crashing into the three remaining Gryffindors. 

Eleanor was the first to notice as she bolted up, startling her friends until the caught on. All though he was injured, Sirius was quick thinking and cast a spell to stop them from splatting against the grass; potentially saving them from a brain injury or two. Lily was the first to move when the whistle was finally blown, her motherly instincts going into overdrive as she pushed through the group, followed by the rest of them. The blonde made sure to stay with Delilah, just in case. She was looking a bit peeky and her head was in the clouds. 

By the time that they had gotten out of the stands, they were chasing after the people that were carrying the injured on stretchers, heading to the hospital wing. Upon rounding the corner, they were greeted by McGonagall who instantly stopped them in their tracks. Only a few of them could enter and everyone else had to come back. That only caused a further fuss amongst the group and their head of house ultimately made them sit against the wall in silence. None of them could enter, not until Madame Pomfrey had a chance to check each player over. The group of teens sat in silence, moody expressions on their faces, muttering 'this is your fault' to each other as they all refused to leave. 


	18. not so innocent

  
  
**_chapter eighteen_ **

「 _not so innocent_ 」

♱

_We reveal most about ourselves when we speak about others._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 ** _T_** _ **W:**_ Anorexia/Bulimia/mentions of attempted suicide  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 ** _  
_**

 _**SINCE MARLENE WASN'T** _quite ready to leave yet, she decided to see how Sirius was when she was allowed to enter. Most of the girls were huddled around Mary, the blonde had decided to come back later to see her though as she didn't want to be in the way. James was patched up pretty quickly and had exited the wing with Remus and Peter to get some dinner before they would return to sit with their friend. She received a glare or two from the Slytherins opposite but she didn't really care, it was nothing new. Slipping through the curtain, he was just staring out the window at the greyish day. 

"How are you feeling?" Eleanor asked, walking up the his bedside. Madame Pomfrey had only just given him his first drink to fix his shattered rib cage. The girl knew the feeling of repairing bones, she had one to many visits to the ward in Beauxbatons. It was like a dull ache with a shooting pain every so often. 

"Not bad. Those Slytherins definitely have it worse." He said, smirking at the cry of pain coming from across the room. Shaking her head lightly, she couldn't help but laugh lightly as she took a seat on the edge of his bed. She pulled on her jumper, making the front baggy so it wouldn't reveal what was underneath. "That was the first quidditch match you've been to, right?"

"Yes and it was most entertaining." She responded, causing him to smile widely. It hurt to much to laugh, he had already tried too. "This really isn't your year, is it? We're not even two weeks in and you've been injured twice." Ellie reminded him, though he'd technically been wounded more then that if we counted emotional and mental aspects. It had all transpired from a small argument and continued to escalate. 

"I guess not." Sirius stated, almost sadly. She hadn't expected such a reply and didn't know what to say. They sat in the quiet, well the background noise wasn't so quiet. "About the other day-" He began and Eleanor swore she choked on the air in her throat. She wasn't sure if she could do this, not now, not here. "Why d-"

"Ellie?" Marlene called from the other side of the curtain. "Are you ready to go?" She questioned as El had agreed to walk her and Delilah back to the dorm. Instantly standing up, the girl looked towards him with a guilty expression but it was the perfect excuse. That way she didn't have to discuss the one thing she hated: emotions.

"Sorry. I'll be back later and we can continue this. I just promised them." She explained and he nodded understandingly. Glancing him over, she couldn't get a read on his body language. Damn him and his ability to hide his emotions, it made situations like this rather difficult. With a deep breath, she left. Being greeted by a shivering Delilah and a pale Marlene. "Come on. Lets get you both to bed."

♱

"Delilah." The girl said when Marlene had headed into the bathroom. Humming in response, Eleanor continued. "You would tell me if something was wrong... Wouldn't you?"

"Of courseI would, when haven't I?" She replied, getting under her covers. A warm smile hiding her frozen exterior. She was severely cold and her figure had drastically changed since September. Delilah had never been considered 'plus size' or 'skinny', she was curvy -especially her bottom half- which meant that she also had a bit of a stomach but she had lost that definition. Her thighs no longer touched and her hips were as wide as her waist.

"Okay. Well, Isadora will be back any second. I asked her to pick up some dinner for the both of you." Eleanor explained to her, cleaning away some of the stuff lying around for them. She made her way over to Delilah's trunk and pulled out her fluffy blanket to add on top of her. Even under the covers, she was very visibly shaking. 

"Thank you but I'm not really hungry." Delilah said as El placed the blanket over her, bundling her up like a baby. Sucking in a small breathe, the blonde spoke.

"And that's the problem. I'm not oblivious, Lilah. I know what you've been doing." Ellie stated, sitting by her side with a concerned look on her face.

"I don't know what you mean." Was her only answer as she turned to face the wall, the blonde had only been guessing but now she was more positive then before.

"When was the last time you ate, properly." Eleanor said and a silence washed over them. Out of all of them, Eleanor had constantly struggled with food since the age of twelve. Not like any of these knew but she would never let what happened to her, happen to Delilah. Thankfully, Celine and her friends back in France had found out about her constant throwing up and were the reason she had got back on track. Annabeth was the one who taught her how to, even offered to shove her fingers down her throat the first time. It came from an article in some tabloid that had mocked her figure, calling her some treacherous names just for being chubby. It was baby weight, El was only a child. Once she got out the viscous cycle, it always ended up coming back. It was scary to think how close she had been to starting again before the dance. An orb came from Celine, stopping her from the memories of last time. Although Eleanor believed she was being strong, she just resorted to her other methods.

"New Years." She answered in a shaky whisper, a single tear slipping down her face. Eleanor immediately placed a hand on her arm, comfortingly. "I-I don't mean too. I'm just not hungry and then when I do, I feel sick. Like it hurts after I've eaten."

"I know. It's not your fault okay. Everything can be done in baby steps. This is why you've been ill, your body is completely malnourished." The blond told her and she just nodded in agreement, pulling the blankets tighter around her frame.

"I thought I would like it. I could look like you. But it is so much worse and I just want to keep going..." She stuttered out, those few words being the pang to the heart. There was a reason that Eleanor hadn't taken any modelling jobs since the summer, she constantly felt like she was lying. This wasn't truly her, it was an overworked and underfed body that she advertised to the millions. It didn't feel right. Look at what she had done to her best friend. She felt utterly nauseated at the thought alone.

"You don't want to Delilah. Trust me when I say that this is more damage then anything else. Your the most beautiful girl I know, everyone loves you because you are just that: you." She told her, making Delilah smile momentarily. It was true but the girl didn't see it or refused to see it that way. What had really triggered her was when she saw Remus and Eleanor together, only get worse over the last few months. She was intimidated, even though she knew that they'd never be anything more then friends. Her head told her different. In her mind, every boy looked at Eleanor as the girl that they wanted to be with but, in reality, they only seen her as some sort of prize or someone they'd love to fuck. If only Delilah noticed the way everyone look at her, how Remus looked at her. In truth, everyone wanted to be her and not Eleanor, especially when they knew the Westbrook. 

♱

After Isadora had returned, she had sat with Delilah and at with her so she felt comfortable. Both the other girls also joined them until it was time for them to rest. It was currently about seven o'clock when she left the Hufflepuff dorm and she had been there longer then expected. With Lily's rapidly approaching birthday, they had started to think of something to do that would be a shower stopper from her coming of age. They had the perfect idea but needed some help to execute the plan. Though she had gotten Delilah to eat a whole sandwich over the space of an hour, so she was feeling a little bit pleased. They had a lot to work through though. She knew that she would only eat when reminded. The girl had began to formulate a plan as she walked down the, mainly, empty hallways. 

"I told him, you know." A voice stopped her in her tracks, knowing exactly who it was. She could sense the entitlement from the other side of the grounds. And when she turned on her heel, she was greeted by Avery. Just as expected.

"Told who, what?" She asked, crossing her arm over her chest but deep down she knew exactly what he might be on about. That was enough for her heart to pick up its pace. Her poker face was strong though.

"Sirius. About me and you, of course." He said, leaning against the wall with that smug expression. It really wasn't hard to understand why he got punched the other day.

"There never has been such a thing as 'me and you' and they never will be. But it I am flattered that I live in your dreams." She replied sharply as he let out an amused chuckle before flashing his brows in disbelief of her stubbornness. 

"As much as you love to deny that night, it was truly worth the punch to see their reaction. How their opinion of you changed so quickly. They denied the claims as swiftly as they left my name. It is interesting how innocent they see you. Even that Mudblood." He said as her jaw clenched slightly. That boy really did have a punch-able face and every moment of this conversation could attest to that. 

"Watch you words, Avery." Eleanor said, glaring him down.

"Sorry, force of habit." The boy replied, insincerely. "I just thought that Lily, someone that had seen you almost overdose on some shit you recklessly snorted, would have believed my words but she was the most defensive. Funny, don't you think." 

"How do you know that?" She questioned weakly, her words trembling. Not many people knew about that, no one that would tell him anyway.

"Adelaide has been more then helpful." Avery admitted, smirking at her faltering expression. She felt physically sick. Her own sister had betrayed her secrets...

"Why did you tell him?" She asked simply.

"You ask a lot of questions, darling. I suppose, just to get a rise out of them. Their perfect princess not so innocent. Maybe people will finally see you for what you truly are." He sneered at her, she could no longer maintained eye contact. Now she regretted everything. One drunken mistake. Truth be told, her friends knew that Avery had been telling the truth but hadn't cared, not really. If you knew Eleanor's weakness, it was easy to get to her and he very much was. 

"There's no reason for you to say anything. It was a mistake and I was a mess. Don't flatter yourself." She shot back, trying to appear strong but it was no use.

"Oh but there is. You can't keep that pretty mouth of yours shut. Meddling with stuff that isn't your problem. One little slip up from you that tarnishes your reputation and your gone. No longer a threat to mine or the boys' families." He explained, pushing off the wall and stepping towards her. That, he was right about. Her stability in that family was thinner then ice, she was just a trophy at this point. And now that Adelaide had turned against her, there was nothing to defend her. The back of his fingers ghosted over the cut that had scabbed over on her cheek. "I mean, unless you joined us like your sister. Otherwise we have no choice." Avery told her in a whisper that sen chills over her whole body. 

"I never will." Eleanor spat, stepping away from his hold. "I hope you enjoy the memories of that night. You'll never find anyone better." She drawled. It was true, he never would. In every aspect, Eleanor Westbrook was unmatched. Purely unforgettable. The enigma that no one could forget, even if she was admired from a distance. 

"Maybe not. Lets be honest, Westbrook, you'll never forget that night either." He said. When she only glared at him in response, he took that as a sign of agreement. She never meant for it to happen. It was at the worst of her mental health, turning to anything to keep her distracted. She didn't know how she ended up like that. In that small closet. His lips trailing across her skin. Her hands trailing across his bare chest. His breathless state. Her head pumped full of a few endorphins to get her through the night. She shouldn't have fucked him but she was alone and desperate. That was the thing though, she never thought that she'd see him again. Just like Sirius. Now it was coming back to bite her.

"Tell them what you want. I don't care." Eleanor stated, taking a few steps back before departing. But she very much did. It only a few gossips to catch the news. If he had told Sirius, she expected those at the fight to be in the process of spreading said information. It was no wonder that some people had been whispering about her, in front of her face...

♱

To say she hated gossiping was an understatement, Mary loathed it. Particularly the people who participated in rumour spreading. It most likely stemmed from her childhood. From rumours about her dad to herself, she always strove to be the best version of herself in everything she did, no matter how minor it was. Though it was her strength, it was often her weakness too. She couldn't sit there and be told who she was or what she was good at. No, Mary constantly had to prove it. That ended up with her being overworked and quite frankly underappreciated. Even at Hogwarts, she never had a moment to herself. From classes, homework, training, to working: she never really relaxed with her friends and the only time they were together was when they were working, eating, or going to bed. But that is all she had known. Her father had quite literally worked himself to death, he had been a coal minor which had lead to multiple health issues that the family couldn't adapt to. Sure they didn't have to pay for his actual treatment but the accommodations became too much for her mother to handle on a one person salary. Her mother worked two jobs for their tiny apartment in London as black lone women, it was hard for her to find any real security. So, Mary worked too. Whenever she could. Over the summer, she would take jobs down Diagon alley as it was increasingly easy to get hired then and there. All the money she earned, she would save for when her mum needed it the most because Mrs MacDonald would never accept it otherwise. Even in their financial situation, the two women continued to thrive and only grown closer because of it. 

What some would see as a struggle, Mary did not. She knew exactly what her strengths were and had catered herself around those. The girl thrived in Defence Against the Dark Arts, along with other 'academic' subjects. One thing she both excelled at and enjoyed was Quidditch. She hadn't really told her mum much about the sport, especially at the rate she had been injured by an iron clade ball that was designed to knock you off your broom: mid air. It was best to keep that on the hush side. She had been training to go professional, even had call backs from the English league teams but she had to wait until she was of age to even be accepted. Mary wouldn't be able to play on the team unless she was eighteen. That gave her time though, lots of it. Once she finally made it to the top of Quidditch. Her mother would no longer have to worry, they could move out of that dingy flat and to somewhere nice so she wouldn't have the same fate as her dad. 

It was unfair really. He had passed away when she was only six and at the time she didn't quite understand. When she was first told the news, after he passed on the twenty third of December, her initial response was 'who is going to get his Christmas present now?' as her mind simply couldn't process the fact that he would no longer be there. To be honest, it didn't really sink in until a few years ago. The moment was so out of the blue but she just broke down. That's really how it went every time. Upon being alone, her thoughts would consume her. How immensely alone she felt. The fact that his face had began to slip into a blur. She would never see him again, not in this lifetime. And as she cried her eyes out, she would sometimes look to the sky and hope that he was watching over her proudly. The stars of the night helped soothed her mind even in the bleakest moments, there was always that dazzle of hope that shone through the black abyss. 

♱

That run in with Avery was enough to turn her mood sour, she returned back to her dorms instead. Finding the space completely empty, as usual. It was quite a mood dampener really. She much preferred the nights that she came back from detention, or something, and seeing Alice and Lily singing their heart out poorly to ABBA or Queen whilst Mary danced around the room. Often joining Mary, the small moments where everything to Eleanor. It was not like that would never happen again but with the daily problems occurring, the time they spent together was becoming increasingly less.

When the morning came, Lily had woken the two deep sleepers up and they had headed down for breakfast. Ready for another day. At least it was a Sunday though. The blonde could not hack another moment with Jinky. As they entered the hall, heads turned to stare at her. She knew exactly what this meant. Did she care? No. Well, actually a lot but that was beside the point. El looked as though she wasn't phased at that was all that mattered. The three continued to walk but she knew how uneasy Alice was, she definitely wasn't one for being centre of attention. People only started to return to their own business once they had sat down, Eleanor had really forgotten how nosy people could be. 

And the next morning, the same happened again. Then the next. The day after that was the same and so on and so forth. This continued for at least the next two weeks. Some of them were completely hilarious to her but some where true. Thankfully, with all the outlandish lies, no one believed the ones that were true. 

"Morning." Sirius greeted as the blonde sat down, they were the only ones here on a Friday morning. There was something about a test the group of them had to revise for in ancient runes. The others had Care of Magical Creatures. They both had potions, separate classes of course, in an hour. She had opted to fall back into her dark messy aesthetic that matched Marlene's, it seemed fitting with the new rumours. She had flung her curls into a high pony tail and had applied eyeliner with a smudge under eye. Her socks were thigh high, her signature look, with a neat shirt and tie but the sleeves of her blazer had been rolled up and so had her skirt. Finishing the look with her Dr Marten boots instead of the oxfords. 

"Your very cheerful this morning." She said, pouring herself a cup of water. Over the past few weeks, his mood had certainly uplifted and there was no more random hexing of students which was nice. Eleanor picked up the Daily Prophet, scanning over the headlines. She never did get used to seeing her family sprawled across the pages. It was some ramble about her fathers new company he was investing in. Nothing new and nothing exciting at least. Coming towards the back few pages, she noticed the flyers for missing persons reports. "Do you find it odd?" She spoke out loud, not really mindful if she hadn't made sense or not. 

"Find what odd?" He asked as she passed over the newspaper to him. Scanning the page, there was nothing out of the norm for him.

"Well, they're all muggle born and simply disappear on the same day. Every two weeks." Ellie told him, catching the boys attention. She took this time to butter her bagel and take a bite as he scanned the pages.

"Are you sure?" Sirius responded, frowning lightly. If he was being honest, he only ever read the headlines so he was never truly aware of what was going on. He much preferred muggle issues that really had nothing to do with him. The girl hopped up and headed to the corner of the hall were the stacks of old news paper were stacked. No one read them again to they were very organised. She pulled out a few before heading back.

"Last mass disappearance, before today, was on the tenth." El said, placing that news paper in front of him. "Then it was December twenty seventh then the thirteenth and the first of these were back in October on the fourth. Only two or three go missing but it is the same over and over again." She explained to him, pointing out them all on each paper. "Look nothing changes except on these specific dates. I bet on the seventh, they'll be new faces. All muggleborns from across the globe but they all work in Britain."

"Who do you think it might be?" The boy questioned, already knowing what the answer was likely to be.

"Death eaters. I don't know why but who else would target muggleborns? There's something else though-" Eleanor spoke, looking around for praying ears. The only person that was heading their way was Jinky but she was fairly occupied. 

"What is it?" Sirius asked, looking over the pages of the article. He wondered if anybody else had picked up on this trend. The girl was good at spotting signs, something she learned along with understanding body language. She picked up trends and anomalies quite easily, it was probably why she had been so good at Alchemy at Beauxbatons. 

"I haven't got a clue what he's doing but my father invested in a bakery, underneath turns into this grand sort of ballroom that's password protected. Only his followers and people who support _him_ , where invited. We arrived here on the second. It may not correlate but it is highly likely. I mean- they have been friends since school." She muttered in a very quiet tone, the boys eyes lifted from the newspaper. 

"You think he would?" Sirius asked in a similar low tone.

"At this point, I wouldn't put it past him. He'd do anything to praised. If you don't agree with him, he has no issue with getting rid of someone." She told him when they were pulled out of their conversation when Isadora and Thomas joined them.

♱

It was quiet. When was it not in the Slytherin Common Room? Well, it had been recently. Too quiet, in fact. Nobody dared to speak. Not around that group at least. They had taken over the house. Sitting in the exact places that most of their parents with him. The newly named Lord Voldemort. Sworn to protect wizarding blood from those unworthy. For the most part, he had been working under the radar with a select few. Now, they were ready to tell the world who they are and what they want. At first there was an uproar, especially from the elders. They had seen what Grindelwald had done and could not stand for a repeat of history. Nobody would openly admit their support, not with all of the chaos, but there was many. Too many. But there was also too many that didn't care. Willing to stand idly by.

"Who do they think they are! No respect for their superiors." Mulciber said, pacing back and forth in front of the ashy fire. The others had agreed so easily. Sheep. That's what they were. Avery couldn't help but hold an amused smirk on his face. Him and Rabastan were leaning against the cold stone wall, observing the meeting that was taking place. Both of them weren't really phased, only attending because their families made them. Their lives had been perfectly planned out for them, why would they refuse such a luxury? 

It was common knowledge that Rabastan hardly talked. The only people he had said a word to outside of this group were Dorcas and Eleanor. That was it. He kept to himself. There was many reasons why but if you wanted to pin point an answer was because of fear. The boy could not slip up, not even in the slightest. If he did, he knew what would come. A casual session with the cruciatus curse, delivered by his brother or his wife. His legal guardian. The Lestrange lineage was dying out. Most of his family were in a form of hiding or had died prematurely. Most had changed their name through marriage, joining another family. There was a lot of pressure for him to thrive. Marry well. Continue the name. Become a follower.

"Careful Verny, your starting to sound vain. All you do is talk, you must have realised where your mouth was going to get you." Crouch spoke with an agreeing Yaxley. The two very amused by Mulciber's attempt to climb to the top. He was yet to 'prove' himself, just like some of the other younger members. Even Severus had passed, he had actually come in most useful and had even caught the attention of the Dark Lord. 

"Right." The boy sneered, sick of being undermined by those older then him. "I'll show them. You watch." He said, heading to his dorm as they others burst into laughter. He couldn't help the rage that had built up within him. The plan would go ahead as planned. No longer would he wait and be told what to do. It was time for him to take things into his own hands. For once, his power wouldn't be underestimated. That friendship group would be at his mercy. He just had to worm his way in. Going straight to the top wasn't smart, he knew that. There was the perfect target. Meek, lonely, quiet: no one would notice, not until he had gone at least.

♱

"It will be fun! Plus, Isadora needs the practise." Marlene encouraged, pulling Eleanor over to the bed that the others were gathered around. It was only the usual four with Isadora. They had just wanted some alone time with all the chaos over the weeks. Everyone had agreed to return to their original groups for the evening as all of them together was often overwhelming. 

"Pass your cup Lily." Isadora said before being passed the ceramic tea cup. "Okay." She looked down her list of symbols as she examined the pattern. Eleanor had always been quite interested in divinations but had never had the opportunity to take it. "On the bottom of the slope represents the future. Now your symbols seem to be bordering near future. Now if you look here-" Isadora held up the cup to Lily and pointed at the two different shapes as she explained. "You can see the subtle heart and over here is the a small chain. This means you can expect love and responsibility."

"I always knew Lily would be pregnant first." Delilah said, earning a small laugh from the other two. The redhead, however, started to blush and looked up to Isadora for confirmation. 

"It is quite likely but that doesn't mean that will happen. The responsibility could be associated with work." The girl told her which seemed to calm Lily a bit but she couldn't help but smile at the thought of having a child. "But in the distant future there's a cross. Meaning warning, caution, stop. Be careful of the choices you make."

"What do you mean?" Lily questioned, looking down at the fairly bold cross in the centre of her cup. "Caution. Like... death?" She added in a whisper.

"Everyone will pass eventually. This may not be talking about yourself but someone close to you. Whoever it may be, your influence could change their fate." Isadora told her, she mostly got sun's or cup's when reading others tea leaves. This was quite an experience for her too. "Delilah. Your turn." And when she received this cup, her face lit up slightly. "On the outer rim there is a downwards arrow, suggesting a current struggle. But with a bit of love, this will change. As seen through your wheel and heart. The distant future holds a sun. Power, success, or new beginnings." She explained. Delilah's eyes flickered to El who smiled warmly at her. There was hope. "Marlene. Cup please!" For a second she paused, looking over the symbols again. "In your near future there will be trials and suffering but there is great happiness for a while after that. As seen through your cross and sun. But..." There was a moment of silence.

"What is it?" Marlene quizzed, becoming increasingly concerned at what she may have got.

"There's a cat and a skull. It may mean that you have a deceitful friend that will bring great danger your way..." Isadora explained, staring at each symbol. This really wasn't fun at all. Well, except for Delilah. At least one of them would have a happy life. "Eleanor. Cup." She said, really not wanting to see what was to come. Since meeting the blonde, she had come to realise that El's life had not been great. Far from it. So after seeing those cups, she wasn't exactly excited for this one. 

And she had a good reason to be. When her eye caught the symbol, the cup almost fell to the floor. Luckily, Lily caught it and looked at the symbol, gulping instantly. At the bottom of her cup sat the Grim...

"What is it?" El asked, looking between the two. The redhead held up the cup to show the others and Marlene immediately squeezed her hand but she didn't understand what it was like they all clearly did. 

"El... That's the grim. It is said to be one of the darkest omens of our world. A well-known omen, the Grim has earned infamy throughout the wizarding world and is considered to be one of the worst, if not the worst, omens around. Because it's an omen of death, which is reputed to bring about the demise of the person who encounters it." Isadora told her and the group fell silent, out of fear. As she looked at that black dog, she couldn't bring herself to care as much as her friends did. A destiny of such. Death was often a kindness. Something she had pleaded for many time but was never granted. Maybe she was lucky after all. Deep down, she wanted to smile. It was like a peace of mind. No one could save her from this and for that she was excited. They all knew what was to come now. There was no guilt because she hadn't made this choice, eventually she'd be taken by this omen to somewhere that she wouldn't suffer. True tranquillity. 


	19. school seller

  
**_chapter nineteen_ **

「 school seller」

♱

_The fame that goes with wealth and beauty is fleeting and fragile; intellectual superiority is a possession glorious and eternal._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _SINCE THE WHOLE_** situation regarding the grim, the girls had become far too nice. All four of them were acting as if they had to walk on egg shells and it was becoming increasingly annoying to the blonde. She wanted them to pretend like nothing ever happened, like she so often did, but they never did. They treat her like a porcelain doll, about to shatter with one wrong move. It was the same repetitive process: Eleanor messed up in some way and they'd retort to treating her with caution as if she couldn't handle what was thrown her way. That annoyed the girl immensely. It was almost as if they undermined her, she possibly couldn't be strong enough to manage reality alongside this information. Little did know how glad she was feeling; they thought that she had a strong poker face but she was genuinely glad. And Eleanor Westbrook was probably the only person in history that sought comfort in the grim.

To avoid them, she had gone to practising her ballet or she spent time with Mary and Alice. The three ended up merging with the seventh years, thanks to Alice, and that ended up with El coming back high every other night. Lily had been down her throat about it for the past three days which only pushed her to smoke more.

It was currently lunchtime and the girl had finished her lessons for the day. She had headed outside to relieve some stress. McGonagall had given her another detention for a missing assignment, which is stupid really because she had only missed two. That was record numbers for Eleanor. She didn't see the point in them, it didn't help her at all and it didn't affect her grade so she'd happily take detention - which usually took up less time then the actual scroll she was supposed to write for said lesson. When she received the detention, she could sense Lily's disappointment as she shocked her head at her. Honestly, she wasn't failing a class so she didn't understand why the redhead was bothered. Plus, it wasn't anything serious, just a bit of smoking.

For the past few months, she had been increasingly frustrated. It didn't happen much but now at every minor inconvenience, she seemed to get increasingly stressed. The girl knew exactly why but there was not much she could do about it. It had been months; another record for the Westbrook. Though, the consequence had been smoking an excessive amount.

Sitting under a tree on the edge of the forest, she stared out into the lake as she reached for the carton in her blazer pocket. This the only time she'd be able to escape since Lily wasn't in her last lesson. She pulled out a single cigarette and placed it between her rosy lips as she fumbled for her lighter. There was voices nearby and she listened intently.

"A pack of twenty - I don't care about brand. Whatever the cheapest is." A feminine voice mumbled in a worried tone, it was an odd encounter with some sort of dealer and the girl was clearly knew to this.

"£10." A familiar voice said in return as there was a sound of a zipper and shuffling. Then there was a gasp.

"I- What? They're like £5 at the shop." The girl retorted, slightly concerned by the fact that they were so much.

"Then go buy them from the shop." He said blankly, she knew exactly who it was. Her brows pulled down into a frown at the thought. That boy was probably the last person she'd expected.

"Yeah. Your paying for the service. There's nowhere else to get these from. Not from round here." A second voice chimed in, one familiar to the girl too. Far too familiar. She shouldn't be here. It felt wrong. Really wrong. This was something that she shouldn't be hearing.

"Fine." The girl replied with a huff and then there was some shuffling and the girl passed her, at least fifteen feet away. It was Clementine, her sisters new friend. Strange. She kept quite though.

El fumbled with her lighter, trying to light her cigarette. Unfortunately for her, the wind was a bit to strong so the flame seemed burn out before it got close enough. Her thumb was becoming a vibrant red and numb from the amount of times she had struck the metal wheel to get said flame.

"Fuck off." She said, throwing the lighter onto the ground in a moment of anger that wasn't like her at all. It was so easy for her fuse to blow that she just needed to smoke more which only lead to more irritability. There was only so many ways to relieve stress and nothing was currently working.

"Oi, Westbrook." Someone called, heading towards her. She sucked in a breath so she didn't snap at them before proceeding to turn her head towards the two approaching boys. "What you doing in our spot?" Sirius called over to her, only noticing her cigarette once they grew closer. He smiled smugly, deciding to himself that she could stay.

"Well, I've been coming here for weeks and haven't seen you once so I suppose that it's mine now." The blonde challenged with a slightly cocky tone, picking up her lighter to try once more. Thankfully it worked and she inhaled a puff of her cigarette, leaning back and letting her eyes flutter close as she exhaled slowly.

"That's because you come out here during the day." He replied, sitting on her right whilst Remus sat on her left, sandwiching her between the two. The girl reopened her eyes and raised a brow at the boy who was busy getting something out of his leather jacket. Sirius Black was right about one thing, he _did_ look pretty good in a leather jacket.

"What's the point when I can jump out of a hatch outside my room whilst everyone sleeps. Coming here seems... counterproductive." She replied to him as she took another drag, making sure that she wasn't taking to long that it would go out as El had a tendency to let it do so.

The boy threw something to Remus, a pack of pouch tobacco. It didn't take long for the boy with sandy blonde hair to roll his cigarette as pass it back to Sirius, leaving El both surprised and impressed. In that moment, she realised how little she truly knew about everyone. It was weird how one action could tumble a whole illusion. The once depicted boy of shyness and innocence was truly far from it and Eleanor was about to find out his true self.

Since he was little, Remus had a lot of issues pertaining to himself and who he was. His parents locked him up at the bottom of the garden for most of his life with nothing but his books. To most he seemed particularly smart but he had never been top of the class or one to complete his assignments. He was one to be able to quote a book from memory and get the grades he needed to pass his exams. It was practical but not efficient. Unlike James and Sirius, he had to study or he had to practise that spell a few more times but he came out triumphantly.

Due to his time pent up alone, the boy lacked fundamental social skills that often came easy to most. He often stayed quiet around other people. Most of his peers had known him for the time he had lashed out on Snape last year after teasing him about the upcoming moon. To most, he was mysterious. There was something about Eleanor that had allowed him to open up instantly. Showing the weakest sides to him before she saw the strongest. After all, he was a marauder. His attitude and behaviour effected most by his only friends, especially Sirius. The two hadn't been the closest when the group formed and after the incident it was a strain on an already rocky friendship. But this tree was the place they connected really. At the tree they bonded about their shitty families and their tools of escapism and more that they hadn't really cared to know about each other beforehand.

Now Eleanor sat there questioning herself because it wasn't just Remus. She knew nobody here, even Lily -who she had known since she was a literal baby- was a complete mind boggle to her. Everyday she had sat and pretended like she did, as if she had been there all along but she hadn't. The immediacy that she divulged into new friendships stemmed from her thirst to not be forgotten. But she hadn't even realised how drained her existing friendships were. Take Sirius for example, she knew a completely different side to him that everyone else did. The side that lacked his poor judgement and ever growing rage; she was so blind to all of them. A part of her was always so distanced though, just like theirs had. The blonde withdrew herself to save them the hassle of her fuck over of a life. She then selfishly neglected the other parts of her friends to try and torment herself into being better. If they appeared perfect to her then she could manipulate herself into something equally matched to them. Truth was hard to come by and was even harder to maintain. It can make you or destroy you in a couple of seconds.

"How's the book going?" Eleanor asked, turning to look at Remus who was staring out at the lake. He smiled lightly as he took a drag from him cigarette. Though, he understood her pain of being 'different', he sought a comfort in the fact that she might not be human, as selfish as that sounds, and then he wouldn't be so alone. 

"I haven't read anymore but they have Quidditch practise again soon. If you come over then, I can tell you what I know so far." He said in a hushed whisper so that the boy on her left didn't here. The girl nodded in agreement to the arrangement and swivelled back to face the lake. Sirius was currently frowning, only hearing fragments of what they had said. It had nothing to do with him though, so he stayed silent. 

"So, how come you two sneak out here?" She asked them as she came to the end of her cigarette, blowing out a few rings of smoke as she soaked in the nature. It was refreshing being outside because most days she finished when the sun had already set. 

"Well, I have been coming here since second year and I asked Remus if he wanted to join me when James almost floored him after finding out that he smoked." Sirius explained, El looked between them and Remus nodded to signify its truth. The girl couldn't help but laugh lightly at the thought of an angry James.

"Lily is the same. I'm pretty sure she's about to rip my head off. She was even starting on Marls yesterday and she never gets caught." Eleanor said, remembering the moment after their charms lesson when she caught the two on the covered bridge. It was just before El left to meet Aaron and she was almost dragged back to the dorms by the ear. As much as the redhead was currently annoying her, it was almost her birthday and they still needed some help. "Actually, I've been meaning to ask you two and the others about something we need help on."

"Yeah and what is it?" Sirius asked, some of his smoke was hitting her face. For a moment, she got side tracked as she took in his appearance. The leather jacket, his neatly pressed shirt, a messy tie, the multiple rings on his hands, his laid back composure, the way the smoke trickled from his rosy lips: something about him was inebriating. She didn't know why and often tried to remind herself that he was just like everyone else. It took her a moment to snap out of her short lived daze, to explain the plan for Lily's birthday to both of them.

♱

With the dark nights, Isadora hadn't spent much time in the gardens and now she refused to go alone. Whether she believed Regulus or not was another issue. But most of the time she dragged El or Delilah down to be with her. She was currently sat with Lily, Thomas, and Delilah as she sketched the view of the lake, sitting under a large evergreen tree. 

"Can you believe it! He looked at me like I was the crazy one. Snape hasn't talked to me in weeks, he practically avoids me and I'm the crazy one? It's preposterous! Absolutely ludicrous if you ask me. Then he has the audacity to say that I shouldn't be going on a date with Jack. Like I would understand if it was someone like Potter but what has Jack ever done to him? Nothing. Why does he get to avoid me for so long, only to come back and try to control my life. I think it's those new friends of his. Yes, definitely. He has been so distant since the start of this year and I don't know why..." Lily ranted as she passed up and down, in front of the other three. It was more of a rant to herself as every time someone tried to chime in, she'd cut them off.

"I'm sure he means well." Delilah reasoned with the girl. "Look, it seems bad but you have to think about it from his perspective. He was being bullied and bullied others for so long on his own, it was only a matter of time for him to latch onto someone. Sure, they are far from good people but that doesn't make him bad, not yet at least."

"I suppose." Lily sighed, becoming increasingly tired of making excuses for him. "But they actively hate me, well, people of my blood 'status'. Doesn't he realise how harmful that is to me? I don't want to sound selfish but we're friends. When Ellie left, he was the only one I had left but now he just wants to abandon me for them? Those heartless twats! They don't care about him, he must know that. Right?" She said as her voice trailed off into nothing. The redhead stared at the lake, reminded of the summer many years ago.

_"Freak!" Petunia shouted, swatting the little daisy from the redheads hand. She instantly recoiled, taking a few steps backwards as she watched her older sister with wide eyes. Lily didn't want to believe it, she thought her sister would be just as enthralled as she was. But, no. That was the first time in her life were she felt like she didn't belong and it only got worse through the years. "I'm going to tell mummy. Your a freak!" She called as Lily backed up to the tree. "Your a freak, Lily!" Petunia continued, in hopes of making her self feel better. To make her feel like she wasn't just ordinary while her sister got to be everything she wanted to be. As a boy stepped out of the old oak tree, Petunia stepped back as she gulped. Instantly running away from the strange boy, she left Lily completely and utterly alone. From then on, they weren't ever truly sisters again..._

_The boy to her right had plucked a piece of grass, just by his feet, and let it spin in the air towards her. When she caught it, she smiled lightly to herself. It wasn't just her. There was a possibility that her sister was wrong and there was a place for people like her: one where she'd be accepted. Her eyes fluttered up to the mysterious boy and her smile only grew wider, one of which he returned._

_"She's jealous. She's ordinary and your special." Snape told her as they laid by the lake of their quaint town. The nippy air of a English summer swept over the two as the sun shone dully over the swinging trees._

_"That's mean, Severus." Lily informed her new friend, turning to look at his rigid composure. He looked down at her for a moment and blinked, surprised at how fiercely she protected her sister even after she had sprouted so much hate. Petunia had isolated her, made her feel less then but she refused to not defend her. At the time, it seemed normal. It was Lily's first time being told that she was worthless in someone's eyes and it definitely wasn't the last. To this day, she would find excuses for those who did her wrong and didn't deserve another chance. But Lily focused on the good, the part of them that could flourish if they desired. They never did though._

_Around them, leaves fell in formation. Swooping through the air until they gracefully touched the barricades of grass blades. The water of the lake carefully lapped up the land, creating serenity around the girl who's head was full of chaos. How could she do such things but her sister couldn't? It made no sense to her._

_There was a crack of twigs from behind them, followed by a pair of laughter. Two figures ran out, hand in hand, in their matching pinafores. The two were recognisable to Lily and she sat up with a bright smile on her face as she waved to them. Both Adelaide and Eleanor were whispering to each other, something that neither of the other two could hear. They looked like twins, only differentiated by eye and hair colour. Even at the age of nine, their beauty was still prevalent in their features and showed what their future would be._

_"Ellie, Ada! Come meet my new friend. This is Severus." She introduced as the two joined them by the lake. The boy looked terribly awkward but was smiling nonetheless. "This is my best friend Eleanor and her sister Adelaide, they live next door to me. They can also do magic." Lily explained proudly as the blonde observed him. There was something off about him but she couldn't pinpoint what it was. So, she smiled at him and proceeded to pull him in for a hug, catching the boy off guard._

_"What? You can do magic as well! That's so cool. Just wait until we all go to Hogwarts." Ada said happily, over the moon at the thought of a new friend. The boy nodded at her and got the understanding that they weren't muggleborn unlike Lily._

_"Wh- What is a hog-warts?" The redhead asked with a skewed face. It sounded quite ridiculous and frankly quite disgusting. Who in their right mind would name something after a hog or a wart? They were two totally gross things in her opinion._

_"According to my Mother, it is the best wizarding school in the world! We get to learn about our magic and how to use it. When we're eleven, we're supposed to get a letter to invite us there. All of us will get to go!" Eleanor explain excitedly, making Ada giggle beside her. Her best friend lit up with joy at the thought. There, she wouldn't be alone._

_"Really. That's amazing! Will Petunia be able to go?" She asked, looking between them all ecstatically. If she could then her sister wouldn't see her as a freak anymore. They could do everything together like the did before. But everyone stayed silent, not wanting to tell the girl who was still hopeful._

"Honestly Lily, he isn't a child anymore. Whatever he decides to do, it is on him. If he wants to suck off some wankers, let him." Thomas told her, not even looking up from his book. The other two let out muffled laughter as Lily's lips twitched upwards before joining them in their laughter. 

Taking a seat between Tom and Isadora, she let out a slight sigh. Very much enjoying the company of the three Hufflepuff's. It was refreshing really. They were far more relaxed and it was nice to just take things steady for once. Whilst Isadora sketched, Thomas read and Delilah made a flower crown: she just chilled and let her mind empty.

"Where's Marlene?" Delilah quizzed as she picked at the daisies, to try and tie them all together because the stalks were quite flimsy. 

"With El." The redhead replied monotonously. Them two were just another thing that was adding to her stress. They weren't good together and encouraged each other into stuff that they shouldn't but no one else seemed to realise. She knew exactly what the two were up to. 

"Don't you think they spend an excessive amount of time together, like they always have. I know they're really close and all but they're so... intimate too. I don't get what's so between them two." Delilah pondered out loud, causing Lily to frown. She never really thought about that, only what they were doing together. By her side, Thomas was smirking as he read his book whilst he listened to the two girls. 

♱

It came to that time of the month were the moon was full once more. The day was long but the night was even longer. Only ten minutes left until the sun set for the evening. Unlike in the height of summer when the nights only lasted seven hours, the nights currently lasted for about sixteen hours. For Remus, it was extremely exhausting and just moments of torture, a fate he wouldn't wish on his sworn enemy.

The grounds of Hogwarts were misty. As the grass became frosty and the skeleton trees forgot how to move, the birds still reeked havoc as they shot through the air. With the cold crisp air came the dewy landscape as nature came to heal itself for the next morning, though, in the peak of winter it was hard to achieve.

Like every moon, El had plans to stay up. She had already had multiple messages from Emma and things seemed to be settling again. In the morning, she would be informed of how Celine was getting on. But for now, she was sat under the tree with her head on Marlene's lap as she faced Remus. Trying to calm his nerves, she had offered him a cigarette and the three were currently smoking as the sky was blending from orange to red to black. Remus was on edge, especially since the girls had waited so long and the others wasn't anywhere in sight. 

"Come on then, we best get to dinner. Remus, are you going to wait here for the boys?" She asked, already knowing the answer but she didn't want Marlene to be suspicious. The boy nodded at her as she jumped up, helping Marls up after. Whilst the other dusted herself off, El pulled the boy into a hug and proceeded to whisper. "I'll see you in morning. You'll be alright, I promise." He gave her a half-hearted smile before she pulled away and proceeded to walk away, hand-in-hand with Marlene. Remus watched intently at the two laughing teens that were so comfortable with each other, he paused as he thought of Sirius and the words he exchanged with James in the middle of the night. It would seem as though _his_ Ella had eyes for another.

"Why's he waiting out there?" Marlene whispered, glancing back at the boy who had began to also move across the grounds but in the opposite direction. It was freezing outside but the castle wasn't much warmer. 

"They said something about going in the forest - I don't really know." The girl answered, causing Marls to smile. _How typical_ , she thought as she shook her head at the thought. They had tried that a year or two ago, she couldn't really remember, and they ended up hospitalised.

As Remus waited near the whomping willow, making sure he was out of reach from the violet swings and saws of each branch. His heart was pumping insanely fast as he knew that his transformation was coming any moment now. See there was a large problem with the _'salutem exhausit'_ and was the fact that he didn't know when his transformation was coming. Yes, the pain was gone but that made him on edge. The boy would much rather suffer then potentially risk someone's life. 

Just as he was about to get up and find a way to the shack on his own, something caught his attention. A faint whistle in the form of a tune. It was vaguely familiar to him. After a moment, his limps ached lightly as he became drowsy, his whole body washed over in exhaustion as the moon began to rise over the horizon. He hadn't seen it yet, there was still time. But his lids fluttered shut as the tune guided him in to a state of sombreness. 

Eventually, the boys arrived in a rush. A wash of relief came over them when they found Remus, not turned. It was a strange sight, at least, and each boy became increasingly concerned. But there was no time to waste. They didn't know when he would awake. Peter shrunk down into his rat form and darted towards the tree. The branches swung aggressively at the ground but never once hit him. 

Careful not to wake him, James held up one side of him whilst Sirius had the other and they proceeded to move down the tunnel when the tree was frozen. They tapped the knot once more so that Remus couldn't escape without them. Peter had turned back and was leading the way as he cast lumos to light up the dingy passage. As they walked, the boy that they were hoisting up was stirring from his slumber so they had to move swiftly. Placing him in his chair, the three backed away as his eyes shot open. He was utterly confused but that was the least of his problems as the moon peaked through the rotting boards of the shrieking shack. Eyes dilating and bones breaking, his body began to shift but he felt nothing but discomfort.


	20. bow to your superior

  
**_chapter twenty_ **

「 _bow to your superior_ 」

♱

It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace.

♱  
  
  
  
  


 ** _Song Credit-_** ABBA {Dancing Queen}  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _AT AROUND EIGHT_** in the morning, the sun had rose and the boys were heading back to their dorm. Tonight he had gained no injuries which was surprising to them all but they were thankful nonetheless. Like on every full moon, Eleanor was waiting on the common room sofa and this time she was accompanied by Delilah - who was on the verge of sleep. El was in the middle of writing a note back to her friend Emma when the four entered the common room, each as tired as the next. Then she smiled brightly when she had seen that Remus was untouched.

"Morning." She said, being careful not to disturb Delilah as she had fallen into a deep slumber. They all stopped in their tracks and two out of three looked startled by her presents. Sirius just smiled, mumbling a greeting before he continued.

"Oh- El. W-What are you-" James fumbled over his words, confused as to why she was there.

"I stay up every moon. Didn't anyone say?" She said as a frown formed on her face. The boys shook their head as Remus began to stir. "Come on, before someone hears us." El signalled towards the staircase and with a nod, they followed after her.

The four of them entered the dorm and she helped them lower Remus onto his bed. Sitting on the edge of his bed, she raised her hand to his forehead. Thankfully, his temperature was moderate in his condition. The sweats had calmed down and his breathing was no longer rigged. Grabbing the glass on his bedside table, she poured some of the salutemexhausit into the bottom before she whispered 'aguamenti' and filled the glass.

When she turned her head, James and Peter were gaping at her as if she had done the impossible. They sat down on the bed opposite her and she raised a brow at them.

"So what exactly do you know?" Peter asked cautiously, looking as if he might disappear if she looked at him the wrong way. There was a weird atmosphere that stuffed the room, they didn't trust her. Not fully.

"That your animagus? I know that. Though, I guess that it's illegally since you look three words away from a heart attack." El answered, an amused smile forming on her face as James gulped.

"That's not funny! You could get us locked up if you spill." James called out and the blonde couldn't help but laugh at his little out burst.

"I know." She replied simply, the boy across from her frowned. "It's nice to know you trust me." Ellie said sarcastically and James scoffed.

"Well, I'm sorry! You seem to forget that we've only known you three months and your father is-" The bespectacled boy's voice trailed off when he realised what he had just said. A silence swept over them as he gulped. "I didn't mean that." James said, trying to worm his way out of it.

"Yes, you did." The blonde shot back, a hint of annoyance growing in her glance. He began to look anywhere but at Eleanor and twiddled his thumbs. "Since I've got here, all I have done is help Remus. Why the hell would I say anything?" She quizzed as Peter sucked in a deep breath, he wasn't one for confrontation. Before James could reply, the boy next to her began to stir which caught El's attention. His eyes flickered open and he looked around, very unsure of his surroundings.

"El?" He spoke as he struggled to sit. The girl placed a hand on his shoulder to keep him down so he wouldn't hurt himself. "What's happened? Where am I?" Remus questioned as all his limps began to ache, exhaustion whipping over him.

"In your dorm room. Your okay. I promised didn't I?" El said with that hypnotising smile of hers, he couldn't help but smile too. Turning to the side, her smile faltered but didn't completely disappear. "Get some sleep, I've got him." She said softly to the two boys. That was enough for Peter as he jumped up but James seemed weary. The two stared at each other until he gave in. They clambered into the bathroom with Sirius to brush their teeth before they slept and El turned her attention back to the boy in the bed.

"What's up? You seem off." Remus said as he observed her. She couldn't help but laugh lightly. The girl couldn't think of a time we're he wasn't thinking of someone else.

"When will you think of yourself first? Honestly Remus, if you don't take care of yourself how are you going to look after anyone else?" Ellie asked as she took one of his hands in his. Flinching lightly, he soon settled into the touch as he sought comfort in the girl. Until he came to Hogwarts, he hadn't known much. For too long, he had gone without any sort of platonic intimacy and now he was addicted. It was hard to explain but El made him comfortable. Since she asked him to read that book, there was a sense of solidarity as if it was true, she could understand.

"I would say that you need to take that advice, more than me." He said with a small smirk and she acted as if she were offended by such a statement. Slowly, he pushed him self upwards so his head was resting on the headboard but he was still practically laying down. The door opened and some slight whispers escaped from the other room. Each boy had climbed into bed after muttering a goodnight. "What's up with them?" Remus quizzed quietly as Peter's snores could already be heard.

"He's just worried about you." El answered but Remus didn't believe her. Though, he had heard them before he had awoke and had become increasingly concerned by the way they were going. "You've got dirt on your face." She told him, staring at the streak that ran across his cheek from where he'd fallen asleep. Instantly bringing his hand up to his cheek, he rubbed the spot aggressively to no avail, causing her to bite back a giggle. "Here." The girl shuffled forward and wipe her sleeve against the dried up mud until it was flaking off of his cheek. "Your a mess." She stated, looking at his rough look hair and tatty clothing.

"Still looking better then you." Remus said teasingly with a shot of confidence. The girl gasped at his remark, not expecting such a comeback, until it faded into a laugh. He joined her laughter but the aching of his body soon caught up with him. As he started to splutter, she grabbed the glass of solution that she had made earlier and waited till he settled lightly to pass him it. His hand shook as he took a sip and handed the glass back to her. "Have you ever thought of using that?" The boy asked as he settled back down into his bed.

"For what?" She asked, slightly slow from her lack of sleep. Rubbing her eyes softly, she yawned widely with a stretch.

"When there's a storm." He answered with an ounce of guilt for keeping he up. It was her choice but Remus felt like he didn't deserve it.

"I've never thought about it. Next time, I'll try." She told him and it was strange that she had never came to that conclusion before.

"You should try get some sleep, it's Lily's birthday today. You'll need your energy." He said, causing her to smile. They had some grand plans that Delilah and Marlene had plotted.

"I am up for the day. I'll have some coffee and I'll be set. Plus, I need to avoid Lily for this to work and she'll be up in... one hour." She answered after checking the cracked watch on his dresser. "Your the one that should rest, come on." Eleanor said sorting out his pillows for him, she struggled to keep in a laugh. The boy tried to protest but she glared down at him. "I am not scared to wake James and make him watch over you." She challenged him and Remus sighed in defeat, a smile still prevalent on both of their faces. "Goodnight." El said, ruffling up his hair as she stood up. He groaned as he turned over and mumbled a muffled response.

Without another thought, she rounded his bed and headed towards the door. Her hand hovered over the handle and she turned back to look at them. Remus had done as he was told and had gone back to sleep. After a moment, her eyes landed on Sirius who's long black hair hand hung across his face. Even when he was asleep - he managed to still look good. However, she didn't expect his eyes to open. When he saw her, he smiled lightly.

"Your still here." He whispered, stretching before he sat up and ran a hand through his untamed hair.

"I'm still here." Eleanor returned in a soft tone. A smile drawing on her rosy lips. "You should be sleeping, though." She added, resting her back against the door as she spoke to him. The boy waved her over and she frowned at him. "What?"

"Just come here." Sirius whisper shouted, her eyes shot around the room to check if anyone had awoken. Once in the clear, she tiptoed her way over to his bed and sat on the edge with him. Her eyes flickered over to him and he had closed his eyes once more but had a smug smile on his face. "Lie down." He instructed and she did so with a huff.

"Happy now?" Eleanor questioned as she turned her towards him. He was already looking down at her with a look that she couldn't quite place. Her gut wrenched and she felt that swarm of butterflies that she swore she got rid of. The blonde looked down momentarily as she felt her cheeks begin to heat violently, though it was hard to see her rouge cheeks in the darkness.

"Very much so." The boy said, his breath tickling her neck which sent goosebumps racing across her pale skin. She lifted her eyes back to him and he was just observing her. Freckled cheeks, delicately sharp jaw, skin like snow, layers of of golden silk, and those eyes as deep as the forbidden forest - bright and precious like an emerald. There was no such thing as perfection but on the outside, Eleanor was not short of it. And when she smiled, her features brightened up and appeared like angel. Maybe she was. An angel fallen from grace, that is.

She turned to face the ceiling and her head rested on his bare shoulder, trying to keep awake. In this moment, she felt small again, protected from the world. Through the silence, she could hear her heart beating fast in her ear as her hand fell on top of his.

At first, he flinched from the contact. Just like Remus, he wasn't used to any form touch, maybe a slap if he was lucky. He tried his hardest to get used to it but he couldn't help his startled reaction to each touch. It was weird; nobody really knows who there first hug was - it wasn't a thing. People knew who their first kiss was or the first time they slept with someone, Sirius still remembered his first hug vividly. As always, he was sitting in the ballroom of another pureblood party. At the time he was only six and just wanted to go play outside with all the other children. He wasn't allowed because 'her son would never be caught dead on a filthy muggle contraption, mingling with those degenerates'. It was the first time that he met the girl currently by his side. When they met, she had skipped in with her sister and the two were giggling over something. Both Walburga and Orion had been exited to meet the Westbrook family. His mother had been gossiping about Florence's etiquette and beauty since they found out that they we're going to be there. Though they weren't famous at the time, the family was popular amongst the community of purebloods. The blonde had smiled at him upon arriving, a bright twinkle in her eye that only her mother could match. And when Walburga introduced him, the girl had let go of her sister and had pulled him into a hug, causing the parents to awe at the gesture.

Without saying a word, he turned his arm over so his palm was facing upwards. The girl pushed for a second as her heart almost pounded out of her chest. That was the second she realised that being selfish wasn't so bad sometimes. Choosing her own happiness wasn't her fault. She couldn't make everybody happy, that wouldn't end well for anyone, but she could allow herself to give into that temptation. Whatever she felt, she knew what she wanted in the end. The longer she pretended that she didn't, the more she'd hurt others. But she liked this. Feeling wanted. So maybe she didn't know Marlene's or Sirius' intentions but for once she believed that they were more then her physical self. Actually, she sought comfort in the fact that two people may actually like her for something more then her body, as sorrowful as that sounded. There was something in the way though. She couldn't have both. She would be more than selfish to choose both. She didn't deserve both. No matter how she currently felt about either of them, she knew that she couldn't even risk losing Marlene. If that was cowardice or not, she didn't care. She could was the only one she had been able to open up to, she simply couldn't lose that. So, yes, she was being selfish, for herself and for Marlene. Being more than friends would ruin them forever.

With one last deep breath, she placed her hand back on top of his. Her fingers entwined with his and locked together. There was a pause as they stayed still, just embracing the moment. His thumb grazed his over her hand carefully as if one wrong move would scare her away. It was different but it was right. Though she was sceptical, there was something about him that made her feel like she belonged. For now, she had made her choice. Maybe her judgement was smeared by her fatigue but it seemed good for the time being.   
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


El didn't know how long she had been laying there but the sun was now trying to beat it's way through the old dusty curtains that lined the windows. The boy had fallen asleep not long after and she refused to move so she didn't wake him. Slowly, she sat up and untangled herself from his hold on her hand. He was sound asleep, breathing lightly as his eyes flickered from a dream he was having. Smiling down at him, she turned away and departed out of the common room and shook Delilah awake.

"Come on. Lily might have seen you already, we need to go." Eleanor hissed to the confused girl. She was still taking in her surroundings but she let Eleanor guide her towards the Hufflepuff common room. Unfortunately, she was too tired to see Remus and would have to wait until later. For now, she just wanted to curl up and sleep.

They collected some breakfast things from the kitchen and headed up to Marlene and Delilah's dorm where the blonde was already waiting. She set Delilah a certain amount to eat and, slowly, they were ready. From curling their hair to doing their makeup, they got ready for what was to come. A small sense of guilt overrode the girl but it was going to be worth it. Lily loved nothing more then their band and after a lot of heavy persuasion, Marlene had gotten El to agree to do it.

The three wore matching outfits, one that they had planned around Lily's chosen outfit. It was like the outfit she had worn on the first day but far more out there - they were quite surprised by Lily's choosing. Wearing a plain black skirt with thigh high socks, their platforms boots were of matching colours to their corseted lace and satin top - thanks to Eleanor's basically unlimited budget. Lily had chosen a royal blue colour to complement her skin tone, Delilah had chosen a sage green, Marlene had chosen a deep burgundy, and Eleanor had gone with a pastel pink. It was pretty, she had to admit but definitely out of Lily's style.

"Are you ready?" Marlene asked as she joined El's side. They were looking in the mirror as the girl finished layering her jewellery. Her hands were shaking with nerves because she had never done something like this, it was all Marls. "Hey. Look, you'll be great. Come on, your a better singer then me."

"Why do people stare then? It's so... unnerving." El replied, swallowing the lump in her throat. Once she started, everything would be okay. It was just the waiting.

"Because your so hypnotising." She replied with a dreamy smile that made the other blush lightly. Grabbing her hand, she moved to exit the bathroom. "Now, we need to go. They're waiting for us." Marlene said. Ellie followed her and grabbed ahold of Delilah as they ran out the corridor together. The rush clouding her thoughts as they went to find the marauders.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


"I know that I've been on their backs because I want what's truly best for them. But- my birthday... I just. Even with them being annoyed at me, I thought they'd at least wish me happy birthday. Eleanor didn't even come to the dorm last night." The redhead stressed as she approached the Gryffindor table. There was low excited chatter as the other students had been informed for such events. All except the birthday girl. She sat between Alice and Mary with Isadora and Thomas opposite her. They were quickly running out of time and they all waited impatiently for their signal.  
  
  


"So, everything is ready. Right?" Eleanor repeated to James who looked far too smug for her own liking. "If this doesn't go well, we are dead meat. I'm sure Lily is already preparing to swing for me, now she has the perfect excuse." The blonde stressed as she paced outside of the great hall, her nerves where chewing her alive.

"Relax. We know what we're doing." Peter said as Sirius and Remus bursted through a side door, looking severely out of breath.

"Ready when you are." Remus told them and with one last deep breath, the hall was plunged into darkness.  
  


Lily looked around panicked, nobody else but the teachers seemed fussed about the commotion. She couldn't sense anyone around her and she was about to stand up when a light shone brightly on only her. Looking around, she couldn't see anyone around. Not Alice, not Mary, not Tom, not Isadora; she had been abandoned again, on her birthday. Sinking back into her chair, she hid her face as low chatter emerged. Though the redhead loved being the centre of attention, this was not how she wanted to be: completely alone. She felt as if she were being mocked.

But then some music started to play. It was familiar to her. A smile grazed her lips as she recognised it to be the single that she had been playing none stop for the past few months. Dancing Queen by ABBA, one of her ultimate favourite bands. It wasn't quite how she remembered it but there was nothing like a surprise to cheer her up.

"Friday night and the lights are low" A first voice sang as some passed through the groups of surrounding students that had created a blockade. "Looking out for the place to go." The familiar voice continued, she new it was Delilah even without seeing her.

"Where they play the right music, getting in the swing" Marlene stepped up onto the Hufflepuff table, although the only light was on Lily. "You come in to look for a king..." 

"Anybody could be that guy," The other sang, stepping up onto the Gryffindor table. Everyone was slightly shocked. There something about her voice that lured them in, like an inexpiable force. "Night is young and the music's high" El continued, hitting the high note perfectly. It was pure heaven to their ears. 

"With a bit of rock music, everything is fine" Delilah took over, forming into a position for when the lights flickered onto her. 

"You're in the mood for a dance" Marlene continued on after her, following Delilah's lead and striking a pose. Though they weren't necessary, the three had opted for hand held microphones to keep their hands occupied. 

"And when you get the chance..." The blonde sang, her voice trailing off into nothingness so seamlessly. She copied Marlene's pose so they were matching. 

"You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen" They sang in union, the spot lights landing on the three girls along with Lily. All of them had wide smiles as they looked down at their bestfriend, trying to ignore the protests from the professors. "Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine" They continued from their posed position, El adding the 'oh yeah' as it was in the higher keys that the other two couldn't quite reach. 

"You can dance." Marlene sang, moving to point at the redhead who had a slight blush on her cheeks.

"You can jive." Eleanor then pointed at her, winking at her bestfriend.

"Having the time of your life." Delilah then pointed at her, the girl slowly lowered her arm dramatically. 

"See that girl," They sang together. "Watch that scene," They lowered their arms in sync. "Diggin' the dancing queen." The three then skipped their way to Lily, all the students around where clapping and cheering them on.

"You're a teaser, you turn 'em on." Eleanor sang first sitting down on the table by Lily's side, her legs swinging. The redhead was always envious of El's ability to look stunning at every angle and how easy it was for her to look flirtatious as she battered her lashes.

"Leave them burning and then you're gone." Marlene took a seat on the table, squishing Lily between them in a sandwich.

"Looking out for another, anyone will do" Lily swirled around to see Delilah and she was pulled up onto her feet. "You're in the mood for a dance." She sang, spinning the redhead. They all surrounded the birthday girl, their hand forming a point above Lily's head as they walked in a circle around her. 

"And when you get the chance..." The three sang, pulling apart and Eleanor helped Lily onto the Gryffindor table while the other two climbed back onto the Hufflepuff table. "You are the dancing queen," They continued, all of them pointing at her again. "Young and sweet, only seventeen" They were swaying on the spot and Eleanor spun her bestfriend. "Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine." And all the lights went out except Lily's.

"You can dance." Delilah sang, now on one knee as her light flickered on before going off again when Marlene sung.

"You can jive." The blonde on the other table was now on her knee as her light came on then went off once more as it was the next girl's line.

"Having the time of your life." Thankfully, she couldn't see any other students faces otherwise she may have fainted by now. Standing up, the three backed up as all their spot lights appeared again.

"See that girl," They sang together again, pretending to faint because of the beautiful girl. "Watch that scene," The three stood up right again. Eleanor's eyes flickered towards the teachers were she saw Jinky barging her way through. She nodded that way to Marlene who immediately noticed the fuming professor. The barrier of students were crumbling.

"Diggin' the dancing queen..." Delilah and Marlene sang on their own as the blonde rushed forward with a bright smile and grabbed Lily's hand as they began skipping down the table as the music faded. Their spotlight's completely vanished. The other two followed suit. However, they paused. El turned Lily to look at the dark room. In front of Jinky a firework exploded, revealing big bold red and gold letters that said 'HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY LILS'. There was a click of the camera, capturing her awed reaction with the firework in the background. One for the memory books. With that, there was no time to spare as they jumped through the students and into the halls.

"Quickly!" Marlene called, sprinting up the staircase to the next area of their plans. Only a select few knew the location as they sprinted up the multitude of stairs but instead of going to the dorms, they took a left into the corridors. They had to get there before Jinky got them. "Take a right. Now left!" The blonde continued to direct them until they got into a wide hallway with Remus waiting at the end of it. His head snapped up with a smile, a large door way grew and both Marlene and Delilah launched open the doors. 

"Surprise!" A large group of people shouted as Lily entered into the room, everyone she was friends or acquaintances with was there to party. Quickly checking the corridor, the doors shut and from the outside became a cleaners closet again. 

It was hard to distinguish her emotions. Her eyes began to prick with tears as she took everything in. She couldn't believe this. Trying to keep her make up in tact, she turned to her best friend with the widest smile she had ever had. Lily Evans did belong here.

"You did this all for me?" Lily quizzed, not being able to help the joyful tears that trickled down her cheek. 

"Well... We had a lot of help." Eleanor told her, nodding her head to where the marauders stood. They were talking to Aaron and Frank currently but James caught her eye. The redhead mouthed a 'thank you' but, instead of being boastful, he nodded and smiled kindly at her before returning to her conversation. She launched herself at the three girls and they all laughed.

"I love you all s-so much." Her voiced cracked as they held each other tightly, their other friends making their way over. "Did you know about this?" Lily quizzed all four she was sat with at the Gryffindor table.

"Actually, they were the ones who set up this party as well as Dorcas and Edith. Wherever they are." Delilah explained and the redhead paused, wondering how she had gotten so lucky. All of them were truly her family. Lily Evans did belong here.

"Oh, they're sorting out the band." Alice explained, leaning against Mary. "This year was about making memories, right?" She asked and Lily smirked.

"Now let's get you a drink!" Mary called, leading the way to the drinks table. They all followed suit, ready to waste the night away. No one was more excited the Eleanor as she now had a valid reason to drink. 

♱

Tonight was about Lily, so everyone kept in line unlike at Halloween. It was reaching midnight and the party had began to disperse. The whole night was a blur booze, bouncing, and blues. They quite literally danced the night away. It was a night of pure joy. Lily had disappeared half way through to find Jack who, in her words, was 'not my boyfriend but we are exclusive'. None of the girls paid any attention, that was something that Lily had to work through. She had never had a really boyfriend before, the nerves were really getting in the way so this booze really gave her a boost. Fortunately, James stayed distracted. Plus, Sirius hadn't said a word and that's all she needed until she figured out what to tell Marlene. 

As people left, the groups got muddled and a drunk Isadora ended up wandering the corridors alone. This was her fifth year but she still managed to get lost in the grand hallways of Hogwarts. Everything was spinning as she tried to move down the stairs, not so sturdy on the staircase. She was supposed to be with Thomas but he disappeared with Peter and she hadn't seen him since. So she slipped away in search for him but ended up heading back to her dorm. Was it a surprise when she was dragged through a portrait hole? To her it was.

A hand clamped over her mouth as she tried to scream, her legs flailed about to hit her attacker but it was no use. Her back sharply hit the cold stone floor and she let out a loud groan, trying to hold back a whimper. Whoever it was, she would not give them the satisfaction. Vision becoming blotchy and blurred, she was fading out of consciousness. A spot on the back of her head had become hot. Unbeknownst to the girl, the floor beneath her had began to form a puddle of her own blood.

"W-who are you?" Isadora said breathlessly, being winded by the drop. "What do you want?" A dark laughter left her attackers lips as they pulled up her head to face them. Though she couldn't make out his face, Isadora had noticed his black skin and Welsh accent. There was only two people that could be here and she came to the conclusion that only one of them hated her, or her 'kind' as they so pleasantly called muggleborns. Mulciber.

"Look at you, trying to fight back. It's quite cute actually." He said, shoving her back down and a whimper of pain slipped from her lips. "You wasn't my target but I guess you'll do. Since my little excursion to your precious little gardens, I've seen how you've wormed your way into being friends with Eleanor. Makes me sick. I suppose your perfect for each other. Poor little girls that no one will ever love." He spat as he paced the room. "At least I won't get caught for this. I was going to get Eleanor, you know to send some shock waves through the wizarding world but no this is much better. For now, I will prove myself and no one will believe the little mudblood. Then, when that blonde bitch gets disowned - I can gut the whore and be on top. Yes, I will fucking enjoy it too." Mulciber sneered, talking more to himself then the girl who he was attacking.

"Why? Did she reject you too?" Isadora shot back and he froze up. That right there was her answer. He was entitled and had everything handed to him on a diamond crusted platter. Of course he couldn't handle rejection, most boys couldn't. It was a lovely reminder that the men in the wizarding world were just as vile as they were in the muggle world.

"Shut up!" He snapped, pointing his wand at her. Anger was bubbling out of him. "Stupid little bitch. Don't you dare disrespect me like that. I am a pureblood, a part of the sacred twenty eight. And what are you. An orphan." The boy snarled at her, titling her chin up so that he was looking at her.

"How do you know that?" She questioned, gulping slightly. Mulciber had admitted to being her previous attacker but he still used her. A shiver ran down her spine as she hugged herself close. Even after all these years, she had never felt so used. How could she had been so foolish. 

"Your not special. I don't know what fantasy land your living in but someone from the noble house of Black could **never** like you. Its a surprise Eleanor was able to worm her way in but she is a pureblood, unlike you." He accentuated to put force on his words. Shuffling with something in his pockets, the boy pulled out a piece of metal. A blade. "Look at this. You'd never guess how I got this. It will be the perfect cover up whilst pulling your precious group apart. Honestly, coercing the Gryffindor first years was much easier then I predicted. Oh, they were so scared. But now I have this, it is Sirius Black's. Only James can see that he truly changed. I think it would be fun to blame him, don't you?"

"I will defend him." She told him, as if he was completely idiotic. Which, in turn, he was but he had too far ahead. That's the thing though. It was perfect to him, he had never known true friendship and had completely exposed the fragility of the Slytherin group. 

"Who will believe you when everyone else already believes me." But the knife vanished, gone into thin air. The girl smirked. That blade had a tracking spell on it and would come to Sirius on request. Mulciber didn't know that and neither did she. She was just happy that he had no one to blame and she knew his plans. "If only we still had Dippet as headmaster, a muggleborn death would go unwavered. Your lucky. Dare to open your mouth and your dead, all of you. Do you understand me!" He shouted. The girl gulped and nodded instantly as his wand dug into her skin, almost crushing her air ways. She hiccuped, a few tears falling from the pain that coated her body. "Bow to me." Mulciber whispered gruellingly.

"Are you fucking-" She began as pain ran through her entire body. A loud scream emitted from her lips as the tears flooded down her face. Maybe it was pointless to fight back but she wanted to keep her dignity. 

"You heard me mudblood. Bow to me like your supposed to. That's what filth like you are supposed to do, right? Look up at your superior. So I want to see you bow." The sadist spoke, becoming increasingly infuriated by her challenging side. Her and Eleanor definitely had a lot in common. 

"Fuck you." She seethed, spitting out the blood that had trickled into her mouth. In hind sight, she shouldn't have said that but she was trying to buy herself some time. An evil smirk crossed his face as he moved close to her.

"You know, it is truly a shame to ruin a pretty face. Even a mudblood's. I suppose when we win, I could spare you. I'm sure the boys wouldn't mind." He told her with his hand under her chin, his thumb pulling down her lip as he looked over her body. Isadora felt like throwing up, knowing exactly what he meant. "Saying that, Eleanor would be great to keep around. She's got the face and the body but she's a slut. I don't like that. Something tells me your different though. Never even kissed a boy yet, untouched." He carried on, licking his lower lip. "I know a few of the boys would like you. Its a shame really. You could have really been something if you were born a pureblood. Maybe if you learn how to keep that mouth of yours closed, there's something salvageable." The Slytherin smirked eyeing her up hungrily.

"What is wrong with you!" Isadora exclaimed, increasingly feeling less self as his hands stayed on her skin. He was currently crouched at eye level to her. The bile kept fluctuating up and down her throat at his words, feeling truly exposed in this dark corner.

"I'm just preparing you. Isadora." Her name sounded foreign on his tongue as he seethed. "That may not have to be the case. All you have to do is bow." Mulciber confessed, standing up again to tower over her small figure. "Bow." He commanded, impatiently. A red light flashed from his wand and all the limbs in her body felt like they were being shredded, over and over again. She gave in. As she went to bow, she fell down the rabbit hole of darkness. No longer dealing with the pain.


	21. blood & tears

**_chapter twenty one_ **

「 _blood & tears _」

♱

_Society is addicted to playing the victim._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**_WHILST MULCIBER TRIED_** to prove himself, her friends where oblivious to what was happening. Eventually the group left, once the map was checked and the coast was clear, and the Gryffindor's had gathered in the common room, having afters together. The blonde was bugging for a cigarette but she was being good, for Lily's sake. She knew that Sirius had wanted one too as she had to stop him an hour ago before the redhead publicly hexed him into the next century. Peter and James were both stood together, singing 'Go Your Own Way' off of the Fleetwood Mac single that Eleanor had gotten the girl. They had somehow roped Alice into singing with them as Lily was dancing with Sirius, laughing her head off as she was spun around. Mary was sat by the record player, prepared to play the next song, whilst Remus sat in the corner of the sofa with Eleanor's back over his lap as her head was resting on the arm of the chair. The two sat down as they laughed at their friends who couldn't handle their liquor.

Thankfully, Lily had actually enjoyed her night and the girl couldn't have asked for anything more, Eleanor was relieved as Lily needed a good night. For the past month, she had felt rather lonely. She felt like she was helping but deep down she knew that she was pushing Eleanor away which lead to her pushing Marlene away too. Like she had realised a few months ago when the blonde had almost cried in front of her, she had no idea who Eleanor really was and how to help her as Lily felt it was her responsibility. Year after year, El had been by her side and helped her through the worst of things whilst she had sat idly by and let the girl fade away. But when it all started, they were just children. Now they weren't, not really. Eleanor, for one, definitely had lost her childhood many years ago when Lily was still running around trying to avoid getting 'cooties' from boys and sleeping with her favourite teddy: Bunny - who coincidentally was in fact a rabbit. 

"What are you thinking about?" Eleanor asked the boy who was staring off into the distance. He looked down with a frown on his face as he tried to process her words. The girl pulled her bottle to her lips and took a sip, her eyes still trained of his focused face.

"Nothing much, just tired." He lied to her, thinking over what he had done at the party. It was something that he wouldn't anyone over, not even the blonde. He was simply confused.

"You don't have to lie to me, you know that right?" She said, observing his rigid features and clear distorted body language. It was often easy for her to see when someone lied because they had a visible tell, Remus was one of them. He couldn't make eye contact like he usually did.

"I don't even know myself." The boy sighed, taking a sip of his drink. "I just- El, can I ask you something?" He said after a moment and the girl nodded for him to continue. "When you went to the yule ball with Marlene, was that an actual date?" His voice trailed off into almost a whisper.

"What do you mean? I don't quite get what your trying to ask..." Eleanor said, a frown forming on her face as she observed him and the boy licked his lips, unsure of how to ask her.

"I- Well, you know I wouldn't judge you for anything. It's just- I know it's not my place to ask or know but- maybe it would help me out, I suppose. Something happened and- I guess if I knew that you were on a date then I could talk to you- or Marlene. So." Remus expressed unsure of his words, stumbling over each of his sentence. "What I am trying to ask is-"

"If I like girls?" She questioned and the boy simply blinked in response, surprised at her ability to comprehend what he was saying. Remus nodded slowly and a small smile pulled at her lips. "Yes, I do. Boys and girls." El returned with a small giggle as she took a sip of her drink. The boy was quite shocked at her honesty, not many people was honest about such a private thing. Though, the wizarding community claimed to be accepting there was still stigma against same sex relationships from both muggleborns and purebloods as one had the muggle world prejudices and the others wanted an heir to their family. Since Eleanor was the eldest, it was expected from her just like it was expected from Sirius. So, to Remus it was surprising and he pinned it to the alcohol. But in truth, she didn't care. And she had never been more fortunate to be able to not care. At the end of the day, if her father didn't except her, she could move on with the money that her mother left her. Nothing would change, she didn't have a family anymore - not after Ada's current choices.

"How did you know?" Remus asked carelessly, the alcohol was clouding his judgement. She let out a small laugh and the boy blushed lightly.

"I mean- looking back, it was slightly obvious. But I never really knew until Ma- someone told me that they were. It started to make me think and went through the whole confusion of maybe I'm lying to myself and I'm straight or maybe I've been lying to myself and I'm actually a lesbian. I still think so sometimes. Honestly Remus, most people don't know and some people never know. It is what you think is right. No one can say what you are. It is better to question now and realise your straight then to go until your sixty without knowing." She explained and he listened intently. "Why do you ask? Has something happened between you and Delilah?"

"Nothing. Don't get me wrong, she's amazing but-" He sighed, rubbing his face. "I guess I spent so long thinking about us together and now that it is happening, I'm not sure that we are right together."

"Don't get me wrong, I love Delilah and want her to be happy but if you think that your feelings might change if you stay, I'm going to tell you this now, they won't." She explained to him, her hand finding his as she twirled the ring on his finger. "Maybe talk to her, I don't see you two together much."

"I see her everyday, actually. We usually sit in the gardens or- erm- down the abandoned corridor." He coughed out, causing the girl to look from his hands to his face as a smirk pulled at her lips, one he already had displayed proudly.

"Remus Lupin!" Eleanor gasped and her jaw dropped. The bespectacled boy had left the singing duo and slumped onto the sofa as El had moved her legs for him before she placed them back over him. James rested an arm over his leg as he tried to tune into their conversation.

"What?!" The boy expressed innocently but the smirk was still very prevalent on his face. "Look, even you caught get your hands off me." He teased before she dropped his hand onto her stomach.

"Like I said, you have been spending too much time with Sirius." She shot back, making the boy smile even more.

"Someone say my name?" A voice called, hopping over the back of the sofa. Sirius sat on the back of the sofa, just over the blonde. Her eyes flickered up to him and she smiled. Peter had sat on the arm next to James, facing El as he too had become intrigued about their conversation.

"I was talking about you, not to you." El told him, sticking out her tongue childishly at him. He rolled her eyes at and ruffled up her hair up, causing her to scowl before they all laughed lightly. There was a click and the five of them turned to look at the redhead with her new camera out. Eleanor smiled at the three girls crowded around the fire, waiting for the polaroid photo to show. She would add the potion that made it live later.

"Aw look," Lily said, showing the picture to Alice and Mary who both smiled widely. "Elle and her boys." Her words caused the boy to her left to scoff loudly.

"We are not her boys." James spoke in a matter of fact tone as he crossed his arms and outed like a toddler. The other three laughed lightly before one spoke up.

"Yeah. We are." Remus told him with a smile.

"Yeah. We definitely are." Sirius added, just after him with another bright smile that matched Remus'.

"They're right, James. We are." Peter said, patting the frowning boy on the shoulder as the four of them laughed lightly.

"Fine." He huffed. "Yeah we are." James spoke as a smile plagued his face. She ruffled his hair like he often did, causing him to punch her shoulder playfully as she laid back down. The three girls joined them, sitting on the floor near them.

"Leo Corde!" They heard someone shout from the corridor before two bodies burst through the door. No one had time to react when Marlene and Delilah came bounding into the common room. The curly haired girl looked straight at Eleanor and Remus before looking back to Marlene. "Isadora hasn't come back!" The blonde told them in a panic. El immediately shot up and hurried over to her, the others being slowed by the amount of alcohol they had had.

"Woah. Breath, Marlene. What's happened?" She asked, grabbing the girls arm lightly as she searched her face.

"Well, she was supposed to leave with Thomas and he got back an hour ago. Maybe she took a detour but this isn't like her, not after last time." The blonde explained, overcome by worry. Tears had formed in Marlene's eyes that she tried to blink away but they fell down her cheeks instead.

"Wait, what happened last time?" Lily asked, standing up worriedly.

"She stayed here over Christmas and well- Somebody attacked her in the gardens." El told the redhead who went wide eyed, so did the others.

"And you didn't tell me! Eleanor what the fuck? That's not something you keep a secret from all of us. If she's been targeted then it would be handy to know!" Lily shouted at the girl and everyone had fell silent.

"Because she told me not to. Plus, it isn't exactly something I can talk to you about when the person that had tried to drug her afterwards was the boy you constantly defend, even though he clearly doesn't give a flying fuck about you." El retorted, once again silencing the group as Lily almost chocked on air because of that information. She knew exactly who the girl was talking about. Severus. The only one advanced enough to make such a potion. "I had been meaning to confront him but i haven't seen him around school in months, I'm pretty sure he avoids me." She said, making the boys smirk because they knew exactly why. "That's not important now, i'll talk to you later about it."

"Yeah, like everything else you promised to tell me." Lily shot back under her breath but the blonde still heard her. The blonde frowned, letting Lily know that she had in fact heard her, but she knew it was the alcohol that left her lip loose.

"Right. We'll pair up and split off. Meet up at the hospital wing in an hour if you don't find anything, she may already be there." The girl stated, bringing the conversation back on track. "Me and Re-"

"I'll go with Remus!" Delilah interjected with a wide smile, going over to him to help him off the sofa. With a blink of her eye, El huffed before continuing.

"Okay, you two head East and look around the 2 lower floors and the east tower." She explained and the two disappeared. "Lily and Marlene do the same but go West." Eleanor advised and they headed out. "James, Peter. Take the upper floors on the West and the dungeons." They headed out together, hooting because of their intoxication. "Mary and Alice, do the same on the East, as well as the gardens surrounding." She knew that the two girls would be the best if there was a fight, even in their disorderly state. That left her and Sirius. "We'll check passageways, small nuggets around here and the kitchens." El told him but a smile just grew on his face as he jumped up.

"I'll be right back!" He called, sprinting up to the staircase to the dorms. Her face dropped in shock.

"Sirius! What are you doing? We have to go!" She shouted before rolling her eyes and chasing after him. Once she reached their room, she spotted him stood over his bed staring at a piece of parchment. Quickly moving to his side, he mouth dropped. It was a complete map of Hogwarts, with places she never knew existed. "Sirius. Did you make this?" El asked, stunned by the magic used in the piece.

"Yeah. Me, James, Peter and Moony. I mean Remus." He said proudly, scanning the names across the board.

"Moony? Is that his nickname?" Eleanor said with a light giggle. "A little obvious don't you think?" She added, also searching the names. Most students were clustered in their dorms but there was an odd few out and about, like Dorcas and Rabastan doing their prefect rounds together or Adelaide out in the old abandoned classroom that she showed El. If Isadora wasn't a priority right now, she would be pretty transfixed on what she was doing there.

"Well, we all have our nicknames. Prongs, Padfoot, Wormtail, and Moony." Sirius explained and she let out a soft giggle at the ridiculous names.

"Why? Oh-" She said as something connected in her head. "Is it something to do with your animagus form?" The girl asked as it seemed to make more sense to her, for some bizarre reason.

"How did you-" He stopped his watch momentarily before he realised who he was talking to. A smile broke out on his lips. "Yes, Peter is a rat, James is a stag, and I'm a dog." He answered quietly before she burst into a fit of laughter. "Hey! It's not like I'm a golden retriever. Think more like a big, shaggy, black dog." The boy tried to defend himself as he returned back to the map.

"Wait, did you say James is a stag?" Eleanor quizzed, raising a brow at him. "Wasn't there at the graveya-"

"Look, there. Sixth floor corridor, in one of the abandoned cupboards." He interrupted pointing at Isadora's name. "That's strange. When we came back earlier, my blade was gone. I had a locator spell on it for that reason specifically, it was pretty well hidden as well, and it was in that room. Thankfully, It comes back when I say." Sirius explained, looking towards the panicked girl. "Let's go."

The pair raced across the stairs, waiting impatiently as the stairs moved to the next destination. Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest, silently suffocating her. She had no idea what to expect. There was a blade there at one point, she knew that for sure.

"Why the hell do you even have a knife, at school?" Eleanor questioned as they made their way into the fifth floor corridor.

"Because I received it from my brother on my birthday and I forgot to take it home. I hid it for a reason." He explained to her, pushing the doors open as they passed through to the staircase.

"Obviously not well enough. How do you even lose that?" She huffed, jogging up the spiralled staircase.

"I'm not sure. I check it every night, just in case. I don't want to get expelled. It's not exactly something I can parcel up and ship to Euphemia, is it?" Sirius retorted as he checked the map again, seeing if the girl had moved or not. She hadn't.

"Sorry. I promised to keep her safe and I haven't done a very good job." Eleanor stressed, turning towards the abandoned cupboard that had been locked with a steal rod so that Isadora couldn't escape. In a matter of seconds, she had the door open which revealed the unconscious girl that only had bruises and scrapes on her face. Dropping to her side, Eleanor examined the girl as she shook her lightly, trying to see if she was responsive whilst trying not to worsen her current condition. "We have to get her to Madame Pomfrey." She told him, checking Isadora to see if she had any serious bleeding. With a nod, he stepped forward and carefully picked up Isadora. The blonde lead the way through the corridors, checking the map every now and again to stay clear of Filch and other prefects that they didn't know. They took a short cut, advised by Sirius, and was there in no time.

Bursting through the doors, their grande entrance startled the matron who came tumbling out of her office. Sirius placed the girl down on a spare bed as Pomfrey came over, ready to examine and question the two on what had happened.

"She didn't show up in her dorm but she had decided to walk back on her own so Marlene came to help us search. We found her, locked in the cupboard on sixth floor like this." El explained upon being asked. The matron began to observe Isadora to see what was wrong with her.

"How long has she been gone?" Pomfrey questioned, becoming increasingly concerned at the girl's state.

"I don't know. I last saw her two or three hours ago." Eleanor told the woman, just wanting to know if he was okay. "What's wrong with her?" She asked, holding Isadora's hand because she didn't want something to happen again.

"She's been hexed. With what, I don't know. Give me a few minutes. Can you and Mr Black step outside, it's not good to crowd her in this precarious situation." Madame Pomfrey said but the blonde didn't want to leave. She looked down at the girl. Her eyes welled at the sight of her. Another one she had let down and failed to keep safe, just like Adelaide. It was just another relapse of promises that she was unable to keep. The girl had failed. Again and again and again. Whatever it was, she had failed to protect her. A hand fell on her upper arm and the boy escorted her into the corridor where she fell against the wall and to the floor.

Senses smeared by her alcohol, she felt the tears threatening to surface once more. Her head falling into her hands as Sirius sat beside the blonde. A silence settled over them. But Eleanor didn't let the tears fall. No, she enjoyed the comfort of the darkness for once. Instead of being torturous, it was gentle and peaceful. As she looked back up, her head came to rest on his shoulder as he took her hand in his, just like the night before. And just like that night, his thumb caressed the beck of her hand. She closed her eyes once more, enjoying the darkness.

They stayed like that until Madame Pomfrey emerged and ushered the two back inside. The two stood nervously around the bedside of the girl as they waited for the matron to speak. She looked awfully worried and was currently shutting the curtains of Isadora's section.

"I'm going to need you to gather your friends and start explaining everything that has happened because this is incredibly serious." The woman explained, causing Eleanor's face to drop. "Professor Dumbledore and the heads of houses are all on their way. Somebody has used the cruciatus curse on Ms. Marshall."  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"A party? How do you even know where the room of requirement is?" Professor Quibble, the Ravenclaw head of house asked with a strong frown. He was the most furious out of the group of teachers and his house had nothing to do with this, neither did his subject of Astronomy. All of them were silent, their head hung low since they didn't want to indoctrinate each other. It seemed to be unneeded though. Dumbledore had most of what he needed to know.

Eleanor fidgeted with her mother's necklace, she was only wearing it for such a special occasions. There was a sharp pain in her head and she flinched lightly. The boy next to her had seemed to notice as he was looking towards her worriedly. Once the pain had faded, her eyes shot up to meet Dumbledore's who seemed thrown off by the blonde but said nothing.

"Professor Quibble, it's quite alright." The head master spoke calmly, standing up from his desk to join them. "They are teenagers after all. In my youth, I found myself wanting to rebel and enjoy my years. Of course, I was sneaking in and out of the restricted section." He said mindlessly, looking between the teachers as if he was appealing to them. "I do have one question though. Ms Westbrook, how was it that you were able to find Ms Marshall so easily?" Dumbledore asked as if he already knew the answer. She watched him intently, observing his stance and for any other tell. The man already knew.

"You already know, sir." Eleanor replied, guessing that he was a legilimens. That is the only way that he could possibly know.

"Very well. If you wouldn't mind escorting the children back to their dorms." Dumbledore said to the heads of houses who all jumped into action. "Ms Westbrook, a moment please. I'm sure Mr Black won't mind waiting to escort you back." The headmaster spoke nonchalantly and the boy nodded before stepping out. "It is not often I come across occlumens, especially one as skilled as you. Believe me, I have been practicing the art of Legilimency for over a hundred years and only one had put up such an impressive fight. Tell me, Eleanor, did you even try to block your mind from my attempt?"

"No, sir. My father has tried to teach me before but his friend couldn't get through." The blonde explained as he smiled kindly at her. "I suppose it's a gift."

"Yes, I suppose so. Both your mother and her sister could do the same." He told her, causing the girl's brow to raise slightly.

"Her sister?" Eleanor questioned, wanting to know more.

"Yes, Aurora Knightley. Surely your mother talked about her. They were very close." He spoke but the girl shook her head. His eyes flickered to his clock. "That'd be a conversation for another night. Perhaps next week? For now, get some rest. I'm sure that Isadora will want to speak to you when she wakes."

  
With a nod of her head, she exited the office and headed down the steps. Sirius was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. He was exhausted and it was obvious to the blonde. Unfortunately the perfect night had turned into a complete disaster.

"Come on. You need to get to bed." Ellie said to the boy who smiled, joining her side as they walked through the desolate halls with a note of excuse from McGonagall.

"Yeah and you don't? Did you even sleep last night?" The boy quizzed with a singular raised brow but the seriousness was melted away with his dazzling smile.

"No but you look exhausted. I, however, am looking absolutely fine." She told him and the boy let out a bark of laughter.

"You could do with looking in a mirror." Sirius said as she scoffed at him with a smile plaguing her face right after.

"Yeah, I'd still be looking better then you." El shot back with a cheeky smile. The boy dramatically grasped his heart, feigning a some kind of heart break.

"Wow, Ella. You know how to break a heart." He said, pretending to brush away tears before he let out a small laugh with her. "You should try complementing me sometimes."

"Oh yeah? Well, Sirius. You are the most beautiful man that I have ever met." She expressed dramatically, lifting her hand to her forehead as she pretended to faint.

"How kind, you do know how to flatter me." Sirius said with a smirk. They ascended the moving staircases to the common room as they spoke.

"What can I say, I love doing my bit for charity." She shot back with a matching smirk, walking backwards to see his jaw drop. The door swung open after she muttered the password and the two walked in together.

"Real nice, Ella. Real nice." He spoke slowly as they walked into the pitch black room. The sound of bare feet on stone came running down the stairs and Mary emerged from the boys staircase with a smile. She was in one of Remus' old shirts and her hair was thrown up into a large bun, yet to put her bonnet on.

"There you two are. James said we should all stay together and Lily actually agreed. Come on." The quidditch player said before turning on her heels and heading back up.

"Unlock the hatch, I'll join you in a minute." The blonde told him and they parted ways into the separate staircases. She stripped of her uncomfortable clothes and slipped on the hoodie that clouded her scents with ginger, amber, and cedar wood. Although the cologne had faded from the amount of time she had kept the hoodie. She grabbed a pair of pyjama shorts and slipped them on before going to brush her teeth, wiping her makeup off.

It wasn't long until she was slipping through her hatch and walking towards there's. The winter weather blistered her bare skin, causing goosebumps to ghost her skin. She shivered harshly as reached their side of the roof, pulling the small door open. Below sat all of them, crowded on Sirius' bed. To be honest, she had expected them to be sleeping. Once she had lowered herself into the room, the girl realised that both James and Lily had passed out on the same bed. The bespectacled boy had been comforting her.

"Merlin, El. You don't have to freeze us all." Peter groaned as he got up, heading towards his bed. "We have a door for a reason." He added with a cheeky smile.

"Yes and you have a mouth that you don't need to use but here we are." She retorted as he face planted his bed, overtaken by exhaustion to even muster a sarcastic response. He switched off his light and in a couple of seconds the group could hear his snores.

"Alice and Mary, you've got the spare bed." Remus yawned as he got up, heading to his own. "Night." He called as he curled up under his blanket.

"Yeah, goodnight." Mary responded with a polite smile, one Remus had returned before getting in bed, and she dragged Alice to bed as she was falling asleep sat up. The blonde raised a brow at the only left up and he stretched and yawned too. The boy shuffled off the bed and laid on an enlarged pillow and covered himself in a blanket.

"What are you doing?" Eleanor whispered to him. His once closed eyes flickered open to her and he was equally confused.

"Being a gentlemen." Sirius replied in a quiet tone. She rolled her eyes at him and waved him over to her.

"You'll freeze." The girl countered, slipping under his sheets and held up the covers for him to join her. Of course, he had a devilish smile on his face as he laid next to her. "Don't look like that, I don't exactly want to wake up and deal with a dead boy." She said but his smile stayed put.

"If you wanted to share a bed with me, all you've got to do is ask, darling." The girl had never been so thankful for the darkness then she had today. Her cheeks had quickly become hot as she looked away from him. Suddenly, he let out a gasp, almost startling the girl. "Did I just make the Eleanor Westbrook blush?" He said and the girl let out a low laugh but she could sense his smugness from there. Though, in retrospect, she was pretty close to him. When she turned her head, the tip of their noses was less then an inch away.

"Your such a twat." Eleanor told him, shaking her head lightly.

"Yes but I'm your twat." He said cheekily and there was a pause.

"That was the corniest shit that I have ever heard." The blonde giggled as she pushed his head away from him. Both of them let out another laugh as they stared at the ceiling. "I am so telling James that you said that."

"Don't you dare." He scoffed, narrowing his eyes at her but she just raised her eyes challengingly at him.

"Oh yeah, like your going to stop me." She shot back, turning on her side so that her body was facing him. The boy just smiled like a school boy as her eyes fluttered shut.

Not another word was spoken as sleep had snatched the blonde almost instantly. Tonight, Sirius laid awake staring at the ceiling. He did not have a good feeling about what had gone down and knew that was only going to get worse. Whoever had gotten a hold of his blade was in the know and he had become increasingly worried that Regulus could have something to do with this. The pair had been rocky since he had left home but this was something else. Could he take there recent feud this far? That's was the thing, he didn't know but that was kept him up.

The only thing that seemed to calm him was the soft breathing of the girl next to him. He listened through the silence, it was comforting to be so close to someone when everyone usually stayed so far away. And as he closed his eyes, he wasn't alone in the darkness...


	22. nothing's fair in war

**_chapter twenty two_ **

「 _nothing's fair in war_ 」

♱

_The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _"MS. EMMELL, PLEASE_** excuse me. May I please borrow Mr Black and Miss Westbrook." The stern voice of Professor McGonagall spoke after she had knocked on the door, interrupting their alchemy lesson. Immediately looking up, Eleanor's eyes shot to her three friends who held a similar look of worry. With a nod of her head, the stood up and were told to collect their things. "Quickly. Keep up." She said, storming ahead of them. They followed in silence, unsure of what was to come. Occasionally, she caught eyes with the boy beside her but all he could do was offer a comforting smile as he was equally on edge.

Everything became more clear when they reached the corridor of the Hospital Wing. It had been three days since the incident and Isadora was yet to wake. Auror's and ministry officials had swarmed the castle because of the unforgivable spell used. Along with the current predicament of muggleborn and muggle attack, they were well in reason to believe that this could be related to the self proclaimed deatheaters.

Once they had entered, everything became silent as the adults turned their attention to the two teens. McGonagall came to a halt and turned to face them, just outside of the closed off section.

"Miss Marshall is awake. She has refused to speak and has only requested the presence of you both." The woman explained. Slight confusion laced between them as they wondered why, especially Sirius as he had never spoken to the girl before. But they couldn't question McGonagall as she had pulled back the curtain and ushered them through.

There sat Isadora, awake, paled and saddened but healthy nonetheless. In an instant, Eleanor was by her side and pulled the Hufflepuff into a tight hug, one she returned immediately. They stayed like that for a few extra moments until the blonde shuffled back, taking hold of her hand. Sirius hovered in the corner, his arms crossed over his chest as he stood there like a statue. No emotion. Just like he had been taught until he was sixteen.

"What happened?" The blonde asked, barely audible as she scanned Isadora's face. Not a word was said. After a moment, she pointed to her ear and then to the curtain. El's eyes followed and she understood what she meant. Standing up, she pulled out her wand and whispered "Silencio." Creating a dome around them so they could talk in private.

"When I was walking back to the dorms, I was completely dazed and practically out of my mind. Someone grabbed me and I hit my head when I was thrown in the room." Isadora began to talk as the blonde sat on her bedside, holding the girls had once more. "Listen Eleanor, I can't tell them what happened. He will- it's you. They want you. They are trying to use me to get to you." She spouted, tightening her grip on the blonde's hand.

"What- Isadora. Who? It's okay. I can handle them." She replied, frowning at the statement but Isadora shook her head. There was far more to it then what Mulciber had said. That was the problem, she hadn't figured out the connections yet.

"No. They did this to prove themselves." She gestured to her current state. "I am the start of more. You, Eleanor, are the end to all of this. They're trying to worm in. They are waiting as they believe that you'll get disowned. Once you don't have your father on your side, they want to attack." The girl explained, looking away momentarily. Eleanor went to speak but was cut off again. "They're after all of us. We're the only threat to them." She continued as her eyes flickered to Sirius. "He- They had your blade, Sirius. You were going to be framed for doing this." Isadora told him in a shaky breath, causing El's head to snap that way. "He told me that only James would defend you - that he is the only one that would believe you, even if I defended you." She told him. There was a faint twinkle in his eye, something Eleanor had picked up on. His jaw was clenched but he nodded at her: thankful. Then, he was like stone once more. "You can't go after them, if they find out that I talked then we all go down. If it's not them, another will take their place. I'm sure that I was supposed to be dead." Eleanor eyes fluttered shut as she tried to process all of this. Sucking in a deep breath, she knew that Isadora had a point. All they could do is plot their own backfire. She had an idea who had done this and that meant that they would get away with it. They all came from powerful families that were all well respected and in the courts. Even if they were expelled, they would not be sentenced to Azkaban. That meant a huge target on all of their backs.

"Who was it?" Eleanor whispered, looking the girl in the eyes for answers. "Please, Isadora. If we can't tell them, you need to tell me. Us. Now more then ever, we need each other to survive this." She explained but Isadora froze. It was like she couldn't say his name, even though she wanted to. Looking down at her hands, they were shaking profusely. She opened her mouth but no words came out, confusing the two in the room.

"M-M-" Isadora stuttered out, it was like his name had been cut from her mind. "U-U-L-C-C-C-" Eyes going wide, the blonde knew exactly who it was. She tensed, placing her hand on Isadora to stop her from stressing.

"You tell them that you never saw your attackers face. They'll do a search but I'm sure he has cleared his wand of it's past spells. I will do some snooping. A plan. I'll talk it over with the others. Now, it's in our own hands." El said which Sirius nodded at, exiting to round their friends. Before she could leave, Isadora clamped a hand on her arm.

"We can't- Eleanor if he finds out." A tear slipped down her cheek, not wanting her friends to get hurt over herself. There was a mutual understanding in that sense but El could not sit there and do nothing. She knew if they didn't retaliate then this would get worse. They would be walked over.

"Then let him. When they are all informed and are willing to stand against them, then they have no chance. In unity, we are strong. In division, we fall." The blonde told Isadora, pulling her into a hug before heading out to help Sirius round up their friends. It was obvious that the people outside wanted to know what was discussed but Eleanor slipped away without a fuss.

Revenge. It was a sweet poison that enthralled the girl. She wanted it. She needed it. She was completely intoxicated by it. Revenge. Oh, she could not wait to make him pay. There was a certain thrill that rushed through her body as she raced down the corridors. Revenge. Mulciber would pay. They all would and she would enjoy every second.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


Every last one of them, bar Isadora, was cramped into the boys Gryffindor dorm room. All of them: Remus, Peter, James, Lily, Marlene, Delilah, Thomas, Alice, Mary, Frank, Aaron, Jack, Dorcas, Edith, Sirius, and Eleanor. There was a harsh silence opposed on them after the blonde had explained everything. Reality had sunk in. None of them wanted this but they knew there was no choice. They had been thrown into the deep end, going to fight a war that the adults had started and dragged them in to.

"How do we know that we can trust everyone in this room?" Peter asked, looking around at the many faces that looked as sullen as him. What seemed to catch her attention was the fact that he was staring at the two Slytherin's that Eleanor had rounded.

"Why are you looking at me?" Dorcas snapped, her heading shooting towards the smaller boy who gulped. She had forgotten the stupid house tension existed here. What did they expect to happen when they grouped a bunch of kids and labelled them all since the day they walked in? Total ludicrous if you asked Eleanor.

"You are in Slytherin." James defended his friends actions but he didn't dare look Dorcas in the face. A scoff escaped the -usually well preserved- girl's lips. Then there was an unsettlement in the air.

"If you have a problem with anyone in this room, then you can leave. Simple. You can learn to trust unless you are unwilling too. All of this is just bias' that have shoved down your throat from being at this school. Just because they are Slytherin, doesn't mean that they side with the minority that are in the wrong." Ellie came to the aid, being careful not to slate the school that all of these teens clearly loved. Since she had an outside perspective, El had come to realise the multitude of flaws in this school that most of them didn't seem to realise.

None of them moved. Though, James seemed to be giving her a glare. He did not like being wrong, not one bit.

"But Ellie, they are ruthless. If we're supposed to be on the 'good' side, how do we keep up? People are being murdered..." Lily spoke up, obviously anxious by the whole idea. All of them were, even Eleanor.

"You do what yo can to stay alive." Was her only answer. They knew exactly what she meant. "That's your choice though. If your not willing to do so then..." She trailed off, not wanting to finish this sentence.

Kill or be killed. That was the saying. It was true. The opposing side did not care. They would do anything to win so they indeed had to match that or they'd all be dead. Though the idea of killing may not be the most appealing, Eleanor knew that the quickest way to Lily was through those that she loved. That girl would do anything to protect them and she really meant anything. But at the moment, Lily would not admit that as it was an overwhelming concept to take something as precious as a life. This was different. It was indeed a defence. They wouldn't have to kill anybody now but if this wasn't solved by the time they left -which was highly unlikely- then there wouldn't be much choice on the matter. Lily knew that. It wasn't so much the fact that she had to harm someone but the fact that she would spend her early adulthood fighting instead of doing everything that she had once dreamed of. As she looked around, the girl knew that the possibility of them all making this out alive was slim. Then she thought back to the tea leaves. Her chances were unlikely. For a second, she froze over in fear. What if she had to fight to the very last breath?

"Ellie. We could not. How could you think like that? It's so wrong- How would we be any different?" Lily retaliated in a moment of hysteria. That was the thing, she did not want to come to grips with reality.

"This isn't one of those muggle films, Lily! There is no distinction between 'good' and 'evil'. We all have a bit of both inside us and we walk that line constantly. One 'wrong' action could save many down the line. You can't isolate a single action. I'm not saying that you should murder anybody. All I'm saying is, if it comes down to it: our lives or theirs because of some attack they planned, you have to be prepared to chose the latter. Outside of Hogwarts, there is no mercy or punishment. The people we face are from some of the most powerful families in the wizarding world. You get murdered and they get away with it, easily. Nothing is fair and you'll go crazy trying to sort between the two." Eleanor snapped back and the redhead recoiled, knowing that the girl was correct. "Whether you like it or not, this is just the beginning. A war is coming. You have to choose. Even when there is no good or evil, there is always to opposing sides and the middle men. Either way you'll roped in, probably caught in the crossfire..." There was something strange about how the blonde explained things. It was as if she was prepared for this fight. Deep down, she was. Maybe she was oblivious to this fact but there hadn't been a point in the blonde's life where she wasn't fighting something. Nothing scared her more than her own demons. War could only take her away from them, she prayed that a final fight would set her free. One more and all of it was over. No Eleanor equalled no demons, for her and everyone around her. In her mind, she knew that she was better off dead.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"Have you talked to her yet?" Georgia asked, joining Eleanor as they walked down the corridor towards the transfiguration classroom.

"I have been a bit busy. In case you have forgotten, Violet hates me and has been avoiding me like the plague since Marlene bust her face. And scouting her out isn't a main priority of mind." She explained to the brunette who almost seemed offended by her words. A hand gripped tightly on her bicep and pulled the blonde out of view and out of hearing.

"You only have until April. The day she is of age is when her father will marry her off. Then she won't be returning to Hogwarts. I know this is a lot to ask, especially because you don't like her but she is all I have. You must understand..." The brunette pleaded with big puppy eyes. Eleanor ran a hand through her hair out of pure stress. This was not the time.

"Fine. Get her to go to the clock tower tomorrow night at eight, I presume she will still converse with you in private." El said, knowing she had to just get it out of the way. This was on her. She had already agreed to do this. Once Georgia solidified the plan, the girl's left separately.

Upon arriving at the class, she was sat by Mary when a note was placed on her desk. Her eyes flickered up to meet those of Rabastan Lestrange who was looking as stone like as usual. He gave the blonde a polite nod before heading to his seat like it was nothing.

We need to talk. Owlery. Six O'Clock.  
\- _R.A.B_

Itwasinstinct for her to roll her eyes. Too much meddling in problems that weren't her own. Honestly, she had never figured out why so many people come to her for help. She couldn't even fix her own problems, never mind anyone else's. But, of course, she would go. There was only a handful of times in which she had spoken to Regulus before and they were all in regards to his brother. However, she could take a small guess and believe it could be to do with recent events.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


As everyone feasted, Clementine had curled up under a tree as she let the tears fall down her cheeks. She had been sat there for most of the day, avoiding her peers out of pure embarrassment. To be honest, she didn't know why she even tried but it had resulted in her shame. She couldn't believe what had happened because she trusted Adelaide.

_"Hey! Ada. Can I talk to you?" Clem asked, approaching the table that was surrounded by those who had teased her since her first day at Hogwarts. Her knew friends seemed fairly amused by the idea. When the brunette eventually looked up, she had a very distasteful pout on her lips. It was like a shot to the heart. What had she done to deserve such a treatment?_

_"What is it?" She replied, looking back down at her food and taking a bite. Not even remotely interested in the conversation._

_"In private." Clem said, side eyeing the boys around her who were observing her every move. Like she was prey._   
  


Then everything got worse. She didn't get up from that seat. No. She ridiculed her. Called her names. Looked down upon her because she was friends with Emmeline. It was strange though, she had been more than willing to befriend her before Christmas. What had changed - she didn't know.

All she could think about was the complete venom behind her words. They made her sick and shiver to the bone. Then the tears streamed at an even quicker pace. It wasn't like she could tell the others, all she would get is a 'told you so lecture'.

So here she sat, completely and utterly alone. The cold winters eve, nipping at every inch of exposed skin as she tried to process everything. Clementine had fallen under the illusion that things were different between them, that once in her life she was special. That quickly became another disappointment. No matter what she did, something always went wrong and she was tired. So very tired.

"Clementine?" A voice called after her, she froze on the spot. Her eyes flickered over to find a boy hovering over her. Rowan. She hadn't seen him since the ball.

"W-What do you want?" She stuttered out, trying to dry her eyes as he joined the girl's side.

"To see how you are. I know that you have every right to hate me after what happened but I was not in the right head space. I'm sorry for doing that." He explained shakily, not quite sure of his own words. Clem just smile at him and nodded.

"I'm fine, thanks. I just had a stupid fight with a friend, that's all." She told him. The two didn't speak anymore, just enjoyed each other's presence. It was calm but chilling. Peaceful. 


	23. solve this for me

**_chapter twenty three_ **

「 _solve this for me_ 」

♱

_One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 _ **DURING DINNER, ELEANOR** _had disappeared after having a small bite to eat. None of them noticed as they were far too focused on themselves and the low conversation between each other. Except Sirius. He seemed hyper aware of her presence, all the time. It was slowly driving him crazy because the boy knew why she caught his attention but could never find the words to describe the feeling. So, when she slipped out without reason, he knew she was off to do something that she didn't want the rest of them to know about - or just Lily. People had their tells and for Eleanor, it was when she kept quiet about whatever she was doing. You see, she had done that a lot recently so the boy had quickly become aware - usually because they were both sneaking away together to smoke or get high or both. This time it was something completely different and he gathered that he had something to do with it as she was far less chatty with him then usual. Though, he would check the map later to make sure she was okay. Lily had a knack of running her mouth when she was drunk. 

For past three months, the nights had been nothing but blistering winds and heavy snow or rain. It was weird for the night to be so eerily perfect, completely still. There was nothing to distract her now, though. Usually the tingling sensation of her cold hands or the pricking of the harsh wind was enough to temporarily take over her thoughts as she walked but now she had no such luck and was thinking over anything that could possibly happen. After what Isadora had told her, this may have not been the best idea but Regulus wouldn't hurt her, right? Then again, she wasn't quite sure. Mulciber had always been spiteful and egotistical -it seemed to come as a package deal for a pureblood boy- yet she had never thought that he would use an unforgivable curse, especially at Hogwarts. He was way out of his depths. His dense arrogance would get him caught or killed. But it had really put things into perspective. Those boys had grown up. They were ready for war, unlike her and her friends. That was about to change.

"Regulus?" She called up the tower, hesitant to walk in. Walking up a few steps, she stopped in her tracks after hearing the kicking of rocks from higher up the tower. Someone was definitely here. She sucked in a deep breath before venturing further up. Stood at the very top was a hooded figure, staring out across the barren grasslands that surrounded the school. When they turned around, they lowered there hood to reveal that they were in fact the youngest Black brother. "What do you want?" Eleanor asked him, already ready to leave.

"Well, that's no way to greet an old friend." He said with the signature Black smirk, a hint of mischief dazzled in his grey eyes. The girl had forgotten how alike the two brothers were. It was slightly unnerving actually.

"Please. An old friend would have greeted me when I arrived." She countered, only making that smirk of his grow. The boy let out a small chuckle before turning back to staring at the grounds of Hogwarts. God, the dramatics. How could she forget. She thought Sirius was bad but his family was far worse. "So, what do you want?"

"I caught wind of the incident. How is she?" Regulus questioned, not daring to look at the blonde. For a second, she wanted to burst into a fit of laughter. Someone who practically worshipped Voldemort was asking how a muggleborn was. It was peculiar but if she played her cards right then she may find out.

"Isadora-" The boy flinched at the sound of the Hufflepuff's name. This had got a lot more interesting. He was avoiding her eye on purpose. She couldn't do this. The girl shook her head and let out a small sigh. "Why do you care? Regulus, be honest." A silence fell upon them as the boy clenched his jaw, another person that didn't want to accept their reality.

"I don't." He spat. The blonde was not convinced in the slightest. This was the perfect opportunity to dig into what he truly wanted. Though the Black family was very good at hiding their emotions and sedating them. Unfortunately they never got round to love, not a frequent feeling that the elite experienced or dwelt upon. By the small glimmer in his eyes, she could tell that he did care. A crush, a friendship, or even a first love: he felt something for her, even if he didn't want to admit that.

"A muggleborn. Don't tell me that mummy's favourite son has fallen for everything that the family has stood against for centuries. I am surprised. Shocked, really." She taunted with a sick smirk on her face, it was something she couldn't help. The way her words could rile someone up until they did something they would regret was her guilty pleasure. Maybe it shouldn't be so easy to get under people's skin then.

"Shut up!" Regulus snapped, turning to face her. His eyes had darkened significantly. Just like that, she had gotten to him. Letting out a small laugh, he was getting more heated as she dragged this out.

"Why? All I said was that I'm surprised. Now, I would expect this from Sirius but you... The boy that basically has a shrine to Voldemort-" She continued but was cut off by Regulus, who looked slightly panicked.

"Don't say his name." He demanded, stepping forward to intimidate her but she just let out a giggle.

"Oh please. Scared of a name? Even if he shows his face because I dared to speak his name, what is he going to do? Kill me?" Eleanor spoke, almost crying from laughter. To say the boy was shocked was an understatement. Never had he encountered anyone quite like Eleanor Westbrook. She really lived up to the reputation of her name, she went beyond that. It unnerved him. No one should be so fearless. He could tell she wasn't joking.

"You overestimate your power. You'd be nothing without you father. Just as pathetic as your friends." He tried to argue, intimidated by her carelessness. They say being fearless is for the reckless but Regulus had a sense that it was freeing, more powerful because your scared of that bit of danger that hold you back. And everyday, Eleanor let go a little more. The fear slowly unravelled and left her stronger then before.

"That's bold of you, especially when you cower behind Mummy and Daddy. Oh, and also the family name. You would be nothing without them. So, what is your point? My friends have built everything they have. But what have you done? Too scared to face your own prejudices. You can't even fathom that someone from a muggle family may be better then you, more skilled then you, and that you could possibly like someone who is equally deserving. But you like feeling on top because without your elitism, you'd be deemed worthless." She pushed, stepping closer to him with every word. They were insufferably close but she didn't mind, she had a point to prove. "Can't handle the truth?" El jeered, referring to his drawn wand that he had buried deep into her neck.

"Just tell me if she is okay." Regulus growled, knowing every word that had left her lips was true. When she said nothing but smirked, he pushed the wand deeper into her neck which caused the blonde to hiss in pain.

"She's okay, now. No thanks to Mulciber and his little cruciatus curse." The blonde said, glaring at him as he hesitated.

"He did what?" Regulus replied, obviously unaware of what had actually happened. His wand lowered once he fully registered what she had just told him. "Crucio? Wait. Did he actually? I doubt that. You would have gone for him already."

"I'm not supposed to know. He threatened her if she spilt. There is a reason that so many Auror's and Ministry officials have been here, Regulus. If she exposes who it was, she has a permanent target on her back. Plus, he's been hiding away for the past couple of days so I would tell him to watch his back when he decides to come out of hiding." El explained to him and he nodded, knowing exactly what she meant. Mulciber was a product of his environment. His family is far worse then he would ever be.

"Good idea." The boy said, looking to the floor. Clearly thinking something over, she knew how conflicted he was. Everything he had been taught was slowly slipping away but at the same time he was still fighting to be the perfect pureblood son. "You know, she might not be muggleborn." He let out after a moment of silence, causing the girl to quirk a brow at him.

"You really know how to pick your timings." She laughed lightly, leaning against the wall as she stared at the stone wall opposite her. "But I know. Her blood status doesn't matter anyway."

"How do you know? She said that none of her friends knew." Regulus looked at her with a frown, feeling slightly hurt. He had no idea why though. It was such a huge secret, of course she told someone that had actually stuck by her side.

"I figured that out myself, you can know everything about someone if you really try. But Izzy told me about a week or two ago, saying how she was the only she could trust. Way to screw a girl over by the way. She told me what happened over the break." Eleanor said, folding her arms over her chest as the boy sighed.

"I didn't do it. If that's what she said. It was Mulciber. I told them not to go ahead with the plan but he showed up and I couldn't talk him out of it. Not without looking suspicious. They wanted to use Isadora to get inside information. She didn't eat the chocolates so Mulciber got mad." Regulus explained, genuinely looking upset over what happened. But in a blink of the eye, he was like stone again.

"And you stopped them because..." She trailed off, wanting verification to the answer that she had already mustered up. Finally looking at him, he had a blank stare signifying what she already knew to be true.

"I don't know. Because- Well, she's different to other mudbloods. I mean- shit. Muggleborns." He told her, correcting himself when she raised an annoyed brow at him.

"If you gave them the light of day, you would find that she is not so different. As long as you dislike them, I promise you that Isadora will never give you the time of day." Eleanor replied as the boy rubbed his face in frustration.

"How? This was how I was raised-"

"Others taught themselves to be better and so can you." The girl cut him off. She gave him one last look before shaking her head. "I'll talk to you later." El excused herself, leaving the boy completely alone. As soon as she left, he couldn't help but kick the crumbling stone on the wall out of pure overflow of emotions. Anger at Eleanor, anger at the truth, anger at himself. He was simply confused. Why did he even care? It was all too much.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


With that issue solved, she had headed to the tree to have sometime to herself or the company of those that did pile onto the stress. It was deathly silent by the lake. Her and her thoughts. All she was doing was caring for everyone when she couldn't even look after herself. Pulling the cigarette to her lips, she lit the stick after a few fail attempts and took a puff. It helped her breath. The burning sensation made her smile as she held the smoke back in hopes of a nicotine rush and slowly exhaled before she coughed out the grey vapour. Something so bad for her shouldn't feel so good. It was a temporary fix. She wished for something stronger but couldn't risk such things on school grounds -not until she had a stronger grasp on the teacher's antics- and smoking weed just wasn't doing the job anymore. It left her delirious and more agitated then before, she couldn't be bothered with it.

It was getting to the point where she was contemplating getting a fuck buddy. It had been months since she had been with anyone and it was becoming increasingly obvious as she was always tensed, frustrated, or flustered. For most people, it would be more then manageable but this dry spell had been three times longer then any other since she lost her virginity. Doing things herself was only so sufficient. She got bored quickly. It lacked any real thrill. Though she loved Marlene, nothing really happened and it was as if the kiss never happened. If anything was going to happen, the blonde just wasn't able to be patient enough to wait. However, she didn't fall back into her old state at the beginning of Summer when she fucked Avery out of desperation. She had to admit, he was pretty good but then he got attached and she wanted to splat her brains out against the stone walls of Schivon Manor.

Crack. An approaching figure pulled her from her overtly sexual thoughts. Unsurprisingly, Sirius was approaching. Decked in one of his hoodies, leather jacket, jeans, and bulky Dr Martens. A silver chain hung round his neck that matched the multitude of rings he was wearing. What caught her eyes was the black polish he wore, she had wondered who had done them for him as it suited him. She could faintly make out the smirk he wore as the dim moonlight hit the highs of his face. This was the last thing she needed, especially after _those_ thoughts. Gulping lightly, she shuffled over to distract herself. _Don't be fucking stupid, you can't mess another friendship up_ \- she thought as her eyes stayed trained on the boy. As he sat beside her, she could see the contours of his face. Why did he have to be so alluring? She mentally groaned.

"What you staring at, _darling_?" He asked, catching her off guard with the nickname. Almost choking on her smoke, her face soon became flushed but the lack of light kept him from knowing how bright her face truly was. A chuckle left her lips as she frowned, pulling a James and pouting like a toddler.

"There was this very pretty white bird." El lied, pulling the cigarette to her lips again as he fumbled with his own lighter. The boy hummed in response to her obvious lie as he had placed his cig between his lips, ready to light. With a strong gust of wind, the peaceful night was cut short and the flame burned out. "Here." She said, moving over to him to light his cigarette with the end of hers. They locked eyes for a second. Once it was lit, she quickly pulled back as she was being sucked back into her thoughts.

"Thanks." The boy said with an amused smile which only caused Eleanor to frown at him, confused at what he knew. It was just adding to her preexisting frustration.

"What?" She quizzed, her jaw clenching slightly as his smile grew. It was painfully obvious that he was doing it on purpose but for what reason - she had no clue.

"You know - I was talking to Lily and -" Sirius began, possibly another dramatic monologue, when he was cut of by the girl's snort.

"You were talking to Lily? What did you do this time?" El coughed out, quite amused by the two being in close enough proximity to talk. He rolled his eyes at her but smiled nonetheless.

"Anyways - she really runs her mouth after a drink or two." He continued, causing the blonde to freeze. Her cigarette burned out to the filter as she tried to think of everything that could have possibly been exposed. Quickly pulling out a new one, she lit the cigarette knowing that she would need that to survive this conversation.

"What did she tell you?" She questioned, her eyes scanning the mischievous glint in his eyes that was mixed with something else. She wasn't quite sure under these circumstances.

"Well-"

"Sirius Black. You tell me what she said." Eleanor demanded as he let out a loud chuckle from her anxious outburst. She took a large puff of her cigarette as the smirk tugged at his lips. _God, the things he- no_ , her thoughts got lost for a split second. What was wrong with her today.

"So, what's it been... Five, six months?" Sirius asked and she immediately coughed out the smoke that she was holding in. Though, she loved Lily but if she kept talking then an early grave was inevitable

"S-she told you that." The blonde stuttered, trying to recover from shock. Out of all the things that Sirius Black could have brought up today, it would be that. Her blush had made a come back as she stared at a specific spot on the floor. _Dirt, I like dirt. Mud is great. Better then everything around me. Well- no. Shut up._ The blonde scolded herself.

"No. You just did." He said simply, taking a drag from his own cigarette. Immediately, her wide eyes snapped to him as her mouth hung open, in disbelief that he had guessed such a thing. Why did he care anyways? "Nothing wrong with that, except Peter is getting more action then you." Sirius added mindlessly, staring up at the black abyss that was sprinkled with glittering diamonds.

"What?" Eleanor groaned, flopping back onto the floor so she was also looking at the clusters of stars.

"Yeah, James caught him in a broom cupboard with some seventh year girl earlier. We're all equally as shocked." The boy mused but she frowned. A girl? Something didn't quite add up there. She'd add him to the people that she had to speak to. For now, that wasn't her main priority.

"Don't need to rub it in." She sighed, getting another laugh out of him as her heart rate finally began to slow again. How could she be so stupid? Yes, Lily was loose lipped but she doubted that she would spill anything that personal, not unless Eleanor was around her. So, what was the point? Her eyes fluttered over the him where he was putting out his cig and she observed him for a brief moment. Did he just want to embarrass her? Probably not. That meant that he wanted something else out of their exchange. Her mind wandered, there was a few possibilities. She sat back up carefully, fluffing up her hair to get out the few bits that had gotten trapped. "Its not like you've been with anyone, that I know of, either." She countered and his smug smile returned.

"Meh. Here and there. My last was only during the Christmas holiday's." He gloated, making her roll her eyes sarcastically at him. There was a small pang in her chest that she couldn't quite ignore but quite quickly reminded herself that she had in fact kissed Marlene on New Years.

"Oh, well, I am sorry." El said sarcastically, her too putting out her cigarette before turning back to him. "That is surprising though. Don't you have a certain - reputation here?" She quirked, her hand falling down onto the socked skin above her own knee.

"Hm. I'm not quite sure what you mean." Sirius acted dumbfounded but she wasn't wrong. Though, he was never interested in the girls at Hogwarts, his antics over the summers had caught wind in what Eleanor liked to propose as his fan club.

"Oh, is that so?" The girl retorted mindlessly as her hand that was closest to him slowly found her bare skin, the small gap from where her thigh high socks stopped and skirt started. She didn't know what she was doing as her mind was blurred but in that moment she definitely did. It hadn't gone unnoticed. As soon as her hand began to dip lower, his eyes flickered between her eyes and her thigh, causing her to smirk. She paused what she was doing and continued to talk. "So, was that all you came to talk to me about? Who I haven't fucked in the past few months?" El asked him with a small smirk, one he replicated quite quickly.

"Yeah, actually." He deadpanned. "It is quiet funny seeing you all flustered." A gasp left her lips as she jokingly scowled at the very amused boy.

"Me? Flustered. I don't know what you mean." She said innocently which only caused him to smile more. This was not the day. Honestly, she didn't know how much teasing she could take and it was clouding her senses. Maybe she liked him as more then a friend and maybe she didn't but as the minutes passed with him, her thoughts began to circle back. With that, she twiddled with the hem of her skirt until a burst of confidence overtook her. She looked to the lake as she guided her skirt upwards, exposing the top of her thighs which where ghosted with goosebumps from the chilly air. Of course, he had watched. Eleanor Westbrook had been filling his thoughts constantly, how could he not?

When she finally looked back, she had caught him licking his lower lip as he stared up into the sky as he tried to calm his mind. The smirk that appeared was automatic, no matter how hard she fought to hold it back. Taking this opportunity, she pushed herself closer to him and he only noticed when their legs pressed together. He snapped his head back to her and they were, at most, an inch apart. It was a position they had found themselves in multiple times before, only to get interrupted.

No time was taken as he pressed his lips onto hers quite harshly, his hand grasping the back of her neck to support the position. Her eyes fluttered shut as she kissed him back at the same rough, desperate pace that they were going at. Both of them had waited for this far too long to be gentle. That didn't stop the fireworks that exploded inside her or the blush that heated her face at the sensation. It was a regular kiss but it felt different. But in a good way, it was so natural. Slowly, her arms wrapped around his neck as his fell. His right hand gripped her waist whilst his left handed was positioned on her thigh, the furthest away from him as he pulled it up slightly from its flat position. The multitude of metal bands were cold against her bare skin, causing a shiver to course up and down her body as he smirked against her lips in realisation.

Whilst her hands had found their way to his hair, his right hand had began to fall further down to her upper thigh as his fingertips were buried under the hem of her skirt. Suddenly she became hyper aware of her surroundings and if there wasn't creatures that lurked that way in the night, she wouldn't be objecting. Pulling away, she lightly bit his lower lip as their foreheads met, both trying to get some air. When he opened his eyes, his smirk only grew and her heart seemed to be thumping at an erratic rate, especially after his hand squeezed her thigh. Without as much as a word, Ella stood up and took his hand as she lead the way back to the castle.

Though there plans seemed to be cut short when they were greeted by McGonagall on the other side of the door. After making up some sort of lie that the woman definitely didn't believe, she escorted them both back to the common room in attempt to stop them from 'losing any more points for Gryffindor'. The girl was most disappointed but she realised that she would probably be thankful in the morning, like most times when she was interrupted. With people sat in the common room, they departed ways to go to their own dorms. Only when she was away from him did her heart rate slow. 

"Lily!" She called, the shower clearly running. If she didn't say anything, she may burst. 

"In here." The redhead responded from the bathroom. Eleanor entered and took a seat on the counter as she stared at the wall, trying to form the correct words. "What have you done this time?" Lily quizzed from the other side of the shower curtain.

"How do you know I did something?" She shot back in mock offence, making the other girl roll her eyes.

"Because you've been missing since dinner. I can only guess and it seems as though I am correct. So, what happened?" Lily asked her, knowing that something was bothering the girl. 

"I- You see, I kind of kissed Sirius." El explained, her voice barely audible over the harsh splatters of the shower. All of a sudden, Lily's face appeared with wide eyes. 

"You did what?!" The redhead exclaimed in shock, scanning over the girl with plumped lips and a messy uniform. She simply nodded with a wide smile on her face. "That wasn't all, was it? Oh Godric, don't tell me you fucked him-" Lily added, watching as the girl gulped. "ELEANOR FLEUR WESTBROOK! YOU TELL ME RIGHT NOW!"

"No. No! We didn't- well, almost. McGonagall caught us sneaking off so we couldn't." She explained and Lily sighed in slight relief, returning back to her shower. "I don't get why it's such a big deal though."

"Because, that is Sirius Black. I don't want you getting hurt." The girl explained as someone entered the dorm. A few seconds later, Mary arrived in the door way and joined her on the counter.

"What's going on here?" Mary mused, looking at Eleanor who's smile was yet to fall. 

"Eleanor kissed Sirius." Lily called as the shower turned off. 

"Lily!" She shouted as the blonde handed the girl a towel through the curtain. The brunette just laughed lightly to herself.

"It's about time. I thought the pair of you were going to implode before something happened." Mary said as they made their way back through to the dorm so that Lily could change. 

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well he has been practically drooling at the sight of you since you arrived, so I'm not surprised." She explained as El's jaw dropped. The blonde was usually the observant one, how could she have missed all the signs? She hadn't. All she had done was purposely ignore them and blamed them on her own delusions. But he kissed her first. 

♱

When the next day came, she had dressed to go meet Violet. Although, she didn't know that they were meeting yet. When she had awoke, she thought that she would have regretted her actions last night but she hadn't. That sense of disappointment still overwhelmed her as she laid in her bed all day, thinking it over. What had he done to her? His touch ghosted her thigh and to say she missed his hands on her body was an understatement. She sounded absolutely pathetic. Yet, she couldn't help but wonder if he felt the same. 

Walking the corridors alone, she waited in the shadows of the clock tower. Waiting. The girl didn't even know if Violet was going to show up. Ellie didn't even know what she was doing here. It's not like she would even care. But she promised Georgia. One day she would learn to say no. For now, she waited and soon enough there was footsteps climbing up the tower. 

"Georgia?" The brunette hissed as she reach the top of the stairs. "Lumos." She muttered, almost blinding Eleanor. "What the fuck are you doing here?" Violet seethed, a scowl forming on her face.

"She wanted me to talk to you." Ellie said, stepping forward. The girl simply scoffed as she looked her up and down. 

"Well, I don't want to speak to you. Goodnight." She tried to dismiss herself but Eleanor's words had cut her off. Turning on her heels, she looked on the verge of tears.

"There is another way. You don't have to go through with this, Violet. I know that it seems like you only have one path but I promise that there is always another way, if your willing to try." Eleanor explained but the brunette just shook her head, patting away the loose tear.

"You just don't get it! None of you do. All I have is my family. I don't have anything without them. They'll make my life hell!" She snapped back as the tears kept falling down her makeup cladded face.

"Yes, I do. You have friends, at least Georgia. If you refused to hope then you will be stuck. People care about you. They will help you, if you let them." El pleaded with the girl who looked absolutely disorientated. "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." She told her. "If your not going to try for yourself, try for Georgia."

"Why do you even care!" Violet yelled, not used to feeling so exposed. She kept everyone at arms length for a reason.

"Because we're not so different. I know what it is like for someone to force you to be someone that I am not. We may not get along but no one deserves to live like that." Eleanor explained. "Just think about it, Violet." She said, passing the girl and heading back to the common room. The brunette stayed though, thinking over what had happened. Letting all the tears fall at once. She didn't like being wrong.


	24. ginger, cigarettes, and mint.

chapter twenty four

「 ginger, mint and cigarettes. 」

♱

Nobody has ever measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold.

♱

POTIONS WAS THE last lesson of the day and Slughorn was droning on about the ingredients needed to make felix felicis when all the students had been distracted by what was happening next door. Since Valentine's Day was a week away, Ms Emmell -though she was El's alchemy teacher, she also taught potions and herbology- was teaching her class about Amortentia. It was all people could talk about as they wanted to know what they would smell. Who thought putting a powerful potion in the same room as a bunch of hormonal teenagers was a good idea, that was a disaster waiting to happen. It didn't stop Eleanor from being curious. Some people smelled the things they loved the most or something related to a person they loved, platonically or romantically. A strange bit of magic that should have never been invented. But here they were on the random afternoon, bugging to get out.

The classes had been promised that they would merge towards the end of class as the school was trying to teach prevention from taking the potion, to keep them safe. This included a lecture on the dangers and they had to brew a counter serum - which Dorcas did amazingly at. Finally the time came and they all shuffled out of the door. Lily and Mary both joined the two girls as they walked the short distance to the next classroom when Slughorn paused the whole group, just outside the door.

"Now, split yourselves into groups of four. Ms Emmell has her classes in tables so you will have to join a preexisting group." He explained as they all shuffled to be with the people that they wanted to be with. Lily rolled her eyes, knowing exactly who they'd have to group with. The blonde nudged her with a slight frown, she was under the influence that the two were getting on quite well. Simply shaking her head, Lily was the first to enter the classroom and found a spot between Peter and Remus as the class were all standing at least a metre away from their desks - each one had a cauldron placed in the centre. Mary joined Lily at Remus' side whilst Eleanor stood next to Sirius with Dorcas at her other side. Her eyes flickered up to the boy who was looking straight a head with a smirk on his lips, causing her to smile a little too as she turned to listen to Ms Emmell and her safety lecture. They were only to go up one a time from each group so the professors could keep an eye on them.

Without hesitation, James had volunteered himself to go first. He received a pat on the back from Sirius as the boy strutted forward. There was a weird silence that hung over the room as the first few people stepped in front of the cauldron and waited upon further instructions. A nod came from Slughorn and they were able to take off the lid and have a sniff. The group waited as they watched James' face contort from confusion to mild concern to cockiness, his lips were pulled into a signature smirk.

Broomstick polish, fire whiskey, and lilies.

He placed the lid back on and joined the group, very happy to just keep that information to himself. They all looked his way but nobody pushed for what he had smelt. It was something quite personal after all. And before they could discuss who was going next, Dorcas stepped forward without a word and walked to the cauldron. She was visibly shaky but the girl closed her eyes and controlled her rapid thoughts.Picking up the lid, she took a steady in take of the potion and opened her eyes.

Vinyls, new comic books, and Dotty's shop.

The girl frowned lightly as she pursed her lips, obviously trying to figure out if there was any correlation between them and a person because not everyone did have something to do with a person they loved. Then the last time she visited Dotty's shop came to mind. She had gone there with Marlene and Eleanor, it was the first time that she had spent proper time with Marls. Looking down at the potion, she frowned. That couldn't be right. Marlene was a girl... There was platonic love.She shook her head and returned back to her spot.

"Are you alright?" Ellie whispered to her and the frizzy haired girl just nodded her head. That wasn't very convincing. But the moment passed as Peter crept forward. He looked meagre, as if the potion was going to jump out and get him. For a moment, he paused only to collect himself and he lifted the lid to the pot.

Honeydukes shop and broomsticks.

The boy had never had much interest in flying and was only into Quidditch because of his bestfriends. Everything seemed to make sense to him as he recoiled and his face turned into a sneer, completely repulsed by the ideas flowing through his mind. Eleanor was curious. With his recent endeavours in one of the cupboards, the girl could only assume that it had been something to do with what triggered the recent events. After all, she was the only person that he had come out to so it was likely that he was either confused or trying to cover his tracks. Not a word was spoken as he swapped places with Sirius. He removed the lid and froze, trying to calculate what he was smelling. It was quite a strange mix that was hard to decipher.

Leather, cherry blossom trees, and pastries.

Frowning at the clear liquid, he let his mind slip into his memories as he embraced the comforting scents. There was nothing that reminded him of his best friends who were practically his family, he was slightly stung for some reason but then he continued to think. They all linked back to her. Everything significant that had happened to him was influenced by the girl, it made sense. They spent little time together each year but that was the effect of Eleanor Westbrook. But for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to meet her eye. Keeping his vision trained on the floor, he stood next to her: tensed. She looked his way but he pivoted slightly so she couldn't see his face anymore. The boy had been under the impression that he had a passing crush on the blonde. Love. He was not familiar with that emotion so it couldn't possibly be right. Bile rose up his throat but on the outside he was stone-like. He was terrified.

Mary took the opportunity and stepped forward before Lily could. She was most eager and had a pep in her step as she approached the cauldron. Pulling the lid off, she was immediately hit with the smell of the potion.

Petrichor, her mother's perfume, and father's cooking.

She didn't move for a moment. It had been so long since she had gone home to that smell that she adored so much. That home was long in the past, they had moved from Scotland to London to try and escape but her mother played it off as if they only had jobs available there. Tears pricked at her eyes as Eleanor met her halfway, pulling her into a tight hug. She had sensed something was up as the others stood there utterly confused. Lily took the decision to go next whilst the blonde comforted Mary.

The redhead loved many things. She had a bigger heart then anyone that Eleanor had met before, that came with its own negatives though. With her heart on her sleeve, Lily had been walked over and used too many times to count. But did that off put her? Absolutely not. It was something quite admirable. She couldn't seem to refuse those that had done her wrong so it happened over and over again. Take Severus for example, he had been staring this way since she had approached the marauders as a frown buried itself on his harsh features. After this class, he wasn't slipping away from Eleanor, he had some questions to answer.

Cinnamon, apple shampoo, lemon & honey tea, petunias and James' jacket.

She froze immediately and her eyes shot up to meet his to find him already looking her way. Her eyes were wide as her heart picked up the pace, pounding loudly in her ears. That wasn't right. She hated him. Well, that's what she told herself to make her feel better. In all honesty, her hatred was merely to cover up the guilt she felt when he only tried to talk to her. She saw the way he treated Severus, him and his friends, but Snape was the exact same. The only difference was their friends. Her stomach gargled as the picture became clearer in her mind. Sure, the marauders where not perfect in anyway but they looked like angels compared to Severus. How had she been so stupid?

"And what do you smell, Ellie?" Lily asked, trying to recover from her slight embarrassment. Her eyes had never left James' until she had to return to them. Unlike when she usually gave him the time of day, he wasn't smirking smugly. No, he was looking at the floor with the smallest smile on his face: hopeful.

Taking a step closer to the fascinating potion, she looked around at her friends that where far to eager to see what she would smell. In fact, the whole class seemed to be staring in the direction of the Westbrook. For a split second, she locked eyes with him. He had averted his eyes long ago but had now plucked up some sort of courage. His eyes glimmered with something that she was unaware of, this was one time she wanted to read him and yet she couldn't. She sucked in a deep breath and walked the short distance to the cauldron. Taking the lid off, the strong aroma plagued her senses. All of them familiar.

Ginger, mint, and cigarettes

Blinking at the scent, she could knew exactly why she was smelling each item. The ginger was the strongest, reminding her of the cologne that had been spritzed across the stolen hoodie. Everything was just bubbling to the surface. For years, she denied her self of feeling a certain way and had convinced her self of her lies. The difference between real and fake was the blurriest line that she walked across because she didn't lie to make her friends worry less, she did it to make herself feel better because even if it hurt then that was better then being numb. This was something she should have never lied about. Not even slightly. It had caused more pain then anything and it was going to continue, she thought as Marlene popped into mind. God, what was she going to do?

Remus had swapped places with the girl and was starring at the cauldron. He was trembling slightly because he couldn't tell what would be in his potion. After all, in his werewolf form he couldn't remember a thing but had a much heightened sense of smell. What if something he didn't recognise appeared? Quickly grabbing the lid, he took in a deep breath and was almost startled by what he smelt.

Chocolate, the smell after a thunder storm, and feathers.

Specifically a little white bird came to mind, one that seemed oddly familiar. You see, people couldn't tell the scent of feathers but a predator with a heightened smell could. A wolf thing, he supposed. Why would he smell a white bird? He knew that Delilah was going to ask him about this. What was he going to say? It wasn't exactly normal or anything to do with the girl who he's supposed to be unofficially dating - if he could even call it that. Running a hand through his hair, he placed the lid back on and returned to his friends whilst the teachers droned on. A sense of awkwardness had plagued the group, all of them unsure of what to say. Eleanor had tucked Mary under her arm still as the tears hadn't fell but they both felt the need for comfort.

As soon as they were dismissed, Eleanor made an effort to break away from her friends as she wasn't going to let that greasy haired weasel slip away from her. This was not a great time but he would probably go into hiding once more, so she failed him. Taking a left, right, going upstairs, downstairs, until they reached the quiet corridors. She knew that he was aware of her presence as his head twitched behind him every so often. When she grabbed him by the hood of his cloak and yanked him against the wall, her wand coming up to his neck.

"Well, I am surprised. I thought you'd never come for me." Snape snarled at her, only causing her to dig the wand deeper into his skin.

"Dark magic? What the fuck is wrong with you!" She snapped at him as he turned his face away from her. "Look at you, can't even look me in the eye. Tell me, Severus, are you ashamed of yourself or scared of me?" Eleanor asked with a small smirk. She couldn't help the thrill she got from taunting people, it was addicting to see someone boil over because of a few spoken words. The girl paused, snapping herself out of it.

"What do I have to be ashamed of? I am quite proud, took me all summer to come up with that potion. Now, if you don't mind lowering your wand." He said bravely, the snarl not leaving his lips as she slowly moved back but her wand was still up. "Listen Eleanor, I'm telling you this because I care about you. Make sure you pick the right side, I know you want to play the hero but all that's going to happen is you dead in the basement of some manor." Snape told her, grappling with his pocket to pull out something. A potions book. "You're smart Eleanor, you know the war's coming. Protect yourself. They don't intend on being merciful. Whatever you think you know, you don't. And your their target. They have an obsession of sorts." The boy explained, flicking through the pages. "I'm just doing what I can to survive, I suggest you do the same whilst you still can."

"What about Lily?" She said as Severus tried to leave. Clenching his jaw, he swivelled on his heel to face her once more. "You side with them, you sign her death warrant."

"Why would I care about a little mudblood." He spat but the blonde knew him well enough to know he didn't mean that. In fact, a group of boys rounded the corner. Yaxley, Crouch, and Regulus were all heading this way - whispering about the event that was taking place down the corridor.

"I'm surprised to see you here, Westbrook. Where are your little friends, not here to protect you?" Yaxley taunted as he joined Snape's side, the other two snickering to themselves.

"If I remember correctly, you were cowering at a few simple words. Need I remind you of that?" She shot back, watching his face harden. Taking a step forward, she twirled her wand across her fingers. Almost tempting him to challenge her.

"Watch yourself, Westbrook. The way your going, you'll be disowned by summer. Then your free range." Crouch said, his younger twitching across his lower lip. A smug look crossed Yaxley's face as if he had won this little running but the girl just laughed. A low heartfelt chuckle because she was finding that whole statement hilarious.

"I'll be disowned by summer. Sure. I'm really trying to push for him to get rid of me but nothing seems to work. I suppose, if does indeed kick me out then I have no rules to follow and I think that would be much worse for you then it would for me." She spoke dangerously, wanting to beat them at their own game. It was true. In the media, she was presented as a troublemaker and constantly bending the rules, they had no idea what she was holding back on. There was so much that nobody knew about her. She was trained. A part of her growing up was practising for days on end, not allowed to leave until it was perfected. That's why she was good at most things she did, it was engrained into her to keep going until she was the best. Whether it was ballet, her charms work, skating, singing, or even looking a certain way; she got addicted to being the best. And though you may think that it was an amazing motivator to have, it was anything but that. Poison. That's what it is.

"You think to highly of yourself, Eleanor. That's how people end up dead." Regulus chimed in, a small smile on his lips. She raised a brow at him.

"No, I believe you underestimate those around you because you've all been deluded by your pureblood teachings. All the incest definitely weakens the genes. I know, that's something you don't understand but-" El muttered as a smirk formed on her lips, knowing that they had no clue as to anything in the muggle world. That was something she learned about in her preteens, when the family entered the muggle world, but her mother had already been teaching her for years.

"I assume that you're trying to insult us-" Yaxley spoke up, looking rather confused. It was more then a little bit amusing.

"Yes, for your families history of marrying their cousins." She explained, folding her arms over her chest.

"Aren't you pureblood too?" Crouch snarled, obviously not angered by her statement. His father had taught him about the muggle world too and knew exactly what she was poking at, seemingly becoming angry at facts.

"Do any of your family trees have a Westbrook?" The girl asked, remembering her mother's last name. "Or a Knightley, or a Holmes? No. I didn't think so. By your logic, I would be the strongest, magically, here." She told them, striking a nerve. Though, she was lying through the skin of her teeth. That book that she had given to Remus out of fear, offered the truth to why she wasn't on any pureblood family tree, worldwide.

"Watch yourself, Eleanor." Snape countered, knowing how heated the other three boys were becoming. They didn't like being called anything but great and her argument was all too valid for their liking.

"What? You mad, Yaxley. Does the truth hurt? Unlike some, I'm not trying to sell you a dream and that's why you don't like me. Because none of you are special. Blood purity is all you have and, let's be honest, none of us really have that. You can burn whoever you want off the tapestries but there isn't a wizard alive that isn't truly half blood or less." Eleanor continued as Yaxley reached for her wand and she rolled her eyes. "Starting something that you can't finish, how typical." The blonde said, glaring the boy down. She shook her head and turned to leave, only for her named to be called.

"You say all this as if it doesn't apply to you too." Regulus challenged with a frown and her tense expression softened slightly.

"I guess that's the difference between me and all of you, I don't have to push the struggling down to stay on top." El explained to him, rounding the corner and leaving those four in complete silence. A pit forming in her stomach as she realised how much she enjoyed having that power over them. In some way, she always hated power. It manipulated the mind, making good people turn into hellish demons. There was not one person who wasn't tainted by power and she feared that power could do the same to her if she chose that path. The one that clouded her mind constantly because her mind was infested with said demons already. A devil in disguise. That was something she couldn't let break free, if not for herself then for her mother.

♱

It was late in the evening whilst Dorcas sat outside, stroking the neck of a Thestral. She had promised Hagrid that she would feed them since she could actually see them. A baby Thestral had laid across her knee after she had finished feeding them as the girl looked up at the sky, thinking over the potions lesson. It wasn't possible, was it. Marlene. She had wanted to be friends with her for a while but had she been mixing platonic feeling for romantic ones, it was all confusing. To this day, she had never really questioned her feelings, it was all dictated for her. You will find a nice pureblood and marry him. I want at least three grand children and one must be a boy, you need an heir to your husband's name, Dorcas. Since, she had come from a family with five sisters, the pressure had been put on from her as none of her sisters had done what was seemingly 'right' from her Grandmother's perspective.

Both her parents were dead at the request of their Grandmother. They were the ones that had encouraged her sisters to be their true selves. But she was left behind. Only Anita, the second youngest, ever bothered to write but even she didn't bother to see her. She was utterly alone with nobody but Edith, until Eleanor came. You see, Dorcas could see the Thestral's because she had been in that room that her parent had been murdered in.

The trees swung violently in the wind, rattling against the fragile glass panes. A young girl sat on a wide double four poster bed in a light grey and plum coloured room. It was late at night and she had come running in after having a terrible nightmare, one of which that involved a flash of green and a cold unmoving body. For some reason, the two adults had gone into a panic but only their daughter Dorcas was home. Tucking the girl into their bed, they had grabbed their wands and had gone to the bottom floor of their manor. She wasn't stupid, the little girl was far from it. At the age of five, she knew what death was and knew what the killing curse was. Her father was an only child and her grandmother had struggled to have a child for so long. So, when he married the muggleborn, she couldn't bare disown him. But over the years, everything had gotten worse and her Grandmother was bordering insanity.

Low muffles came from below her and she stood up to follow the noise. A part of her knew that she shouldn't but curiosity was such a strong pull as a child. Tiptoeing down the grand central staircase, she saw a multitude of cloaked figures gathered in the living room. Slowly making her way to the door way, she peaked an eye around the corner to see her mother on the floor sobbing. She couldn't hear a word they were saying but their mouths were moving. A black and gold mask covered all of their faces.

"You deny us. Deny to join us. A blood traitor. Marrying a muggleborn, what shame you have brought to your poor mother. I suppose, they could come in handy. They could make great ornaments." The man closest to them sneered, grabbing her mother's chin.

"Get your hand off of her." Her father snarled, pushing the man away. Anger bubbled through him as he pointed the wand into her father's neck.

"How about you bow, beg for my forgiveness." He countered, that man was the only one unmasked. With dark curly hair, pale skin, a tall figure, sharp jaw, and an elegant facade. His looks angelic looks opposed the black soul that festered within him.

"I would never bow for you, Tom. You always have been and always will be a filthy coward." Her father barked with her mother agreeing to his statement, they would die with dignity. Tom flared his nostrils in anger and he grabbed his wand, both of them knowing what was about to happen. "We will be avenged." He whispered, squeezing his wife hand before his eyes flickered to his daughter. The mother followed his eyes and muttered 'I love you' before returning to her husband and doing the same. With one last squeeze, darkness hit him with only the deafening scream of his wife filling the atmosphere.

An involuntary cry escaped the little girl's mouth as she knew what happened. Just like in her dream, exactly like her dream. Two head snapped her way and she sprinted up the stairs, she could hear the mumble of voices as she made her way into a wardrobe like she had been shown before. Tipping her head back, she softened her breathing as tears streamed down her face. Pictures of their lifeless eyes burning into her, just moment afterhearing her mother's deafening scream.

"Dorcas? Are you alright?" An approaching voice called. Instantly sitting upright, she wiped her tears away and turned to look at the approaching blonde. Eleanor stood at least a few metres away from her, dressed in the outfit that they visited Dotty's in. She too looked like she had been crying.

"I could ask you the same." The girl retorted, making room for the blonde to join her. Ellie smiled lightly, wiping the mascara stained tear from her face.

"I've just been thinking." Eleanor answered honestly, taking a seat beside her as she reached over and stroked the head of the Thestral. Dorcas froze on the spot as the baby crawled its way over to the blonde and liked her face, a soft laugh escaping her rosey lips.

"You- El. You can see them." She said, almost horrified by that fact. The other girl bit her lip as she turned to face Dorcas, sorrow gleaming in her dulled green eyes. They didn't seem to have that usual hypnotising gleam in her eyes.

"I have been able to since I was little. Though, I have never seen death myself. It is quite odd." El admitted to her as the baby curled up in her lap.

"That's impossible." Dorcas countered, looking at her. But seemingly, it was. She was utterly confused.

"You say something is 'impossible' as if you don't attend a school for witchcraft and wizardry. A majority of muggles find that impossible but here we are." The blonde told her and a silence fell over them. Then, Dorcas let out a low giggle and Eleanor joined in as they watched the Thestrals prance about.

"What was it, you were crying about?" The frizzy haired girl questioned, feeling like El knew much more about her then she did about her.

"Myself." She muttered quietly, the only thing that was constantly on her mind. That sounded egotistical but it was just ounces of self deprecation. Unfortunately, everyone was slightly off since the lesson on Amortentia and Sirius had purposefully ignored her. What had she done. "Dorcas, do you ever worry about how you'll end up?" She asked and the girl let out a loud laugh.

"Everyday. Where i'll be, who i'll be with. It's just all an uncertain blur." She admitted, looking away momentarily and Eleanor hummed in agreement.

"Can I ask you something?" Dorcas brokenthe silence, only one thing coming to mind since she had arrived.

"Yeah, go on." She said, turning to face her. The smell of cigarettes and soap clouded Dorcas' senses.

"What's going on between you and Marlene?" The girl asked the one question that El had no idea how to answer.

"I don't know myself." Eleanor told her honestly, letting out a small sigh. It was driving her crazy.

"I see the way she looks at you, I see the way everyone looks at you. Is it nice being you? Having everyone look at you like you're everything that they want to be or be with. Like, have you ever noticed the way Sirius stares at you - like your the prettiest star in the sky." She adds and Eleanor falls silent. Truthfully, she hadn't noticed. Not anymore. All the stares blended into one and it was hard to decipher.

"When you put it like that, I sound amazing." El said, looking towards her nails and tatted sleeve of her jacket that she had chewed. "But all I can do is break a heart or disappoint them. Why do you ask, anyways?"

"Because Eleanor, I smelled Dotty's shop. The first place we spent time together and i've never smiled so much in the space of an hour. How am I supposed to compete with you?" Dorcas whispered, her head hung low but Eleanor reached over and grabbed her hand.

"No matter how I feel, I will always put Marlene before me. I don't deserve her because I don't think that I could ever truly give her my heart and I think she knows that. Dorcas, you couldn't compete with me because you would win. And I think it is time that you put a little faith in yourself."


	25. valentines

**_chapter twenty five_ **

「 _valentines_ 」

♱

_Sunrise is starting to feel like a guilt trip._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _SITTING DOWN AT_** the Gryffindor table, she flipped through the paper to the missing pages. It was the seventh. Two new missing persons ads appeared in rotation. One from Romania and another from Brazil. Muggleborn. They were getting younger by the week. First time around, the people being kidnapped had been in their early twenties but these two children looked no older then thirteen. A girl and a boy, probably never to be seen again. There had been no leads whatsoever. The ministry simply didn't care because no one had noticed. Nobody would notice until the first bodies started showing, when its too late. Throwing the paper away from her, James looked up with a frown. He was in his quidditch uniform since he had practise and she was going to dance. It was far more people and nobody tried to entering the classroom whilst she was there. Apparently it had been a popular spot after Bertha Jorkins -the loud mouth Gryffindor in the year above them, well technically two years above but she had to resit her NEWTs after failing all of them- had caught the blonde slipping out of there.

"Why are you looking at me like I just knocked you off your broom?" Eleanor asked, grabbing a piece of fruit before filling up her bottle of water. The boy scoffed, feigning some dramatic fainting as she rolled her eyes at him.

"How dare you excuse me of such a crime!" James exclaimed. She had forgotten that he, much like Sirius, loved any opportunity to create a scene. His hand rested on the bench,so when she kicked his arm, the boy tumbled backwards. All eyes shot to the two who were creating so much noise early in a morning. It didn't take long for them to starting along with Eleanor who was currently hunched over because her stomached ached from laughing so much. Instead of getting up and dusting off the incident, James laid on the floor -his legs still hanging over the seat- with his arms crossed and a toddler pout on his lips.

"Oh look, there's Lily." Eleanor said and the boy hopped up straight away. Surprisingly, the redhead opened the door to the great hall when his head turned to check that Eleanor wasn't lying. Lucky guess. But she noticed how red in the face James had become and Lily did the same when she saw the two sat together, she immediately froze.

"Uh, I better get to practise. I have to- erm- set up." He told the girl, unconvincingly. Eleanor couldn't get a word in as the two swapped places. The redhead didn't say a word as she stocked her plate with food.

"What was th-"

"Jack asked me on a date, yesterday. I'm going out with him on Valentine's day!" Lily told her best friend with a bright smile which she returned. It was obvious that she didn't want to talk about what happened, not yet anyways. Lily had to process everything herself before spilling to Eleanor which didn't seem like a bad method and definitely something the blonde needed to work on.

"That's great! I was wondering when you two where going to become a thing." El spoke, returning back to her newspaper to read over other relevant news. Nothing a quick Accio couldn't fix.

"What's that supposed to mean?" The redhead asked, almost offended at her words. It was like she hated the idea of being with him. To be fair, Eleanor had not seen much of them and wondered if they had any chemistry. The girl eyes flickered up from her newspaper to meet Lily's.

"Well, you were clinging to him on New Years like a sad little puppy." She said and Lily immediately scoffed. "What? I'm sorry but it's not like your fucking him, Lily. That's more my thing then yours. With that in mind, you'd only be so clingy if you wanted to be with him - well that's what I assume." El explained.

"I do but he doesn't seem that interested in me. We mostly study together with Delilah and Remus but that's it." The girl told her and Eleanor frowned at that statement but shook her head at the thought.

"Really. Have you seen yourself, how could anyone be disinterested in you? Honestly, he wouldn't have asked you out if he didn't like you. Come on, Aaron could have set him up with any girl at Hogwarts." The blonde said, causing Lily to sigh but a small smile formed on her lips.

"I suppose. At this point I might just end up dating you, it would be much easier then boy trouble." Lily halfheartedly joked because she knew that statement was factual correct.

"I'll always wait for you, baby." El returned with a wink, looking back down at the article that she was previously reading. The redhead couldn't help get a little flustered - you couldn't really blame her though. Eleanor had that effect on everyone whether they liked her in that way or not. The girl was inexplicably addicting. "Anyways, I best be off. Those leaps won't perfect themselves." She said, passing over the newspaper and grabbing her water bottle. Lily shook her head lightly, really wishing that she'd give up at Ballet. It had done far more harm then good.   
  
  
  
  
  


The one good thing about dancing was that she got to take off her corset. Though she didn't tie it as tightly as that week in December, she still wore it when they were out of uniform. She threw on all the baggy clothes to stop her friends -mainly Lily and Sirius- from seeing it because they would have something to say, even though she was being safe. Weekend wearing only. She was addicted to the look that it created. Actually, she was addicted to a lot of things. Fixating on something for a couple months at a time til she nearly died and someone helped her out. It was the same loop. Lily kept beating her to that point which was unfortunate for the girl. As sick as it sounded, she quite enjoyed falling off. Not being this perfect daughter or friend or sister. She loved the chaos, it was kind to her. Unlike Death. Neither life or death wanted her. Walking the tightrope to nothingness.

Perfection. She hated everything that it was but couldn't except herself for less than if she wasn't in a flood of chaos, even that couldn't drown her demons as they seemed to know how to swim. Again and again. She practised and practised but never saw an improvement. Of course, she did improve massively but she never thought of the first time she tried, she always remembered that one time that it was the closest to perfect. Turn, leap, turn again. It was just her life in movement. Again and again until she sat down and ripped off her shoes in anger. A tear slipping down her face. Why was it important to her? She never remembered.

Stuffing her ballet stuff and corset into her bag as she pulled her oversized hoodie over the top of her leotard and slipped on a pair of trainers. That was enough. She climbed down the ladder and rounded the corner, instantly colliding with another body. Typical. She just wanted to get back in bed.

Wiping her tear stained face, she looked up to meet a familiar pair of eyes. They were unique but hauntingly beautiful. Like the night sky, they were a dark brown, almost black, and twinkled when he smiled. He was just taller then her, about five foot eleven maybe even six foot, but quite muscular. She had seen him around school and he was playing on the Slytherin team back in January. His hair were in thin two twists braids that reached just passed his eyes. With plump lips, full nose, sharp jaw, and high cheekbones: there was no denying how attractive the boy was. His lip was pulled up into a smirk as he folded his arms over his chest, like he expected an apology.

"Watch where your going." She said in a monotonous voice as she couldn't think of anything other then getting back to sleep. Honestly, she needed that after this week. Too much crying had taken place for her liking. That was besides the point though.

"And they say your supposed to be the nice sister." The Slytherin mused, twirling his wand across his finger tips like a drumstick. Eleanor scoffed lightly, a small smile forming on her lips.

"I can be, if I like you." She shot back, pulling her bag further up her shoulder as she copied his stance, crossing her arms and raising a single brow.

"Ouch. How are you going to not like someone that you don't know." He challenged.

"Never said I did." Eleanor retorted. "You inferred things from my words that I didn't mean or claimed to mean. I simply told you to watch were your going, you know, some people won't be as kind to you as I am being." She added with a look triumph on her face.

"Hm, I suppose I did." The boy admitted. "I'm Darnell Selwyn."

"Oh, the minister's son?" She asked rhetorically, finally understanding who he was. No wonder that he had such a familiar face.

"You do know me?" He quizzed with a cheeky smile.

"I guess so. And since you referred to me as the 'nice sister', I'll assume you know who I am already." She answered as he nodded.

"Indeed. Don't think there's been a cover without your face on it for the past year." He said whilst she shook her head, a smile on her embarrassed face. "Your the sister that was partying all summer, had to get your family to pack up and move after that one."

"Yeah, it was worth it though." El told him, causing the boy's smirk to grow.

"In that case, you should come to the party on Valentine's day. Slytherin common room. I'll get you in." He offered hopefully. That was an option but she was still clinging to a bit of hope that a certain boy wasn't ignoring her and was just busy.

"I'll think about it." The blonde said before walking off, needing to shower and such. Darnell watched her for a moment before walking away, smiling to himself.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


As Valentine's day got closer, everybody was scrambling to find a date. It was Thursday and the day was on Monday, during their half term week off. To be honest, she was more excited for her birthday but that was over two weeks away. A part from Lily and Alice, none of her friends didn't seemed to be that phased by Valentine's day but she was secretly hoping that Dorcas plucked up the courage to ask her. It was unlikely but would have been cute. It would probably save her from the awkward conversation that she needed to have Marlene but that was not the main reason she wanted her to ask out Marls.

"Morning all. How are you?" Delilah asked, skipping over and pecking Remus on his lips. She still didn't look well. The blonde had advised Marlene to watch over her and makes sure that she eats once a day. There was an improvement but she clearly wasn't better. Eleanor had no idea how to help her mentally because, even though she had stopped, it could come back at any time. She never really healed her mind. Another trouble for another day, she supposed. Her poor mindset was that if it wasn't effecting her right then than there was no issue. On a whole, it worked.

"I'm alright. How about you?" Mary asked from Remus' other side whilst Isadora took a seat by Eleanor. She had been out of school for a while, they sent her to St. Mungos for a proper examination and had to close the case due to the lack of evidence. Mulciber had at least been smart enough to use a stolen wand. But being with everyone was a bit overwhelming. She already had severe anxiety but this almost tipped her over the edge. Though, Thomas hadn't left her side once. He was extremely guilty about the whole situation.

"Regulus is staring at you." Eleanor whispered to the girl and her head shot up, immediately meeting his grey eyes. A shiver ran through her entire body, she thought about spewing but that would just attract far more attention that she didn't want. He was stiff - angry almost. With his knuckles turning white from gripping his fork a bit too harshly, an abundance of thoughts ran through his head.

"I can't do this, Eleanor. I have classes with him and Mulciber- Oh merlin. I'm going to be sick." Isadora said in a quickened pace, sensing a panic attack coming. _Not now_ , she mentally groaned.

"Okay. Breathe. We'll skip. Just today. Let me go get my wand and I will meet you at the doors. Marlene will wait with you." The blonde replied with a smile that could calm any nerves. With a nod, Eleanor hopped up and whispered something to Marlene before disappearing.

To be honest, she didn't want to go to classes either. It was only half a day, technically, but it was still her worst. Climbing the multitude of stairs, she reached the portrait - which was horribly named in her opinion - and heard an obnoxious laugh, probably a bunch of fifth years. But once she muttered the password, she regretted her choices.

Stood before her was a scruffy looking girl that had hardly finished dressing herself and had makeup slopping all around her face. Violet. Next to her was the dark haired boy with the stormy eyes. A sense of hot furry washed over her and her fists curled into a ball. At the sight of the blonde, Violet simply smirked and squeezed Sirius' hand that she was holding to which he instantly let go of. Scoffing softly, El barged through them - almost sending Violet flying.

"Might want to go fix yourself up, Violet. Professor Hornsby's on the prowl and whores like you are eye candy for him." Eleanor told her, feigning kindness whilst pouting and batting her lashes at the brunette. When the girl let out a gasp, Eleanor let out a laugh and ventured up the stairs. She wasn't wrong, actually she was probably doing the girl a favour. At least when El fucked someone, she left looking classy. Amateur.

When she reached the Great hall, breakfast wasn't over. And she scanned the crowd, she spotted Sirius sucking face with her at the Ravenclaw table. Why was she so mad? No, she knew but he was making everything so easy to deny. In a second of impulse, she strutted over to the Slytherin table with one idea in mind. Fellow Slytherins turned their head to watch the Gryffindor as she passed them, especially a certain group who were borderline obsessed at this point as she headed to the boy from a few days ago. Before she even reached where he sat, the boy looked up from his friends and met her emerald-like eyes. The group had fallen silent at her presence. She only really recognised one boy that she believed to be called Rowan, he was in her alchemy class. A part from him, there was a mix of six and seventh year boys and girls that were gawking at her.

"If your offer still stands, I'd love to go to that party." She told him. He smirked at her as she placed her hands on the table to lean down and becoming eye level with him, flustering the two boys at either side of her.

"Sure. It's a date." Darnell said, making the girl giggle lightly and nod her head. "Great. I'll meet you outside your common room at eight." He planned on the spot, the group around him seemed slightly shocked.

"Alright. Better make it worth my time, Selwyn." The blonde jokingly threatened with a small smirk now growing on her lips. She hated chasing and much preferred being chased.

"Don't you worry about that, Westbrook." Darnell matched her and she let out a happy huff before pushing away from the table and walking off. Her eyes scanned the crowd to see the boy had been watching her the whole time with a clenched jaw. With that, her smirk became wide as she met up with Isadora and they headed out to the gardens.  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"I don't quite follow." Eleanor spoke, laying in a bed of flowers under Isadora's strict instructions as she hadn't painted people in a long time.

"What I'm trying to say is that Men are disappointing and shouldn't waste your time on them." The painter explained with a serious look on her face as she tried to perfect the contours of Eleanor's face. "Scratch that. If a man is rich then everything else is cancelled out. As Thomas told me, all men will break your heart but if they're rich then you'll get something out of it." Isadora added as Eleanor let out a hideous snort. She wasn't wrong.

"Yes but I don't have to worry about money, at this moment. So, what? I get heart break and probably a shitty heart necklace because they refused to let their mother pick. I'm above that." Eleanor said dramatically, though she refused to move because Isadora was scary when she painted.

"Please. You're above everyone, a little bit of charity work never hurt." Isadora continued and they both laughed. "Honestly, do what you want. I'm sure Sirius is just scared. Have you ever met yourself? I would be worried if he wasn't intimidated. Listen, he isn't doing this because your below or worse than Violet, and i'm sure he sees something redeemable in her, but men go for whatever is easier. A temporary fix. Violet has always been on standby whenever his relationships failed. Something spooked him and he retreated into old habits." The painter expressed, trying to sound as nice as possible as she did so.

"Well, I kissed him over a week ago. Actually, he kissed me but that was kind of my doing-" The girl remembered as she starred at the greyish blue sky.

"What did you do?" Isadora asked, raising a singular brow as she turned to face the girl.

"Well, I hadn't been with anyone in so long and he- Merlin. Why is he so fucking attractive? That's on him." She expressed, huffing at her only confusion. "Anyways, it's not hard to get a man turned on at all. You know - you can bite your lip, whisper something to them, show a bit of skin. Well, that's all it takes for me." El said after receiving a pointed look from the paused painter. "I, of course, went for the latter because I was impatient so I hiked up my skirt a bit. Drives men crazy, especially with thigh high socks." She added with a smirk on her first.

"Is that why you always wear them?" Izzy quizzed with an amused expression, returning to her painting as El scoffed.

"No, I do that because I look so much hotter in the mirror." Eleanor expressed as the two giggled softly. "But do you think it was that? Maybe he regrets it. I thought that I would but clearly not."

"I doubt it. We are talking about Sirius Black, right? I've only heard rumours but- Was it worth it?" Isadora questioned, studying her piece of art that was going quite well.

"Ruining a friendship? No. If you are asking if it was good then-" The blonde cut herself off as she smirked, something that didn't go unnoticed.

"Look at you blushing!" The girl teased, laughing lightly as she went in to do the shadows.

"No! I am angry remember." Eleanor scoffed, plucking one of the small flowers from the group as she picked at the petals. "It was just a normal kiss but it felt like all those kisses that the old romance novels describe. I think that was just the flood gates to all these emotions opening, though."

"So, it was just a kiss. From the way the girls talked about your past antics, that seems very tame for you." Isadora said, holding back a small laugh. She wanted the details but could you blame her. Plus, this was the most anyone had gotten out of Eleanor since she got here but everything seemed so easy around Isadora. She didn't judge her or have snarky comments or have to worry about emotionally crushing her either. They could both be themselves together and this was a friendship that Isadora had never quite had before.

"Yes. Just a kiss. McGonagall caught us trying to sneak off because we were originally by the lake and walked us back to the common room. Does she have spider-senses or something?" The blonde joked whilst Isadora mixed a new colour to add to the canvas.

"No. She is an animagus though. Probably saw the two of you and couldn't bare the embarrassment of interrupting. It's comforting to know that she's against teen pregnancy." Izzy said before the two let out a laugh together. She wasn't exactly wrong but that fact didn't seem comforting at all. The thought of her seeing her and Sirius was enough embarrassment for Eleanor to pitch herself of the astronomy tower - though she didn't need any encouragement for that.

"Let's hope she'll stay in her office on Valentine's day. That woman does not need to be scarred for the rest of her life." The girl in the flowers expressed, horrified as to what the school would be like come Monday.

"Well, Delilah has already kicked us out the dorm on Monday. That is not a thought I need when I go to sleep in my bed." Isadora pretended to puke at the thought, she had already caught them making out up there and that was as much as she could handle.

"DELILAH! What? Is she planning on- with Remus?" El exclaimed with wide eyes, it was only a week or so ago that Remus had told her that he wasn't that interested. "Men. Godric. They're even corrupting our little Delilah. If Lily finds out that the baby of our group has lost her virginity before her then she'll be fuming." The redhead protected Delilah as if she was her own child sometimes and that is not a situation that El wanted be around when that happened. It was strange how quickly Delilah had changed since starting to be around Remus, quite odd indeed. But it wasn't Ellie's place to say anything. Lilah could do what she wanted.

"I don't think Remus has ever had a girlfriend, not that I know of. So, are you really surprised. They probably feel left behind or something. Boys get competitive with shit like this, it's gross really. But maybe Delilah is sure that he's 'the right one' or whatever people say." The girl at the easel told her who hummed in agreement. This whole situation seemed off to her, especially when after Remus asked her how she knew that she was bi. Perhaps he wanted to experiment to know if he liked girls or not. Hopefully he wouldn't break the girl's heart in the process.

"At this point, I'm not surprised. Everyone's all over the place trying to figure who they are and what they want. I'm pretty sure the only people that have their shit together are Frank and Alice." Eleanor said, smiling at the thought of the two. They were perfect for each other. Anyone with a pair of working eyes could tell from a single glance at them together.

"I have to agree. That's what comes with being a teenager, I suppose. Some people repress their true selves and don't find themselves until they're in their seventies which is quite sad. May as well find ourselves now and live the rest of our lives knowing who we are."  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


"How you feeling, Lils. Nervous?" Mary asked from her bed, reading a muggle magazine of hers. Thankfully, Eleanor had not made the pages of that issue. Two roommates had taken the frantic approach and were twirling around the room to get ready before the carriages left at six but the blonde had, of course, taken the easy route. She was currently laid on her bed with a towel wrapping her hair, her dressing gown on, with a face mask on. Her eyes had not opened once in the last ten minutes as she waited to wash it off, even when Alice almost collapsed her bed by charging into the pole.

"You could say that." The redhead replied, adding a spritz of perfume as she checked her appearance in the full length mirror. She was wearing a Chanel dress that Eleanor had gifted to her for Christmas and fit her beautifully as it had been tailored for her. It was black with signature white panelling and buttons which made her look classy but still youthful given its cropped length.

"What's there to be nervous about?" El questioned as she finally got up and headed to the bathroom to wash her face. Closing the door, she decided to get ready. Using a spell to create her fluffy curly hair, she pinned it back in a half up and half down style with a few shorter strands framing her face. Then she did her makeup quite natural, pulling attention to her eyes with dramatic eyeliner with a smudge waterline. With her appearance looking to a good standard, she slipped on a strapless black dress that looked as if it had corset clasps going up the side - luckily it was sewn shut so if one did open then she would be safe from exposure. The best bit about the dress was that she didn't need a bra as it had a built in bustier. Tying up the back of her dress, she pulled on some shear thigh high socks to complete her signature look. "What shoes do you think I should wear?" The blonde then asked as she stepped out the bathroom, all eyes darting towards her.

"Woah. Fucking hell Eleanor. Your going to make that whole party pass out." Lily said as she admired the blonde. She let out a small giggle as she did a twirl. Everyone looked ten times hotter when they knew they looked good, today Eleanor knew. Lily spritzed a bit of perfume onto her neck as she returned to getting ready.

"I would say you should wear a boot with a heel." Alice came in to examine the outfit. She had opted to wear patterned flared jeans with a deep v-line plunge top which she was going to pair with a low hanging necklace and puffer jacket. At least someone was thinking about the Winter weather. But as they say, pain is beauty.

With a nod of her head, she walked to her collection of shoes and looked for the perfect ones. The two girls waved goodbye as they left to catch the carriages with their dates, though they had left a little bit late. She picked out a boot that went up to her mid calf and had quite the substantial heel on them. Lacing them up, she stood up and grabbed a leather blazer to throw over her shoulders because the castle could get nippy.  
  
  


Eventually the time came to leave and she picked up her jacket and through it over her shoulder like she did on the runway and headed down the stairs. Just like earlier, the boys were crowding around the fire, chatting. The soft voices of the girls exiting their half of the tower caught their attention and turned to see Eleanor walking towards the exit. She had such a model walk, filled with poise and confidence. A small smirk played on her lips as people stopped and stared.

"Where do you think you're going?" James quizzed, jumping out of his seat and he leaned on the back of the arm chair. With crossed legs and crossed arms, the boy had an amused look. The girl stopped in her tracks and turned around.

"Out." She said with plainly, causing Mary to let out a small laugh as she sat by Remus. Though, James didn't seem impressed by that answer and rolled his eyes.

"The carriages left an hour ago." He challenged as Eleanor checked the clock. 6:59. She didn't want to be too early.

"Been counting the seconds since Lily left have you Jamsie?" El shot back and small smile spread across his lips, flopping back into his seat. "I'm going to a party. I'll see you later." She said, turning towards the door before shooting a look over her shoulder. Sirius sat on the sofa, all dressed up, with a clenched jaw as he met her eye. Flickering his eyes up and down her body, she winked at him before leaving. The likeliness of him going to this party was pretty high since Violet befriended those Slytherin's. She didn't care though.

The door of the common room opened to reveal Darnell waiting for her. Dressed in black jeans and a white shirt, it was the perfect balance between smart and casual. His face pulled into a smile as he saw her.

"Wow. You look beautiful." He said, causing her to giggle lightly. She needed a drink to survive the night. "Ready to go?" The boy asked and she nodded.  
  
  


♱  
  


Compared to the party on Halloween, this was a whole different atmosphere. But she preferred this one, it was how she was used to partying. With the loud music, blaring green lights, mix of drugs on the central table and alcohol cluttered messily around the edges: everything was secluded but in your face at the same time. The room was packed with all different people. Some she knew, some she didn't: it was all a blur really.

"I'm surprised the son of the Minister would ever be caught in a party like this. Isn't it bad for press?" Eleanor question as she took a sip of her drink. They were sat on the leather sofa's, around the central table.

"What happens at these parties, stays on these nights. Anyone talks then the parties stop and the guest list gets reviewed. Not many get an invite." Darnell explained, having to whisper in her ear so that she could hear. The two were ridiculously close as it was the only way that they could communicate.

"And what do you do at these parties?" El asked in a teasing tone but she was genuinely curious. The boy smirked, turning his face so their lips where barely an inch apart. Before she could get an answer, she was distracted by a familiar laugh. Of course they were here. Avery, Lestrange, and Wilkes took a seat across from the pair.

Avery didn't hesitate and took the tray off of the table, beginning to scrape the white powder into a line. It was typical for the little rich boy, a routine as such. Rolling up a scrap of paper, snorting, tipping his head back as he held his nose before handing the tray to the next boy. He looked straight at Eleanor with a smirk and she knew exactly what he was thinking.

"Should have known you'd be here. Never miss a party, do you Princess?" Avery taunted, practically shouting over the loud music, earning a small chuckle from the blonde. She was so glad that she decided to get that extra drink.

"You know me so well." She retorted with a hint of sarcasm laced through her words, taking another sip of her drink. "Seems like you're up to your usual antics." Eleanor added, watching as Lestrange took his turn.

"You two know each other?" Sewlyn asked, eye the two that seemed to have had a long friendship - if that's what you could call it.

"Very well, actually. Isn't that right El?" Avery spoke with a large grin plastered on his face, causing the girl to narrow her eyes at him and his need to brag.

"Yes and that's the only achievement that he'll ever have in life." El shot back, a sarcastic smile on her lips. Lestrange and Wilkes seemed to agree as they laughed harshly at her statement.

"You having a go, Westbrook?" Rabastan quizzed, wiping his nose as he held out the tray. The coke had already kicking in, giving him that edge of confidence. She simply shook her head and took a sip of her drink.

"No need to act above it, El. I'm sure Sewlyn has seen all the headlines of you over the years." Avery reminded her to which she just rolled her eyes.

"You know I'm not into snow. Hardly does anything useful and fucks up your nose." She spoke, raising her brows at him for that stupid statement. Laughing lowly, he scanned the table as more people decide to join them when they realised that the 'party' was starting.

"Please forgive me. I forgot that you were a molly girl." He replied with a smug smile, one that she immediately replicate when he pointed to the bag of little coloured pills. Yes, she did prefer this party. She supposed those three Slytherins weren't too bad on their own. Her eyes flickered to Darnell who seemed to be smirking as well, wondering if she really was this party girl that the media described her as.

That was definitely the most accurate headline to grace the papers. Before she took the pill, all she could think about was Lily's disappointment. She didn't really care, it was something she was used too. Maybe the drinking had clouded her judgement. She shouldn't have. Why would she say no when this was the best that she had felt since arriving at this school. Darnell wasn't bad company either. He made her laugh and could dance, that's all she cared for in the moment. Her head was on cloud nine and she didn't even think about the state her appearance was in as she danced with a group of random girls like they were best friends for years. Most of them had taken the same which was figured from them all sucking on different coloured dummies - stopping them from grinding their teeth or getting lock jaw. That was the thing about MD, it didn't really matter who you were with, there was a sense of love and affection that plagued your senses.

The lights flashed and glared above as she pushed through the crowds, the music carrying her through the room. Her mind was set on one person and she had wandered if he had actually came to the party. And sure enough, he had. Sat alone, she saw the boy in a leather arm chair with his head leaning back. The boy was clearly off it like everyone else there. It had been hours since she had taken the pill and the effects was slowly slipping away. Not just yet. But almost. She ran a hand through her hair as she made her way over to him, his head snapping up as he sensed someone approaching.

The pretty blonde who looked a mess yet still managed to the most attractive in the room. As she approached, his mind began to race. Panic set over him as he didn't know what to do or say, there was no denying his distant behaviour since that lesson. He couldn't explain this. Not here, not now, not ever. Every excuse clouded his mind as to why that potion had been a lie. He couldn't love someone. He was Sirius Black. Love wasn't something he experienced, not often. Unknown territory was scary for everyone. But that seemed to annoy him more, he wasn't a coward.

Then Violet walked over with their drinks and that sense of panic faded as he was dragged into the dancing crowd. His eyes didn't leave hers though as her date approached. The blonde took out the dummy that was protecting her jaw and whispered something in the boys ear. Taking her hand, the two also headed onto the dance floor.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she began to sway her hips and the boy followed her lead. Everything about the blonde was captivating, even to those that didn't know her, especially when they were high. Everyone around them wanted to dance with them too and the girl let them. The music beat harshly in their ears as her hands slowly moved from around his to his chest. She knew everyone was watching, including him. Eleanor had always found it easy to capture the attention of others and specific people's attention was like a drug to her.

Swivelling around, she continued to sway with the music as the back of her head was pressed to her shoulder whilst she searched the crowd for those silver eyes. He was practically frozen as the brunette tried to dance on him, though her movements were quite stiff. Instead of being light and glistening, his eyes had drastically darkened as he had watched the two together. All she did was flash him an innocent smile that only seemed to agitate him even more.

But then he looked like he was about to explode when Darnell placed his hands on her waist and they trickled lower. She melted into his touch but her eye never left Sirius'. Completely taunting the boy until he had had enough. Within seconds, he was marching out of the room which left Violet to scramble after him. The blonde smirked to herself and carried on dancing.  
  
  


♱  
  


It was around three min the morning when she decided to leave. The drugs had worn off and she could feel herself crashing. Her leather blazer rested on her shoulders as Darnell walked her back to the common room and they said their goodbyes. She stepped through the door and the exhaustion truly hit. Pulling the dummy from her mouth, she no longer needed it. There was a harsh silent that hung over the common room and her ears began to ring from the lack of sound. She wasn't alone in there. Of course she wasn't. It was late and would much rather face the consequences tomorrow. Sleep awaited her. The crash was strong but in her opinion was totally with those few short hours of happiness.

Sat on the sofa, half asleep, was Sirius and she assumed that someone was busy in their dorm or he was waiting for someone - or her. Trying to tiptoe past didn't work as his head turned her way. A lump caught in her throat as she stared back at him. He tensed under her gaze before looking away again. That meant that he wasn't waiting for her. The blonde scoffed at him making him look her way once more. Her face was sharp and her lip was practically pulled into a snarl.

"What do you want?" He muttered in a harsh tone, a single brow raised at the girl. How did he have the audacity to act like that when he had been the one to ignore her? Eleanor shook her head in disbelief.

"Fuck off." The blonde said, walking out of the room and up the stairs. She wasn't going to stand there and take this. He started this and he could apologise. It was from then on that she decided that no one was going to treat her like shit, not anymore.


	26. face the facts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank you all as this book has just gotten to 1000 hits on here! The support has been overwhelming and I'm glad you've loved this story as much as I have!!

**_chapter twenty six_ **

「 _face the facts_ 」

♱

_It's so easy to lie. What's even worse is how we cling to those lies. We beg for the illusion so we don't have to face the truth, don't have to feel alone._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 **APPARENTLY LILY HADN'T** returned from her date last night and Eleanor wasn't sure if she should be proud or concerned because the redhead wasn't one to be risque. In fact, only Mary had been in the dorm when she had come to bed and neither of the other two had decided to show. She only awoke when the door squeaked and someone was trying to sneak in. The blonde sat up slowly and rubbed her overly tired eyes. Staring straight at her was Lily, looking like a deer caught in some headlights. Her outfit was crumpled, heels in hand, and her hair was like a lion's mane. Eleanor couldn't help but let out a laugh at her timid reaction. The girl was trying her hardest to hide her blush but it was no use. She only stopped laughing when Mary threw a pillow her way to shut her up. Lily had tried to slip away but her best friend was not having any of it, clearly she planned on not getting caught. 

"So, Miss Perfect. What did you get up to last night?" El inquired, hopping onto the bathroom counter as the girl washed off her makeup from the night before. The blonde couldn't help the wide childish grin that pulled at her lips.

"I-" She paused, looking at Eleanor and a small smirk appeared on her lips. "Is it that obvious?" The girl asked, examining her appearance. She believed that she looked more then presentable but her friend did have an eye for detail.

"You're joking, right? Merlin, where do I begin. The smudge mascara, wrinkled dress, guilty expression, sneaking around, crazy hair, exhausted face." Eleanor started, looking her over. "Not to manage that protruding bruise on the nape of your neck." She added, giggling as Lily let out a loud gasp. Her hand shot to her neck as she examined the hickey in the mirror. "Was he good?" Ellie then asked, earning a slap on the back of her head. "What! I was just wondering." The girl says innocently with her hands up in defence. 

"Yes, he was." Lily muttered softly with a shy smile and a vibrant blush on her face. That was enough for Eleanor to squeal, she'd been uptight for the past few weeks so this may have relieved a bit of stress. "You can't tell anyone about this! You weren't even supposed to know. We're keeping our relationship on the down low." The redhead explained to her and she nodded in return, doing the motion of sealed lips. 

"I can't believe you weren't going to tell me, especially walking around like that. Everyone was bound to know if you waited any longer." She told the redhead who just shook her head with a smile on her face. Eleanor had to admit that there was something wrong with their relationship but she couldn't pin point it...

"You ready to go to breakfast?" Lily snapped her out of her thoughts and the blonde agreed, slipping into a pair of shorts and an oversized hoodie before the two left, arm in arm.

♱

"Alright, El?" A voice asked, taking the seat next to her. Her eyes flickered up from her Alchemy notes. Remus looking back at her, a few books tucked under his arm. One in particular caught her eye, the one she had given him was horribly hidden between a few notes and a potion book. The mere thought of the contents made her gulp, she had given the book to him because she couldn't face the truth. Deep down, she knew that it was. Then again, her life might make some sort of sense. 

"Uhm- yeah." She said, looking at the floor with a frown. _That's one way to be convincing_ , she thought with a mocking tone. The boy raised a brow at her but she offered a smile that could anyone's troubles melt away. She knew she could do that and that is exactly why she did it, that's why the book scared her. Every part of her knew she was anything but normal. "Look I'm fine, it's just been a long few days." The half term had flown past and they were back to school already. Her birthday was the upcoming Saturday which meant that her father would probably pull her from school. 

"Is that something to do with Sirius?" He questioned, out of the blue. Her head shot up with a frown on her face.

"What? No. Why would that be something to do with Sirius?" She shot back, an almost offended tone. He smiled to himself at her snappy tone, he was just guessing before but now that she acted like that.

"He's been agitated all week and now your acting the same." The boy told her, making the girl frown. "And you two haven't been bounded at each other's side so I was just curious." He said and Eleanor jaw hung open slightly. Did she punch him, cry, or ask more questions and risk being more suspicious? "Careful. You'll catch pixies." He said, pushing her jaw shut with his hand.

"What do you mean agitated?" The blonde asked, curiosity getting the best of her. Remus simply laughed and shook his head. "Actually, I haven't thought about him since the party." It was true, she had actually spent a lot of time with Darnell. Mainly to make a certain boy jealous and it seemed to be working.

"Yeah, what happened there? He wasn't exactly happy when he got back." Remus explained as a smirked played on her lips. "Godric, Eleanor. What did you do?" He asked, slightly concerned by her mischievous look.

"I am just playing the game that he started. Whatever is wrong with him is his fault." She answered assertively, done with all the interrogating. "What are you here for?"

"Well, I finished the book that you gave me. And I think it is best that you read it yourself. From what I know, it seems quite accurate to what you may be and whoever sent you this wants you to know. I can stay while you read though." He said, catching on to her nervous expression. She didn't say a word, only nodding in response, and took the book that he had passed over to her.

_Throughout my years of research, I have never found such a fascinating species as this. From the depths of Atlantic ocean to the forbidden forest, they populate in every region of this world. Yet, no one has a clue who they truly are, until now._

_Some of the most beautiful people, inside and out, are the Antheians. A mythological creature from ancient Greek. No one has believed in their existence for centuries as they were erased from history. Today, I will finally expose the truth with Olive Hornsby - the discoverer of this community that blends among us._

_There has been no record of them, only starting to pop up in the British wizarding community, forty years ago. What do I know about them? They are divine beauty, someone of the most attractive to grace this Earth. They are the protectors of this world, of the people and nature. They have seen to be powerless on their own but in recent years they have branched their genes into other worlds and are now unstoppable._

_You will never find someone kinder and more generous than an Antheian. As a reward for being the protector for all, they were granted with eternal beauty and youth from those above. They are rumoured to be the product of Antheia, who was one of the Charites, or Graces, of Greek mythology and was the goddess of flowers and flowery wreaths. Hence the name, Antheian._

_From my studies, I have noticed certain behavioural patterns that correspond with other groups. A mix of a nymph, siren, witch, werewolf and vampire to form the perfect protectors of nature._

_The nymph comes into play with their powerful connection with nature, different types of Antheians work with each element better depending where they're from._

_The Siren is associated through the fact that everything about them is hypnotic, men and women fall at their feet. They're so elusive and intoxicating, it is easy for people to become obsessed with them or -in most cases- fall in love and the Antheian cannot help it._   
_Most of them can hold their breath for a long time under the water and they are calmed when it touches their skin. Plus, they look most appealing in water, more so then normal if that is even possible!_

_The Witch traits are as followed: all Antheians have magical blood and are invited to wizarding schools, however, they are not the best at magic unless one of their parents are a wizard. If they choose to attend a wizarding school, their best subjects tend to be Herbology and Care of Magical Creatures - or any equivalent to those subjects globally._

_The Vampire aspects are far trickier and will be discussed later on, for one to become a true Antheian, they must drink the blood of one. If their heart and soul are not pure enough, they will be poisoned._

_Finally, there's their Werewolf-like tendencies. Instead of the moon they are affected and controlled by the storm. It was a curse placed upon them many centuries ago by an infuriatingly jealous witch. They suffer immense pain, as if their limbs are being ripped to shreds. Often blacking out to deal with such a torture. No such cute has been found to help their conditions._

_From what I have seen, Antheian blood is one of the most powerful in terms of being genetically passed down. Where a person with 1/8 veela blood would be very limited of any actual veela magic, any Atheian (even something as small as 1/128) would be able to have the same abilities as a purebred. Their has only been two reports of Antheians crossing over to the wizarding world (their names cannot be disclosed for legal purposes) and this has created results like no other. My good assistant, Olive Hornsby, had gone to school with these girls and has told me that 'they can preform magic beyond your comprehension'. Now, Antheian's do have magical blood in them and a lot of school's around the globe send them acceptance letters but they aren't usually very good at subjects such as charms and Defence Against the Dark Arts, they do well in Herbology or Care of magical creatures {turn to page 8 for more.} So, for Hornsby to witness them preform such high levels of magic is outstanding. I am yet to find out how this is accomplished but I do believe it is to do with the bonding of the two blood types._

_Though beauty is often subjective, you would never find an Antheian unattractive even if they had traits that where undesirable to you. In a sense, they have this aurora that is completely hypnotic to everyone but it is completely undetectable. The women and men seamlessly blend in with society, they hide in plain sight. Whether they are black, middle eastern, plus sized, skinny, blue eyed, brown eyed, blonde, brunette, wavy haired, straight haired etc. They have no distinctive qualities other then their height. Every Antheian grows to a height of five foot eight or above - no matter their sex. Some of the models that currently dominated the scene, are in fact Antheians._

Pausing her reading, Eleanor stared blankly at the last sentence. Although all of this seemed far too accurate in description to her, this felt like a personal call out. She flipped back to the front page to see the credits page, looking for the publication date. The date that these books were first published was the 18/5/1976, exactly a year after she had walked the runway for the first time. How had somebody gotten to the restricted section to cross out all the information to stop someone from reading that in probably less then six months? Nobody had checked the book out. Strange. Her eyes met Remus' who was watching with curiosity. 

_Whilst they are sculpted by the God's themselves, that isn't the only magnificent thing about Antheians. Their ability to connect with nature is incredible. During my travels, I have gotten to witness the first properly trained dragon at the hands of them. Not even a Nymph has such capabilities. They can talk to animals through their singing and can also control them with the same voice, truly making them the top of the animal kingdom. That being said, Parseltongue is common in Antheians native to South America and the majority of Africa. Though, I haven't met many halfblood Antheians this is one trait that seems to slip through the generations, deeming it a rare talent like in the wizarding world. With the land, they can easily revive any dying area. The lucky few have the talents of manipulating the weather, this is often only a traitor of the leader of each tribe. All an Antheian would have to do is touch a dying flower and would likely spring back to life the following day. It is truly marvellous! This world has never seen such power. With power comes responsibility. They are here to care for this Earth, if the Earth dies so do true Antheians._

_True Antheians. Yes, a strange term as you have already seen me use 'purebred'. That is because this is an entirely different concept. You may have been born to two fully Antheian parents but that doesn't make you true. One can not become true until become of age, which is nineteen in Antheian communities - sometimes it is twenty but an Antheian is fully developed in terms of their abilities at nineteen. To become a true Antheian, you must drink the blood of an already existing one and depending on you, it can turn into a deadly poison or grant the drinker immortality. Not many risk this ritual as the heart and soul must be pure. And even though the Antheians are kind in nature, they are tempted by darkness much more then any being to walk this Earth. It is a test. Immortality goes against nature itself , it is the biggest gift that anyone could receive. That makes their lives extremely difficult, especially up until they are of age. Those outside of tribes suffer even stronger then their counterparts in the global tribes. Often the lack of living amongst nature drains them and they become more susceptible to the dark oman's of this world._

_There is the perks of being an Antheian without becoming true, though. As long as they protect this Earth and its people, they are rewarded with the most powerful emotion to exist. Love. That goes nicely with how engrained true love is in Antheian society. There is the possibility that the minimum times they could fall in love romantically was about three times. Platonic love could rocket into the hundreds for Antheians as a minimum. It was so easy for them to fall in love and an ordinary person are thirty three more times likely to fall for an Antheian then their true soul mate. Scary, I know. That sounds like a lot of heartbreak and it is. But each heartbreak can make an Antheian stronger and is often how they get sucked down a dark path. Like the idea of us having a soulmate, they will have one that they love above the rest. Both Platonically and romantically. Unfortunately, cases where they have fallen for someone outside of their species has ended in disaster. Mostly death. Whether it was them or those around them that they loved._

_You should not fear an Antheian. That would be rather foolish. If you ever come across one, you should thank them. It is not an easy life, not one that you would wish to live. They do all of this just to take care of the Earth we take for granted. My utter most respect goes out to the Antheians and all the sacrifices they have made for us. A community that teaches pureblood wizards that they are the greatest to grace us, that tells humans that they are the centre of the universe. But never have they once asked for any thanking, even when people have tried to ravish their population and put an end to them. To those of you that agree that they should not be able to walk among us, I suggest you rethink both your morality and your ideology. Never could any of us match the hardships, determination, and loyalty that an Antheian does. Do your part, make the change for the better._

She flicked the pages over to reveal one sentence. _Life of the Antheian Halfbloods, coming 18/5/1978._ That was a lot to take in and digest in one sitting. All of it made sense though and she missed the moments ago when she didn't know. Then this must be why her father must not like her. Yes, it made sense. Adelaide had none of these qualities. Even though the girls were similar in looks and people knew she was beautiful, no one had ever quite complimented Ada in the same way they had done for Eleanor. Beautiful. From the moment her mother died, her life revolved around her image. She was merely a marketing tool to her father. Be the perfect little girl and get the praise that she had conditioned into thinking that she needed. Oh, she felt sick. Her eyes couldn't even meet Remus' as she tucked the book into her bag and stood up.

"Thank you for staying with me." She said in a hoarse voice, trying to keep a strong composure. The boy could sense that though as his expression laced with concern. With that, she took off down the halls and she knew that he had followed but it didn't matter. Thoughts rushed through her head that would flicker a break down at any second. 

To believe that she could have an ounce of joy in her life was stupid. Everything she used to love was taken and used to display her to the public like a puppet and apparently everything that she wanted to love would be stripped from her. Whether that was taken or she was, both ended with her having neither. Her existence was purely selfish. She couldn't help falling in love, it was like another addiction of hers. That put everyone and everything in harms way. A mere heartbreak could turn her down the darkest path. Maybe that would be the best. Then they couldn't love them anymore and she couldn't love them because of the heartbreak. All of them could be safe. Unless she was brave, did the one thing that she had been begging to do for years. Greet death like an old friend. She had been close to them many times before. To sacrifice herself to spare them the pain instead of fading away to stop her own. That would be the brave thing to do. Lily wanted to live, she wanted a happy family again. James wanted to live, he had a bright future. Alice wanted to live, she wanted to find true love. Mary wanted to live, she had dreams just in grasp. Remus wanted to live, he finally found his real family. Peter wanted to live, he was no longer the outcast. Marlene wanted to live, she wanted pursue a life in music. Frank wanted to live, he had a chance to prove to the world who the Longbottom's truly were. Delilah wanted to live, she wanted live her life int countryside with all her flowers. Aaron wanted to live, he had everything that he had ever wanted. Isadora wanted to live, she could travel the world and paint like she always wanted to. Thomas wanted to live, he wanted to save the dying in the muggle world. Jack wanted to live, he was yet to discover who he truly was. Dorcas wanted to live, she could finally escape her Grandmother's clutch and live the life she wanted. Edith wanted to live, she couldn't leave without loving. And Sirius wanted to live, he had his brother James and that's all he needed to survive. They would all be fine without her. Eleanor didn't want to live, she couldn't live without any of them. With war coming, she knew what was inevitable. They didn't need her to hold them back. The blonde truly believed that they all could go on with out her. A few tears one day until she eventually slipped from their minds and she became nothing but an oversexualised girl that was plaster across the front pages every week. That would all she be remembered by. Life became too much for the poor little Westbrook and she tragically died - or some bullshit like that would clutter the news. At this point, she was barely a person. Just a pawn in the game of life. That was all she would ever be. That was something she could guarantee. So, why stick around? Ending everything before the true pain began seemed so intriguing. As the thoughts resonated with her, she quite enjoyed the torture. Everything was just so addicting. All the things she should shy from or be afraid of just kept pulling her in. The devil had his claws deep in her shoulders and she didn't mind.

Pushing into Myrtle's bathroom, her bag skidded across the tiled floors as she threw the fabric as if the continents where poison. They were. Everything now made sense but everything felt like a lie. She marched over to the sink, ready to slam her hands down when the porcelain crumbled to the floor. A few wisps of gold rounding her hands and she instantly backed away. She remembered something like this happening a few times before when she was mad or sad but it still shocked her each time, she still figured out how it happened. Someone else looked astonished by her actions when her eyes flickered to the boy stood at the door way. Remus' mouth was agape as he looked between her and the sink. _It's like he's never seen magic before_ , she thought as she mentally rolled her eyes. 

"El." He said, apprehensively. She looked on the verge of tears as he stepped forward. With a flick of his wand, the sink began to repair itself. "Your okay." Remus reassures, stalking forward as if she was a skittish deer.

"No, it's not okay Remus!" The blonde snapped, her eyes going wide as anger smeared her senses. "I have been lied to for the past sixteen years. This is the reason my father hates me and probably why mother is dead because she either cheated or is one herself! Ada is nothing like that and neither is my father. I have this shitty life because I'm supposed become 'true' or something. God, I've been waiting to die for the past six years!" She screamed, a hand running through her hair as she turned away from him. Nope, she shouldn't have said that last bit. He was probably looking at her like she was fucking insane! "And what, the cases where they - or I for that matter- have fallen for someone outside of my 'species' end in disaster. Mostly death. Whether it's me or those around me that they loved." The girl continued by quoting the book as she began to pace. "Well, I'm fucked. Your all fucked and it's my fault. Shit!" She said as she crouched down and covered her face with her hands, feeling as if she was being dragged down to the pits of hell.

"What do you mean- El. Who are you in love with?" Remus asked, coming to her side. One of his hands was rubbing her back in attempt to sooth her as he crouched with her. A silence fell over them. It was deafening how quite it truly was. Until she chocked out a small sob, everything was too much. What was she supposed to do. This was a lot to handle. Maybe it was best that this was hidden from her. Was that selfish? Least she knew that it was her or them. So did Remus. Yet, he wasn't running for the hills. He should be. 

Shifting her head to face him, she met his eye through the stands of blonde hair as another innocent tear trickled down the contour of her pretty face. He was watching her carefully and there was something about this look that was almost questioning - like the boy already knew. Was it that obvious? Hang on, when did she decide she was in love. Nope. All too much. Make it stop. This is just a dream.

"You already know." She whispered and the boy visibly gulped, not for the reason she believed. No. He was concerned for her. Over the last six years, Sirius Black had got himself into situations that no one else would. He never had settled properly settled for someone, no matter the gender. That boy had been cowering for the past week. On top of that, he was a complete and utter dickhead - to put it nicely. But he had always been different around Eleanor...


	27. a letter

**_chapter twenty seven_ **

「 _a letter_ 」

♱

_You learned to run from what you feel, and that's why you have nightmares. To deny is to invite madness. To accept is to control._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _SURE, IN EVERY_** sense, he had been ignoring her but that didn't mean that was trying to push her away. Not fully. Her words from weeks ago had stuck with him. So, on the seventh, he checked the paper and there was two new missing children. But now it was the twenty first and when he flipped to the back pages only to see five more had disappeared. All muggleborn. Three are still unknown and two from Italy, both of them had been interns at the ministry in that country. They were getting closer. Much closer. Surely they were fine, right? After all, Hogwarts was supposedly one of the safest places in the UK. Nothing is impossible. If one is determined enough, anything was possible. And to top that off, none of them were even slightly prepared. Maybe, he could break the silence between the two with this. Not like he wanted to, this was purely for the purpose of these people. Yes, he definitely hadn't been mentally cursing himself for creating this mess.

Unfortunately, he hadn't got round to that and it was currently Wednesday night when he had returned to his dorm in attempts to find the blonde. There was no need though. Laid in the bed opposite his was Eleanor and she was curled up with her head on Remus' chest. He froze at the sight of the two sleeping figures until he noticed her tear stained face and his face morphed into a deep frown. What the hell had happened?

There was a letter on the bed, crumpled and tear stained. He stood very still for a strong five minutes, trying to figure out what to do. On one hand, he didn't want invade anyone's privacy but, on the other, he wanted to know what had upset her. Pulling out his wand, he muttered 'accio letter' and the crumpled paper came flying to his hand. Lots of the words had been smudged but it was still readable.   
  
  


_Dear Ellie,_

_I'm struggling for the word's to tell you this but everything happened so quickly. I know we usually communicate through notes but the complexity and sensitivity of this subject deserved a whole letter. It is the least I can do. But please bare in mind that I don't know much myself at this time and Celine has been silent - hardly leaving her bed in fact. It doesn't help that the moon is just over a week a way and she's refusing to take any salutem exhausit. We need you more than ever. Maybe you could write to her, she always listened to you. Everything has drastically worsened since you left and now this is happening, none of us know what to do..._

_I'm not sure how up to date you are with the news but as their is not much updates on the situation, I thought I'd update you because you don't deserve to be left out of the loop. On Monday evening, we all headed to la boulangerie because Ximena said it was good to uphold tradition. But when Giovanni, Ximena and I went in - Emma, Louis, Celine, and Lorenzo waited outside. It was just another usual evening and Cortis was full of people in the 'pubs' as you call them._

_What I am trying to tell you is that Emma and Louis are all missing. I know you sent Vanni a message about the trend in the missing people and as you suspected they appeared in the paper's but they have being told to hold back from releasing the appearance and name to the public. Same with another man that disappeared from Cortis too - he was the owner of the bookshop you always went to. If your theory is correct and your father is behind this, her may be the one stopping their identities from getting out. I'm surprised this letter has even gotten to you as the school are trying to silence us, asking everyone to hand over their owls because they're claiming that there is 'disease' spreading through them and everyone else seems to believe this because both the French and English ministry are backing this claim._

_I know how close you and Emma were. All I have been told by Celine and Enzo was a group of people apparated down the alley they were stood in front of. They were wearing black cloaks and had these metal mask on that all had a different design but followed the same shape. Please look out for them, they often look like their mouth has been sewn shut or barricaded in some way, you'll know when you see them. I don't think that they expected them to be there as Celine believes they were on some type of mission. They wanted the book clerk or some information from him. Put since they had been caught, the hooded figures drew their wands. It was seven against four. There was a large poof of smoke that clogged all the shop windows and when we came out, Celine was coughing on the floor and Lorenzo was running out the alley._

_Nobody is telling us anything and Giovanni was given detention when trying to speak out about this. They could be anywhere and the longer they are gone, the harder they get to find. All that I know is that the law enforcement is helping to cover this up. They will start pulling their children from the schools if they find out. I believe that only you can get close to this. Nobody knows what to do. But your not in this alone! We are still here and I know that Lily is too. I'm sorry that you had to find out this way but it is better than learning through the paper._

_I love you, we all love you. Stay safe ma petite colombe. We shall be united soon, just a few more months to get through and we will find them. Hugs and kisses from Italy, France, and Spain._

_-Sienna_   
  
  


The boy blinked, reading over the letter once more. He had no idea who these people were but obviously Eleanor knew them well. So, they were the ones to have gone missing. He supposed that her friends hadn't been the target but was in the wrong place at the wrong time. They never usually took more than three because it would attract too much attention. This felt different though, a change was coming and not a good type of change. No. This was a sign that war was in fact coming. Nobody could stop the inevitable. By now, it was too late but no one knew that just quite yet.

Placing the letter in the exact spot, he looked at her briefly before leaving. There was something familiar about that description. As he thought about the masks, only one type came to mind as he wandered down the hallways. He was using the map to find his brother. Luckily, he was alone and sat in the Astronomy tower. That wasn't a surprise.  
  


"Brother." Sirius greeted, stepping towards the balcony that Regulus stood by. His eyes shot up immediately and a smirk pulled at the younger boys face. He turned his body to face him as he was more smug then usual.

"Well, well. Come to apologise, Sirius. I am surprised." The boy said, running his hand through his hair. Sirius didn't seemed phased by the taunting and just leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, waiting for the boy to be finished with his childish ways. "Heard you and Violet were a thing again. I must say that Travers was most displeased. Apparently her mother had chosen him to marry her off to. Of course you know all about that though. Can't help but meddle can you, one day you'll realise that not everything revolves around you. We can't afford you messing with the prophecy."

"Maybe if there was something interesting about him then there wouldn't be an issue. I can't take blame for that one. Come on, brother. Your friends are far from appealing." He returned with an amused smile as Regulus rolled his eyes, purposely ignoring the last sentence.

"What do you want?" The boy spat. He was always one to bite but could never take a hit. Not many people could though. Everyone hates been wrong at some point. Sirius just smiled and looked out at the view, almost having a sense of accomplishment.

"I have a question for you." Sirius told him after a small moment had passed. "The mask that mother got you, a year ago. What was it for?" He asked and silence followed once again but the youngest of the two had a smug grin on his face. They didn't know. But then his face dropped. How did he know about them?  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  


"Ah, Eleanor. Come in, take a seat." The man said as the door flung open. He peaked at her over his half moon with a pleasant smile as he gestured to the chair opposite him and he went back to scribbling on a piece of parchment. The girl carefully walked over to the desk and took a seat. She fiddled with the small locket around her neck as she drew in a sharp breath to calm her nerves.

"You wanted to see me, Sir?" She said, still shaken up from the letter she received last night. This war had already reached her and it had only just begun. Her leg bounce gently beneath the desk as she waited.

"Yes. I thought I should make good on my promises." He said, putting his quill back into its holder as he folded his arms over the desk to pay proper attention. "What is it that you know about your mother's side of the family?" Dumbledore asked whilst Eleanor looked around the office before looking back at him.

"Nothing, it seems. I didn't even know that she had a sister." Ellie explained, causing the headmaster to frown lightly.

"How strange. I must admit, that is surprising. I know you briefly mentioned that you didn't know she had a sister but knowing nothing at all. Excuse me for prying, Miss Westbrook." He said and she nodded at him to continue, not really bothered by it. "Both of them came to Hogwarts whilst I was still the Defence Against the Dark Arts, I must say that they both had a talent for the subject. I heard you're well accomplished in the Arts too, especially with nonverbals." He said in a questioning tone.

"Oh, well, I suppose so. Over the years, I have taught myself and some of my old friends which helped me get better." She replied with a small smile.

"You are very humble, Miss Westbrook. It is okay to admit when you have such extraordinary skills. Lots of your teachers are astonished by your skills. I know McGonagall is especially proud." The man praised, kindly. "Enough about you though. That is not why we are here. Tell me, how are you with animals?" He asked.

"I love them." She answered honestly before her mind slipped back to the book she read and shuddered lightly. Did he know? More than likely.

"Very well." Dumbledore spoke, clapping his hands twice and a bright red bird came swooping down to a stand by the old man's desk. It was a beautiful bird that stared at her with a gleam in its eye. "Your Aunt was one of my favourite students that I have ever had the pleasure to teach. As a gift from her travels with your Grandparents, she got me this phoenix as a thank you when she returned for sixth year. It is a magnificent bird." He explained, petting the birds head that nuzzled into the touch. "Fascinating creatures, phoenixes. They can carry immensely heavy loads, their tears have healing powers, and they make highly faithful pets."

"I am surprised that the phoenix was willing to become yours. Phoenix's get attached to their original owner." Eleanor replied, looking the bird over that was equally intrigued by her.

"Yes, it was a strange first month but Miss Knightley helped with the process. Fawks has been a brilliant companion." The man told her as he returned to resting his hands on the desk. "Your Aunt was actually in Slytherin and your mother was a Ravenclaw. An exceptional fit, if you ask me. Though, it seems that their choice in companionship did not lead either of them down the right path, unfortunately." He spoke as Eleanor shifted in her seat. Could he possibly hinting to her mother's mysterious death? He was a smart man after all.

"What do you mean by that, sir?" She asked, slightly confused. There was something eerie about this situation. She didn't like this one bit. What had happened here? She knew of the tragedy that happened during her mother's first year, a student had died.

"Have you ever heard of someone named Tom Riddle?" He asked, to which she shook her head at. "Just like your Mother and Aunt, he was an extraordinary student and was in the same year as Aurora. However, he had an interest in the dark arts. You may know him by his new name, Lord Voldemort." The man said and she froze, feeling the goosebumps rise in her skin. She didn't like where this was going.

"With all do respect, sir. What does he have to do with my mother or my aunt." She asked him and before he could reply, the door burst open to reveal Professor Jinky.

"Sorry to disturb you, headmaster, but your needed at Hogsmeade. The minister is here." The shrill voiced woman told him and he had a face of concern, probably reading her thoughts as she snarled at Eleanor.

"Very well." He said, standing up. "We will have to resume this conversation another time. Please excuse me." The man told her, retreating out of his office. She stood up, ready to leave when she noticed that Jinky was still hovering but she tried to ignore her.

"Did you enjoy your book?" The woman asked. Eleanor immediately froze on the spot before turning to see those malicious eyes.

"Which one?" Eleanor retorted through gritted teeth. Today was not the day to be picking fights, not after the letter and discovering what she may actually be. Not the right time at all.

"The one you were reading with your little freak friend. Werewolf, isn't he? You two do make quite the pair, don't you?" She taunted, creeping forward. However, Eleanor's facade stayed neutral.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what you're on about." The blonde told her, waving her off as she tried to leave. Jinky wouldn't let her. "Please excuse me." She said as kindly as possible.

"Do you think your special? Your bitch of a mother did. I bet your the same. Maybe you're like your aunt. Gullible. Tell me, do you actually think that people love you? It is delusional of you to think like that. But then again, the likeliness of you ending up dead is quite high, isn't it? You're a meddler, just like the other two." She spat but Eleanor's face didn't shift. In fact, she stayed completely neutral which seemed to intimidate the woman more then her out burst.

"You have a fascination with my mother. Was you in love with her or something? Did she reject you?" The blonde asked with a pout, her tone full of amusement.

"How dare you! I would never love such a creature. She took everything that was supposed to be mine! Using her Antheian magic to seduce the man that I was supposed to be with." Jinky shouted in disgust but the blonde was trying to hold back a laugh.

"So, this is what this is about? My father. Please, it is hardly worth the fuss. If he chose someone else, you clearly were never supposed to be with him. Even when she died, Conan never came running back. I hardly believe it was her fault." Eleanor told her, causing the woman to scoff.

"You have no idea what you're talking about. Filthy halfbreed! Of course he loved me. Why would you say such a thing." The woman looked on the verge of tears as she recoiled.

"I believe the only delusional one is you." The blonde whispered to the woman as she exited the office, strutting down the hallways to go back to her dorm.

To much had happened in such little time. Everything was overwhelming but she wasn't sinking yet. Not when she was finally getting answers. Only more were to come. Her aunt could have possibly been involved with Tom Riddle. The one threatening war in the wizarding world and the muggle one too. He wanted to rule over them all. Each day, his support grew. You never knew who could be working for him. To this day, she hadn't a clue what he looked like. There was no face to match his cruel ideologies. Supposedly, he was less haunting that way. As if he was less of a threat that way. Power was what he wanted. A need to be something great. There was more then one way to get answers. Myrtle had confused her with Aurora before. She had known her. But for now, she couldn't worry about that. Her birthday was less then two days away and she kept wondering if her father was going to pull her from school for the day. She was dreading the day. Especially now that she knew the truth about herself. How was she supposed to look at him? He was likely the reason that she was in fact dead. It made her feel sick to the stomach. Only one question raced through her mind as she walked through the halls:

Was she next?


	28. birthday girl

**_chapter twenty eight_ **

「 _birthday girl_ 」

♱

_The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 _ **TW:**_ mention of rape/grooming  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _HERE SHE WAS_** _,_ again.A sense of familiarity over coming the girl as she gathered her bearings. Like the few times before, it was oddly quiet. There was not even the sound of the wind that billowed through the rattling sticks. Nothing at all. Just the desolate landscape of skeleton trees and rotting leaves. At one point, the place had clearly been teaming with life but it was now like a dementor had sucked every inch of life from the place. The low winter sun shed a ghostly light on the grounds of which she stood. Though everything was dead, she couldn't help the comfort this place provided her. Even the worst of the known was better than the unknown. Taking a single step forward, a soft crunch of leaves provided some realism to the place as everything fell silent again. And she took another step, the same sound was made again. She could feel the moisture of the morning clawing at her bare feet as white wisps contorted in the air as she let out a shaky breath. Her head spun in every direction, looking for something or someone... They weren't there though. Crack, the sound of movement instantly caught her attention. Trails of white and gold fabric could be seen far away: running from tree to tree. It was a game, one that Eleanor refused to lose. Sometimes stubbornness isn't a curse. Taking one more step, there was a low laugh that came from behind the blonde.  
  
  


_"Looking for me?" A girl spoke but it was like Eleanor was hearing her from under the water. Cautiously turning around, she was greeted by a hooded figure that was bright green to stand out in the mix of all the grey and brown hues. With trembling pale hand, the figure revealed its skeleton like face that looked exceptionally healthy compared to the last time Eleanor saw it. That thing wasn't her, she refused to believe such madness. "It's been a while, has it?"_

_"Seems like that has been for the best. You look well." The blonde said, condescendingly. A smirk grew on the -not so- skeleton's face. "What is it that you want from me?" Eleanor questioned, hating this retched place that she was so drawn to._

_"Nice to know that you've developed a bit of a back bone since we last spoke. But actually, that's why we're here isn't it. You finally read the book. Took you long enough. I never thought you were going to read the book, especially when you gave it to that friend of yours. I'm glad he got you to read it. To be honest, I am quite fond of him. He is like us, in more ways than one. Well, now that his only reflection doesn't spook him. You have to feel bad for him." The figure talked to Eleanor as if they'd been friends her whole life and it was beginning to hurt her head. "Anyways. This is about us and our success. Your path has begun. Look at us, we're becoming more a like by the moment and soon we'll be one." She said, hinting for the blond to look down and she did. The backs of her hands were splayed out to her. Cold, greying, and boney; she looked like she was dying._

_"What are you doing to me?" Eleanor shouted, her eyes flickering up to the wicked figure. Panic was heavy on the girl's chest. They looked as if they were switching places. She had let this thing cloud her mind and still had no idea what it was._

_"I am doing nothing. That's all you. If you learned the nutritional value of food instead of what fills you for the least amount of calories then you'd probably be alright. You can't be perfect if it is killing us." The figure told her whilst stepping closer._

_"Then dead I will be." Eleanor answered with a challenging tone, causing the skeleton to pause in their tracks._

_"Dear girl, what have they done to you." There was a hint of sadness in its tone and a dull glimmer in their eye. And then, the figure was shocked, as if they weren't supposed to say that. Now, Eleanor was curious._

_"You mean us, right?" Ellie replied with an amused smile. That awful silence fell over the two, making the blonde a bit uncomfortable. "Go on, what are you hiding?" She challenged but the figure remained quiet. Eleanor couldn't find out, nobody could._   
  
  


Her eyes snapped open and she adjusted to her surroundings. This wasn't right. Instead of the dorm room coming into view, the scenery resembled that of her dream but this time it was a mixture of dark greens and a vibrant mix of colours from the petals of the flowers. She was on the school's boundary as the clear wall shimmered in the faint light. It was what remained from the protection put up during the second muggle world war because they had launched attacks on the wizarding community. She outstretched her hand when a snap of twigs caught her off guard and the girl turned on her heels. Surrounded. Masses of cloaked figures had gathered in a circle around her. Turning around, they had circled her on the other side too. Closer and closer. Now the world felt too small. It was hard to breath. Look left and right, she was trapped. Her limbs began to get heavy as heat sprung up her back and clawed at her back. With her vision blurred, her whole body went numb. Then the darkness greeted her.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"How far are we going?" A boy quizzed as he trailed behind another. They were walking through the forest at about seven or eight o'clock in the morning.

"Just a bit further." The other boy answered as he lead the way. There was a little hidden spot by the boundary where he was planning on taking the other one.

"Why do we even have to go this far." The boy at the back asked but he already knew the answer but he hated the sneaking around and the hiding.

"Because." The other sighed, stopping in his tracks. "I have a girlfriend and so do you. We can't get caught." He explained with a sad smile before taking his hand in his own.

"Well, I wouldn't if you didn't tell me to stay with her." The boy replied in a voice barely above a whisper and they stood in silence for a few moments. Leaning down, the leading boy kissed him softly and momentarily washed away the others panic.

"Come on." He said after pulling away, keeping their hands entwined. Moving further into the woods, the only sound was the early chirps of birds. They entered a clearing and the leading boy swivelled back to him as the other looked around. But then he froze. Waves of golden locks spilled across the rich soil as he looked to the paled skin. She looked like a corpse. Stumbling away, he rushed over to the girl's side and had to check if her heart was still beating. Thankfully, it was.

"El, wake up." He spoke, shaking her lightly but she didn't even flinch. The other boy had joined his side with a look of equal panic. "We have to get her to the hospital wing." He instructed, picking the girl up. The other one looked quite shocked as he didn't look like he was strong at all.  
  
  
  
  
  


"Ah! Ms Westbrook. Finally awake." Madame Pomfrey said, changing the water in the jugs. "Come on, get up. I've checked you over and you're okay. McGonagall wants to talk to you." She explained. There was a fuzzy feeling that coursed through her body as she regained her awareness. Eleanor simply nodded and slipped of the bed, slightly dazed.

"What happened?" She asked, holding her slightly pained head. The older woman simply shook head.

"I have no clue, my dear. You were dropped off before I had chance to leave my office." She explained with a sympathetic smile. With a nod, Eleanor got off the bed and took a steady walk to McGonagall's office. She knocked lightly on the door after entering the classroom and waited for a 'come in'.

"Hello, Miss Westbrook. Have a seat." She said, placing down her quill. "How are you?" The woman asked after Eleanor sat down. Before she could get a word in, McGonagall spoke again. "Be honest."

"I am fine." Eleanor said, convincingly. See, only when she tried to lie did it backfire. Telling people that she was fine was a simple as breathing, she could probably take truth serum and say that she was fine. It had gotten to a point were she had to deny the truth because that volcano that was brewing inside of her was far too powerful to let it blow. She didn't want any collateral damage. The woman just raised a brow quizzically at her.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Have you seen Ellie?" The redhead asked, far too loud for a Saturday morning. She had barged through the doors and was now stood before Peter and James that were just trying to eat their breakfast. Both of them looked up in sync, food inches away from their lips.

"Uh, no?" James said, unsure of his answer when Lily raised a brow at him. "Remus will know, they're always together." He added, shovelling bacon into his mouth. The two boys didn't even look phased and she wanted to drag the food away for them. Merlin, it was like they'd never been fed before.

"And where would he be? I haven't seen her since Thursday and today is her birthday." She returned and both of them looked up in confusion.

"Her birthday?" Peter questioned, looking equally as shocked as his friends. They had no idea. A sense of guilt washed over them both.

"Morning, Evans." Sirius greeted, sitting down in front of the girl. "What?" He said, muffled by the toast he was eating. He turned back around. "Do you want something, Evans?" The boy asked and she wanted to slap the wide smile off of his face.

"Yes, I'm looking for Eleanor." She told him and he turned back around, causing the girl to scoff at him.

"Oh." Was all he said until she slapped the back of his head. "Ow! Take me on a date before getting rough." He said, making the other two boys snicker. She raised her hand to hit him again and he ducked, throwing up his hand. "Okay, okay. Merlin, her dad probably pulled her out of school for her party. He hosts her a grand ball every year. Haven't you noticed the emptiness of the Slytherin table?" Sirius explained, putting some jam on his toast. "Didn't you notice when I'd disappear on the 26th of February or just at the end of February?"

"Yes." "Yeah." "No." They said in union as Lily took a seat beside Sirius. His head shot to her with a quizzical brow.

"What? I don't even notice when you're here." She told him, grabbing the cereal and pouring them into a bowl before adding the milk.

"That's cold, Evans. Even for you." He said as the girl shrugged, a smile pulling at her lips.

"So, neither of you were going to mention that it was her birthday?" James asked, looking between the two who turned to look at each other before speaking.

"She hates celebrating her birthday." "She doesn't like celebrating her birthday." The two said in sync before frowning at each other.

"Way to ruin a cool moment, Evans." He teased and she stuck her tongue out at him childishly whilst James frowned at the pair. Peter read the paper, smiling to himself as James -not so- secretly fidgeted out of agitation.

"Why is there a big party every year then?" James quizzed, finishing the rest of his breakfast as he wanted to do some quidditch practise in and Mary said that she'd join him.

"Because it generates mass amounts of press every year. The public go crazy for Eleanor so her dad uses this as an opportunity for new business schemes and to keep the attention of both worlds since she's at 'boarding school' for the majority of the year." Sirius explained as he carried on eating like it was nothing. The redhead looked to James who was already matching her frown.

"You could at least act like you care." The girl whispered harshly in his ear before getting up and leaving. Marlene was waiting for her with a pointed look. The two whispered and the blonde's face saddened before they went out of view. He was still frowning at her words but shook his head as Remus joined them, overly happy for someone that went out at six that morning.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Why must I wear white?" Eleanor complained as the older woman zipped up her dress for her. She hated the look of the colour as her skin almost matched in shade. Staring in the mirror, her hands ran across the silky material that clung to her figure. Her waist had gotten much smaller since the summer and she didn't know if that scared her or if she should be impressed.

"The colour scheme is black, greys, white and golds. You'll be the only one in white. It is so you stand out. If you had tanned like I had suggested than you'd be fine." Annabeth told her, sorting out the silk ruffles. "But I must say, I am impressed. Your figure is perfect." She complimented but that, of course, didn't last long. "Have you been drinking enough water, look at the bags under your eyes." She huffed, pulling out a wand and muttering a spell. Just like that, her little quirks disappeared and she looked like a doll. As she looked at herself, she realised that she maybe hated the idea of 'perfection'.

"Yes, I have. But I'm exhausted. The ballet routine is taking longer to perfect than expected." The blonde explained as her mother's old necklace was swapped with the locket. A small smile grew on her lips at the sight of the beautiful garland necklace. Her blonde curls had been pinned into an updo, only a few strands left to frame her face.

"That's your own fault. If you could keep up then you'd be alright." The woman shot back, turning to the brunette to fix her dress. Adelaide had been picking at the lace sleeves and left the threads hanging. Both sisters had refused to speak to each other, even when Annabeth had tried to intervene. "Come on. Lets go." She said, patting Ada's back to get moving. "Rox will come and collect you when it is time." Annabeth explained as she shut the bedroom door to the grand house her father rented for this ball.

There was a light tap on the window, a tawny coloured owl was perched on the windowsill with a note and parcel attached to the leg. She opened the window and untied them, seeing the couples enter the ballroom and her stomach lurched. Just another event to show her off like some kind of special trinket. Taking a seat on the bed, she unravelled the note and it said:  
  
  


_Happy Birthday!_   
_I hope it isn't grey._   
_Here's a small gift,_   
_Hopefully your mood shall lift._   
_\- L_   
  
  


Unwrapping the brown paper, there was a little jewellery box inside. She opened the box to reveal a small bracelet and earrings that matched her mother's necklace. The girl let out a sigh of excitement as she marvelled in awe. They were equally as beautiful. She wondered how this person had got a hold of them, apparently this necklace was custom made for her Grandmother during the twenties. She put the bracelet on, worrying that the earrings would be too much. Sure, she was still nervous but the little distraction helped. Looking in the mirror, she sucked in a deep breath as she stared at her reflection. The suffocating feeling wrapped its way around her neck and she felt sick again. _I hate this, I hate this, I hate this,_ she thought as she stared back at herself. Her hands stopped moving when she looked at how boney they were. Delicate in a way that she was fragile, not in a graceful manner. Then, she looked at her scarred hand that had been hidden with a flick of a wand. Everything that made her special was gone. Her face was replaceable. Next month, she could be replaced by another white woman with the same face and a similar figure with just a different hairstyle. The 'face of society' is just another duplicate with addiction problems. 

"Ms Westbrook?" The elderly house elf called kindly as he stood in the door way. She turned to see his saddened face and noticed the cut on his cheek. Rushing over, she examined Rox's cut and he tumbled. "We can't blood on dress, Madam. I shall be fine. My own fault, I spoke over Mrs Annabeth." He told her, Rox refused to call Annabeth Mrs Westbrook as that was how he had addressed the girl's mother who had been nothing but kind to him - the total opposite of the other woman. 

"I wish you would let me present you with a piece of clothing, Rox. You do not deserve this." The blonde huffed sadly, standing up again. Eleanor was so used to wearing heels that she was contemplating swapping out her ballet shoes for them, she'd probably be better.

"And who would look after you, Miss? I promised your mother that I would look after you until you were old enough. Now, I haven't done a very good job, have I?" He explained whilst patching up his cheek and his skin looked like new.

"Don't say that! You have tried your best. No, you've gone beyond what you have ever needed to and get punished for it. You cannot change the fact that my dad is a dickhead." The girl retorted, frowning at the house elf. He was the only one that made these things bearable anymore.

"Language, Miss Eleanor. That is not how a lady speaks and you must impress the crowd tonight. Your father is relying on good behaviour." Rox scolded but she could see the amusement that he was hiding. Opening the window, he looked around at the empty front and nodded to himself. "Right, very well. Time to go then. This party won't start itself." He said, hurrying her out of the door and he paused out of sight of the paparazzi as there was muggles there.

It was a good distraction but the nerves came swarming back. She went down a few steps, already hearing the flashes going off. The staircase was one of those magnificent ones that were very wide and diverged into two separate ones at the top, creating this small landing space were she stood. They were already firing questions her way as she posed confidently; inside, she was full of dread. Her eyes flickered back to Rox who gave her one last thumbs up before vanishing. Completely alone. She wished that Lily was here or Marlene. Everything was so much worse when she was forced to do this with no one she liked by her side. Not even Sirius. 

Flash. Shout. Flash. She was more concerned that the muggle cameras would catch her blinking as she descended the rest of the stairs. The photographers were being held back by some rather large bodyguards that were here every year. Don't fall. The only thought that was now clouding her mind. She didn't need to make a fool of herself as well. But as she reached the bottom of the stairs, the questions from writers and reporters finally became audible. They were very different to ones in previous years.

"Eleanor! Who are you wearing?" A classic question that she got each year. 

"Valentino, of course." She said, letting out a small laugh that mesmerised the crowd as they all struggled to capture that hypnotic smile. "It is a custom piece." Eleanor added, moving down the crowds to keep the hyped atmosphere going.

"Eleanor! You're seventeen now, any current love interests?" 

"Are you finished partying? Have you decided to settle down?" 

"Have you ever been told to change something about yourself?"

"What happened in Milan? We heard that you were hospitalised!"

"Since you're becoming of age, do you plan on getting any work done?"

"We heard that you changed up your style. Apparently short skirts are in for you! Got any pictures for our readers back home?"

"Sources told us that you're no longer a virgin, is this true?"

"Are you having an arranged marriage like your fellow socialites?" That was someone from the daily mail.

"Apparently you went on a date with a girl, is this true?"

"Would you describe yourself as a nymphet?"

She had forgotten that she had been hidden from media attention since her overdose, they were desperate for information. Nonetheless, they were disgusting. She wasn't even an adult yet. It was violating, made her feel dirty. They acted like they knew the answers, shaming her already. Current love interests, its complicated. Was she done partying, definitely not. Was she ready to settle down, what sort question is that? She'd been told to change practically everything about herself - not like they'd know. Milan, that was something that she refused to speak of in front of the people who went, never mind the press. What the hell did they want to change about herself through surgery? Bigger tits, probably. For now, she was protected as a minor and couldn't bare the thought of the pictures that they'd want when she was an adult. No longer a virgin, could've had the same answer on her thirteenth birthday as she had 'lost it' the day before. That thought alone made her stomach flip. She had been so naive and would have been classed as rape if they were both two years older but since he was a minor, it was fine. Sure, she had 'consented' but that didn't change how disgusting it was to her, especially now that she was the same age that the boy was at the time. He had took advantage of her and told her that she was different and mature for her age. It was the only thing that she didn't place blame on herself for. If she ever saw that man again, she wouldn't put it past herself to use crucio. Not long after that, she started sleeping around for the first time as a way of removing his touch from her body. That reason lasted until she was at least fifteen as she found new reasons to go from boy to girl to girl to boy. She wasn't ashamed of her body count but it wasn't she discussed with most people. Only Lily and Emma knew the true number.

An arranged marriage, never. She would quite literally kill herself before one of those pretentious fuckers could place a ring on her finger. They wouldn't want her now, that would be a death sentence like her mother's. None of them knew the truth, she didn't even know it herself really but it is not news certain sacred twenty eight members would take lightly. Yes, she technically did go on a date with Marlene to the ball, it was fairly obvious from the moment they started dancing together. She would come out when she was ready, the British newspapers had a knack of showing their homophobic, racist, and often misogynistic, views. Maybe that was something she kept under wraps from the muggles, for now. A nymphet, not self described. Who did? The press had called her that on the evening of her Fifteenth birthday. Then it was acceptable for old men to yell at her from their cars or catcall her as she passed them in her Beauxbatons uniform when she was in Cortis. Not like people didn't do the same before, it was now hundreds of times worst because the public media got away with sexualising her. She had been grown up to them since she first caught the media's attention at eleven, when they had just moved to France and her father got one of his new contacts to do an interview with the family. The people immediately fell in love Eleanor. From grown men that passed around pictures of her in Bikini's to their wives who pitied the girl and hoped that this never happened to their daughters. But they kept these pigs in business because they wanted to see that beautiful smile or they wanted to dress like her and do their makeup like her. Or their children that idolised her and her every move because they wanted people to notice them in the same way that everyone noticed Eleanor Westbrook.

"Eleanor! Is it true that you dance to maintain your figure? We were sent a letter from someone in the public. A letter from your step mother, Annabeth! Do you work out or do you just throw up your dinner? You have to admit that there is a visual difference in your figure since you were caught out in Milan!" A reporter called, waving a letter from her hands. Was this the letter that Ada had asked her about months ago? Her eyes scanned the page. This was definitely Annabeth. It had mentioned the methods that she could to take to get skinnier faster and how small her waist would need to be to fit in the dress for the ball. Never mind suicide, her father was going to murder her for letting this get out.

"Your audacity!" She fumed, ripping up the letter. "I have never seen this letter before. A rumour like that is terribly harmful for both me and the reader. Yes, I have achieved my body through doing ballet and I wear a corset in a manner that will not harm me." A part of her believed that whilst the other half moaned at her for being an idiot and leading herself down this destructive path. That was enough questions. With a nod of her head, the body guards pushed all the press out the doors and closed the curtains so they couldn't see into the ball room. 

The the large double doors swung open, revealing the masses of people chatting, eating, dancing, and drinking. Sucking one last breath, she headed down the aisle. People turned to look at the girl every so often, like a shiny trophy being paraded around a football stadium. This evening was only going to get worse. She could already see Walburga sprinting from her seat to try and be the first to greet the girl. Then there was the familiar faces, including Mulciber. If she batted her lashes then they might let her strangle the boy to death. He was brave showing up here, though he didn't know that she knew. It was hard to mask the snarl that she wanted to give him but the years of practise came in handy. Her smile didn't reach her eyes and only a few people would be able to realise that she might not be authentic. When she reached the head table, by the dance floor, her father shot up with a proud smile and pulled the girl into a tight hug before kissing her cheek. 

"Come. I have someone that would like to meet you." He guided her towards a certain table where she instantly recognised the faces there. The minister of magic, his wife, and children. Finally, a face that didn't make her want to throw up or throw a punch. As they approached, Darnell looked up and a smiled pulled at his lips. "Eleanor, this Xavier Sewlyn and his wife Valencia Sewlyn." 

"Pleasure to meet you, thanks for coming." She said with a curt nod of her head, adding a small smile to really win them over and it definitely worked as the two lit up. 

"What an amazing daughter you've raised! Shall we get a drink?" Xavier asked her father and he accepted. What a surprise, she had been here barely five minutes and had probably been used for a new contract. With a polite smile, she turned to Darnell and nodded her head for him to follow her.

"As flattered as I am, Eleanor. I have to tell you that I don't like you in that way. Thought, I'd let you know before you get the wrong idea." He said as they approached the corner, she struggled to keep in a laugh. Well, that was not what she was expecting. All she wanted was some company so that desperate woman wouldn't try and throw their sons at her, in hopes of some marriage proposal. 

"Really? You didn't mind having your hands all over me a week ago." She retorted with a smirk and the boy chuckled. "But that actually helps me out a lot, I didn't want to lead you on. I just wanted to spend some time with someone that is actually bearable." El explained, stealing a few shots off of a waiter and downing them all.

"Calm down, Westbrook. All eyes are on you." Darnell laughed to himself as they sat at an empty table, by the edge of the dance floor. "If I'm the only bearable one here, what's the point in having this?"

"Well, I don't get a choice. My father uses this as a press and business opportunity. I charm the crowd, he gets the money or whatever he does." She explained, sitting back and folding her arms over her chest. The night was still very young. Just wait until the dancing kicked in and she be twirled between each man for the rest of the night. "It used be alright. Sirius would be here and we'd just mess about all night." 

"Was he the one that you were trying to make jealous at the party?" He asked with an amused expression on his face. The girl let out a scoff but a smile pulled on her lips just after.

"How did you-" She cut herself off at the sight of his smirk and shook her head. "I'm too sober for this. Come on, get up. You're drinking with me." She instructed, already making her way to the bar. Without hesitation, he followed. Maybe the night wouldn't be too bad. Only time would tell, she supposed.


	29. you are nothing without me

  
**_chapter twenty nine_ **

「 _you are nothing without me_ 」

♱

_Hierarchies are celestial. In hell all are equal._

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _"WOULD YOU CARE_** to dance?" A voice asked as she sat alone, Darnell was sent home with his younger siblings to watch them till his parents got home. He had offered for her to come but leaving her own party seemed a bit ill-mannered, even if she did hate everything and basically everyone there. Her eyes flickered up to the figure and her lips parted, thinking it was someone else. It wasn't _him_.

"Not with you, Regulus." She said blankly, pulling her glass to her lips as she downed the rest of her drink. A small laugh escaped his lips as she turned her attention back to him. "What do really want?" Eleanor asked, the boy didn't exactly like her anymore.

"Why would I need something? You just seemed lonely on your birthday. It was me or Avery. And I guessed that you'd be less likely to break my nose than his." He said, looking back to the table of schoolboys who were all staring her way. "You've got hours until you can leave. You'll pass the time." The boy told her, holding his hand out for her to take.

"Fine." Ellie said reluctantly, taking his hand as they headed onto the dance floor. He was right, she shouldn't completely suffer for the rest of the evening. It was weird dancing with Regulus. Though he looked quite like his older brother, there were slight differences that were very noticeable to Eleanor and her observant eye. Like the height difference, and the way his hair was more wavy than curly, or how his face was more triangular than square, even that his grey eyes had more of a green tint to them. It was painfully obvious when she stood next to him. Where she had to look up a bit for Sirius, she didn't for Regulus because he was the same height as her.

That reminded her of Adelaide. If you looked closely, you'd notice how different they truly were. As she spun around the dance floor, her eyes landed on her sister sat at the table full of schoolboys. A sunken look on her face as she watched the two dance. Ada hadn't smiled much since they arrived here and that worried the blonde, even if she claimed to prefer Hogwarts. She had fallen down the hole that Eleanor swore to protect her from. Saving people wasn't exactly her forte. Maybe if she took the advise that she gave to Sirius than she could. Of course she didn't, the pain was comforting because that was all she ever knew.

"She doesn't hate you, you know. I don't think she actually wants to be with us but she's pushed everyone else away." The boy told her after figuring out who she was actually looking at. He wasn't wrong. It was terribly confusing for the younger Westbrook. At this point, she was the only one struggling to pick a side. She just wanted both worlds even though it was selfish. On one side, she lived without her father and the woman she considered to be her mother. But on the other side, she lived without her sister and her best friend, Clementine. Everyday that passed by, she believed that the choice had been made for her because subconsciously had. Every time she sat with those specific Slytherins, every time she spoke wrongly of people to fit in, every time passed on her father or Annabeth's wincing words: she had chosen. It was often difficult for her to understand why she couldn't have both but to those around her it was crystal clear.

"She'll choose my father. Why sacrifice having everything for nothing?" The blonde asked him rhetorically, making him frown. In retrospect, she wasn't wrong but he was always saddened about how lowly she talked about herself, all of her family encouraged said talk too. Sure, he had told her that she wasn't all that but only because of his own wounded ego - not like he'd tell her that or this. But he actually thought quite highly of the Westbrook, he had heard his mother gush about both Eleanor and her mother Florence. Sometimes he wished that he could speak of what he knew, she deserved to know. The prophecy was worth much more.

"And you would?" He asked, spinning her like the other pairs did. It reminded her of the time she danced with Marlene. Yes. She would. All she had left was to fight for those she loved, the ones that wanted to live.

"You have nothing to lose when you had nothing to begin with." She whispered to him before switching partners. The boy was completely frozen for what felt like forever to him but was only a few seconds in reality. Sure, he may had been on the other side of the war but he wasn't completely devoid of emotions - unlike some of them. He remembered when he first met the Westbrook siblings, both constantly giggling or had a wide smile on their faces.

Now neither of them did, not often anyways. Until today, he never noticed the small moments throughout the years. How the smile slowly slipped and was replaced by a fake one, especially Eleanor. The other sibling simply deteriorated at the sight of Eleanor's misfortune. When she was one, she didn't remember a thing but she smiled a lot. At two, she remembered being locked in her room for making a flower grow. At three, she fawned over at balls like a zoo animal. At four, she split open her hand and deemed worthless by her own father. At five, her father had began to train her in order to control her magic. At six, she was shouted at in front of her new friends for being too 'boyish' even though Adelaide had done the same and got away with it. At seven, she spent the week at Lily Evans' house with her sister because her father was angered by the fact that she was 'too good' at magic to be normal. At eight, she was ignored on her own birthday as her sister's skills were flounced to get a better deal. At nine, she wasn't mature enough because she played a game of tag with the other children. At ten, her mother was dead and her father couldn't stand the sight of her because she was too alike to Florence. At eleven, she was too fat even though she was the skinniest child there - being told to shove her fingers down her throat. At twelve, she smoked her first cigarette whilst fully grown men passed around a magazine with her face plastered across the glossy pages. At thirteen, she thought she was in love with a man that used her for her body. At fourteen, she snorted her first line and popped her first pill. At fifteen, she was sleeping around to forget his touch before dragging a knife down her stomach in a drunken fit - hoping that she'd stay in the darkness forever. At sixteen, she was addicted to being prefect just like her father wanted and ransacked the pills in Milan - along with the multitudes of mistakes she made that summer.

Now she was seventeen. And not to be pessimist but life was taking a sharp turn anytime soon. Things were about to get much worse, she knew that. Hope was blinding and usually misleading but was the only thing that held together people's tethered sanity. That was the thing, Eleanor wasn't hopeful. Series of events from her past just disproved any theory that hope could try and conjure.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"Eleanor, dear." Her fathers voice rang out from behind her as she sat alone again, spending time to down a tray of drinks. That may have not been a good idea. She was quite tipsy. "I have someone that you should meet." His tone was rather stern after examining the situation she was in.

Turning her head, she looked from Conan to the man by his side. He was middle aged, potentially a few years younger then her dad. The man was adorned with black wavy hair, a cold glare, a sharp jaw, and the visible signs that came with ageing. His entire aura was quite menacing and people seemed to hold a look of cowardice when he was present. Though the festivities continued, the atmosphere had remained tense around this man. She could not give a single fuck. What's the worst he could do - kill her?

"Need to impress someone for another business deal?" She retorted, raising a brow at her father. "Don't you have enough money to stop scamming these poor men?" Eleanor added, watching the man gulp. This was amusing, she couldn't lie.

"No, actually." He replied, fury burning in his eyes. "This is an old friend of mine, from my Hogwarts days." Conan explained but her face didn't change. She looked to him, quite unimpressed. A smile pulled on his lips - clearly fake. It looked as if he had practised that in the mirror, he forgot to soften his eyes. _Amateur_ , she thought.

"Pleasure to meet you, Eleanor." He said, nodding his head in her direction politely. And although she looked more like Florence, both her bored attitude and confidence reminded him of the woman's sister - Aurora. _His_ Aurora.

"The pleasure is all yours." She remarked, just wanting to return back to Hogwarts. There she only had to deal with her friends and that was manageable unlike all of this.

"Eleanor." Her father warned, a threatening look on his face. She flashed an innocent smile his way, it was so tempting to roll her eyes. "This is Tom Riddle." Conan told her after a moment, her expression didn't falter though which lead both men to believe that she didn't know who he was. "Do you know who this is?" Her father pushed, slightly worried by the way her smile warped into a smirk.

"Of course I do. But I simply don't care." She answered, causing Tom to clench his jaw. There was no doubt that this girl was a Knightley. A silence fell over the three as Conan tried to hide his internal horror as he watched the triumphant look form on his daughter's face upon angering Riddle.

"And why would that be?" Tom asked, his face devoid of emotion. Her eyes flickered from her father to the other man, giving him a quizzical look. It was not hard to figure out that he had been trying to make Horcruxes. With the amount of death on his hands, the thirst for power, and the fact that her father mentioned them far too often: Eleanor pieced the secret together when Voldemort was first on his rise.

"Because a man that fears death is the weakest amongst us." She told him, leaving her chair and passing them both. Immediately, her father was on her tail as she headed for the exit. Riddle hadn't moved. She knew. How could she? But then again, Aurora had figured out his plans before he had chance to do them.

"Eleanor, stop!" Conan called as she was midway up the stairs. The girl slowly turned and glowered at the man below her. He was seething. "What are you playing at? This is not like you. Are you trying to get yourself killed?" His tone was harsh but quiet enough that people didn't over hear them.

"I could ask you the same. Your name connected to a psychotic mass murder, not good for business." She said, taking a few steps closer to him. "Unless he is your business, your entire existence provided for you. But what did he get in return?" Eleanor asked, challengingly. The man before her looked as if he was about to burst.

"Watch your tone." He spat. "You are my daughter and should act accordingly. Do you forget that I control everything in your life?" The man asked rhetorically, trying to manipulate the situation. Little did he know that there was a small audience growing.

"Are you sure about that?" The girl cocked her head to the side, pretending to ponder his word. "I don't think that's true, is it now?" She said, standing in front of him with her arms crossed, taunting the older man.

"What are you on about girl?" He snarled, quickly running out of patients. A small laugh escaped the girl's lips as she raised a brow at him.

"You are nothing without me!" Eleanor borderline shouted, a smirk large on her face. Conan may have been physically taller but right now he felt two feet tall. In a spare of the moment decision, his hand harshly collided with the blonde's face as all the anger came bubbling out. Her face faltered from the impact but a small smile grew on her face from a multitude of gasps that sounded from behind them. She knew that people had been watching. This is what she wanted. "What you seem to forget is that everybody loves me." She whispered in his ear before picking up her dress and rushing away, pretending to be distraught. The tears were real though, that slap hurt and was throbbing like mad.  
  
  
  
  
  


"Rox!" She called, barging into her temporary room. The house elf appeared instantly, a look of worry plastered onto his face. "Can you take me back to Hogwarts? Now, please." She asked, the alcohol seemingly wearing off as she slowly took in what she had done. This was not good. With a nod of his head, he grabbed her hand and moments later the lit up castle came into view.

Holding her stomach, she felt dizzy and instantly ran to the wall. The girl began to throw up most of the alcohol she had ingested and the tiny portion of food that she was served, feeling slightly better. Apparating was not a good idea after drinking. Rox helped her up to the castle, not sure if it was the best idea to let her go. So, they sat in silence together. Enjoying the beautiful view of the black lake. Even though she had been here for a while, everything moved so fast that it was difficult to admire the beauty.

"Thank you, Rox. I best be getting back now." Eleanor said, shakily standing up. Her thoughts threatening to take over. What had she done. With a hesitant nod from the house elf, the blonde headed through the large double doors as she finally let her true tears fall. She once again felt nauseous as the nerves took over. The waiting was the worst. What would be the next move be? She couldn't stomach it.

As the common room door swung open, she could hear familiar laughs echoing around the room. She couldn't face them, not right now. Everything had their repercussions and what if she had just endangered them? Just being around them, she was a danger. That book was right about everything else. Them or her. All her actions just seemed to bring them close to death then her. At that thought, her stomach dropped. She hurried past the group, hearing calls of her name but she couldn't stop. She couldn't look at them. With a slam of the bathroom door, she knew they were trying to talk to her but she was transfixed on her own thoughts: throwing up again...

She leaned against the cool tiles, cooling her burning skin as she stared at the door. All different voices calling for her. It is not like she could explain. _Oh yeah, I kind of insulted Voldemort to his face and called him weak. Then, I pissed off my dad because the feeling of being above him is intoxicating. Also, I might have signed your death warrants. Goodnight._ In what universe did she come off as the good guy in that scenario?Probably all of them except the one circulating in her head.

"Ellie?" A voice closest to the door said softly, catching her attention and prompted the blonde to stand up. Her head spinning at the quick motion. Twisting the lock, she opened the door lightly and was greeted with silence. Nobody else was there. The door opened wider so she came face to face with the other blonde. Her eyes scanned the creased white dress, puffy under eyes, and then the bright red mark on her jaw that seemed to be bruising. Instead of speaking, Marlene pulled the girl into a hug and the tears began to fall again. The two fell to the floor as Eleanor buried her head into Marlene's shoulder, try to cling onto every second of affection that she could get.

"Look at me," Marlene said after a few moments of silence. "It's okay. You're okay." She told Eleanor, grasping each side of her face but not applying to much pressure to the bruised side. The girl brushed away the tears with her thumbs whilst the crying blonde observed her. Silence, it that moment it seemed so loud. "What happened?" Marlene asked, knowing that she wasn't likely to get an answer but she was hopeful. After all, she had told her last time.

"I- Tom Riddle." She said, to which the other frowned at. "Voldemort." Ellie corrected herself, watching the other flinch at the name. "He was there. Friends with my dad - apparently. He acted like he knew me. Like knew everything about me. A-and I may have insulted him and my dad and-" The girl explained, her breath quickened even as she tried to stay calm. "What have I done?" She added rhetorically, pulling her face out of the others touch. "From the way he reacted, I think that he has at least one Horcrux." Eleanor admitted, gulping.

"A horcrux? How'd you know?" She quizzed, frowning at the possibility. Yet, it made sense. That way, he was untouchable. They had no idea how many he had either.

"It makes sense. All he wants is this power. That way he never loses power because he never dies. But I think he's scared to die. He's weak." Eleanor mumbled, leaning back against the counter. "I told him that. I'm not scared of him but I am scared of what he might do. What if he goes after you or Lily or Remus or everyone else? I can't change that."

"You don't have to. You're not alone in this Ellie." Marls told her, taking her hand in hers as she missed El's touch. The girl didn't pull away and entwined their fingers instead. "It is me and you, remember. Anything you need, I have." She said to her, repeating the words that Eleanor had originally told her. "Your fights are our fights." The girl told her, a faint smile pulling onto El's lips. She wasn't alone, it was about time she realised that...  
  



	30. rooftop talks

  
**_chapter thirty_ **

「 _rooftop talks_ 」

♱

Because the birdsong might be pretty,  
But it's not for you they sing,  
And if you think my winter is too cold,  
You don't deserve my spring.

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 _**MARCH, KNOWN FOR** _the beginning of spring in Britain. A time of new beginnings and a welcoming of new life. The nights were starting to get light again and blossom was starting to bloom on the bare branches. Along with the floral arrangements came the return of the woodland creatures. From Hedgehogs to Cornish Pixies, the hibernation period was over as things seemed to be settling at Hogwarts for the first time in months. As the fifth and seventh years prepared for the exams, everyone else had been forced out of the library, dorms, and Great hall so the smoking spot had been populated by all their friends. Not like Eleanor spoke to them much. The paranoia of being around them got to much. Marlene, Edith and Dorcas stayed with her most of the time because that way she couldn't worm her way out. 

The morning after her birthday, she had awoken to an empty dorm room and a rather large box on the end of her bed that she almost knocked off. She had told Lily not to buy her anything and the rest she didn't even tell that it was her birthday. To her surprise, it was filled to the brim with things wrapped in red tissue paper - she didn't know whether that was because it was her favourite colour was red or because she is a Gryffindor. On top of all of it was a rectangular piece of card that had Lily's elegant writing sprawled across it:

_You said that I couldn't buy you anything, so I didn't. Enjoy your handmade presents._

_Next time, tell us when your birthday is._

_James!_

_Wha- Ow, Evans!_

The blonde couldn't help but laugh at the two, he had obviously used a self writing quill that picked up on their conversation. She wondered what her best friend had done, probably a slap to the back of the head like she gave Eleanor. She dove through the box, revealing clusters of photos from most of her friends. Alice and Frank had baked her some Apple turnovers, Marlene had sewn her a new dress - she never knew the girl was into fashion design, Remus had gotten her a book but she didn't mind, James had done the same and gotten her a David Bowie album as he claimed that she only told Lily not to buy her anything. Though, she assumed that this was originally for Remus who's birthday was a week or so away. Mary had left an IOU for flying lessons, Isadora had made her a bracelet with charms she had sculpted herself, Lily had gifted her a beautiful silver Dahlia necklace that her dad likely crafted as he was a steel worker and had made jewellery before. It was her favourite flower too, she couldn't believe that the redhead remembered. She had pointed them out in Lily's garden when they were seven, expressing her admiration. 

But the last thing in the box had her utterly confused. It was something rolled up and kept together by elastic bands, she pulled them down and unravelled the parchment. Her mouth dropped open slightly as she marvelled at the moving drawing that had seemingly been done in charcoal. It was all of the girl's together, a drawing of the photo they got at the Christmas ball. Her eyes trailed down to the signature, _S.B._ She had no idea that he drew. Honestly, she was speechless. The two hadn't spoken since Valentine's day and he had done this for her, unless he had drawn it a month ago or something. She should thank him. It was a Sunday so he could be anywhere but she hoped that he would be in their dorms.

Well, he certainly was. She pulled open the hatch to reveal a sight that she did not expect but was somehow not surprised about. Her face began to flush profusely as she shut the hatch again whilst Darnell seemed to be scrambling out the room as quickly as possible. It is strange how things go full circle, how she originally used Slytherin to make someone jealous and that said Slytherin was now sucking him off. It was laughable really. She really just wished that she had knocked. It wasn't what they were doing that left her embarrassed, it was the fact she had walked in on such a private moment. Pretending like it didn't happen was her safest bet. The girl returned to her room to grab her cigarettes, deciding the roof was the best place to smoke as her friends were potentially at the tree. 

"Ella." He said as she appeared out of her hatch, she didn't say anything as she took a seat on the tiles. Her back was pressed against the wall as she faced the pointed roof. Hesitantly, he sat next to her as she offered him a cigarette. The panic on his face fell for a second as he accepted and she passed him the lighter. Both of them sat in silence until Eleanor had a drag of her cigarette, sinking down the wall as her eyes fluttered shut. It wasn't as peaceful as the tree but it was a decent substitute. "Look, I need you to promise me that you won't tell anyone." He said, causing her eyes to open once more. She could see the fear brewing by the second, even though he tried to hide it.

"Why would I do that? Its none of my business." Eleanor replied, watching as he sighed in relief before pulling his cigarette back to his lips. 

"People aren't the most accepting. I mean, James knows but that's the only straight person that does. Well, apart from you." Sirius said, feeling slightly odd by speaking about this, especially with her. But the blonde practically gagged on her smoke as a laugh escaped her lips. 

"I forget that most people don't know." She replied, causing the boy to frown. "Sirius, I'm Bi." The girl told him, she had admitted that more in the past six months then in the past seventeen years. See with her friends in France, she told them in a collective and that wasn't quite the case here. Merlin, Lily didn't even know. At this point, she probably did.

"Oh." Was all he mustered, not registering what she had said. "Ohhh..." The boy said after a moment, leading both of them to laugh. "Wait, who knows?" He asked, meeting her eye after she stubbed out her cigarette.

"Well. Marlene, Remus and Peter are the people I have explicitly told. I think. Honestly, I'm not even sure." Eleanor tried to remember, she had no idea. That would probably come back to bite her, not like that was important to her. 

"You told Peter before me? or even Lily for that matter." He said quizzically. Though they were close friends, he would quite literally be the last person he told about his sexuality. Something was off about him and he couldn't figure out what.

"It was circumstance. The only one that I told without it already being brought up was Marls." Eleanor explained, looking back at the roof. "This is about you, though." She added after a pause. "Trying to worm your way out of talking?"

"I would never." He said with a smile gracing his features. "But there isn't much to talk about. I don't care, basically. People are people. That label shit isn't for me, if I like someone than I like someone." 

"Fair. Its whatever you're comfortable with." The blonde said, making his smile widen slightly as he looked at her. "What you staring at, _darling_?" She asked, catching him of guard like he had the other month. A smirk crossed her face as she watched him scramble for an answer in her peripheral vision. 

"Don't start something you can't win, Westbrook." Sirius said, feigning a threatening tone as she let out an amused huff.

"Is that a challenge? Wise words for someone that didn't finish." She taunted as she grabbed her lighter. The smirk didn't leave either of their lips as she returned to her hatch. "Thank you, by the way. I love the drawing." Ellie told him, hopping into the girl's room as he was left with his thoughts. 

That was the last she talked to him for a while. Not on purpose, the girl's kept her busy. One thing was for sure, Darnell could no longer look in her direction. He was not taking the whole scenario well. Eleanor was pretty sure that he was going to jump Sirius at one point. Though, she couldn't blame him. The boy was scared. Like Eleanor, he knew what it was like to have every pair of eyes on him and constantly monitored. It was enough to drive anyone insane. She would wait for him to speak to her when he's ready he'll talk. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, I just wanted to talk about this chapter. I have always seen Sirius as a Queer character, even in this book. This scene is implemented because of the collateral that I have planned for later in the book. Now, Eleanor and Sirius are technically a 'straight' couple, that does NOT mean that their sexuality's are not valid. I know a lot of bi/pan/etc. struggle with prejudice when it comes to dating the opposite sex from both the community and straight. I have dealt with this and I put a majority of myself into this book and the characters. As you often see, most people Sirius is with are female and that is because the Marauders are set in the seventies - that is why there is a lot of struggle with identity and such because most people could only express themselves behind close doors. You as a reader only know what Eleanor knows or what Eleanor is bound to find out about, I did this on purpose so you grow with the story. Without this scene, we would probably not know of either men's sexuality and if it wasn't stated then future actions wouldn't make sense. If you have any queries, drop a comment or dm me as I am happy to explain/talk about/etc. 
> 
> It is LGBTQ+ history month here in England, take time to educate yourself!
> 
> I know it is quite short but I wanted to get something out. I was kind of stuck on what to do and adding anything else didn't feel right!
> 
> \- Isla <3


	31. snape's worst memory

**_chapter thirty one_ **

「 _snape's worst memory_ 」

♱

_filthy mudblood_

♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


 ** _APRIL CAME AND_** the two blondes had been practising their music none stop. Delilah was practically off the radar, not even showing up to lessons most of the time. When they did see her, she looked deathly ill. Not like they could comment on that. She only talked to Lily. It was very odd behaviour to say the least. Dorcas tried to fill in but wasn't short of tragic when playing. So, Edith very cleverly conjured up a spell for the drums to play themselves.

"Just play the cords then! I won't make you sing." Marlene huffed, the four girls crowded in the Gryffindor common room on their free lesson. The three had had charms together next and Edith had a hour to 'study' but the the girl had never revised once in her life. So, they thought it was best to cram in practice before the seventh and fifth years show up. It was probably the only time the common room was free so they could play freely. "It's not like you sang in front of the whole school already." She added under her breath.

"I can hear you." El shot back with a smile that the other girl matched. "Besides, that was a one time thing. You know I'll sing back up." She explained, adjusting her grip on the neck of the guitar. The two Slytherin's watched with amused expressions. Each time they wanted to practice, the same mini argument would occur and would end with Marlene caving. "Maybe you should get Dorcas to sing with you." El suggested, causing the mentioned girl to go wide eyed. This was new. The Gryffindor sent a wink her way, causing her to blush. "Edith can play the piano. Problem solved."

"I can play the piano. Am I going to? Absolutely not." Edith laughed, sitting down next to Eleanor as Dorcas hovered awkwardly near Marls.

"You can sing? Why didn't I know of this?" The Hufflepuff asked, feigning her sadness. Dorcas raised a brow, shrugging in response. She didn't even know how Ellie knew, Edith probably told her. Snitch. She glared at the two on the sofa, both of them wearing matching smirks. They were scheming, she could tell. Both of them knew of her current conflicting feelings towards Marlene, she wouldn't put it past them two to try something. When El turned and whispered in Edith's ear, she knew that they were in fact setting something up.

"No. Well, yes. Not well." She answered, taking a seat in the arm chair opposite Marlene. Dorcas wasn't exactly 'girly' or into much things that correlated. To be seen as strong, she felt like she had to act a certain way and look a certain way and feel a certain way. Before they could continue, Eleanor strum the first few cords to the song they'd been learning; Rhiannon.

"Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night, And wouldn't you love to love her?" Marlene began to sing, a smile bracing onto El's face as she did so. "Takes to the sky like a bird in flight, And who will be her lover?" She couldn't help but look towards Eleanor who was focused on her guitar. But the blonde already knew the answer to that question. No matter who the girl dated or how much they avoided the truth. The way that Sirius looked at her and the way that she looked at him was unmatched.

"All your life you've never seen a woman, taken by the wind. Would you stay if she promised you heaven?" And Eleanor could promise her the world but Heaven was reserved for him. "Will you ever win?" No. Not in this lifetime.

"She is like a cat in the dark. And then she is to darkness." It was unexpected when they met, out of no where almost. And the blonde fell head first without realising. Now, Marlene couldn't escape these feelings. "She rules her life like a fine skylark, And when the sky is starless." Yes, without him then she may have had a chance. But she didn't. Even when she told herself that, her feelings never changed. If she had feeling for another or not, she couldn't help the feelings that she continued to taunt her for the past five years.

"All your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind. Would you stay if she promised you heaven? Will you ever win? Will you ever win?" The girl looked back at her own guitar, trying to snap out of it. Yet Dorcas saw the looks and the feeling of pining, she felt the same. If only she noticed that she could give her heaven if Marlene gave her a chance...

"Rhiannon," Eleanor sang softly, "Rhiannon, Rhiannon," The blonde was far from oblivious. She knew why Marlene chose this song, she noticed the way she stared, and she noticed the way Dorcas suffered. Even if she loved Marlene, she could never return the strength of her love. That was something she accepted but she was also selfish. She could lose Marlene, no matter if it hurt them or others. It wasn't platonic love either. But her heart was stolen by another. It was him, it always had been and always will be. "Rhiannon."

"She rings like a bell through the night. And wouldn't you love to love her?" Marlene couldn't keep up this cycle. It wasn't good for anyone involved. She was addicted. The pain, the love, the neutral: it was a beautiful nightmare. "She rules her life like a bird in flight, And who will be her lover?"

"All your life you've never seen a woman taken by the wind. Would you stay if she promised you heaven? Will you ever win? Will you ever win?" Then she thought of the comfort that Dorcas had brought this year alone and none of it seemed worth it. She knew what the best option was but was that the one she was willing to take?

"Rhiannon," It was stupid, wasn't it. They were only sixteen and seventeen but felt like everything needed to be planned out now. The fear of war had dug into them all quickly. To be honest, they didn't know if they were fighting or not. Eleanor did. The day of her birthday, she had declared which side she was on. "Rhiannon, Rhiannon," Nobody knew who was going survive. "Rhiannon." Options were selected and confirmed. Their forever could be two years or fifty. Nobody knew for sure.

"Dreams unwind. Love's a state of mind." It was true, love was a state of mind. One that contorted and manipulated everything around them. It was enough to drown you but the lucky few were kept afloat. "Dreams unwind.  
Love's a state of mind." Marlene trailed off as Eleanor played the ending chords. Sometimes listening to the mind over the heart was the best strategy. There was less heartbreak involved, that was the only promise.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  


"What's got you so joyful?" Eleanor asked, taking her seat next to Remus in Herbology. The boy had a dreamy look on his face as he stared at the poisonous plant. Not the usual expression that one pulls whilst a few centimetres from instant death. He turned towards the girl and just smiled.

"Nothing." He sighed, happily. The boy opened up his notebook, trying to avoid her heavy gaze. A smirk crossed her lips, she knew what that look entailed.

"Somebodies in loveee." She drawled, his face becoming a beat red as the other boys joined them. His mouth was agape as she wondered how she knew. That girl knew everything. A laugh escaped her lips as she took her seat. "That was a guess but now I'm intrigued." El said, catching the other boys attention. "So, tell me. Who is it?"

"You know I'm with Delilah, right?" He said, trying to divert the conversation but she just raised a brow at him.

"No. She hasn't spoke to me in over a month." The girl shot back, causing the boy to frown. That was odd. Delilah often left to hang out with Eleanor. Strange. He didn't have time to question that. "Cough it up."

"I- They. I can't say." He muttered, looking back at his book. It was true, he had sworn that he wouldn't tell anyone until the other was ready. However, the days past and he hadn't even attempted to try. He wasn't in a position to push anyone. Remus hadn't told anyone, he had suggested it to Eleanor and that was it. Maybe he could start their. Out of everyone, he could trust her. She may have known him the least amount of time but she had already done the most. But he was interrupted.

"Where'd you get that?" Peter asked, both of them turned to see James playing with a Golden Snitch. It flew around his head and he grabbed the ball before it could shoot away.

"Nicked it," James said, triumphantly, as he ruffled up his hair. He did the same again. Letting go of the snitch, catching it, and repeating the same action. It was rather loud and distracting, causing the redhead in front of them to whizz around and shoot daggers his way.

"Put that away, will you?" Sirius mumbled, looking rather fed up."Before Wormtail wets himself from excitement." He added with a cheeky grin. The blonde frowned at his friend as he pulled his eyes off the snitch. It was rather intriguing to him. Peter was never fast enough or strong enough for quidditch, no matter how much he loved the sport.

Mrs Adenic began to talk about the plants. She was so old that she looked as if she was about to talk herself to death. Bar that - she was a lovely woman. Her niece Pomona had come into assist during this lesson, she had done studies of this plant during her travels. So, she was claimed an expert. Perfect example to use in their exams next year.

"I'm bored," Whispered Sirius. "Wish it was full moon." He said mindlessly, looking out the window. The full moon had been a few days ago and was probably the best one that all four of them had had.

"You might," Remus said through gritted teeth, only calming down when El placed a hand on top of his arm. "If you actually did your work then you would have something to do." The boy told him, turning back to his own work.

"I don't need to read all this shit, I know it all." Sirius protested, earning an eye roll from everyone but James who was scribbling something down on a piece of ripped parchment that he took from his essay.

"This'll liven you up, Padfoot," said James quietly, nudging the boy as he sent the ball of paper across the room. It hit Severus on the back of the head and he turned around in a startled haze, probably daydreaming about Lily. Disgusting. His eyes shot to the two boys who were stifling laughter. Snape picked up the note and unravelled the childish drawing. The boy immediately snarled and turned around to write something back.

"Mr Snape! What on Earth are you doing. Give me that." Mrs Adenic snapped, grabbing his note. Her jaw instantly dropped. "I can't believe such a thing from you. Ten points from Slytherin and a months detention!" She said in disgust and the class fell silent. All of them where intrigued to what he had put. Of course, Sirius and James were laughing so hard that no sound came out.  
  
  
  
  
  


♱  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After Charms and Herbology, the day was over and Eleanor had returned to her dorm to change. She slipped into a pair of flared jeans and baggy Pink Floyd t-shirt that she stole from Mary. Upon exiting the bathroom, she noticed something sat on Lily's bed. Venturing forward, it was an eaten box of chocolates. Red alarms raided in her mind, especially after Izzy's random box.

_I'm sorry._   
_\- Severus_

Her jaw clenched. There was no difference between these and the ones Isadora had received. Was these containing potions too? They were from the same person. She knew that for sure. Then all she could see was red. Throwing on her Dr Martens, she grabbed her wand and charged out of the common room. Mary had been waiting for her and had followed after the girl who seemed set in her ways. The two scrambled out the school and across the courtyard as Eleanor tried to find the boy across the grounds. It was the first hot day of the year so basically everybody was outside. He had a certain spot where he would sit and that was where she was headed.

"Slow down, El. What's happened?" Mary questioned, keeping up with the girl. Not once had she seen the girl angry, even after the shit she had been put through by some. So, she was mad too. Mary wasn't one to follow but in this moment there was no need for explanation.

"Lily." Was the only word that the blonde could muster, charging towards the lake. It was like an automatic response to protect her and Mary knew that she wasn't mad at the redhead. She was acting like she was going to take down the world, just to protect her best friend. But Lily would do the same. And he was sat there, nose buried into a potions book. His eyes flickered up just in time to see Eleanor approaching with her wand already drawn.

"What do you want?" He spat, scrambling to his feet as he tried to keep a neutral expression. There was a moment of silent as his few simple words fuelled her fire. The boy gulped. He was staring at her as if her eyes had turned completely black. He was afraid and she couldn't help the involuntary smile that spread across her lips. It was intoxicating. She loved how he cowered, how he shrunk a whole foot, and how he was so threatened just by her presence.

No. Her eyes snapped shut. That wasn't her.

"You gave her them, didn't you? What did you do? Slip her a love potion?" She seethed, the tip of her wand buried into his throat as people started to notice the commotion around them.

"I don't know what you're on about!" He retorted. But he did. The boy knew exactly what she meant and he gulped, looking around for an escape. He wasn't supposed to get caught.

"Your name was on the box. She ate them. All of them." Eleanor retorted, watching his eyes go wide. That was not supposed to happen.

"W- What?" He stumbled out, looking fearful. This was not supposed to happen. "They weren't for her!" He gasped as the wand pierced the surface of his skin, causing him to almost choke.

"Who was they for? What were they supposed to do?" She yelled, far to consumed by her anger to notice anyone else around them. Her breathing was rapid as she glared him down. How did no one else notice the way she looked?

"You. They were for you!" He answered, purposefully avoiding the second question. The pressure on his neck was released and she stepped back, cocking her head to the side as she examined him.

"And you really think that I'd be so stupid to eat them?" Eleanor taunted, a sick smile spreading onto her lips. This wasn't her. Even Snape knew that as she watched the boy morph with concern.

"I know what you are. You have no idea what you got yourself into." The boy said through gritted teeth, nobody else could hear what he said. Instead of morphing into fearful mess like he expected, she just smiled.

"I don't know what you're on about." She told him but he believed that. If they didn't know that she knew then she had the upper hand. "When I find Lily, I'm going to explain to her what happened. Do you think she'll even spare you a glance then?"

"That's not fair." He protested, knowing that the blonde was right.

"What's not fair is her having you as a friend. She has been nothing but kind to you. And what did you do? Join the people that want to get rid of everyone like her. James was right about you." Eleanor spat, turning away to rejoin a snarling Mary. That last line was bound to ruffle his feathers. She didn't care for the boy no more. In the last few months, she had realised what he was truly like and she didn't loathe anyone more.

"Expelliarmus!" A voice shouted as Snape's wand flew twelve feet into the air and fell with a little thud in the grass behind him. The Marauders had arrived with James pointing his wand at Severus. He had tried to curse the blonde with her back turned.

Sirius let out a bark of laughter before shouting "Impedimenta!" And Snape was knocked off his feet, halfway through a dive toward his own fallen wand. Everyone had now gathered to watch another showed down between the two sides. It used to be a weekly thing but the Gryffindor's couldn't be bothered with him anymore. There was better ways to waste their time.

"Not very kind to attack a lady, especially with her back turned." James told him, sending a wink to Eleanor who was already smirking. Peter snickered shrilly. Snape was trying to get up, but the jinx was still operating on him; he was struggling, as though bound by invisible ropes.

"You — wait," he panted, staring up at James with an expression of utter distaste. Hatred. "You — wait. . . ."

"Wait for what?" Sirius asked, feigning interest in what he had to say. "What're you going to do, Snivelly, wipe your nose on us?"

"Fuck off!" He snapped, getting a roar of laughter out of him. He was muttering spells under his breath but none of them were working and his wand was ten feet away so nothing happened.

"Not very nice," James hollered before sending a spell his way. "Scourgify!" Pink soap bubbles streamed from Snape's mouth at once; the froth was covering his lips, making him gag, choking him. His face was become a similar shade and where Eleanor would usually stop this behaviour, she felt like it was deserved. More than deserved really. A laugh left her lips as Mary and her stared at the struggling boy. She didn't like him either, she had seen the hurt that he had caused Lily and agreed that he deserved it.

"Leave him ALONE!" Everyone snapped to the source of the voice and the laughter immediately stopped.

"All right, Evans?" James spoke , and the tone of his voice was suddenly pleasant, deeper, more mature. Like he had suddenly snapped out of his old childish ways.

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated. She was looking at James and then her eyes found El and her anger fizzled. "What's he done to you?"

"Well," He looked to Eleanor who just shook her head. Sucking in a breath, he pulled on his old smirk and resorted back to his old ways "It's more the fact that he exists, if you know what I mean. . . ."

"You think you're funny," The redhead began, looking at him through the slits that her eyes had formed. "But you're just an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone."

"I will if you go out with me, Evans," James shot, going all in. He knew that it wouldn't work but there was a reason that El didn't want the redhead to know. So, he took that shake of the head and ran with it. "Go on. . . Go out with me, and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again."Behind him, the Impediment Jinx was wearing off. Snape was beginning to inch toward his fallen wand, spitting out soapsuds as he crawled.

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid!" Lily shouted, almost looking mental as she did so. The potion.

"Bad luck, Prongs," Sirius swooped in to help his best friend. The blonde took a step forward and the boy's eyes shot to Snape that was now on his feet with his wand drawn. "Oi!" But it was too late; Snape had sent a spell his way and a gash appeared on the side of James's face, spattering his robes with blood. With a swirl of his wand, Snape was hoisted up into the air by his left leg. And he moved his wand again and his pants slipped up to reveal skinny pale legs and dirty underwear. Eleanor cringed at the sight as Peter almost doubled over in laughter along with the other watchers. The boy holding him up couldn't help but beam at the crowds reaction, sometimes he missed it.

"Let him down!" The redhead shrieked, feeling embarrassed for her friend. Plus, she didn't want to see that anymore. In fact, she had to hold her sick in.

"Certainly," James said, pulling him up lightly before dropping him. Snape fell into a crumpled heap on the ground.

Disentangling himself and pulling up his trousers, he grabbed his wand and pointed it straight at James"Petrificus Totalus!" Sirius called and Snape fell back in an instant, he was as rigid as a board.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted. The girl had pulled out her own wand with a shaky hand, prompting Eleanor to come hurrying over to the boys. Her emerald eyes faults red as she looked torn. There must be a reason that the blonde let this happen, right? Right, she reminded herself. However, her wand was still drawn. "Take the curse off him, then!" The redhead said like it was the most obvious thing to do. The group knew that Severus would attack as soon as he could move. James sighed deeply, then turned to Snape and muttered the counter curse.

"There you go," He said as Snape struggled to sort himself out. "You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus —"

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!" Snape cut the boy off in a heated rage. There was silence that spread across the entire group. Lily blinked. She had expected this from him but a part of her felt like she should forgive him instantly. That made her freeze more than the actual words themselves. This wasn't right. Her lips parted slightly as everyone waited for her response.

"Fine," Lily spoke as if this was nothing new because it wasn't and El knew that. "I won't bother in future." Turning to leave but she froze. "And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus." She spat, a smirk coming across her lips as she looked at Eleanor who winked at her.

"Apologize to Evans!" James roared at Snape, his wand pointed threateningly at him, even when the blonde tried to stop him.

"I don't want you to make him apologize," Lily shouted, in disbelief of the boy. "You're as bad as he is..." The redhead sputtered out but she didn't mean that, she knew that Ellie knew that too.

"What?" He said, in disbelief. "I'd NEVER call you a — you-know-what!" James countered, looking utterly confused by the words that left her lips.

"Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can — I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK." It was everything that had built up over time and she just needed to let everything out. And with that, she turned on her heel and hurried away.

"Evans!" He called. Nothing. The boy turned to Eleanor for advise and she noises her head to the direction that Lily was going. Without second thought, he hurried off. Peter didn't seem impressed as he turned away to join Remus at the tree they were previously sat at. But the blonde wasn't done. Not yet. Her eyes hadn't left the boy who had shrunk a foot even once the crowd had dispersed.

"Ella?" Sirius was watching her quizzically. She licked her lower lip, her jaw clenched, and her green eyes becoming dark. At that point, she had her mind made up. Whilst Snape was trying to grab his things, Eleanor was marching his way. He didn't have time to react because she was already less than a metre away.

Crack. Pain rippled through his face as a violent red liquid oozed out of his, now, broken nose. He hadn't expected that. Again, he was met with that bone chilling look that was quickly replaced by a sly smile. Her dainty fingers clenched onto the his chin to make sure that he was looking her in the eye. The grasp was so tight that he was squirming beneath her as he hoped that she didn't draw anymore blood. This was Eleanor treating him kindly, he knew that and she made sure of that fact.

"I am only going to tell you this once." She whispered to him as the boy nodded. "You and your friends are to watch themselves. This is the last time that i'll let any of you get away with this shit. We are on my terms now. None of my friends are apart of this, stop using them to get to me. There's nothing I hate more than cowardice." She drawled as she felt how fast his heart was beating. The girl could here it in her head, this was new. "I'm no longer a Westbrook. You tell the boys that, you tell my father that, and you can tell Voldemort that when you go for that dark mark. Yes, I know all about that." With that, she let go of his face and threw him back to the floor as he groaned. It was a look like no one else had seen on the girl. Like she had shed this coat that kept her dull, now she was glowing. That kind warmth in her eyes had been replaced by the devil and it was smirking as she came face to face with the group of Slytherins. Two of them came forward to help Snape up. Mary and Sirius had joined her side as the numbers where extremely unbalanced.

"What did I say. Of course it was this bitch." Yaxley snarled, standing with his arms folded with the other boys gathered round. The group began to laugh and soon phased out at the melodic laughter that stood in front of them. It was unsettling for them.

"It's not exactly unexpected, was it." She told him, crossing her arms over her chest. It was like a face off but neither side budged. Nobody was going to attack the other, each of them knew that. "What do you want, Yaxley?" Ellie huffed, getting increasingly bored by their presence.

"Our friend needed some help and here we are." The boy shrugged, that evil glint circulating through his eyes. "To be honest, I thought that you would be on your best behaviour. Did your father not slap any sense into you? He's not happy with you." He taunted, speaking quite literally. Both Mary and Sirius seemed confused as the opposition was all smirking.

"I don't care." Eleanor shook her head, a giggle escaping her lips. "I'm sure Severus won't mind telling you how little I care." She added, staring at the skittish boy who visibly gulped when she looked his way. With one last smirk, she linked arms with Mary and the two began to depart.

"Oi, Westbrook!" Avery shouted at her, causing her to pause and turn back around. He was about to say something to her when she cut him off.

"It's not Westbrook anymore. It's Knightley." She told them all. By the morphed shock on some of their faces, they knew who the Knightley women were. But it was a declaration of war. She was no longer protected by her family name. The girl was ready and they weren't. It was actually the last thing that they expected to leave her lips. Because if it was one against twenty, she could handle them but it was the matter of if they were ready for her. She knew very little about herself and what she was. But, she was prepared. The name wasn't protecting her, it was protecting them. It had been for years.

When she disappeared, so did the other boys. Leaving the two brothers face to face. One was stood with a clenched jaw and the other had replicated the smirk of the blonde. They both knew what this meant and this was not how it was supposed to go.

"What did you do? This was your doing, wasn't it?" Regulus snapped, fury seeming to wash over his features. Everything was going wrong. Six simple words had changed all of their plan. But the other brother just laughed lightly, shaking his head.

"You forget that I am bound by an unbreakable vow. Until I am dead, you can be assured that it wasn't me. Though, I'm glad she knows. That prophecy died the minute that her mother passed. I would prepare yourself to fight her instead of making room for her to join you. There's no one to blame but yourselves." Sirius told him, rendering the other boy mute. No. This can not be happening. Not now. He had made a promise and now it looked less likely that he could to make do on said promise. That mark was not going to be his when word got out about this. What comes next - shame? outcast? He had to manipulate this situation. Spin it as a good tale. When his eyes landed on his brother, he knew exactly what he must do. No matter the cost.  
  
  



End file.
